Beats of the Heart - Chapter 23: Chapter 23

Miles glared at the three unaware teenagers eating at his kitchen table. They were supposed to be gone for hours but returned early for dinner and Netflix.
What seemed like the perfect night for Miles and Shawn became another rambunctious event when Danny, Courtney, and Rob came home. They were amped from the game they attended and sitting around the table discussing their next outing.  Miles and Shawn were watching them from the couch in the den.
Rob's excited voice sounded, suggesting something Miles didn't pay attention to.
"Bet," Danny answered Rob with a grin.
Miles leaned closer to Shawn until their arms were pressed against each other. "What the fuck does bet mean? Are they gambling?"
Shawn raised an eyebrow. "You're asking me?"
Miles chuckled. "I feel like I'm a lost cause. Rob said that Danny 'ate that,' but I don't think he was actually eating anything."
Shawn covered his mouth to hide his laugh. "I barely learned what yeet means, and I think that term is already outdated."
"Get this—Danny said something about rizz the other day, and I was so fucking confused. I didn't know if he was talking about a game or a fucking disease. I was way off in my interpretation." Miles groaned. "What happened to perfectly good slang like dope, word, and fresh?"
Shawn hunched over, his shoulders shaking with laughter. He took a steadying breath and gave Miles a grin. "Aren't you in the music world? Shouldn't you know about these terms?"
"You're in the same world, asshole." Miles huffed. "I'm limping along while trying to translate modern English with Urban Dictionary."
"Damn. I didn't think about using that. I've just been pretending I know what they are saying. I smile and nod because I don't want to ask. If I did, I would sound as old as I feel."
"God, these little assholes make me feel like I need my AARP card."
"You're still younger than me."  Shawn nudged him. "I'm about to evolve into my mother. Soon I'll be asking Courtney how to use 'the Facebook.'"
"Bad news, old man. I think the popular social platform is TikTok now."
"What the fuck?" Shawn sunk his head into his hands. "This is why I hire a team specifically for social media. I can't keep up with this shit."
Miles rested his head on Shawn's shoulder. The kids in front of them were utterly oblivious to their proximity. Instead, they continued chatting as they left the kitchen and went up the stairs, presumably to Danny's floor. Shawn and Miles were finally left alone.
Miles sighed, relishing the new silence.
"I think I understand that Lord of the Rings quote now." Miles tried to change his baritone voice to mimic Bilbo Baggins, "I feel thin, sort of stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread."
Shawn laughed. "Please. At least you're not at the age where the ache in your knees can predict if it will rain." He patted his knees lightly. "These fuckers are more accurate than the meteorologists on the news."
Miles let a laugh rumble from his chest. "I'm not there just yet. But I have finally reached that point in life where I risk a back injury if I sleep wrong."
"Oh, I have learned that lesson long ago. Take my advice, don't skimp on your mattress or pillows. I have spent an ungodly amount of money on my bed."
Miles grinned and shifted his body so he could face Shawn. He leaned forward and lowered his voice, "Perhaps you can take me to your bed so I can get some advice on a good night's sleep."
Shawn closed the gap between them. "What makes you think I will show you anything about sleeping if you go to bed with me?"
They both paused and started to laugh. Miles rested his forehead on Shawn's. "When did I think a good mattress was sexy?"
"Just the mattress?" Shawn huffed.
"Fine, the pillows sound hot, too."
Shawn tilted his head and brushed his tongue along the outside of Miles' ear.  When he reached the lobe, he bit it lightly, drawing a stuttered breath from Miles.
"Fuck," Miles murmured.
"Tell me, Miles. What else attracts you to my bed?" Shawn's whisper was tantalizing and made Miles shiver.
However, he was still stubborn and grinned. "I'm sure your linens are to die for."
"Well, they are percale weave with a high thread count," Shawn whispered with a small laugh.
"God, I love your dirty talk." He sat up, brushing his nose against Shawn's. "Take me now."
Shawn laughed and placed a light kiss on his lips. "You're a fucking menace."
Miles smiled against his lips. "Fine. I'll admit it. I definitely want you in that bed too."
"No. Too late," Shawn teased.
Miles lifted his hands and circled them behind Shawn's neck. "Oh, Shawn. Don't be like that. I'm sure we can negotiate some terms and come to an agreement."
Shawn raised an eyebrow. "And what do you have in mind?"
Miles grinned, his eyes flicking over to the stairs, and the laughter of the three teenagers trickled down to the parlor. "Something that I can't say out loud. What if we're overheard?"
"You've been fine with kissing me with the risk of being caught."
A low rumble of a laugh came from Miles. "Kissing you is the most innocent thing I will do to you."
Shawn closed his eyes and took a few measured breaths. "So you're proposing a raincheck that involves my bed?"
"Yes. Have we reached an agreement?" Miles asked quietly against his lips.
"I believe so, Mr. Mendez."
They kissed again, and Shawn pushed Miles down on his back on the couch. Miles was typically the assertive one in any relationship. However, he found himself so compliant in Shawn's arms. He could finally let go of the tightly wound coil of control he thought he needed to maintain. He sighed contently against Shawn's lips. This was right.
Shawn rolled his hips against Miles, making Miles groan. However, they both paused and looked back at the stairs.
"Do you think they would notice if we disappear?" Shawn asked.
"The kids notice everything," Miles sighed. "At least they notice the most inconvenient things."
Shawn sighed and rested his head against Miles' neck. "We need to find a way to escape them."
As if on cue, loud voices and thumping of the stairs announced the return of the others. Shawn was regretful when he pulled off Miles. They quickly fixed their appearances before the trio came galavanting down back to the parlor.
Courtney noticed the two of them and gave them a curious glance. However, the two boys didn't seem to think anything was off.
"Shawn, you're still here? Were you going to drive us home?" Rob asked.
Shawn sighed lightly and pushed off the couch while giving Miles an apologetic look. "Right. Let's get you guys home."
Courtney looked panicked. "Oh, Rob and I can take the subway. You can stay with Miles a bit longer."
"Were they working?" Rob asked, and Courtney slapped his shoulder in response.
Miles got up to grab their jackets. "Shawn and I will not allow you to take the subway at this time of night."
As he handed Courtney her's, she blushed and softly said, "Sorry."
Miles chuckled and ruffled her hair a little. "Stop worrying about it. Just get home safe."
He and Danny walked the others to the door. Before Shawn stepped out, Miles called out after him. "You better not renege on our agreement."
Shawn stopped with a look of disbelief. "You think I would?"
Miles grinned playfully. "Not sure. I figured it was best to remind you that we have a verbal contract."
Shawn chuckled. "Don't worry. I'll call you very soon to fulfill the terms."
Miles grinned and watched them pile into Shawn's car from his doorway.  He waved to them before Shawn drove off.
When they left, Danny had rounded on Miles. "What was that?"
Miles checked his clothes to ensure nothing stood out to reveal that he was practically mauling  Shawn on the couch moments before. "What was what?"
"Were you doing business or flirting?"
Miles shrugged. "Perhaps my business was flirting?"
"Oh my god," Danny gasped and then split into a grin. "Did we interrupt anything? You should have told me! We could have stayed upstairs while you two—"
Miles covered Danny's mouth with his hand, fighting back the blush creeping up his neck. "I appreciate your, uh, enthusiasm for my love life, but it may be best if you go to bed now."
Danny stepped away. "Nope. We're talking about it. Is this a thing now?"
Miles gave a half-shrug and took off towards the stairs. Danny called out after him, but Miles just waved and escaped the conversation. He kept following the stairs until he was back in the basement. The lights of his equipment cut through the darkness, and he smiled.
He pulled off his shirt, tossed it on the couch, and took his place in front of the tables. A lot of things had happened, and he couldn't contain himself. He needed to burn the energy. He picked up his mask but froze while staring at his outstretched hands.  The scars were concealed well, but he was hyper-aware of them. He traced them with his fingers, remembering Shawn's lips on his skin.
He always hid them, obscuring them from view until it was habit. However, Shawn quickly broke down his walls. He couldn't believe how easily he let him in. Perhaps it was because of his initial impression of the man, but he also felt it was because of Shawn's unbridled genuineness. Around Miles, Shawn was consistently sincere.
His fingers started to run up his arms, tracing his tattoos. The complex geometric design was like a puzzle on his skin, fitting perfectly together. This tattoo style was popular, but his had unique elements, which was how Danny discovered he was Requiem.
Courtney and Rob didn't pay much attention to him to be able to link his tattoos with Requiem. However, Shawn will be able to. It would be a matter of time, especially if Miles wanted to take their relationship further.
He had to take a step back and consider his options.
He could press the brake on his relationship with Shawn. Keep his shirt on until he can figure out his next move.
Or, he could hide Requiem behind long-sleeved shirts... or shelve him in the meantime.
Miles sighed. He hated those ideas. He had forcibly stopped his creative flow for years, stockpiling music and beats in his mind until he wanted to explode. Only recently was he able to get back behind the mixer and start working on new beats and ideas. Nothing was perfect yet, and with his suspicions of Trickshot, he had trashed everything he had recently created.
But now, he felt like he was on the cusp of something great—unlike anything he had previously created. He was so close to something phenomenal. And not something that will give him awards or another trophy for the wall. He was about to create something that would stir his soul. He was going to be making magic.
On top of his breakthroughs, his DJs were warming to Aura's proposal. This meant he could let go of the weight of managing this team, leaving it in the hands of someone better, and do what he was meant to do.
And he could take off the mask.
His fingers brushed against the familiar mask. He knew it was his trademark. It was what people knew him as. Many people would think he was dramatic when talking about how stifling the mask is. However, it wasn't just the mask—it was the reason why he put it on in the first place.
After everything—his mom dying, punching Larry, getting arrested, and giving himself the scars on his wrist—he was vulnerable. He was 18 and now living in a rundown apartment in Brownsville alone. He was trying to get his life in order, moving forward and in a different direction. He accepted the scholarship to Columbia, hoping it would keep his mind busy, and started working any shit job he could find.
Somehow he survived the summer before his first year of college and dove into packing as many courses as possible in his first two semesters. He knew music was the given choice of career, but it was one professor that inspired him to jump into composition. He started to slow down in his second year of college and learned how to enjoy it a little with the help of Eve and Desmond.
He was even working in a small recording studio in Harlem. However, the problem with running around Manhattan, someone is bound to recognize you. The city was never big enough to drop off Larry Anderson's radar.
Larry didn't want to have anything to do with him, but he was scared as all hell that someone would find out he was Larry's bastard son. What made his predicament worse was Miles was his eldest son. So Larry opted for control to make him disappear. Miles didn't realize that someone was plotting against him. He was naive enough at that time to think that he and Larry would pretend the other didn't exist. But he understood something went sideways when the recording studio fired him for no reason.
After losing a couple of other jobs, Larry finally approached him. He warned Miles not to make a name for himself and ordered him to return to where he came from. And if Miles had made a name for himself, Larry would do everything within his power to tear him down.
And Miles believed him. Miles didn't have the means to fight back or defend himself then, so he could only retreat. He stayed hunkered down and snuck around the college campus. He didn't make any waves or stir the pot.
But music was in his blood, and there was no way he could suppress it. So to protect himself from Larry's manipulation, he donned the mask. Requiem became popular, so he started Dirge to create another layer of protection. He refused to publicly show his face as a DJ and record label owner.
Despite his success, part of his identity as a musician was built out of fear. So if he could shed the mask, he could unshackle himself of that underlying fear.
Things were different now.
He was worried that Brian would tell Larry about him owning Dirge, but Brian had no idea he was related to Larry. The possibility was low because he could rely on Brian's ignorance and his father's obsessive desire to hide his parentage.
Additionally, he was financially secure. Danny was helping him, so he had someone supporting him. And he had Shawn, who was overwhelmingly perfect—the beacon amidst the tragedy he called life.
Being around Shawn made him want to sink into the comfort of his presence. It was like the garbled white noise of the world quieted when they touched.
He laughed at himself.
It was too soon for these types of feelings, right? He wouldn't drop the big L-word, but he felt something substantial was blooming.
He found that every time he met with Shawn, something more was always uncovered. Another layer of his personality that drew him in.
He admitted that when they first met, he was attracted to him but felt more affection toward Shawn as a savior.
But now, with every conversation and touch, he was falling. The ground was gone entirely from under his feet, and there was nothing to hold on to. He just had to let the gravity of his feelings pull him along. He should be frightened. He should want to panic or fight it. However, he had no inclination to do so.
He was content with his fall.
And if part of that journey was Shawn finding out about Requiem, then so be it. He wouldn't hide it. And when the time came, he wouldn't conceal it.
He smiled lightly and covered his face with the mask, knowing one day, the mask would disappear as well.
He started his stream and let the music take him to new heights.
He didn't pay attention to his stream's comments or how many people tuned in. Creation was at his fingertips, and he reveled in the new magic.