Alpha King Xavier - Chapter 61: Chapter 61

I awoke suddenly, with a total sense of doom.
The first thing I noticed was the change in my surroundings. The wall was purple, which was weird because the room I used to stay in has pink walls.
Asides, the location of the bed has also changed.
Then I remembered. How I barricaded myself inside and pulled bed frames, chairs, and tables against the door to create a makeshift fortress. Well, which the Alpha destroyed.
I did not know what I was thinking when I did that, though. And the Alpha did deceive me at first, and I thought I had successfully sealed myself in.
Then I remembered what I did. Actually, everything I did. I still find it difficult to believe I killed someone, someone innocent. Then, I got intimate with the Alpha.
My head felt tight all of a sudden. Someone screamed near me, and the door burst open.
Someone rushed to me, and a distinctive scent filled the air around me. It took me just that time to realise I was the one screaming as I was the only one in the room.
“Are you alright?” Mercury questioned.
I looked up at her and saw the worries on her face.
No, I'm not alright. I'm far from being alright.
I don't believe I got intimate with the Alpha. I don't believe I let myself be used again after promising myself that nothing of such will happen again.
“I'm fine,” I muttered.
She released a sigh of relief. “I will tell the maids to get you cleaned up.”
It was at that moment that I stared at myself and realised I was naked. My cheek flushed with embarrassment.
“How are you here?” I asked suddenly to conceal my shame.
“The Alpha changed his orders. He said I should serve you till you are out of heat.”
I nodded once, then twice. “I will clean myself up.”
“Ok, what would you like to eat?”
I looked up and held her gaze for a few seconds. “Anything,” I said with a smile.
She nodded once, a smile playing on her face as well. Then she rose. “Alright then. I will oversee it while you clean up.”
I nodded once and watched her walk out of the room.
I stood still for what seemed like forever; different thoughts coursed through me in some sort of crazy confusion.
A lot of things were happening to me at the same time. I felt torn and betrayed, and messy and unstable.
I closed my eyes for a moment and felt the tears spill out of my eyes. I felt helpless and lost!
Was there really a way around this?
When I opened my eyes, I was standing in front of the bathroom and staring at the bathtub cubicle.
If I was really destined to wipe out Xavier's existence. Then, why is the moon goddess making everything so hard for me?
I started to fill the bathroom cubicle. Though, with a different thing in mind.
I want to end this thing right now. Once and for all.
Maybe this is my punishment for killing someone.
I stepped inside the bathroom cubicle and laid in it. I closed my eyes and tried to think of something—anything that would be sane about my life.
But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop seeing her face, the maid as she breathed her last, and then Xavier as we fucked.
I've not only failed myself; I've failed my family; I've failed my pack.
But the warm water soon soothed my heart, and I found myself being pulled away by a strong force towards my nightmare. No! I was drowning.
I opened my eyes and looked up. It felt like I was in an ocean, and the tide was pulling me in.
I didn't fight it. I didn't try to get up. No, this was what I wanted.
“No!” A voice screamed suddenly. It seemed far away, or maybe it was coming from my dream. “Autumn!” The voice called. It was deep and familiar.
In the next instant, I was looking up at his handsome face above the water.
My eyes started to close against my wish as I felt darkness hover around me.
Before I lost consciousness nevertheless, I felt a pair of strong arms wrapped around me, pulling me hard against a hard but warm chest.
Consciousness returned to me suddenly, and the first thing I noticed was someone holding me so tight.
“Fuck, Autumn!” The deepness in his voice made my core tighten while his arms pulled me even closer, as if he were scared of me leaving.
“Xavier,” my voice shook slightly.
He pulled back slightly and stared at me. His eyes were soft, and there were hints of tears in them.
I blink once, unsure if I saw it correctly. The Alpha doesn't cry. I wasn't given the chance to check it well when his lips suddenly met mine.
I went rigid. As much as I didn't want it, I couldn't pull back. I shamelessly loved it.
Heck! This is why I don't deserve to live. This is why I should die. This is why I should have died in that bathtub cubicle.
He pulled back suddenly and stared at me. His expression was soft, and his eyes were suddenly sad.
A tear dropped to my cheek, and he wiped it off.
“I'm sorry,” he said suddenly, shocking the heck out of me.
The Alpha has never apologized. I have never heard him apologise. Or have I heard wrong?
“I'm sorry,” he repeated, confirming my surprise. “I'm sorry, Autumn, for accusing you wrongly. I'm sorry for forcing this on you!”
I stared, shocked.
“I'm fucking sorry for everything I have done to you,” he dragged, swallowed harder, and turned away, but his arms were still holding me tight against his chest, supplying me with the heat I needed.
“I'm ashamed of myself, but it's the truth. I'm so sorry for dragging you into this mess. I know my apology is not enough to fix all that I have done. And I don't care!” He said, half yelling. “I will get my head to you on a platter if it's what you want. If it's what will make you feel better,” he muttered and turned to me again.
He locked his gaze with me, and a shiver coursed through my body.
He held me tighter; perhaps he thought I was feeling cold. How could I when he has been supplying me heat endlessly?
“Just don't think of committing suicide. Don't_,” he hesitated briefly. “_kill yourself. Everything is my fault,” he took a deep breath. “I will pay it back with my life when all this is over. I promise,” he repeated in a sad voice.
My heart literally stopped beating.