A Touch Of Sin [BxB] - Chapter 25: Chapter 25

Considering everything that has happened this week, when I told Ma I was heading up to see Ellie and Haze, I purposely didn't say I would be travelling with Jake. I merely mentioned a friend; who I know she thinks is Rhett. I don't bother to correct her in fear she won't let me go.
Rhett...
Exhaling, I finally go into my contacts, searching for his number. I've been meaning to do this all night but have been avoiding it.
"Hey!" he greets cheerfully and I close my eyes, exhaling softly.
"Hey Rhett."
"What time are we meeting tomorrow? I was thinking after surfing, you could come back here and hang out, my mum is so excited to meet you. I have the whole afternoon planned; it's going to be awesome!"
Guilt floods my stomach as I stare hard down at the ground. The silence is loaded. I hear his breathing on the other end change slightly.
"Cal?"
I splay my fingers across my forehead, squeezing my eyes shut.
"Oh," he says after another heavily-filled moment of silence. "You're not coming."
"I'm really sorry," I whisper.
"Let me guess, you're going to be with him?" his tone has a bite to it I've never heard before.
"It's complicated."
"Yeah, I got that." I wince at the frostiness of his voice, making my guilt intensify.
"I'd still really like to get to know you, Rhett. But friendship is all I can offer right now. I'm sorry."
I pick at the intentional rip in my jeans as I wait for his response. I hang my head as the pause is drawn out to the point where I think I may as well hang up.
"I know I said I could before but I don't think I can be just friends with you," he eventually says, his voice laced with bitterness. "See you around."
My heart is hammering. I slowly lower the phone and stare at it. That was worse than I expected. Rhett has always been so easy-going about everything I had with Jake. I've been upfront and honest this entire time. I guess it changed after the date and especially because he's told his mum about me. I've really let him down. I never should have gone in the first place.
With my stomach in knots, I crawl into bed, curling up into a ball. I bury my head into my pillows.
I hope I haven't just made a big mistake.
***
Thankfully Ma left early this morning. As we're both away over the weekend, Grant's family have taken Charlie. They have a Labrador, named Elvis, who is basically best buddies with Charlie. I hate going away when mum does and leave him here alone. Grant's mum is always happy to take him in which is a relief.
I texted Rhett when I woke, saying I'm sorry, but haven't heard back from him. I sigh. This situation sucks.
Spotify is playing on shuffle but it seems to only be playing sad songs, whilst I throw my things into my bag. I was really looking forward to this weekend but now I just feel crap about cancelling on Rhett. I thought it was the right thing to do, but it's made me feel terrible.
"This is some depressing shit," a voice says from behind me, making me startle and possibly kink my neck in the process.
"When did you get here?" I exclaim, holding a hand over my chest and my other rubbing at my neck gingerly.
"Been watching you stare at the wall for about two minutes," he states.
He's dressed in a dark green, knitted jumper that falls long down his sides and ripped jeans. His hair is dishevelled but perfectly so. I could stare at him all day.
"Spotify thinks I'm sad today," I shrug.
"Are you?"
"I feel a bit shit cancelling on Rhett," I admit, falling back onto my bed and leaning back onto my hands.
At the mention of him, Jake's eyes flash angrily.
"J, I need to be able to talk to you about these things and you not overreact."
I watch his fists clench and unclench as he blows out a long breath. He nods, walking to the bed and sitting beside me.
"Why do you feel shit?"
"He was really excited about hanging out. Had all these plans and I cancelled. Last minute, basically."
"You're going to see your sister. Don't feel bad."
"He knows I'll be with you," I point out.
Jake shrugs. "So? He knew what he was getting into."
I nod slowly. "I know but I still feel bad."
"Even I almost feel bad for him," he says with a head shake. "I know what it's like to want you. I'm lucky enough to..." he trails off. I know he was going to say 'have you' but he technically doesn't. "To have the chance," he finally finishes.
Without even realising what I'm doing, I reach up and cup my hand around his face. We stare hard into each other's eyes for a few moments. I ran my hand down his face, memorising every line, every freckle, every inch of him into my mind. His icy eyes, his long lashes, his parted lips.
"You're beautiful," I tell him, my eyes drinking in every part of him, bruises and cuts included.
He leans into my hand, his eyes closing. "Only you think that."
I rub my thumb against his cheek and he makes a soft sound in his throat. "We both know that's not true."
My hand drops to my lap as he says, "We should get going, try to beat the traffic."
I grab my last-minute things before trailing after him. I throw my bag onto the backseat and climb into the front. The cab is warm from his drive over. I nestle into the seats and cover myself with the blanket I brought.
"Don't think you're sleeping this trip," he side-eyes me.
"Just cold," I reply.
The truck rumbles to life and Jake puts a playlist on. He pauses for a moment, as if waiting for something. I glance over to him, just as he leans across and plants a kiss on the corner of my mouth. I blink in surprise as he sits back, a flush creeping up his neck.
"What was that for?" I ask.
"For being here," is all he replies before pushing the truck into gear and peeling away from the curb.
***
With my feet on the dash, the loud music blaring and the boy I love beside me, I can confidently say that all my worries from this morning have diminished. I almost forgot how cruisy and carefree he can be when it's just us. He makes me fall in love with him over and over again.
I smile down at my phone at the photos we took that day at the beach. With where the sun is positioned, the lighting is fantastic. His smile makes the photo though.
"I love this," I tell him, holding out the phone so he can see.
He smiles. One of his rare smiles that I know is only reserved for me. "Me too."
I change his name in my phone to J with a heart and that picture as his photo. Swiping across to the camera, I turn and take a photo of him with the wind in his hair, one hand on the wheel, his breezy smile on his lips.
"Perfect," I whisper.
Reaching out, he slips his fingers between mine. I close my eyes, a grin on my face.
In these moments, it's impossible to remember all the heart break. I love him and there's nothing that is ever going to change this.