A Touch Of Sin [BxB] - Chapter 6: Chapter 6

"How was the rest of your weekend?" Grant asks as we walk to school, our Vans slapping to an uneven beat on the pavement.
I try to keep a neutral look on my face as I shrug. "Non-eventful. Yours?"
"Pretty much the same," he takes a sip of his coffee.
I want to tell Grant about Jake. I really do. But I feel like it's something so extremely intimate and private between us that it would feel like I was exposing us, or something. I don't know. I also feel like it's not something I should share unless Jake is ready for me to, which I'm guessing is a big, fat no.
"Did you message Alice after the party?"
"Oh shit," I sigh. "She messaged me. I never replied."
"Ouch."
"I was... surprised." Grant says cautiously and I notice he's doing that weird thing with his lips that he does when he's feeling a bit awkward. "About you. And Alice."
I roll my lips together. "Mm."
I can see the struggle he's facing. He wants to ask me if I'm gay, but doesn't know how.
"Me too," I eventually say.
Grant's eyes are on the side of my face. "Can I say something without sending like a dick?"
I stop walking and face him. "Sure."
Red splotches have appeared across his neck. He looks like he's swallowed something too big for his throat.
"Say it, Grant, it's okay," I say quietly.
"Are you..." he looks the most uncomfortable I've ever seen him. "I mean, for a while now, I've thought..."
"Thought what?" I ask calmly.
He wants me to just come out and say it, but I don't. I stand there, patiently, waiting. I even sip my coffee.
He exhales. "Cal, is there something you need to tell me?"
I nod. "Yes."
"Is it... that you're..."
"Go on."
"Are you gay?"
It's out. The secret that I've held in for so long. That I tried to suppress.
"Yes," I answer.
He doesn't look surprised. He nods slowly. "Okay."
"Okay."
We continue to walk and I physically feel a weight lift off my shoulders. That was easier than I thought but really, I always knew I could tell Grant. I just let fear overrule me and fill me with anxiety.
"Why did that happen with Alice on the weekend? Was it just an experiment, or?"
I chew at my lip. I love Grant. He's my best friend. But I don't know if I can tell him this.
"There's someone," I begin and now I'm the one who is feeling awkward. "I don't know. I guess I just acted out. I wanted to know if they cared. If they felt the same about me."
"Do they?"
I nod. "Yeah. I think they do."
"That's cool, Cal. I'm happy for you," he says and bumps my shoulder. "Can I know who?"
"Not yet. Is that okay?"
"Of course." He glances at me and I look away. I feel like he can see the answers in my eyes. "Poor Alice. I feel sorry for her. Hope she doesn't think she turned you, when this all comes out."
I punch his shoulder. "Piss off."
"I'm serious," he laughs. "Gotta' be a hit to the old ego."
I sigh. "Don't say that. I already feel bad."
"Not bi?"
"Definitely not," I sigh.
"So, like, do you think I'm hot?"
I spit out my coffee. It literally catapults from my mouth and hits the ground. Grant laughs at the horror on my face.
"You did not just ask me that."
"I did," he smirks. "Answer."
"Yeah. I guess you're pretty hot."
"Fuck yeah," he grins. "Would you be into me if I wasn't your best friend?"
I shrug. "That's weird. I don't know."
"You can say yes."
I roll my eyes. "Yes. Probably. Now shut up."
Grant wears a smug look for the rest of the walk. He smirks at me. "You think I'm hot."
"Oh my God," I groan. "Shut up or I'll throw this coffee at you."
He holds his hands up. "Hey, it's not my fault I was born with a killer figure and a gorgeous face."
I shove his arm. "You're unbelievable."
"Unbelievably hot, some might say," he winks, before sauntering in front of me and into the gate of school.
***
My first two classes are ones that Jake isn't in. I first see him in the hallway. My face broke into a smile the moment I saw him – I couldn't control it. He didn't even glance my direction. I don't let it phase me; he probably didn't see me. That's what I'm telling myself anyway because it's too painful to think anything else. Not after this weekend.
I'm starving by the time lunch rolls around. I pluck my paper bag lunch from my locker and head to the cafeteria. Jake is already seated, with the rest of the crew. I'm late, like usual, being held up listening to Katryn's latest Netflix addiction. She's decided to study this lunch, realising that her technique of 'winging it' for assessments is not really panning out for her.
Casually, I slide in next to Jake. My leg bumps his.
"Hey," I say to no one in particular.
Jake moves away from me and I try not to let this bother me.
"S'up Cal," Tommy greets. "Plans for the weekend?"
"Sister is coming home," I reply. "But might be able to hang still, if something good comes up."
"Might be a party in the making, I'll keep you posted," he says with a mouth full of bread.
"Are you doing anything with Haze?" I ask Jake.
He doesn't look up when he shakes his head. "Nup."
"Well, they'll be at my place if you want to come around."
He glances up at me and looks like he half wants to punch me in the face. As if I have just declared to everyone that we have been making out. "Maybe."
"Dude, your sister is banging," Johnno, a guy in the year below us says.
I tilt my head. "Another word about my sister and I'll stick this fork into your eye."
He grins. "You'd have to catch me first."
He jumps to his feet and does a little jump, as if daring me to chase him. I roll my eyes.
"I'm not 12. I'm not going to chase you."
"You're no fun," he pouts and I actually question whether it was a little flirty. Maybe I'm just being paranoid because I've managed to come out to not only my mum, but my best friend in a matter of two days. I half feel like I'm now wearing an I'M GAY sign around my neck.
I look up, to see Grant giving me a suggestive look. I give a deadpan one in return. I seriously hope he doesn't think Johnno is the guy I was talking about. No way in hell.
Jake suddenly gets to his feet, looking seriously pissed off. Without a word, he stalks from the cafeteria. I stare after him in bewilderment.
I sigh. The Haze brothers. Always like to confuse the fuck out of anyone they're involved with.
This is going to be a long journey.