A Way To Your Heart - Chapter 40: Chapter 40

"Stop smiling at your phone. Are you here to text with your husband or to hang out with us?"
Jimin snickered when Yoonji frowned at Taehyung who quickly kept his phone away with a silly smile.
"I can't believe you really bought him turtleneck shirt just because of that," Yoonji shook her head in disbelief, placing the plate with chicken nuggets on the bed.
"Ten of them," Jimin added, trying to take a piece from the plate but a smack from Yoonji on his hand with a glare telling him to wait stopped him.
"So what?" Taehyung rolled his eyes.
He can't believe his friends laughed when he told them about buying the shirts for Jungkook.
"I don't know but now, I really want to see him wearing it. I'm sure he'll look hot in a turtleneck. I might fall for him again if I see him now," Yoonji said and winked at Jimin to tease their friend who just rolled his eyes at them.
"You should've gone to the company when your dad told you to go if you want to see him. He wore one of them today. Too bad your brother went there instead," Taehyung sure was trying to act like he doesn't care but a part of him still felt a kind of relief that Yoonji is with him instead of going to the company, eventhough he knew she was just teasing him and wouldn't cross the line with Jungkook.
He's just selfish and possessive towards Jungkook, isn't he? But what to do, he can't just help it.
"I can go now if I want to, but some dumbo here might get jealous, y'know."
Jimin just laughed when the two start hitting each other and put a piece of the nugget in his mouth. He's so used to their little fights to care, it's just their usual selves anyway, chicken is more important for him right now.
"Why? Are you scared I might take him from yo--" Yoonji paused when she saw Jimin munching carelessly on his own, "hey?! I told you to wait."
"You both keep on fighting with the food in front of me. What do you expect? I'm hungry."
"So you took the chance and stole it?"
"What? It's for us to eat. I just took a piece, not stealing, ok?"
"But I told you to wait."
Taehyung just laughed looking at the two bickering. It's either with him or the other two to fight for the silliest reasons, and it's never a serious one, but yeah, just once when he fought with Jimin.
And when he think about it, among the silly reasons of their fights, the reason for that one serious fight was the silliest, misunderstanding.
But he's glad they're back to what they used to be, hoping for three of them to stay the same.
"Alright, both of you, continue fighting. I'll eat all of these," he picked up the plate and that's when the two stopped their bickering to take the plate from him.
The day went well, watching some movies together, eating and chatting about randoms things. They just love being with each other.
"Yoonji-ah."
"Hmm?" Yoonji hummed and turned when Taehyung suddenly called out her name.
Jimin has gone to his cafe after getting a call saying he'll be back soon, so it's only the two of them in the room now.
"I haven't tell you this yet but, Jimin and I, we had a fight before you came back."
Yoonji paused for a bit before chuckling, "what's new there? You two always fight tho."
"No, it's not same. We, we fought for real. I even cried after that."
Yoonji got up to sit properly when Taehyung's voice got serious, "Really? When? But why?"
Taehyung almost cried again when he tell the story to her. He shouldn't bring this up again, but he just wanted to let it out, he felt sorry for everything, sorry for not knowing the story behind why Jimin was hurt, sorry for not being a part of his pain during that time.
Yoonji just quietly listened to everything he said, until she face palmed herself. "Wait, everything feel so messed up now."
"What do you mean?" Taehyung frowned when she got up from the bed and start walking to and fro.
"I feel like I'm the reason of all these."
"You were not even here when we fought. How is it your fault?"
Yoonji paused her feet and turned towards Taehyung.
"It's not about your fight with him. It's about them. I get it, I get it now."
"Will you tell me what's going on? What do you mean them?"
"So, tell me, Jimin really thought my brother don't like him?"
Taehyung paused, "why would you bring up your brother here? Of course he would think that way after what he did to him? That's why he was so hurt. He still is."
"Tsk, there goes the wrong way."
"What do you mean? Are you telling me your brother likes him?"
Yoonji sighed as she sat down on the bed again, "that day, after you went home, I took Jimin here with me. My brother had a competition the next day so I wanted him to meet my brother. My brother always liked Jimin to encourage him."
She put on a faint smile on her lips as she continued, "my brother, he used to have social anxiety when he was in school. He couldn't even go up to stage to perform. But he used to tell me about a boy he saw looking at him everyday while he was playing piano in school. And he told me he wants to improve just to play for that boy. But I never knew the boy he was talking about was Jimin until I brought him here after school for the first time to hang out with me."
Taehyung felt goosebumps. So there's more to this which he never knew? No, he never imagined this would be that deep for the both sides.
"After I found out the boy was Jimin, I always wanted them to be together. Jimin was the reason my brother could finally get over with his weakness and my brother was Jimin's happiness. And I believed they'll be each other's strength, yeah, they used to be, and I can feel they still are," Yoonji sighed, fidgeting her fingers.
"That day, my brother was so happy when I told him I would bring Jimin, he always knew the way Jimin feel about him, and I was so excited when he told me he'll confess him after he win the competition."
Taehyung was so surprised and confused with the story, confused because it's so different from what he heard from Jimin and surprised because he thought Yoongi never knew how Jimin felt for him. That's what Jimin told him, and it's probably what Jimin still think too.
So, it's not what they thought they knew all this time but the other way around? Then why did Yoongi rejected Jimin that time if he knew Jimin's feelings? There must be something both Jimin and him didn't know and he can only wait and listen the rest of what Yoonji has to tell, maybe she knows it?
"My brother, he's a total coward and also a stupid. He would never show his feelings, and Jimin would always be hesitant to tell him how he feel. That was the only problem between them. But that day, I didn't know what happened after Jimin went to my brother's practice room until you told me he kissed my brother and got rejected. That makes sense now why my brother said he did something he shouldn't do. He didn't tell me what exactly happened between them but he said he did something to see his reaction but it gone really bad."
Taehyung frowned, "that doesn't make sense at all. Why would he do something like that just to see his reaction? I'm sorry but it's wrong to break someone's heart like that. Even if he did, why didn't he go after him to explain?"
"I know, I know it's wrong and it's his fault, but he did try to go after him. I saw Jimin running away from our house and I followed my brother when he ran after him, but my dad just came back at that time and he asked us to sit to talk about something. I surely noticed the uneasiness my brother showed in his eyes while listening to dad, but that was when dad told him to go abroad and me to live with my granny."
Taehyung gasped at that, everything started to make more sense to where did all their misunderstanding start.
"For me, I always wanted to go and meet my granny, so I was so excited when dad told me to live with her, but my brother was never willing to go, still he didn't have any choice but to go when we found out dad was facing some problems with the investors and he didn't want us to suffer. I tried to contact Jimin after that, but I couldn't get in touch with him. I asked my brother about what happened but all he said was only that he did something bad. He kept saying Jimin probably won't like him anymore because of his mistake. And I blamed him for being a coward, for not telling him how he feel sooner, and for doing whatever the mistake he was talking about, because I knew Jimin wouldn't be the one at fault in any situation. I trust my best friend."
Yoonji sighed again as she grab the pillow beside her to hug it, "I never thought that day would make their situation as awkward as of now. I should've been the one to clear up their misunderstandings before it's too late. I don't even know what to do with them now. They do seem to still have their feelings towards each other, but they look so awkward whenever they meet. You can see how he tried to refuse coming here even today, he agreed only after I told him my brother is not home."
Taehyung stayed quiet, he still remember how Jimin told him he would try to move on and was even willing to stay only as a brother if he could spend time with Yoongi. But he understood how the elder must've still affect him, how must it be hard for him to forget the reason of his happiness and his first love, of course.
"Yoonji-ah, just tell me one thing clearly. Do you think Yoongi hyung still like Jimin?" He asked, seriousness showing in his voice.
He's done watching his best friend getting hurt for a long time, all because of some misunderstanding. And now, when he finally understood how love makes him happy, how loving Jungkook make him feel, he just wished if he can make his best friend happy by bringing his happiness back to him.
"Of course, he still like him. I still remember how happy he was to see Jimin here again. He wants to make up with him, but he... he's doubting if Jimin might not feel the same anymore like he used to. Guess he's still a coward."
After quietly sitting for a few seconds, "What if we plan something to bring them together so they can sort out their misunderstandings?" Taehyung turned to the other who smiled, she seemed to like the idea.
"It's possible. If we bring them together, they can talk it out."
"Ok, then, let's do it. But if your brother makes my Minnie cry again, I'll--"
"We'll throw him in a well and kill him."
Taehyung paused when Yoonji finished his sentence with a straight face, "wait, isn't that too harsh for your own brother?"
"So what? If he can't even make the one he loves happy, we should--"
"You both don't need to do anything."
Yoonji and Taehyung froze when they heard Jimin's voice from the door. They snapped their heads to see Jimin standing by the door with a faint smile.
"Jiminie, when did you come?" Taehyung got down from the bed, rushing towards Jimin who just smiled at him.
"I'm sorry, I didn't expect to take much long but there was a long queue in the cafe. I couldn't just leave them, y'know."
The two looked at Jimin who just laughed off trying to change the atmosphere, they figured he must've heard what they were talking about. He's always like that, trying to act like he doesn't care much eventhough he does by laughing off at the matter.
"Why are you guys looking at me like that?" Jimin placed the drinks he brought on Yoonji's table before sitting on the bed with them.
"We're just sorry that we talked about you when you're not here," Yoonji crawled a bit closer towards Jimin, "and, I'm sorry for not being by your side that time, and also for my brother. But I swear he've always liked you from the beginning, he still do. You--"
"Yoonji-ah, I didn't hear everything, I just came, but I did hear something I should know at least," Jimin smiled faintly, "but don't worry about it, you don't need to plan anything for us, because I already decided to move on."
"Jiminie, but--"
"I'm happy to be honest, even if it's this late, I'm happy to know it wasn't only me to feel that way. I felt like a fool to like someone who only think of me as his brother, I felt like a weirdo for trying to kiss a man when I'm a man myself. But at least now I know it wasn't one sided, at least I know I was liked by the one I thought to hate me. I'm just... satisfied to know I was someone special to him."
Yoonji knew the silly smile Jimin wore while saying that was just a shield to hide his hurtful tears trying so hard to escape from his eyes.
"I'm happy that he still like me, but it's too late, Yoonji. I know you both want me to be happy, and I'm happy now. I have you all with me, your love enough for me to be happy. And I'm sure I'll be happy even without hyung's love, I've always lived without it for so long anyway."
Jimin smiled when his best friends hug him, a drop of tear rolled down when they rubbed his back.
He was so young back then, letting his feelings lure him with no idea about the world he's living. But now, he knows how different their lives are and how difficult it would be to collide together again. He still likes Yoongi, eventhough he said he would move on, his feelings still stayed the same, no, maybe more, but he didn't want to bother him anymore.
It's not like they were together before, it's not like he has recieved the elder's love before, but in fact, with the time being, he've learned to live without him. That's why when he know the elder have always love him, he felt so relieved, that he can continue living with the thought that his feelings wasn't a foolish thing but something special at least.
"It's alright Jiminie, we'll support whatever you do."
Their hug was warm, the rubs on his back was gentle and soothing, and yeah, he's happy.
Love makes a person happy, but it's not always about the romantic love one receive from a partner, it can be different forms of love to give you happiness. The kind of love from a lover can make one's heart flutter, it might make one feel like to be in heaven, but sometimes, the love from a trusted friend can also give someone the happiest smile a lover couldn't give.
That's what they learnt that day.
Yoonji waved her hand when her friends left her house, wearing a faint smile. She wanted Jimin to be with her brother, but she can't blame him for his decision, her brother was in fault too.
She was about to go inside her room when she heard her brother's footsteps going upstairs. She didn't even know why she was so pissed off to see her brother's face, it reminded her Jimin's tears and it hurt.
"What are you doing?" Yoongi asked when his sister stood in front of him with arms crossed, blocking his way suddenly.
She even found her brother's voice annoying at the moment, "I should be the one to ask you. Oppa, what are you really doing?"
"Yoonji-ah, I'm tired, ok? I'm not in the mood to play around with you."
"Do I look like I'm trying to play around with you?" Yoonji yelled when her brother tried to walk away, her voice cracking a bit.
"Hey? What's wrong? Did you-- You cried? What happened?" Yoongi dropped his bag to lift his sister's face when he noticed her red eyes.
Yoonji wanted to yell louder at her brother but couldn't. She know her brother can act tough and cold but he can never see her crying. "Jiminie... why did you do that him, why?"
Yoongi paused when she mention the name, he dropped his hand from her face and looked away.
"Oppa, you said you like him, right? Then why did you hurt him? Do you know how hurt he might be when you pushed him away? Why don't you just tell him how you feel even when you came back before it's too late? You've got so many chance to tell him. But no, you chose to stay quiet and hurt him with your silence. You're so stupid, oppa. You're still a coward."
Yoonji broke down, the picture of Jimin crying was still playing in her mind. And the way her brother stayed silent even now was pissing her off even more.
"No. I think it's great that Jimin has decided to move on from you. It's much better than getting hurt by you again and again."
Yoongi lift his head up instantly, "w-what?"
"Yeah, he decided to move on. Happy now? He--" she grabbed her brother's arm when he was about to run, "where are you going?"
"To Jimin."
"Why? To hurt him again?"
"No. I have to tell him something."
"Oppa!" Yoonji grabbed his wrist again when he escaped his arm from her hand, "What are you going to tell him? He's trying to be happy without you, please don't hurt him anymore and stay away if you aren't going to make him happy." As much she want them to be together so badly, she wanted her brother to at least respect her friend's decision. She was afraid he would get hurt again.
"I'll be back."
"Oppa! OPPA! Don't go to him, please."
Yoongi heard his sister yelling when he finally escaped from her hand and dashed out of the house. He show her following him till the door when he drove his car until he reach Jimin's cafe.
He got down from the car and walked towards the cafe until he paused his feet in front of the door, never brave enough to open it and greet the person behind the glass, just like everyday.
Yeah, since when he come to know it was Jimin's cafe, he come to this place everyday, and stood there like a fool of some good minutes just to watch Jimin behind the glass until his feet gets numb.
Maybe his sister was right, he's really a coward and a stupid.
A coward, because eventhough he saw Jimin watching him play piano, he wasn't brave enough to open the door and greet him to say how the boy helped him get over his fear.
A stupid, for thinking the boy would still be there to look at him.
Never thought his stupidity would create an even more worst fear for him, losing Jimin.
Would it be different if opened the door and thank the boy?
Would it be different if he didn't push him away?
Would it be different if he was a little more braver to tell how he feels?
The cafe wasn't busy since it was already late, the wind was getting colder, his hands getting numb from the cold.
He hated himself for not even pushing the door handle harder to open it. He saw a girl opening the door he had been hesitating to, and Jimin smiling at the girl while taking her order. How he wished he was just a casual customer, it would have been more easier for him to open the door, and Jimin would've greeted him with a smile like he did to others.
"Hyung?"
The voice, it's always sweet when that voice called him. But is he hearing things now? Because there's no way Jimin would call him, he's busy serving his customers.
"Hyung? Yoongi hyung?"
It's more clearer this time, so he lift his head up, just to see Jimin in his brown cafe apron looking at him.
"Hyung? Why are you sitting there?"
He could tell the concern in the younger's voice. But when did he sit on the floor? Maybe the little alcohol he drank after the meeting was reacting with the cold weather, or maybe the cold wind froze all his strength to even stand further.
"Hyung? Are you... are you alright? You should go home and rest hyung. It's so cold out here."
He wanted to hear the voice more, but it became inaudible. He wanted to look at the concerned face trying to wake him up, but his vision became blurry until everything around him turned black.
It was still dark when he finally opened his eyes, it would've been more darker if it wasn't for the moonlight peeking through the window curtains, and that's when he realized he was already in his room.
When and how is he in his room? The last thing he remember was in Jimin's cafe-- So... he failed to tell him again? He lost his chance to tell him how he feels again?
He didn't even drink much, he wasn't even drunk when he went there, but why did he had to faint at that moment? Was he that weak that he couldn't even withstand the cold?
He let out a deep sigh as he try to get up but, something like a soft strains of hair touched his hand.
"Ji-Jimin?"
He couldn't even believe Jimin was really in his room, sitting on a chair and sleeping with his head over the edge of the bed. It's not a dream right?
"Jimin?" He whisper called the younger again who opened his eyes slowly.
"Hyung? Are you awake? Are you alright? Do you still feel cold? Do you need me to call the doctor again? Should I go wake Yoonji up? She might be sleeping--"
"Jimin-ah," he held the younger's hand before he get up from his chair, "I'm alright. Just don't go."
And that was enough for the other to calm down a bit.
"Why were you in front of my cafe, hyung? It was so cold out there, what if something worst happened to you? Do you know how scared I was today? Your body was so cold and you weren't answering when I called your name. I was so scared. I was--"
"Jimin-ah, I'm alright now. Please calm down," Yoongi got up when the younger start crying and wrapped him in his arms.
"Why would you come there if you're just going to stand in front everyday? Why, hyung? It hurts to see you standing in cold everyday."
Yoongi paused, so Jimin knew he go there everyday? He loosen his arms, "You... you knew?"
Jimin hung his head down, it's true he knew the older come to his cafe everyday. At first, he just tried to ignore, but ended up expecting the other to show up everyday. But he wanted to move on, move on from the feeling that'll never return. So he chose to ignore him all this time. But today, after hearing from Yoonji, when one of his staff told him about a man sitting in front of his cafe, he instantly knew who it would be. He still wanted to ignore him but when his staff said the man looked sick, nothing could stop him from opening the door to check on him.
Maybe he wasn't ready to move on as much as he want to, because the way he panicked when the older faint in his arms, he couldn't think of anything else but to get scared, scared if something happened to him.
"Why wouldn't I know? You were there everyday. I... I'm sorry hyung, I'm sorry I didn't go to see you when you came even if I knew. I feel like I'm the reason you got sick."
Yoongi looked at Jimin with a faint smile, "No, Jimin. I should be the one to say it. I'm sorry I acted like I didn't notice you when you came to see me playing piano in school even if I knew."
Jimin widen his eyes, lifting his head up to look at the elder. He heard only half of what Taehyung and Yoonji was talking, all he knew was that Yoongi liked him too. But he never knew the elder know about how he used to watch him.
"Maybe it's my punishment for whatever I did to you, I was doing the same thing you did years ago, watching you from afar, just like you did," Yoongi held the younger's hand gently, "Jimin-ah, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for pushing you away when I should've hold you closer. I'm sorry I was a coward for not telling you how I feel. I know it's embarrassing to say this now but, will you give me a chance to make up for everything with you? I promised I'll make you ha--"
"Hyung," Jimin cut the other off, "please don't promise me anything," he somehow could already figured what the other was trying to say.
"About the chance you asked, I almost throw away every chance I kept in myself just to give you all of them, they were starting to scatter around, my hopes were falling apart. I don't know how much time it'll take me if I have to gather them all. So you don't have to promise me anything, hyung, and I won't promise you anything either, because none of us know where this will go and where it'll take us."
Yoongi tightened his grip on thr younger's hand, "We'll figure it out on our way together. You can take as much time as you want to gather your scattering pieces, it's fine for me even if it's not all the pieces, a few pieces of the chances will be enough for me to prove my heart to you. You just have to keep a bit of trust for me, and I'll make your trust for me worth it by making you happy. Just... just don't try to stay away from me."
A drop of tear rolled down from Jimin's eyes, this wasn't included in his plan of moving on from the elder, but when Yoongi wiped his tears away gently from his eyes, he just wanted to gather back all his hopes once again.
He know it can hurt him, and it'll not be an easy path either, but he chose to take this path, because the path of moving on seemed even more darker without the elder.
Yoonji covered her mouth, trying not to make the sound of her crying by the door. She came to check on her brother but ended up hearing them instead, and she couldn't stop. She was scared if the two will tear apart, but now, she's happy, and relieved, wishing the two of her precious people would stay happy again.
She smiled, wiping her tears before quietly walked away without bothering them.