Beyond Love - Chapter 2: Chapter 2
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"Marry me?"
The words filled his ears, and Chip swore he could feel his heart right there—loud, and very clear indeed. He was trembling; from shock or from the weight of the other's words, he did not know.
But there was one thing he did know—and that was of the beautiful present he resided in.
Strangely, it did not feel like a dream, no.
What he felt was something different, as if he was entirely aware of where, how, and why he stood in front of a kneeling Xander at that very moment.
And as the words reached in to touch his heart, the young man could not help but let slip a teary smile of sincere happiness that he hadn't felt for a very long time.
For there was a tiny velvet box before his eyes in which the one he so loved had opened—to reveal the sparkling ring that he had spoken of before.
But did the ring really matter to Chip?
Really, now—the reason why he was smiling wasn't because he had been proposed to.
The reason why his eyes couldn't seem to focus behind the flowing tears wasn't because of the beauty of such a tiny object like a ring.
But perhaps; it was really—
"W-We're in public, silly..." The small frame wiped his wet eyes with the back of his sleeve, sniffling with a blush as his gaze darted round the station.
Xander laughed, taking his hand. "Is that a yes?"
"You're so mean! You...you just wanted to embarrass me didn't you? Such a...a..."
There wasn't room for another word; for the space was filled with a very warm feeling that Chip hadn't felt in a very long time.
It wasn't far away, out of his grasp like it was before—but right here, beside him.
He could feel it;
As Xander slipped the ring onto his trembling fourth finger.
Xander's angel wondered if his other could feel the strong beat of his heart; hear it race with a start—
"Shit, my heart's beating so fast," The tall figure rose with a single nervous laugh, pulling his angel towards him for a warm embrace.
"That's...that's because this isn't good for the heart," Chip protested into Xander's chest, as he felt it shake from the low laughter.
"Really?"
"Un."
"Well then, I guess you'll be having a bad heart forever."
Chip blinked, and for some reason, both hearts couldn't seem to hear the applause that surrounded them in the station.
"What do you mean?"
"That I'll be here,
Beside you—
For...an annoyingly long time."
And with that, in this big, wide world—there were two tiny, somewhat insignificant existences that seemed to have found their way beyond existence.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
[Chip]
"Um, Xander? Where are we going?" I asked tentatively, trailing behind as I let him lead the way with my hand in his.
"Giselle's Art School. My father put her in the hostel before asking me to leave," He turned back, smiling reassuringly. "We'll pick her up and go home for today."
I felt my heart twist uneasily.
"H-Have you told your father then? About this—that you're not leaving?"
We arrived at the main road outside the train station, and Xander scanned the oncoming traffic for a taxi. "No, actually."
I raised my gaze to meet his—anxious.
"Why not? W-What if he gets mad?"
Xander laughed, leaning down to plant a chaste kiss on my forehead. "Don't worry Angel. He probably doesn't agree with anything I ever do, anyway."
"And besides," He went on—for once, warmth in his grey eyes that had seemed to stop raining—
"I didn't think that miracles existed.
But who knew?
There was you."
The heart stopped for a while, taking in the loving smile. I couldn't seem to feel the ground, for it was a strange thing to hear those words from the one you loved.
H-How can he say those things so easily?
And what were the chances that both of us gave Love not just a second chance, but a third, fourth—even fifth?
What is it—when one can live without them, and yet, choose not to?
What are the odds of choosing the path filled with pain and sorrow—when you can choose to be free?
And this is how I knew that the person in front of me;
Was perhaps the only one that had the strength to put his faith in this useless being that I was—that we'd go down the path, together, and maybe, just maybe;
It wouldn't be so painful after all.
"Scared?" He asked, glancing down at me as he flagged down an oncoming taxi.
I could see the slight worry in his eyes—that I might have my doubts, that I might not be as willing as he was.
But Xander was wrong.
"No. Not at all," I smiled, knowing that it was no lie.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Giselle didn't seem to believe her ears when she heard Xander's voice—and neither did she seem to believe them when she heard mine.
I think, for once, she wished that she could see. So that perhaps, she could confirm that this wasn't a figment of her imagination.
And if she could—if she had eyes—I was sure that they'd be brimming with hope that was larger than the world itself.
"Xandie? Chocolate Chip?" Her arms loosened from clutching her knees that she had brought close to her chest—something that she'd always do when she was uncomfortable.
"Yeah."
I didn't respond; for there was an ache in my chest as I felt her uncertainty and fear of the new environment. How lost she might have been at the orders of her father without Xander, thinking that she'd have to live alone in this place—
"How are you?" She asked, for that was what she had been taught at school—that this was how we should greet people. "Are you okay?"
And that questioned yielded an answer that, despite being painful to say, was in some sense the present truth.
Xander was silent, standing quite a distance apart with a sad smile traced on the edge of his lips.
"I-I'm good, Giselle," I smiled tentatively, reaching down to give her one of those warm cuddles she adored.
"Good is...good," Xander's sister nodded with a giggle. "I missed you and cupcakes."
I laughed small, feeling the heart soar.
"Okay! Let's go home and we can bake some cupcakes, alright?"
"Dokie okie," Giselle held on to my hand tightly—
As if afraid that I'd disappear.
.
"Chip!"
I turned at the familiar voice, surprised eyes meeting my sister's. "Gretel?"
"Oh gosh you look so tired! Did you receive my card? Happy Birthday!" She smiled, reaching over to give me a quick hug. "What's going on? I just got a call from the office that Giselle's not going to stay in the hostel anymore. Is she quitting school?"
My head spun slightly at the barrage of questions, but that was just how Gretel loved to greet others.
"Uwa slow down Gretel!" I protested, turning to check on Xander and Giselle who were in the General Office of the school, sorting out some documents.
"Well, um...it's a long story, but Giselle's not going to stay in the hostel anymore. I don't think she likes it there either..."
"Ah, I see. Well then, she'd still be going to school, wouldn't she?" Gretel asked hopefully. "A-Apparently she's not been paying her school fees. I was wondering if there was something amiss—she's...she's not going to quit, is she? She's got talent, that girl—"
"I...I'm not too sure either, Gretel," I played with my fingers uneasily, gaze lowering. "I think it's up to Xander and Giselle."
There was a growing darkness that ate at my heart; and I began to wonder what it was. Uncertainty? Of what?
The path ahead?
"If! If she can't pay the fees, I can always—"
"Uwa Gretel! I'm sorry, but I really, really don't know what's going on either," I fidgeted uncomfortably.
"A-All I know is that we have to trust Xander and Giselle. I'm sure they'll make the right decision—I...I have faith in them."
Gretel paused.
Her shoulders relaxed slightly, and she smiled. "Look at that; my little brother's all grown up."
I pouted. "H-Hey, just because we haven't seen each other in a long time doesn't mean that I haven't grown at all."
"I'm taller too," I made sure to add happily.
"...really?" Gretel frowned, and I gave her a look.
"But you know what? You're right. I shouldn't... shouldn't worry too much," She glanced towards the door of the office. Trust them huh? Guess I can do that."
"Just...just really worried about Giselle."
There was a certain warmth in her words; and it radiated a sincere glow.
"Hehe, thanks Gretel," I closed the distance to hug my sister. "You're a good teacher."
I reached over to put my arms around her—
"Ow—omg stop something's caught in my hair," Gretel yelped, reaching behind her head.
I felt a strange resistance on my ring finger; and that was when I noticed that my ring was caught in Gretel's long hair.
"U-Uwa! I'm so sorry," I hurried to entangle my ring from her hair carefully, knowing that Gretel was very particular about her appearance.
"What is it? How did you even—" Her eyes widened at the sight of the accessory. "Wait. What?"
My sister was silent.
"Uh—Chip, is that...what I...think..." Her gaze flitted between the door of the General Office and my hand; and then it clicked.
The sides of her lips curved—then widened into a full blown smile that resembled a creepy Cheshire cat's.
"O.M.G. Chippy. I can't beeeelieve it!" She giggled, unable to contain her excitement as she nudged me in the ribs.
"I SEE YOU GOT THE D!!"
This explains why we were getting so many strange glances.
This also explains why Gretel is Hansel's twin.
This also explains why Gretel doesn't know how to say things at the right time and right place.
Naturally, I felt the need to hide myself in a hole and never ever surface again—
Especially when Xander emerged from the Office, Giselle trailing behind, just in time to hear my sister's embarrassing exclamation.
The tall figure shrugged, a hint of a smirk on his lips, "Glad you approve."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
It was late by the time we arrived back home. Quiet; and slightly overwhelmed by the events of the day, I bid Xander and Giselle goodnight, tottering over to the apartment next door.
"Angel?"
I paused, strangely, unused to the name.
It seemed different;
Different from how he would usually say it.
"U-Um, yes?" Turning, I raised my gaze to meet his. How...how strange. He didn't look tired at all.
Xander unlocked the door for Giselle, then closed the distance between us.
Leaning down, he spoke beside my ear; as if there was a secret he didn't want anyone else to hear.
"I'll call you later?"
"Ah! Okay, I'll be, um...waiting," I finished lamely, feeling the tips of my ears grow hot.
Xander laughed lowly, his finger tracing the edge of my ear. "A-And stop that, it tickles!"
"Don't worry Angel, I'll make sure to do that more often."
My lips parted in shock, proceeding to give my best glare.
"Alright, that's enough teasing for today," His arms dropped to the side—and for some reason, I felt a dull sensation rise in my chest. "Rest well Angel."
Xander turned, making his way back to the unit beside mine.
H-He's going already?
Was it something that I said—
Then, he turned;
As if he had heard the unspoken voice of the heart.
Am I really—
"Come here," Arms opened, calling.
Am I really going?
His warmth drew, and I was drawn.
Towards the beat; of what?
Perhaps just the sound
Of his heart.
Are we really going—
To remain by each other's side forever?
This is happening, isn't it?
It's not one of my dreams again, is it?
.
The cold floor felt less welcomed than usual after a hot bath, and for some reason I simply felt like snuggling under the covers with a hot water bottle.
Drying myself and slipping on my favorite pajamas with cute cupcake prints on them, I flopped onto the fluffy pillows—grabbing my phone from the bedside table.
"Oh, a text," I blinked, speaking to myself. Unlocking the screen, I realized, once again, that I had yet to change the wallpaper. Xander's full-glory abs were in complete view.
Fortunately, there was no one to see how red my cheeks were at that point of time.
Well you could always change the wallpaper you dummy, my brain chided.
Yes, but after looking at the text...? My heart asked hopefully.
You always say that! I swear, you're never going to change it.
O-Okay okay, I'll do it now...but what if the text is from Xander? I'll just check to make—it is! It's from Xander!
...I give up.
______________________
[22:11] Your Mortal:
Subject: Hey
Can I call you? Just to check if you're okay. You looked very tired.
______________________
My heart beat slightly faster; and slightly stronger.
At the same time, I wasn't exactly in the right state to have Xander's voice beside my ear.
_______________________
[22:12] To: Your Mortal
Subject: Uwa
Nu
________________________
His reply was almost immediate.
________________________
[22:13] Your Mortal:
Subject: :(
Why not Angel?
________________________
[22:14] To: Your Mortal
Subject: Uwa
Cuz your voice sounds really low on the phone! /.\
Not good for the heart.
Plus, it's beside my ear!
So, no
_________________________
Placing my phone on the bedside table, I couldn't help but wonder what the strange bubbling emotion that resided within my chest was.
I felt restless—despite my efforts to contain the smile on my face, it was turning out to be quite a flop. I resorted to rolling on the bed, hoping that it'd get rid of the bubbles in my heart.
It felt like an urge to squeal.
________________________
[22:16] Your Mortal:
Subject: Great, now I'm horny.
You've got a point.
_________________________
The moment my eyes glanced at the subject title, I hid my face in the pillows—taking quite some time to recover.
_________________________
[22:17] To: Your Mortal
Subject: ???
!!!
__________________________
[22:18] Your Mortal:
Subject: You are not helping
That aside Angel, I wanted to ask if you'd like to move in with me. ;)
We can move somewhere nearer to the bakery. Less trouble you know?
___________________________
I blinked.
Move...?
That's pretty sudden...
Then, I caught myself. It's not as if we've never lived together before. Is it really that sudden?
____________________________
[22:20] To: Your Mortal
Subject: /.\
Xander are you free to talk at the balcony? >_<
____________________________
[22:18] Your Mortal:
Subject: No subject
Sure Angel ;)
__________________________
Slipping on a pair of fluffy home slippers by the bed, I tottered over to the living room—parting the curtains and unlocking the door to the balcony.
I stepped into the open air tentatively, wondering if anyone else was out looking at the night sky.
The city lights prevented the sight of a starry sky; but I noticed one or two that shone. Quite lonely.
"Angel?" Xander's voice made me jump, and I turned to the balcony on my left.
The first thing I noticed was that Xander was that he didn't have a shirt on—then I quickly thanked my stars that it was probably dark enough not to notice my red ears.
"O-Oh. Hello," I waved awkwardly from across the distance, hoping that he could hear me.
The tall figure laughed, leaning forward and resting his arms over the railings. "Cute pajamas."
I felt my cheeks heat up further as I pouted quickly in defense. "Don't laugh!"
"I mean it," He shrugged with a smirk. "I bet it'll look even cuter on the floor."
I blinked. "But then I'll have to wash it...?"
"Nevermind," Xander held up a hand quickly, the other shielding his eyes like a makeshift facepalm. "You wanted to talk?"
"O-Oh! Un, yeah. I—well, moving? Don't you think it's um, kinda fast?" I asked softly, hoping that he wouldn't get offended by my questioning.
Uwa Chip what are you doing??
"Honestly," Xander sighed, leaning against the wall in a comfortable position. "Yeah. I wasn't planning on it either...after all, I just proposed to you a couple of hours ago."
I couldn't help but blush at the word, slightly speechless.
"But my father knows where we live," He turned to me, eyes uneasy. "I don't want him to hurt you or Giselle. He's probably in flames right now, Trudy's gonna tell him that I didn't leave."
"I don't really care if I lose the things I have now. Wealth, career, property—well, I can always work for it again.
But I don't think there's anything that could replace the ones I Love."
Xander turned to me with a smile that rendered my heart useless for a moment; for there was a sharp pain that seemed to hurt deep inside.
"You...you dummy," I managed, biting my lip. "You gave up so much just for...just for—"
"You're the dummy, dummy," Xander laughed, leaning over the railings, and reaching over to ruffle my hair. "Don't you understand?"
"O-Of course I don't."
"Dummy."
"Dummy."
"We're both dummies. How does that sound?"
"...you've...got a point."
Xander laughed. "We're kinda stupid aren't we?"
"T-That's not really a question," I laughed small, eyes resting on the one I Love. And strangely, his eyes did too.
"I just wanted you to know that...
The reason why we have matching rings on our fingers isn't because we're married—
It's because I'll be there for you for the rest of your life. And the reason why I proposed to you was because I am sure—
I am sure you'd be there too.
No matter what.
The rest of your life."
I swallowed the lump at the back of my throat, trying my best to contain the emotions that threatened to take the reins of my heart.
"I-I'm sorry...it's just...I..." Sniff.
"That we don't have both our parents?"
I bit my lip.
How did he know?
Trust me, seeing my parents' married life crumble to pieces wasn't a perfect example of what I thought was Love," Xander laughed, and I did, too.
"I think we both know the bad side of marriage."
"It...it doesn't always work out, does it?" I laughed sheepishly, rubbing my eyes and sniffling once more.
"Yeah."
There was a moment of silence, in which neither of us seemed to mind; and both of us were quite comfortable with.
"Besides the fact that I hate my father," Xander said after a while, "I'd like to see you every day."
I jumped, blushing furiously. "U-Uwa..."
"I'd like you to be the first one I see in the morning. I'd like to share a bed with you. I'd like to eat with you. I'd like to be—"
"O-O-Okay okay! Stop it uwa," I flailed my arms around miserably, trying my best to shush Xander.
"—the luckiest, happiest man in the Universe."
Is it possible?
"I already am, actually," He laughed, taking my hand that tried to cover his mouth and caressing it softly.
I wonder if it is.
For a cup to be filled more than it can hold—
Without warning, he leaned down—as if ready for a bow—only to leave a kiss on the back of my hand.
For a heart to be filled more than it should be—
"Strawberries?" Xander smirked, and I blinked in confusion.
"Eh?"
"It's our code."
"O-Oh. For?"
I blushed hard when Xander replied, retrieving my hand quickly as glancing around as if paranoid that someone had heard that.
"X-Xander! You...you don't really need to..."
"What? It's cute. Like you," He smirked cockily, slipping his hands into his pockets. "Also, Angel, would you stop calling me Xander? It's weird."
I gave him a very incredulous look. "But that's your name, silly!"
"Ah~ but you used to call me something else...you were so cute then," My fiancé pretended to lament in disappointment.
"You're so mean!" The back of my neck felt insanely hot. "I'm going to sleep!"
Xander chuckled, his laugh low and pleasant as usual.
"Yes my angel. Rest well. Sweet dreams."
"Y-You too...Xan," I replied softly, shuffling over to the balcony door quickly—
"Sorry Angel, what did you say? I didn't quite catch that..."
"I-I said good night...Xan," I raised my voice slightly, knowing that Xander would surely hear me this time and I'd die of embarrassment.
"Hm? Angel—I know you're cute and all but sometimes I really can't hear—" He was laughing, and that was when I realized that he was just teasing me.
"Go awaaaayy!"
"It's impolite to leave after turning me on, Angel!"
To Love someone more than it is ever possible to.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
[Xander]
I spent the night pouring over the internet, searching for affordable housing near the bakery. Unfortunately, there were tons of available ones in the current city Chip and I lived in—but the ones in the next town were minute in number.
Sighing, I glanced at the bottom of my screen to check the time.
Fuck it's four.
Feeling slightly hopeless, I called for backup.
It rang once. Twice. Thrice—
"You little bitch—"
"Don't kill me, I know. I owe you big time, okay? Do you know any property agents who used to live in the town back when we were in Rivendelle?"
"You called me at fucking..." Blake paused, probably to check the time. I braced myself for the blow, "Four in the morningfor this?! I hate you."
"Oh come on," I reasoned, "You owe me one for persuading Ace to give you a second chance because you suck at doing men—"
"Says the one who has a sucky life," I could already see Blake flipping me off. "I seriously don't get why you need a property agent dude. Didn't you leave for the airport? I thought you called to like, cry."
"...I don't do that."
"Yeah right, bitch."
"Says the one who cried at the end of the Hobbit—" I laughed.
"Dude! Tauriel and Kili are my OTP, you know that."
"Blake, can you at least answer my question before launching into a full blow-by-blow explanation of why they are perfect together for the...hundredth time?"
Blake sighed, and I could hear the shuffling of sheets on the other end of the call. "Fine. Er, you remember Seth? The senior on our team that does topspin every time he serves?"
"No."
"...you see, this is why no one loves you Xander—"
"Just so you know, I'm engaged. You might wanna watch out," I warned playfully, only to receive a shocked pause from my best friend.
When there was silence on the other side of the call for a longer-than-necessary time, I prompted him with a 'what'.
"You...? Xander...? Er, you didn't get engaged with that bitch Trudy, did you...?"
"What the fuck Blake," I snorted, "Did you really think I was that sort of person?"
"How would I know? Your dad pushed you to a corner. Chip left you a freaking letter to say that you guys were done!" Blake hissed in confusion. "And I thought my life was messed up."
"I guess...miracles happen," I smiled to no one in particular.
Being the only friend who stayed in my life for more than a month, Blake seemed to understand what I meant without asking.
"Then I'm glad it did. 'Grats dude, you guys deserve to be happy together."
How long has it been since anyone has told us that?
I've spent so many years seeking approval—acceptance of us being together from the people around me;
That when I hear this, I feel...
Somewhat, relieved.
I laughed. "Be honored that you're the first one I told."
"Yeah, yeah, super," Blake remarked sarcastically. "Do you want to know about Seth or not?"
"Fine, yes."
"I caught up with him a couple of weeks ago. Met him at a bar when Ace and I were...hanging out."
"Hanging out," I repeated with a smirk.
"He told me he's pretty busy lately. Passed me a business card. He might be able to help you guys," Blake suggested, ignoring my tease. "Not sure though."
"Great. Send me a picture of the card?"
"Doing it after you drop the call."
"Thanks. Saved," I sighed in sincere gratitude.
"I don't see how you're saved, Xander..." Blake continued uneasily. "Your dad's not gonna let you off just like that. You know what I mean."
I nodded silently.
"I'll figure it out. Gonna resign soon by the way—sorry for leaving you alone in that stupid company."
"I've got Ace as my secretary," Blake emphasized jokingly. "I don't need you."
"Well you'll be needing me as your advisor since you, again, suck at doing—"
"Okay, okay! Shut up, good God," My best friend interrupted with a groan. "Conclusion; you're going to be a househusband?"
"I don't think I can afford that if I want Giselle to have an eye surgery. Besides, I'm not gonna let my angel carry all that financial burden on his own, am I? We have to share it in the very least..."
Blake laughed loudly. "Someone has grown up."
"Don't be a bitch."
"Hey, I'm nice," Blake retorted, "I was going to say that our coach in High school retired. He's looking for someone to replace him in Rivendelle."
I blinked.
"Seriously? Um, but I'm not certified or anything..."
"Just give him a call. He wouldn't forget our god-like ace named Xander stupid Jaxon," The ex-captain of the volleyball team teased bitterly.
"Don't have his number."
"...you freaking loner."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Loner?
I can't possibly disagree, can I?
What's this, then?
That I am no longer alone?
And even if I am,
I can—
With faith and conviction say:
That perhaps, I'm not lonely at all.
My angel
Do you know why?
Because when there is Love;
You will never be lonely even if you are alone.
I will be here.
I am here.
Even if I am not.
The words filled his ears, and Chip swore he could feel his heart right there—loud, and very clear indeed. He was trembling; from shock or from the weight of the other's words, he did not know.
But there was one thing he did know—and that was of the beautiful present he resided in.
Strangely, it did not feel like a dream, no.
What he felt was something different, as if he was entirely aware of where, how, and why he stood in front of a kneeling Xander at that very moment.
And as the words reached in to touch his heart, the young man could not help but let slip a teary smile of sincere happiness that he hadn't felt for a very long time.
For there was a tiny velvet box before his eyes in which the one he so loved had opened—to reveal the sparkling ring that he had spoken of before.
But did the ring really matter to Chip?
Really, now—the reason why he was smiling wasn't because he had been proposed to.
The reason why his eyes couldn't seem to focus behind the flowing tears wasn't because of the beauty of such a tiny object like a ring.
But perhaps; it was really—
"W-We're in public, silly..." The small frame wiped his wet eyes with the back of his sleeve, sniffling with a blush as his gaze darted round the station.
Xander laughed, taking his hand. "Is that a yes?"
"You're so mean! You...you just wanted to embarrass me didn't you? Such a...a..."
There wasn't room for another word; for the space was filled with a very warm feeling that Chip hadn't felt in a very long time.
It wasn't far away, out of his grasp like it was before—but right here, beside him.
He could feel it;
As Xander slipped the ring onto his trembling fourth finger.
Xander's angel wondered if his other could feel the strong beat of his heart; hear it race with a start—
"Shit, my heart's beating so fast," The tall figure rose with a single nervous laugh, pulling his angel towards him for a warm embrace.
"That's...that's because this isn't good for the heart," Chip protested into Xander's chest, as he felt it shake from the low laughter.
"Really?"
"Un."
"Well then, I guess you'll be having a bad heart forever."
Chip blinked, and for some reason, both hearts couldn't seem to hear the applause that surrounded them in the station.
"What do you mean?"
"That I'll be here,
Beside you—
For...an annoyingly long time."
And with that, in this big, wide world—there were two tiny, somewhat insignificant existences that seemed to have found their way beyond existence.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
[Chip]
"Um, Xander? Where are we going?" I asked tentatively, trailing behind as I let him lead the way with my hand in his.
"Giselle's Art School. My father put her in the hostel before asking me to leave," He turned back, smiling reassuringly. "We'll pick her up and go home for today."
I felt my heart twist uneasily.
"H-Have you told your father then? About this—that you're not leaving?"
We arrived at the main road outside the train station, and Xander scanned the oncoming traffic for a taxi. "No, actually."
I raised my gaze to meet his—anxious.
"Why not? W-What if he gets mad?"
Xander laughed, leaning down to plant a chaste kiss on my forehead. "Don't worry Angel. He probably doesn't agree with anything I ever do, anyway."
"And besides," He went on—for once, warmth in his grey eyes that had seemed to stop raining—
"I didn't think that miracles existed.
But who knew?
There was you."
The heart stopped for a while, taking in the loving smile. I couldn't seem to feel the ground, for it was a strange thing to hear those words from the one you loved.
H-How can he say those things so easily?
And what were the chances that both of us gave Love not just a second chance, but a third, fourth—even fifth?
What is it—when one can live without them, and yet, choose not to?
What are the odds of choosing the path filled with pain and sorrow—when you can choose to be free?
And this is how I knew that the person in front of me;
Was perhaps the only one that had the strength to put his faith in this useless being that I was—that we'd go down the path, together, and maybe, just maybe;
It wouldn't be so painful after all.
"Scared?" He asked, glancing down at me as he flagged down an oncoming taxi.
I could see the slight worry in his eyes—that I might have my doubts, that I might not be as willing as he was.
But Xander was wrong.
"No. Not at all," I smiled, knowing that it was no lie.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Giselle didn't seem to believe her ears when she heard Xander's voice—and neither did she seem to believe them when she heard mine.
I think, for once, she wished that she could see. So that perhaps, she could confirm that this wasn't a figment of her imagination.
And if she could—if she had eyes—I was sure that they'd be brimming with hope that was larger than the world itself.
"Xandie? Chocolate Chip?" Her arms loosened from clutching her knees that she had brought close to her chest—something that she'd always do when she was uncomfortable.
"Yeah."
I didn't respond; for there was an ache in my chest as I felt her uncertainty and fear of the new environment. How lost she might have been at the orders of her father without Xander, thinking that she'd have to live alone in this place—
"How are you?" She asked, for that was what she had been taught at school—that this was how we should greet people. "Are you okay?"
And that questioned yielded an answer that, despite being painful to say, was in some sense the present truth.
Xander was silent, standing quite a distance apart with a sad smile traced on the edge of his lips.
"I-I'm good, Giselle," I smiled tentatively, reaching down to give her one of those warm cuddles she adored.
"Good is...good," Xander's sister nodded with a giggle. "I missed you and cupcakes."
I laughed small, feeling the heart soar.
"Okay! Let's go home and we can bake some cupcakes, alright?"
"Dokie okie," Giselle held on to my hand tightly—
As if afraid that I'd disappear.
.
"Chip!"
I turned at the familiar voice, surprised eyes meeting my sister's. "Gretel?"
"Oh gosh you look so tired! Did you receive my card? Happy Birthday!" She smiled, reaching over to give me a quick hug. "What's going on? I just got a call from the office that Giselle's not going to stay in the hostel anymore. Is she quitting school?"
My head spun slightly at the barrage of questions, but that was just how Gretel loved to greet others.
"Uwa slow down Gretel!" I protested, turning to check on Xander and Giselle who were in the General Office of the school, sorting out some documents.
"Well, um...it's a long story, but Giselle's not going to stay in the hostel anymore. I don't think she likes it there either..."
"Ah, I see. Well then, she'd still be going to school, wouldn't she?" Gretel asked hopefully. "A-Apparently she's not been paying her school fees. I was wondering if there was something amiss—she's...she's not going to quit, is she? She's got talent, that girl—"
"I...I'm not too sure either, Gretel," I played with my fingers uneasily, gaze lowering. "I think it's up to Xander and Giselle."
There was a growing darkness that ate at my heart; and I began to wonder what it was. Uncertainty? Of what?
The path ahead?
"If! If she can't pay the fees, I can always—"
"Uwa Gretel! I'm sorry, but I really, really don't know what's going on either," I fidgeted uncomfortably.
"A-All I know is that we have to trust Xander and Giselle. I'm sure they'll make the right decision—I...I have faith in them."
Gretel paused.
Her shoulders relaxed slightly, and she smiled. "Look at that; my little brother's all grown up."
I pouted. "H-Hey, just because we haven't seen each other in a long time doesn't mean that I haven't grown at all."
"I'm taller too," I made sure to add happily.
"...really?" Gretel frowned, and I gave her a look.
"But you know what? You're right. I shouldn't... shouldn't worry too much," She glanced towards the door of the office. Trust them huh? Guess I can do that."
"Just...just really worried about Giselle."
There was a certain warmth in her words; and it radiated a sincere glow.
"Hehe, thanks Gretel," I closed the distance to hug my sister. "You're a good teacher."
I reached over to put my arms around her—
"Ow—omg stop something's caught in my hair," Gretel yelped, reaching behind her head.
I felt a strange resistance on my ring finger; and that was when I noticed that my ring was caught in Gretel's long hair.
"U-Uwa! I'm so sorry," I hurried to entangle my ring from her hair carefully, knowing that Gretel was very particular about her appearance.
"What is it? How did you even—" Her eyes widened at the sight of the accessory. "Wait. What?"
My sister was silent.
"Uh—Chip, is that...what I...think..." Her gaze flitted between the door of the General Office and my hand; and then it clicked.
The sides of her lips curved—then widened into a full blown smile that resembled a creepy Cheshire cat's.
"O.M.G. Chippy. I can't beeeelieve it!" She giggled, unable to contain her excitement as she nudged me in the ribs.
"I SEE YOU GOT THE D!!"
This explains why we were getting so many strange glances.
This also explains why Gretel is Hansel's twin.
This also explains why Gretel doesn't know how to say things at the right time and right place.
Naturally, I felt the need to hide myself in a hole and never ever surface again—
Especially when Xander emerged from the Office, Giselle trailing behind, just in time to hear my sister's embarrassing exclamation.
The tall figure shrugged, a hint of a smirk on his lips, "Glad you approve."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
It was late by the time we arrived back home. Quiet; and slightly overwhelmed by the events of the day, I bid Xander and Giselle goodnight, tottering over to the apartment next door.
"Angel?"
I paused, strangely, unused to the name.
It seemed different;
Different from how he would usually say it.
"U-Um, yes?" Turning, I raised my gaze to meet his. How...how strange. He didn't look tired at all.
Xander unlocked the door for Giselle, then closed the distance between us.
Leaning down, he spoke beside my ear; as if there was a secret he didn't want anyone else to hear.
"I'll call you later?"
"Ah! Okay, I'll be, um...waiting," I finished lamely, feeling the tips of my ears grow hot.
Xander laughed lowly, his finger tracing the edge of my ear. "A-And stop that, it tickles!"
"Don't worry Angel, I'll make sure to do that more often."
My lips parted in shock, proceeding to give my best glare.
"Alright, that's enough teasing for today," His arms dropped to the side—and for some reason, I felt a dull sensation rise in my chest. "Rest well Angel."
Xander turned, making his way back to the unit beside mine.
H-He's going already?
Was it something that I said—
Then, he turned;
As if he had heard the unspoken voice of the heart.
Am I really—
"Come here," Arms opened, calling.
Am I really going?
His warmth drew, and I was drawn.
Towards the beat; of what?
Perhaps just the sound
Of his heart.
Are we really going—
To remain by each other's side forever?
This is happening, isn't it?
It's not one of my dreams again, is it?
.
The cold floor felt less welcomed than usual after a hot bath, and for some reason I simply felt like snuggling under the covers with a hot water bottle.
Drying myself and slipping on my favorite pajamas with cute cupcake prints on them, I flopped onto the fluffy pillows—grabbing my phone from the bedside table.
"Oh, a text," I blinked, speaking to myself. Unlocking the screen, I realized, once again, that I had yet to change the wallpaper. Xander's full-glory abs were in complete view.
Fortunately, there was no one to see how red my cheeks were at that point of time.
Well you could always change the wallpaper you dummy, my brain chided.
Yes, but after looking at the text...? My heart asked hopefully.
You always say that! I swear, you're never going to change it.
O-Okay okay, I'll do it now...but what if the text is from Xander? I'll just check to make—it is! It's from Xander!
...I give up.
______________________
[22:11] Your Mortal:
Subject: Hey
Can I call you? Just to check if you're okay. You looked very tired.
______________________
My heart beat slightly faster; and slightly stronger.
At the same time, I wasn't exactly in the right state to have Xander's voice beside my ear.
_______________________
[22:12] To: Your Mortal
Subject: Uwa
Nu
________________________
His reply was almost immediate.
________________________
[22:13] Your Mortal:
Subject: :(
Why not Angel?
________________________
[22:14] To: Your Mortal
Subject: Uwa
Cuz your voice sounds really low on the phone! /.\
Not good for the heart.
Plus, it's beside my ear!
So, no
_________________________
Placing my phone on the bedside table, I couldn't help but wonder what the strange bubbling emotion that resided within my chest was.
I felt restless—despite my efforts to contain the smile on my face, it was turning out to be quite a flop. I resorted to rolling on the bed, hoping that it'd get rid of the bubbles in my heart.
It felt like an urge to squeal.
________________________
[22:16] Your Mortal:
Subject: Great, now I'm horny.
You've got a point.
_________________________
The moment my eyes glanced at the subject title, I hid my face in the pillows—taking quite some time to recover.
_________________________
[22:17] To: Your Mortal
Subject: ???
!!!
__________________________
[22:18] Your Mortal:
Subject: You are not helping
That aside Angel, I wanted to ask if you'd like to move in with me. ;)
We can move somewhere nearer to the bakery. Less trouble you know?
___________________________
I blinked.
Move...?
That's pretty sudden...
Then, I caught myself. It's not as if we've never lived together before. Is it really that sudden?
____________________________
[22:20] To: Your Mortal
Subject: /.\
Xander are you free to talk at the balcony? >_<
____________________________
[22:18] Your Mortal:
Subject: No subject
Sure Angel ;)
__________________________
Slipping on a pair of fluffy home slippers by the bed, I tottered over to the living room—parting the curtains and unlocking the door to the balcony.
I stepped into the open air tentatively, wondering if anyone else was out looking at the night sky.
The city lights prevented the sight of a starry sky; but I noticed one or two that shone. Quite lonely.
"Angel?" Xander's voice made me jump, and I turned to the balcony on my left.
The first thing I noticed was that Xander was that he didn't have a shirt on—then I quickly thanked my stars that it was probably dark enough not to notice my red ears.
"O-Oh. Hello," I waved awkwardly from across the distance, hoping that he could hear me.
The tall figure laughed, leaning forward and resting his arms over the railings. "Cute pajamas."
I felt my cheeks heat up further as I pouted quickly in defense. "Don't laugh!"
"I mean it," He shrugged with a smirk. "I bet it'll look even cuter on the floor."
I blinked. "But then I'll have to wash it...?"
"Nevermind," Xander held up a hand quickly, the other shielding his eyes like a makeshift facepalm. "You wanted to talk?"
"O-Oh! Un, yeah. I—well, moving? Don't you think it's um, kinda fast?" I asked softly, hoping that he wouldn't get offended by my questioning.
Uwa Chip what are you doing??
"Honestly," Xander sighed, leaning against the wall in a comfortable position. "Yeah. I wasn't planning on it either...after all, I just proposed to you a couple of hours ago."
I couldn't help but blush at the word, slightly speechless.
"But my father knows where we live," He turned to me, eyes uneasy. "I don't want him to hurt you or Giselle. He's probably in flames right now, Trudy's gonna tell him that I didn't leave."
"I don't really care if I lose the things I have now. Wealth, career, property—well, I can always work for it again.
But I don't think there's anything that could replace the ones I Love."
Xander turned to me with a smile that rendered my heart useless for a moment; for there was a sharp pain that seemed to hurt deep inside.
"You...you dummy," I managed, biting my lip. "You gave up so much just for...just for—"
"You're the dummy, dummy," Xander laughed, leaning over the railings, and reaching over to ruffle my hair. "Don't you understand?"
"O-Of course I don't."
"Dummy."
"Dummy."
"We're both dummies. How does that sound?"
"...you've...got a point."
Xander laughed. "We're kinda stupid aren't we?"
"T-That's not really a question," I laughed small, eyes resting on the one I Love. And strangely, his eyes did too.
"I just wanted you to know that...
The reason why we have matching rings on our fingers isn't because we're married—
It's because I'll be there for you for the rest of your life. And the reason why I proposed to you was because I am sure—
I am sure you'd be there too.
No matter what.
The rest of your life."
I swallowed the lump at the back of my throat, trying my best to contain the emotions that threatened to take the reins of my heart.
"I-I'm sorry...it's just...I..." Sniff.
"That we don't have both our parents?"
I bit my lip.
How did he know?
Trust me, seeing my parents' married life crumble to pieces wasn't a perfect example of what I thought was Love," Xander laughed, and I did, too.
"I think we both know the bad side of marriage."
"It...it doesn't always work out, does it?" I laughed sheepishly, rubbing my eyes and sniffling once more.
"Yeah."
There was a moment of silence, in which neither of us seemed to mind; and both of us were quite comfortable with.
"Besides the fact that I hate my father," Xander said after a while, "I'd like to see you every day."
I jumped, blushing furiously. "U-Uwa..."
"I'd like you to be the first one I see in the morning. I'd like to share a bed with you. I'd like to eat with you. I'd like to be—"
"O-O-Okay okay! Stop it uwa," I flailed my arms around miserably, trying my best to shush Xander.
"—the luckiest, happiest man in the Universe."
Is it possible?
"I already am, actually," He laughed, taking my hand that tried to cover his mouth and caressing it softly.
I wonder if it is.
For a cup to be filled more than it can hold—
Without warning, he leaned down—as if ready for a bow—only to leave a kiss on the back of my hand.
For a heart to be filled more than it should be—
"Strawberries?" Xander smirked, and I blinked in confusion.
"Eh?"
"It's our code."
"O-Oh. For?"
I blushed hard when Xander replied, retrieving my hand quickly as glancing around as if paranoid that someone had heard that.
"X-Xander! You...you don't really need to..."
"What? It's cute. Like you," He smirked cockily, slipping his hands into his pockets. "Also, Angel, would you stop calling me Xander? It's weird."
I gave him a very incredulous look. "But that's your name, silly!"
"Ah~ but you used to call me something else...you were so cute then," My fiancé pretended to lament in disappointment.
"You're so mean!" The back of my neck felt insanely hot. "I'm going to sleep!"
Xander chuckled, his laugh low and pleasant as usual.
"Yes my angel. Rest well. Sweet dreams."
"Y-You too...Xan," I replied softly, shuffling over to the balcony door quickly—
"Sorry Angel, what did you say? I didn't quite catch that..."
"I-I said good night...Xan," I raised my voice slightly, knowing that Xander would surely hear me this time and I'd die of embarrassment.
"Hm? Angel—I know you're cute and all but sometimes I really can't hear—" He was laughing, and that was when I realized that he was just teasing me.
"Go awaaaayy!"
"It's impolite to leave after turning me on, Angel!"
To Love someone more than it is ever possible to.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
[Xander]
I spent the night pouring over the internet, searching for affordable housing near the bakery. Unfortunately, there were tons of available ones in the current city Chip and I lived in—but the ones in the next town were minute in number.
Sighing, I glanced at the bottom of my screen to check the time.
Fuck it's four.
Feeling slightly hopeless, I called for backup.
It rang once. Twice. Thrice—
"You little bitch—"
"Don't kill me, I know. I owe you big time, okay? Do you know any property agents who used to live in the town back when we were in Rivendelle?"
"You called me at fucking..." Blake paused, probably to check the time. I braced myself for the blow, "Four in the morningfor this?! I hate you."
"Oh come on," I reasoned, "You owe me one for persuading Ace to give you a second chance because you suck at doing men—"
"Says the one who has a sucky life," I could already see Blake flipping me off. "I seriously don't get why you need a property agent dude. Didn't you leave for the airport? I thought you called to like, cry."
"...I don't do that."
"Yeah right, bitch."
"Says the one who cried at the end of the Hobbit—" I laughed.
"Dude! Tauriel and Kili are my OTP, you know that."
"Blake, can you at least answer my question before launching into a full blow-by-blow explanation of why they are perfect together for the...hundredth time?"
Blake sighed, and I could hear the shuffling of sheets on the other end of the call. "Fine. Er, you remember Seth? The senior on our team that does topspin every time he serves?"
"No."
"...you see, this is why no one loves you Xander—"
"Just so you know, I'm engaged. You might wanna watch out," I warned playfully, only to receive a shocked pause from my best friend.
When there was silence on the other side of the call for a longer-than-necessary time, I prompted him with a 'what'.
"You...? Xander...? Er, you didn't get engaged with that bitch Trudy, did you...?"
"What the fuck Blake," I snorted, "Did you really think I was that sort of person?"
"How would I know? Your dad pushed you to a corner. Chip left you a freaking letter to say that you guys were done!" Blake hissed in confusion. "And I thought my life was messed up."
"I guess...miracles happen," I smiled to no one in particular.
Being the only friend who stayed in my life for more than a month, Blake seemed to understand what I meant without asking.
"Then I'm glad it did. 'Grats dude, you guys deserve to be happy together."
How long has it been since anyone has told us that?
I've spent so many years seeking approval—acceptance of us being together from the people around me;
That when I hear this, I feel...
Somewhat, relieved.
I laughed. "Be honored that you're the first one I told."
"Yeah, yeah, super," Blake remarked sarcastically. "Do you want to know about Seth or not?"
"Fine, yes."
"I caught up with him a couple of weeks ago. Met him at a bar when Ace and I were...hanging out."
"Hanging out," I repeated with a smirk.
"He told me he's pretty busy lately. Passed me a business card. He might be able to help you guys," Blake suggested, ignoring my tease. "Not sure though."
"Great. Send me a picture of the card?"
"Doing it after you drop the call."
"Thanks. Saved," I sighed in sincere gratitude.
"I don't see how you're saved, Xander..." Blake continued uneasily. "Your dad's not gonna let you off just like that. You know what I mean."
I nodded silently.
"I'll figure it out. Gonna resign soon by the way—sorry for leaving you alone in that stupid company."
"I've got Ace as my secretary," Blake emphasized jokingly. "I don't need you."
"Well you'll be needing me as your advisor since you, again, suck at doing—"
"Okay, okay! Shut up, good God," My best friend interrupted with a groan. "Conclusion; you're going to be a househusband?"
"I don't think I can afford that if I want Giselle to have an eye surgery. Besides, I'm not gonna let my angel carry all that financial burden on his own, am I? We have to share it in the very least..."
Blake laughed loudly. "Someone has grown up."
"Don't be a bitch."
"Hey, I'm nice," Blake retorted, "I was going to say that our coach in High school retired. He's looking for someone to replace him in Rivendelle."
I blinked.
"Seriously? Um, but I'm not certified or anything..."
"Just give him a call. He wouldn't forget our god-like ace named Xander stupid Jaxon," The ex-captain of the volleyball team teased bitterly.
"Don't have his number."
"...you freaking loner."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Loner?
I can't possibly disagree, can I?
What's this, then?
That I am no longer alone?
And even if I am,
I can—
With faith and conviction say:
That perhaps, I'm not lonely at all.
My angel
Do you know why?
Because when there is Love;
You will never be lonely even if you are alone.
I will be here.
I am here.
Even if I am not.
End of Beyond Love Chapter 2. Continue reading Chapter 3 or return to Beyond Love book page.