APRICITY [Completed] - Chapter 11: Chapter 11

I won't let them sell the house. I can't add more things to the endless list of stuff Surbhi wouldn't forgive me for. It means that I have very little time. I either convince her before Anmol Khurana signs the deal or I lose her forever.
She walks into the room in her night suit.
"Your grandpa texted. He's found a buyer for the house," I say while staring in the distance.
I expect her to ignore me like she usually does. But this time, a reply comes.
"I know."
"You still wouldn't hear me out?" I say with a hint of desperation in my voice.
"This had to end someday, Vihaan. You knew it," she says, walking towards the bed.
"Yes, but I expected a different ending," I mumble.
"Move on, Vihaan. Revenge wouldn't take you anywhere."
My head snaps in her direction. Our eyes lock.
"You think I grovelled for 5 months for revenge?" I say, trying very hard to keep my voice under control.
"Then why Vihaan?"
I stand up and walk up to her. I take her hands in mine.
"It's not revenge, Surbhi. That period of my life ended ages ago. Now it's you. Only you. You as a person. You as a friend. You as my wife," I say and hope that she can read the sincerity in my eyes.
"Why? Why me? Why not someone else?"
"Because I love you." The answer leaves my mouth without much thought. I figured out my feelings for her a while ago.
"I don't," she says, her voice carrying an edge to it.
I dare to cup her cheeks with my palms, and thankfully, she doesn't flinch or slap them away.
"I know, baby. I know that I've lost the most precious thing ever gifted to me by God. And ever since I realized my mistake, I have been repenting."
Surbhi takes my hands in hers and slowly removes them from herself.
"Good night, Vihaan," she says and lies on the bed.
I stand there, looking at her sleeping figure for a few seconds.
"Good night," I mumble.
It isn't a good night. It's anything but good. My chest constricts.
Five months. Five months of efforts all go in vain. She still believes I'm using her for revenge.
The first tear falls, then another and another. I stand till I think I can't keep it silent anymore.
I rush to the bathroom and let my tears loose.
"Mom, why aren't you here?"
I'm tired. I'm so tired right now. Why did I have to bear the abuse as a child? Why did my father have to raise me into a reckless man? Why did I have to shut my brain and ruin my only chance at happiness?
I want to end this cycle of sadness. I want to be happy. I want to be carefree. I want to have a wife who loves me and children who'll run around the backyard yelling at the top of their voices.
A small smile appears on my face as I envision the future that is so far away from my reach.
"Vihaan," Surbhi knocks on the door.
"Coming." I quickly splash water on my face and open the door. I walk past her, but she catches my wrist. Goosebumps erupt on my skin at the contact.
I keep my gaze lowered.
"You've been crying," she observes.
The knot in my chest tightens again. I shake my head. I don't trust myself to speak right now.
"Vihaan, look at me," she cups my cheek and my eyes water again.
I want to lean into her touch and soak up her warmth, but I take a step back. She's too good for this world. I won't manipulate her with my tears.
If I can't pull my shit together as an adult, then it's my burden to bear, not hers.
"Come with me," she again grabs my wrist and takes me into the bedroom. We sit on the bed, but I still don't look at her.
Bringing her index finger to my chin, she tilts my face towards her. The look of worry on her face destroys me, and I break.
I break right there and then. I sob like a toddler in her lap while she rubs my back and whispers words of comfort in my ear.
I don't deserve this. I don't deserve her or her kindness. I try to pull away, but she doesn't let me go.
"Talk to me, Vihaan," she urges.
"I tried Surbhi. I knew that I didn't deserve you , nor did you deserve an asshole like me, yet I tried. I tried to be better for you, for your sake. I tried to show you that I'm serious about it because I am."
"I want you in my life, Surbhi. You are the last piece of family I have. I don't want to lose you. I can't see you divorcing me and marrying another man. Because I know that nobody will treat you better than I will."
"I know that my past record says otherwise. But please give me one chance to prove that I'm worthy of you. I'll be your slave. I'll do your bidding for as long as it takes for you to forgive me."
"Punish me, Surbhi. Punish me, torture me, beat me, make me bleed all you want but please don't leave me because I will fucking die."
My tears flow nonstop and so does Surbhi's.
"How many times did I say those words to you in that house? How many times did I beg you to give me one chance," she cries.
"I was an idiot. I've slapped myself mentally so many times for it."
"It's not that I don't want to forgive you. It's just that I can't bring myself to trust you," she admits.
I do the only thing that comes to my mind. I submit to her. I get up, stand in front of her and drop to my knees. I lower my head and fist my hands by my side.
"Vihaan," she says, her words dripping disbelief.
"Do whatever you want to do with me, I'm yours."
This is my last chance to prove to her that I'm serious and I won't let it slip from my fingers.
"Get up Vihaan."
I don't.
"Do it, Surbhi. You know you want to."
"I can't."
"You can."
"But I wouldn't."
"You should."
The echo of the first slap reverberates in the room. My hand itches to reach my cheek and soothe the sting but I keep them fisted by my side. She slaps me again on the other cheek.
Slap
Slap
Slap until she becomes a sobbing mess too. She falls to her knees and throws her arms around me. I pull her closer and provide her with the shoulder to lean on.
And for the first time ever, me and my wife, sleep on the same bed in each other's embrace.