affectionate - Chapter 8: Chapter 8
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FALLON
Christmas was nearing and with it came the small town holiday cheer that I always enjoyed. The town square was filled with red, green, and gold decorations. Storefronts had wreaths hung on the fronts of their doors and cute candy canes painted on their windows along with Christmas movie characters like Frosty the snowman or Rudolf. Fairy lights were strung all throughout the streets and twinkled brightly as soon as the sun and blue sky went their separate ways and made room for the night. A tree stood tall in the middle of town and it was decked head to toe with sparkly ornaments and a big glistening star. The smell of evergreen, cinnamon, and baked goods danced through the air at what seemed like all times during the day. These days, I opted for walking to school as opposed to taking my car just so I could breathe in the delicious aromas and take in the festive decorations.
I loved Christmas. It was the only time my family actually felt like a family and being around them felt warm and real. We always decorated our house too, the front would be plastered with lights and inside a fluffy evergreen tree would be posted up in the living room drenched in homemade decorations from my youth and tinsel. The banister on the stairs would be wrapped in evergreen garlands and the house forever smelled like cinnamon, cranberries, and oranges.
It was still like this, my mother made it her mission to decorate and bring in the holiday spirit with open arms every year. That would never change. However, gone was the overwhelming surge of affection that I felt in my bones when I spent time with my family this year.
Classes were over for the time being, the winter semester of my last year was over and I could only pray that I passed my exams with flying colors. Work was as slow as ever and probably wouldn't pick up again until new year's when everyone was going to parties and needed cheap liquor and snacks. That led to the store closing early during the week and me getting my hours cut. Under different circumstances I would've been ecstatic. Less time at work and more time at home to indulge in my silly hobbies. However, ever since that conversation I begrudgingly had with my parents, the tension inside my house was almost unbearable. I walked on eggshells around my father and tried not to breathe too much around him. It was unsettling knowing that he could basically smell everything and everywhere I went. Nothing I did went unnoticed and I wondered for how long he had been doing this.
My mother, strangely enough, was avoiding me. It should've been the other way around but it wasn't. If anything, I tried to seek her out as much as possible. I needed more answers and I knew they weren't telling me the whole truth, only the parts that they felt were important for me to know. I wanted to talk to her, but she was crumbling under her guilt for lying and spelling me, another fact that uncovered itself. I was a bit hurt when I realized that the gentle touch to my hand was not for comfort, but to keep me sedated through a spell, one that made it impossible for me to move or speak. I also realized that she spelled me asleep that night in my room as well. I was over it, all of it. But my mother was not and it was putting a strain on our already rickety relationship.
With my mother on the brink of self deprecating tears every five seconds and my father believing that our problems were solved and there was nothing to be discussed, I, oddly enough, had the freedom that a twenty year old woman should have. My parents weren't breathing down my neck and I'd be stupid not to use this to my advantage.
I was at home but dinner wasn't for another couple of hours so I decided to take a nature walk. It was cold but I didn't mind it so much anymore and the woods were perfect this time of the year since the brush was so bare and dead. There was a perfect little trail near the college that I walked all the time during the summer but stopped because school was getting serious and then it got cold and I needed time to adjust to it. I was wearing thin leggings that were hidden underneath a thick pair of blue jeans. Two pairs of socks were pulled snug over my feet along with an old pair of converse. My black puffer hugged my body and a woolen scarf snaked around my neck. White earmuffs covered my ears but I was debating on taking them off because they were messing with my earrings and irritating my ears. The thought was tempting but the gust of cold wind that hit me as soon as I opened the front door quickly changed my mind.
I stepped out and immediately started my journey to the trail, I was glad it wasn't too far of a walk and before I knew it I was in the woods admiring the nakedness of nature. Birds swooped to and fro to different trees while singing their songs. What was left of the leaves on a few trees swayed in the bitter wind and created a soft sound that I found extremely comforting. With everything that had been going on in my life lately, this was the most at peace I had felt in a while. But of course, nothing in my life could ever just be and something always had to happen to ruin whatever solace I thought I found.
I was only fifteen minutes into my walk, not even halfway through with the trail when I felt it. At first, I wasn't sure. It started in my abdomen and I brushed it off as hunger pains since I hadn't had anything to eat since breakfast which was at nine this morning and it was now two in the afternoon. But then I felt my cheek prickle, and I quickly realized that I knew this feeling. It was an unforgettable feeling that I would never grow tired of.
He watched me. And I could feel it. The skin on my neck tingled and a staticky feeling ran down the length of my spine. I had never felt this way before. Scared and excited, but also upset and confused. He made me feel so many things at once and I didn't know how to handle it.
I hadn't seen him in a long time. The last time we met, he revealed that he knew I felt something when he touched me which was very embarrassing and I hated that he knew that. He also threatened my father and I should've been scared but I wasn't. I felt oddly...protected even though he was a complete stranger to me and did not have the liberty at all to be making threats towards my family like that. The knowledge that he was a vampire didn't scare me that much either but I guessed that was only because I didn't know vampires in the way that my parents did so therefore him being one didn't mean anything to me. I was slightly concerned about the blood drinking part and wondered briefly if he ever thought about drinking mine. The thought sent an unpleasant shiver down my spine.
I heard him before I saw him, in the blink of an eye (literally) he was in front of me and my knees weakened ever so slightly at the sight of him. He looked good. Too good. His hair was a little longer, it sloped down his neck and was just shy of touching the neck line of his t shirt and the waves in it were more pronounced. His eyes were low as they stared at me and the bags under them were a new development and made him look older if that was even possible given the nature of vampires and their immortality.
"Why are you here?" He spoke, his voice, his deep honey voice, glazed over my body and I fought the urge to close my eyes and let myself sink into it. This was dangerous, he was dangerous. There mere sight of him and the sound of his voice was enough to make me weak in my knees. I didn't know his name, his age, or where he came from, but I was more than ready to give myself to him. Dangerous, I thought.
"Taking a walk. Why does it matter to you?" He sighed and closed his eyes, I glanced down at his hands which were balled into fists and instinctively took a step backwards. I didn't think he would hurt me but in the event that he tried to I needed to have some sort of head-start. I wasn't dumb, I knew vampires had special abilities and that was why he could move so fast and probably do other things that I didn't want to know about. My movement made his eyes snap open and he immediately closed the distance between us. Confusion danced in his eyes.
"Didn't I tell you that I wouldn't hurt you?" He sounded hurt but that didn't matter to me, I didn't know him therefore I couldn't trust anything that he said. I didn't owe him that, especially after that stunt he pulled in the alley.
"And how would I know that? I've only met you twice and last time you threatened to hurt my fucking family so who's stopping you from threatening and hurting me?" I was breathing heavily and probably overreacting but I didn't care. I hated how he said things to me, voice dripping with finality, like there was mutual trust between us when there was barely even a solid relationship. He titled his head in response and smirked. I hated when he smirked too.
"What's your name?" He wasn't serious. Couldn't be. After all this time now he wanted my name? I scoffed and backed up again only for him to follow my movements so we were chest to chest again.
"What's my-" I rolled my eyes I couldn't believe he was asking this and more so, I couldn't believe I was actually going to answer. "It's Fallon, why?" He studied me some more before rolling his shoulders and stepping back but even with the space between us it wasn't enough. I still felt completely wrapped up in him. His scent, I didn't notice before, was earthy and smelled like pine and I don't even know what, just knew that it smelled good and I wanted it all over me.
"My name is Lucius, and yes, I did threaten to hurt whoever hurt you but I wasn't aware it someone in your family. I apologize. But I need you to know, Fallon, that I would never hurt you, on purpose at least." The way he said my name, the way it rolled off his tongue all natural and smooth, like my name was the only thing his mouth was ever meant to say, had me closing my eyes despite using my best efforts to keep them open. Was it smart to close your eyes around a vampire? Probably not. Did I care? At this particular moment in time I did not.
"Why?" I breathed, my eyes were still closed but I felt him close the distance between us again, felt his hand creep up and caress my cheek. I breathed out again shakily, my breath hitting his wrist. I opened my eyes and unconsciously leaned into his touch trying my hardest to soak up the energy being transferred into my body.
"You know why." Suddenly it occurred to me that I didn't care what he was, I didn't care that I was told by my parents to stay away from him, I didn't care that I was supposed to be rejecting him, whatever the hell that meant. I didn't care about anything except his mind numbing touch on my cheek the way my name sounded when he said it. To my greatest dismay, he removed his hand and stepped back, a whine, a fucking whine, caught itself in my throat and my shoulders sagged in disappointment. I knew Lucius, it was so nice to finally put a name to his face, saw this but I didn't care. He could ask his questions later.
"Go home, Fallon. I would like to speak with you but I will save it for another time." My eyes widened and my heart picked up in speed. We've been here before, he was going to leave and I would be left alone for weeks on end wondering when I would see him again. I had so many new questions and I knew he could answer them, I wasn't going to let this opportunity go to waste. Also, I was sure his smell was all over me and I didn't know what to do about that, if I went home now, all hell would break loose and I didn't feel like dealing with that right now.
"I can't go home right now even if I wanted to. I don't know if it's smart to tell you this but I've been "forbidden" from seeing you, something about soulmates and vampires and rejecting you, I don't know. But my father can smell things on me and if he smells you on me I might get hurt again and the last thing I need is you two meeting." I was stretching the truth a little bit. I didn't know if my father was actually going to hurt me but there would definitely be screaming and yelling. Lucius's face was unreadable and it kind of scared me that I never knew what he was thinking about.
"You don't know anything about yourself, do you?" His voice was no louder than a whisper and I deduced that he was shocked. I shook my head and stuffed my hands in my jacket pockets, I realized that we had been standing out here for a while and the temperature was doing nothing but dropping and my hands were suffering the consequences of me not looking for my gloves. Lucius noticed this before bringing his pointer finger and thumb to the bridge of his nose and pinching it. I rolled on the balls of my feet as I waited for him to say whatever it was that he was thinking.
"Follow me, I have a cottage not too far from here where you can shower. We can talk once you're done, I had no idea you were so clueless about everything." I bristled slightly at him calling me clueless but followed him through the woods nonetheless. This was a bad idea but it was the only option I had right now. I would have to stop by the store on my way home and pick up a few things so I wouldn't cause any suspicion as to why I was gone for so long.
"And Fallon?" At this rate, I was going to explode, he had to stop saying my name like that.
"Yes?"
"You're safe with me so stop looking so damn scared all the time." I scowled but kept following him. If he didn't make me feel the way I did around him, then I would probably hate him.
Christmas was nearing and with it came the small town holiday cheer that I always enjoyed. The town square was filled with red, green, and gold decorations. Storefronts had wreaths hung on the fronts of their doors and cute candy canes painted on their windows along with Christmas movie characters like Frosty the snowman or Rudolf. Fairy lights were strung all throughout the streets and twinkled brightly as soon as the sun and blue sky went their separate ways and made room for the night. A tree stood tall in the middle of town and it was decked head to toe with sparkly ornaments and a big glistening star. The smell of evergreen, cinnamon, and baked goods danced through the air at what seemed like all times during the day. These days, I opted for walking to school as opposed to taking my car just so I could breathe in the delicious aromas and take in the festive decorations.
I loved Christmas. It was the only time my family actually felt like a family and being around them felt warm and real. We always decorated our house too, the front would be plastered with lights and inside a fluffy evergreen tree would be posted up in the living room drenched in homemade decorations from my youth and tinsel. The banister on the stairs would be wrapped in evergreen garlands and the house forever smelled like cinnamon, cranberries, and oranges.
It was still like this, my mother made it her mission to decorate and bring in the holiday spirit with open arms every year. That would never change. However, gone was the overwhelming surge of affection that I felt in my bones when I spent time with my family this year.
Classes were over for the time being, the winter semester of my last year was over and I could only pray that I passed my exams with flying colors. Work was as slow as ever and probably wouldn't pick up again until new year's when everyone was going to parties and needed cheap liquor and snacks. That led to the store closing early during the week and me getting my hours cut. Under different circumstances I would've been ecstatic. Less time at work and more time at home to indulge in my silly hobbies. However, ever since that conversation I begrudgingly had with my parents, the tension inside my house was almost unbearable. I walked on eggshells around my father and tried not to breathe too much around him. It was unsettling knowing that he could basically smell everything and everywhere I went. Nothing I did went unnoticed and I wondered for how long he had been doing this.
My mother, strangely enough, was avoiding me. It should've been the other way around but it wasn't. If anything, I tried to seek her out as much as possible. I needed more answers and I knew they weren't telling me the whole truth, only the parts that they felt were important for me to know. I wanted to talk to her, but she was crumbling under her guilt for lying and spelling me, another fact that uncovered itself. I was a bit hurt when I realized that the gentle touch to my hand was not for comfort, but to keep me sedated through a spell, one that made it impossible for me to move or speak. I also realized that she spelled me asleep that night in my room as well. I was over it, all of it. But my mother was not and it was putting a strain on our already rickety relationship.
With my mother on the brink of self deprecating tears every five seconds and my father believing that our problems were solved and there was nothing to be discussed, I, oddly enough, had the freedom that a twenty year old woman should have. My parents weren't breathing down my neck and I'd be stupid not to use this to my advantage.
I was at home but dinner wasn't for another couple of hours so I decided to take a nature walk. It was cold but I didn't mind it so much anymore and the woods were perfect this time of the year since the brush was so bare and dead. There was a perfect little trail near the college that I walked all the time during the summer but stopped because school was getting serious and then it got cold and I needed time to adjust to it. I was wearing thin leggings that were hidden underneath a thick pair of blue jeans. Two pairs of socks were pulled snug over my feet along with an old pair of converse. My black puffer hugged my body and a woolen scarf snaked around my neck. White earmuffs covered my ears but I was debating on taking them off because they were messing with my earrings and irritating my ears. The thought was tempting but the gust of cold wind that hit me as soon as I opened the front door quickly changed my mind.
I stepped out and immediately started my journey to the trail, I was glad it wasn't too far of a walk and before I knew it I was in the woods admiring the nakedness of nature. Birds swooped to and fro to different trees while singing their songs. What was left of the leaves on a few trees swayed in the bitter wind and created a soft sound that I found extremely comforting. With everything that had been going on in my life lately, this was the most at peace I had felt in a while. But of course, nothing in my life could ever just be and something always had to happen to ruin whatever solace I thought I found.
I was only fifteen minutes into my walk, not even halfway through with the trail when I felt it. At first, I wasn't sure. It started in my abdomen and I brushed it off as hunger pains since I hadn't had anything to eat since breakfast which was at nine this morning and it was now two in the afternoon. But then I felt my cheek prickle, and I quickly realized that I knew this feeling. It was an unforgettable feeling that I would never grow tired of.
He watched me. And I could feel it. The skin on my neck tingled and a staticky feeling ran down the length of my spine. I had never felt this way before. Scared and excited, but also upset and confused. He made me feel so many things at once and I didn't know how to handle it.
I hadn't seen him in a long time. The last time we met, he revealed that he knew I felt something when he touched me which was very embarrassing and I hated that he knew that. He also threatened my father and I should've been scared but I wasn't. I felt oddly...protected even though he was a complete stranger to me and did not have the liberty at all to be making threats towards my family like that. The knowledge that he was a vampire didn't scare me that much either but I guessed that was only because I didn't know vampires in the way that my parents did so therefore him being one didn't mean anything to me. I was slightly concerned about the blood drinking part and wondered briefly if he ever thought about drinking mine. The thought sent an unpleasant shiver down my spine.
I heard him before I saw him, in the blink of an eye (literally) he was in front of me and my knees weakened ever so slightly at the sight of him. He looked good. Too good. His hair was a little longer, it sloped down his neck and was just shy of touching the neck line of his t shirt and the waves in it were more pronounced. His eyes were low as they stared at me and the bags under them were a new development and made him look older if that was even possible given the nature of vampires and their immortality.
"Why are you here?" He spoke, his voice, his deep honey voice, glazed over my body and I fought the urge to close my eyes and let myself sink into it. This was dangerous, he was dangerous. There mere sight of him and the sound of his voice was enough to make me weak in my knees. I didn't know his name, his age, or where he came from, but I was more than ready to give myself to him. Dangerous, I thought.
"Taking a walk. Why does it matter to you?" He sighed and closed his eyes, I glanced down at his hands which were balled into fists and instinctively took a step backwards. I didn't think he would hurt me but in the event that he tried to I needed to have some sort of head-start. I wasn't dumb, I knew vampires had special abilities and that was why he could move so fast and probably do other things that I didn't want to know about. My movement made his eyes snap open and he immediately closed the distance between us. Confusion danced in his eyes.
"Didn't I tell you that I wouldn't hurt you?" He sounded hurt but that didn't matter to me, I didn't know him therefore I couldn't trust anything that he said. I didn't owe him that, especially after that stunt he pulled in the alley.
"And how would I know that? I've only met you twice and last time you threatened to hurt my fucking family so who's stopping you from threatening and hurting me?" I was breathing heavily and probably overreacting but I didn't care. I hated how he said things to me, voice dripping with finality, like there was mutual trust between us when there was barely even a solid relationship. He titled his head in response and smirked. I hated when he smirked too.
"What's your name?" He wasn't serious. Couldn't be. After all this time now he wanted my name? I scoffed and backed up again only for him to follow my movements so we were chest to chest again.
"What's my-" I rolled my eyes I couldn't believe he was asking this and more so, I couldn't believe I was actually going to answer. "It's Fallon, why?" He studied me some more before rolling his shoulders and stepping back but even with the space between us it wasn't enough. I still felt completely wrapped up in him. His scent, I didn't notice before, was earthy and smelled like pine and I don't even know what, just knew that it smelled good and I wanted it all over me.
"My name is Lucius, and yes, I did threaten to hurt whoever hurt you but I wasn't aware it someone in your family. I apologize. But I need you to know, Fallon, that I would never hurt you, on purpose at least." The way he said my name, the way it rolled off his tongue all natural and smooth, like my name was the only thing his mouth was ever meant to say, had me closing my eyes despite using my best efforts to keep them open. Was it smart to close your eyes around a vampire? Probably not. Did I care? At this particular moment in time I did not.
"Why?" I breathed, my eyes were still closed but I felt him close the distance between us again, felt his hand creep up and caress my cheek. I breathed out again shakily, my breath hitting his wrist. I opened my eyes and unconsciously leaned into his touch trying my hardest to soak up the energy being transferred into my body.
"You know why." Suddenly it occurred to me that I didn't care what he was, I didn't care that I was told by my parents to stay away from him, I didn't care that I was supposed to be rejecting him, whatever the hell that meant. I didn't care about anything except his mind numbing touch on my cheek the way my name sounded when he said it. To my greatest dismay, he removed his hand and stepped back, a whine, a fucking whine, caught itself in my throat and my shoulders sagged in disappointment. I knew Lucius, it was so nice to finally put a name to his face, saw this but I didn't care. He could ask his questions later.
"Go home, Fallon. I would like to speak with you but I will save it for another time." My eyes widened and my heart picked up in speed. We've been here before, he was going to leave and I would be left alone for weeks on end wondering when I would see him again. I had so many new questions and I knew he could answer them, I wasn't going to let this opportunity go to waste. Also, I was sure his smell was all over me and I didn't know what to do about that, if I went home now, all hell would break loose and I didn't feel like dealing with that right now.
"I can't go home right now even if I wanted to. I don't know if it's smart to tell you this but I've been "forbidden" from seeing you, something about soulmates and vampires and rejecting you, I don't know. But my father can smell things on me and if he smells you on me I might get hurt again and the last thing I need is you two meeting." I was stretching the truth a little bit. I didn't know if my father was actually going to hurt me but there would definitely be screaming and yelling. Lucius's face was unreadable and it kind of scared me that I never knew what he was thinking about.
"You don't know anything about yourself, do you?" His voice was no louder than a whisper and I deduced that he was shocked. I shook my head and stuffed my hands in my jacket pockets, I realized that we had been standing out here for a while and the temperature was doing nothing but dropping and my hands were suffering the consequences of me not looking for my gloves. Lucius noticed this before bringing his pointer finger and thumb to the bridge of his nose and pinching it. I rolled on the balls of my feet as I waited for him to say whatever it was that he was thinking.
"Follow me, I have a cottage not too far from here where you can shower. We can talk once you're done, I had no idea you were so clueless about everything." I bristled slightly at him calling me clueless but followed him through the woods nonetheless. This was a bad idea but it was the only option I had right now. I would have to stop by the store on my way home and pick up a few things so I wouldn't cause any suspicion as to why I was gone for so long.
"And Fallon?" At this rate, I was going to explode, he had to stop saying my name like that.
"Yes?"
"You're safe with me so stop looking so damn scared all the time." I scowled but kept following him. If he didn't make me feel the way I did around him, then I would probably hate him.
End of affectionate Chapter 8. Continue reading Chapter 9 or return to affectionate book page.