All is Found - Chapter 3: Chapter 3

Tonight wasn't as cold as last night but it's still January in Massachusetts. The wind whipped around my hair as I took a seat on the cold concrete. I was lucky it hasn't snowed yet which would make the ground even colder. Sighing I put my feet through the slots of the railing and pulled Thea's coat closer to my body.
I rested my gloved hands on the bars and looks at the black nothingness below me. Hitting the water from the this high would definitely hurt me but I don't think it would have killed me. Maybe if I hit from the right angle. Even if I did hit the water and survive, the cold water temperature would kill me. That can't be the best way to go, the waiting in the cold would be painful. I want it to be quick and painless. I don't want to suffer.
I could hear a car approaching the bridge but I didn't move. I'm hoping the person will just continue to drive and not notice me. But when would I ever have luck on my side, never. The car's engine stopped and I could hear the sound of the car door slam shut. I put my head in my hands and sighed. I guess I can never have some time alone anymore.
Footsteps got louder as the person got closer to me. I pulled my head from my hands and looked up to see Thea standing next to me.
"How long have you been out here?" Thea asked and rested against the railing.
"A while." I said and found her blue eyes boring into mine.
"Mind if I sit?" Thea asked.
"It's a free country, be my guest." I said and looked out over the river again.
I heard the thud of Thea sitting down next to me. When I looked over to her she just rested her back against the railing.
"How was work?" I asked trying not to make the silence awkward.
"Arrested a guy for beating his girlfriend, had to write up a lot of paperwork for the black eye he came to the station with." Thea said and flexed her right hand a bit.
"Did it make you feel better?" I asked.
"A little" Thea said and sighed before closing her eyes. "Is this going to be a nightly thing?"
"I don't know yet." I answered.
"You sure you don't want to call anybody?" Thea asked and rolled her head to look at me.
"Yes" I answered and swung my legs through the slots.
"How about we go back to get something to eat? I didn't get to take my meal today because of that prick." Thea asked.
"Sure" I said.
Thea got up off of the ground and wiped some rocks off her pants before offering her hand and helping me up. It took me a second to stand because I had to pull my legs through the slots again. Once I was standing I didn't let go of Thea's hand. She felt like my tether holding me to the ground. Thea didn't mention it as we walked to her waiting truck. She opened the passenger door for me and only once I was seated did she shut the door.
As Thea took off we had to cross over the bridge. I rolled down my window and leaned over the frame as I looked out where I was just sitting. After we got off the bridge I rolled the window back up and really looked at the interior of the truck. The brown leather seats show there age but there aren't many cracks in them. The only modern thing on the truck is a new digital radio that is currently off.
Instead of sitting in silence for the rest of the ride I reach over and hit the on switch. The radio came to life and soft pop music started pumping out of the radio. Thea hit number 2 on the preset buttons and the pop music became classic rock. Only one full song was played as we pulled up to The Laurel Diner. The blue neon sign was the only store front lit in the strip of stores. Thea killed the engine and got out of the truck. I pulled on the handle to open the door but it was stuck.
Thea came to my rescue as she pulled the door open from the outside and held her hand out again for me to take. I took it and hopped out of the passenger seat.
"The door sticks, if you want to open it from the inside you have to put your shoulder into and really push it." Thea said and dropped my hand as she closed the door once I moved out of the way.
I didn't say anything as I followed her into the diner. Thea held the door open for me and I followed her inside. Taking a quick look around the diner the only other people in here are a group of teenagers at the other end of the diner. Thea sat at the other end of the diner and I sat in the side of the booth that wouldn't face them. The last thing I need right now is someone coming over.
Thea gave me a menu that she grabbed from the bar that was unoccupied and settled in the booth across from me. I didn't really need to look at it because I knew what was I going to get. A waitress came over and took our orders a few minutes later before leaving us alone again. The teens at the other end of the diner we quite loud in their conversation but they weren't making a mess.
"You must really like bridges." Thea said as she took her beanie off and scratched her head. Her blonde hair was curling a bit at the ends as she moved her hair over her shoulders.
"When you found me on the bridge yesterday I was really going to do it." I said looking out the window behind her.
"In all my years of being a cop, you were the second suicidal person I was able to save." Thea said as she sipped her water.
"How many came before me?" I asked.
"Five. The other three were already gone by the time we got there." Thea said and sighed.
"But you were able to save another person like me. Do you know where they are now?" I asked curious.
"Yea, he is off in med school now. Every once in a while we would catch up over a cup of coffee. It was my first week out of the academy and I almost didn't catch him in time. He went over the railing just like you did. I was able to talk to him for a few minutes to try and talk him down but he didn't listen and kept looking down at the water. Just as he released his grip I was able to pull him back over the rail." Thea said and took a sip of her water.
"What made you want to be a police officer?" I asked wanting to change the subject.
"I've always wanted to help people and make a difference. I thought about going into the Navy but Allison made me stay. Her and the fact I get seasick really easily." Thea said.
I couldn't help but chuckle at her answer. Our conversation was cut short then with the waitress returning with our food. My pancakes were steaming, just coming off the griddle and Thea barely let the waitress place her plate down before she dove into her burger. I barely got half way through my pancakes when I looked up to see Thea finishing her burger.
"I'm guessing you were really hungry." I said and place another piece of the fluffy pancake in my mouth.
"Like I said, I didn't get to have my meal and I usually take it around 6ish and it's now almost 1am so yea I'm pretty hungry." Thea said and started to attack her French fries.
The rest of our meal was quiet and we just enjoyed each other's company. Being in Thea's presence I felt like I'm finally able to breath for the first time in a long time. She was the breath of fresh air I so badly needed. Once I was done Thea left some cash on the table to cover the tab we stood to leave. As I started to push the door open Thea walked over to the group of teens and flashed her badge. Once she did they quieted down and Thea winked at the waitress who served us.
"I'm guessing this isn't your first time doing that." I said as Thea pulled out of her parking spot.
"No, they are good kids but need to be reminded what time it is and the diner isn't there living room." Thea said and pulled onto the main road.
The drive back to Thea's house was quiet. I didn't try turning on the radio this time as I just leaned against the window and looked up at the stars. When we returned to her house Thea let me in and she locked the door behind us. I hung up the extra coat I found in her closet on the hooks by the door and kicked off my converse before walking over to the couch and wrapped myself in a blanket.
"That couch is going to kill your back if you sleep on it; my bed is big enough for us to share." Thea said and walked into her bedroom.
I sighed and closed my eyes. I don't think it's a good idea for us to sleep next to each other. This woman as already shown me so much kindness I can't do anything to ruin that.
"I promise I don't bite but if you don't want to I'm not going to force you." Thea said as she walked out of her room to walk to the kitchen. She returned a minute later and handed me a water bottle.
"I'm going to stay on the couch thank you for the offer though." I said not wanting to look Thea in the eye.
"Alright, the offer still stands if you change your mind." Thea said and retired to her room.
Once I heard the door shut behind her I crawled into a ball on the couch and sighed. I can't stay here long. I need to make a plan because I can't burden Thea any more then I am now.