Beyond the Trap of Yesterday - Chapter 35: Chapter 35
You are reading Beyond the Trap of Yesterday, Chapter 35: Chapter 35. Read more chapters of Beyond the Trap of Yesterday.
Zara's pov
"Hurry your ass up, I wanna see the beach" I yell to Matt and Enzo who are asleep on the jet
Ava and I are way too excited to sleep right now, the whole flight we have talked about what we're going to do here
We have a whole week here, never in my life would I have thought I would be in Hawaii
Ava and I have dreamed to come here but we don't have enough money to be throwing at Hawaii
So the fact Enzo just...did this for Christmas
And Matt for Ava...
Like it's no big deal is just insane to me
Guess that's the life of being rich
"I'm going I'm going" Enzo huffs not moving from his seat
I unbuckle the seat belt and grab his hand trying to pry him off the airplane seat
But the man is 6'3 and is packing on the muscles so he doesn't even move a centimeter despite me using all my muscles trying to move him
He chuckles
"Stop laughing and get up...pleaseeeeee," I say pouting
He grabs my hips and moved me so I'm straddling him
"I'm too tired" he mumbles while pulling me closely
I cup his face "you can sleep when we arrive at the beach house while Ava and I explore, come on get up please" I say kissing the top of his nose
Matt is awake now and carrying a sleeping Mia, while Ava is waiting for me to wake up this dumbass
Okay fine, he wants to act like a little boy....
"Come on open your eyes Fichetto," I say with a smirk knowing he hates that nickname (pretty boy)
He immediately opens his eyes and pouts like a little boy
And I laugh
"See was that so hard to do," I say laughing
He mumbles a "shush it princess, and stop moving damn it"
"I'll stop when you get up, come on" I slap his chest
"If you weren't so cute, and anyone else I would've thrown you off the plane for not letting me sleep" he huffs
I laugh a little "your cute too " I say kissing the tip of his nose
"Come on get up now you big baby, We're in Hawaii" I say excitedly
He huffs before standing up while I'm still straddling him so I try getting off but he says "no I wanna carry you stop it" he says annoyed
I laugh and put my arms around his neck and nuzzle myself closer to him
I feel him supporting me up by placing his hands on my ass and I just roll my eyes to myself
I ended up falling asleep nuzzled close to Enzo while we drove around 40 minutes to the private beach house...well more like a mansion
I woke up to someone kissing that one spot near my ear
All I do is hum and Enzo chuckles
"She's awake" He exclaims to me sarcastically
"Now who's asleep and won't get up" I hear his deep chuckle
I mumble a 'shut up' and he laughs
"Come on were at the house I'm sure your gonna wanna look around" he whispers in my ear
"You know you whispering in my ear like that makes me wanna just go back to sleep" I huff
He chuckles once again "you like when I talk like this?" He questions getting close to my ear whispering once again and kissing the tip of my ear
"Stop it," I say as his voice Sends my body into shivers
"I'll stop when you get up and open your eyes," he says and I can hear the smirk in his voice
I open my eyes "see that wasn't so hard to do" he smirks
That asshole is doing what i did to him on the plane
"Whatever" I mumble getting out of his arms
"Come on I'll show you around" he chuckles while taking my hand in his
The house is absolutely beautiful, it has a ton of windows to let as much fresh air in as possible and light, Which is helpful to me and I'll most likely not get any nightmares and panic attacks here...though I can't control that light rooms help
Everything in the house is so spacious and nice
It's mostly white with accents of green plants everywhere and basket type material chairs and other things, and a bunch of flowers everywhere
I look outside to see a private beach and there's a pool and jacuzzi closer to the house
There's also a beautiful area for a bonfire
"we can make s'mores outside" Ava says excitedly
"Sure thing if you like sticky shit all over your fingers" Matt mumbles
"Oh shut up! Your a sticky little shit, S'mores are great" Ava says
"Plus I don't mind getting messy" Ava laughs
Enzo and I laugh while Matt rolls his eyes
"Anyway..." I say
"So where's the rooms?" I ask Enzo
He takes my hand and leads me up the stairs
There are 3 rooms on this side of the house and a bunch on the opposite side as well
He put Mia's things in one room because "she's a big girl and wants to sleep alone" as she put it
And Ava and Matt are sharing a room
"We can share this or I can just take the room on the other side of the house," he says
Like I'm gonna pass up an opportunity for cuddling closer to this Fichetto (pretty boy)
"We can share," I say Calmly
While I'm jumping up and down excited on the inside
This man makes me feel so safe that I can fall asleep within minutes when being cuddled close to him
"Alright, I'll bring our stuff here," he says
"Okay I'll go make us something to eat, I heard Matt say it's stocked with a ton of stuff," I say walking down the stairs with Enzo behind me
"Yeah I had people stock up everything before we came" he smiles and kisses my forehead
"Thank you again, I know I keep saying that but this is the best present I could've ever been given," I say starting to tear up
He pulls me into a hug "anything for you" he muffled into my hair
And I just internally died
"Anything?" I ask
"Pretty much yeah," he says
Well shit...
"So if I ask for a flamingo I can have a flamingo?" I say eyebrows raised
"Well I'd prefer you not have one...and I don't think it's legal to own one but I can take you to the flamingo beach" he laughs
"Your kidding!" I say grinning
"No" he laughs
"You wanna go? I can take you tomorrow" he smiles
"Hell yeah, I wanna go!!!" I say excited
"Ok it's a date," he says kissing my forehead before walking to the car to get our luggage
Wait...? Holy crap, I'm going on a date...in Hawaii, with Enzo!!
"AVA...pstttt" I call her over to me when I walk into the kitchen and see her
"What?" She laughs
"I'm going on a date with Enzo to a freaking flamingo beach," I say half shocked half jumping for joy
"YOUR LYING, There's a freaking flamingo beach?" She exclaims
"HELLO, Ignore the flamingo beach for now did you hear what I said about the date" I say
"Yeah yeah yeah...like I said you guys act like a married couple so this doesn't surprise me...but what does is the flamingo beach, Like hello I want to see some damn flamingos" she says
I roll my eyes " you and Matt can always go to it later in the week as a date" I smile
She gasps "omg your right, I'll be back I need to go annoy him about this, have fun on your date!" She squeals
I laugh
And then freeze...shit what I forgot about this whole beach thing is the Bikinis and stuff
I love my body don't get me wrong, but the scarring from my parents cutting me Mixed with my attempt to take my life by stabbing myself in the side...it all left scars and sometimes I feel slightly less beautiful because of it no matter what I try telling myself
I remember I was bleeding but I was for some reason fine
So I went to the library after I stabbed my self thinking I would die and then I fainted from blood loss
An ambulance was called and then my parents
They got pissed that a 'girl who was blessed in having such a great life with living in a mansion and shit' was trying to kill herself...
They didn't let me eat for 4 days after that
And I got my punishment as well for trying to kill myself...
Shit I don't want Enzo to see, living in New York has given me an excuse to not have to wear revealing clothing cus it's usually not that hot
But here...no way in hell can I make an excuse
He will see my scars and ask
And I'm not quite ready to say anything yet
I think I can try talking about me trying to kill myself but that will lead to why? Because everyone will always question
And I'm just so scared to tell him about my parents
It's not that I don't trust him...I just don't want him thinking differently of me
I have managed to keep all my scars from Ava for 4 years...
But I think this trip is when she will find out about them and I'm very scared
I love and trust Ava but I didn't want her seeing me different and as some broken person she needs to walk around on eggshells for
The whole night after we eat and then sit outside by the bonfire I think about what I'll say to Enzo, Ava, and Matt when they see my scars
Do I tell them the truth? Do I lie
Do I say a half-truth...is this vacation the time when everyone will find out the truth about my past
I'm not ready...I want to have a good time without having this dark cloud upon us all after they find out
"Hey, you okay? You spaced out there for a second" Enzo asks his voice laced with some concern and confusion
Shit was I?
"Yeah, I'm fine...I just never thought I'd be here you know? It seems all fake" I smile
And I didn't lie necessarily I am shocked I'm here
But obviously, that's not the reason I spaced at this moment
He laughs "well you are so get used to it for the next week," he says pulling me into his lap
I lean into him and close my eyes as I feel the breeze through the air and the smell of burnt marshmallows
Note to self...don't let Matteo make s'mores he will end up burning the marshmallows each time...
"MATTEO, That's another damn marshmallow waisted" Ava exclaims
"Look even little Mia can make a s'more without burning the marshmallow" Ava rolls her eyes while laughing
We all laugh
"Whatever it's not my fault they just burn" Matt says throwing the stick giving up on the marshmallows
I laugh but in the back of my head I'm still thinking and scared
What will Enzo think of me when he finds out about my past?
Will he leave when he sees my scars?
I was able to find a way to make the cuts, not scar after a long time but the older cuts left scars so I have to live with those for the rest of my life...
The rest of the night is filled with laughter, s'mores, talks about what we will do here, and then saying goodnight to each other and going to bed
As I lay in bed and nuzzle closely to Enzo I hope that he doesn't ask about my cuts
But he will...anyone would stare or assume and ask no matter what you say
We're humans, we judge, wonder, and ask
I just hope that he doesn't ask too much to the point I need to tell him about my parents on this trip
Not yet, not in Hawaii
"Hurry your ass up, I wanna see the beach" I yell to Matt and Enzo who are asleep on the jet
Ava and I are way too excited to sleep right now, the whole flight we have talked about what we're going to do here
We have a whole week here, never in my life would I have thought I would be in Hawaii
Ava and I have dreamed to come here but we don't have enough money to be throwing at Hawaii
So the fact Enzo just...did this for Christmas
And Matt for Ava...
Like it's no big deal is just insane to me
Guess that's the life of being rich
"I'm going I'm going" Enzo huffs not moving from his seat
I unbuckle the seat belt and grab his hand trying to pry him off the airplane seat
But the man is 6'3 and is packing on the muscles so he doesn't even move a centimeter despite me using all my muscles trying to move him
He chuckles
"Stop laughing and get up...pleaseeeeee," I say pouting
He grabs my hips and moved me so I'm straddling him
"I'm too tired" he mumbles while pulling me closely
I cup his face "you can sleep when we arrive at the beach house while Ava and I explore, come on get up please" I say kissing the top of his nose
Matt is awake now and carrying a sleeping Mia, while Ava is waiting for me to wake up this dumbass
Okay fine, he wants to act like a little boy....
"Come on open your eyes Fichetto," I say with a smirk knowing he hates that nickname (pretty boy)
He immediately opens his eyes and pouts like a little boy
And I laugh
"See was that so hard to do," I say laughing
He mumbles a "shush it princess, and stop moving damn it"
"I'll stop when you get up, come on" I slap his chest
"If you weren't so cute, and anyone else I would've thrown you off the plane for not letting me sleep" he huffs
I laugh a little "your cute too " I say kissing the tip of his nose
"Come on get up now you big baby, We're in Hawaii" I say excitedly
He huffs before standing up while I'm still straddling him so I try getting off but he says "no I wanna carry you stop it" he says annoyed
I laugh and put my arms around his neck and nuzzle myself closer to him
I feel him supporting me up by placing his hands on my ass and I just roll my eyes to myself
I ended up falling asleep nuzzled close to Enzo while we drove around 40 minutes to the private beach house...well more like a mansion
I woke up to someone kissing that one spot near my ear
All I do is hum and Enzo chuckles
"She's awake" He exclaims to me sarcastically
"Now who's asleep and won't get up" I hear his deep chuckle
I mumble a 'shut up' and he laughs
"Come on were at the house I'm sure your gonna wanna look around" he whispers in my ear
"You know you whispering in my ear like that makes me wanna just go back to sleep" I huff
He chuckles once again "you like when I talk like this?" He questions getting close to my ear whispering once again and kissing the tip of my ear
"Stop it," I say as his voice Sends my body into shivers
"I'll stop when you get up and open your eyes," he says and I can hear the smirk in his voice
I open my eyes "see that wasn't so hard to do" he smirks
That asshole is doing what i did to him on the plane
"Whatever" I mumble getting out of his arms
"Come on I'll show you around" he chuckles while taking my hand in his
The house is absolutely beautiful, it has a ton of windows to let as much fresh air in as possible and light, Which is helpful to me and I'll most likely not get any nightmares and panic attacks here...though I can't control that light rooms help
Everything in the house is so spacious and nice
It's mostly white with accents of green plants everywhere and basket type material chairs and other things, and a bunch of flowers everywhere
I look outside to see a private beach and there's a pool and jacuzzi closer to the house
There's also a beautiful area for a bonfire
"we can make s'mores outside" Ava says excitedly
"Sure thing if you like sticky shit all over your fingers" Matt mumbles
"Oh shut up! Your a sticky little shit, S'mores are great" Ava says
"Plus I don't mind getting messy" Ava laughs
Enzo and I laugh while Matt rolls his eyes
"Anyway..." I say
"So where's the rooms?" I ask Enzo
He takes my hand and leads me up the stairs
There are 3 rooms on this side of the house and a bunch on the opposite side as well
He put Mia's things in one room because "she's a big girl and wants to sleep alone" as she put it
And Ava and Matt are sharing a room
"We can share this or I can just take the room on the other side of the house," he says
Like I'm gonna pass up an opportunity for cuddling closer to this Fichetto (pretty boy)
"We can share," I say Calmly
While I'm jumping up and down excited on the inside
This man makes me feel so safe that I can fall asleep within minutes when being cuddled close to him
"Alright, I'll bring our stuff here," he says
"Okay I'll go make us something to eat, I heard Matt say it's stocked with a ton of stuff," I say walking down the stairs with Enzo behind me
"Yeah I had people stock up everything before we came" he smiles and kisses my forehead
"Thank you again, I know I keep saying that but this is the best present I could've ever been given," I say starting to tear up
He pulls me into a hug "anything for you" he muffled into my hair
And I just internally died
"Anything?" I ask
"Pretty much yeah," he says
Well shit...
"So if I ask for a flamingo I can have a flamingo?" I say eyebrows raised
"Well I'd prefer you not have one...and I don't think it's legal to own one but I can take you to the flamingo beach" he laughs
"Your kidding!" I say grinning
"No" he laughs
"You wanna go? I can take you tomorrow" he smiles
"Hell yeah, I wanna go!!!" I say excited
"Ok it's a date," he says kissing my forehead before walking to the car to get our luggage
Wait...? Holy crap, I'm going on a date...in Hawaii, with Enzo!!
"AVA...pstttt" I call her over to me when I walk into the kitchen and see her
"What?" She laughs
"I'm going on a date with Enzo to a freaking flamingo beach," I say half shocked half jumping for joy
"YOUR LYING, There's a freaking flamingo beach?" She exclaims
"HELLO, Ignore the flamingo beach for now did you hear what I said about the date" I say
"Yeah yeah yeah...like I said you guys act like a married couple so this doesn't surprise me...but what does is the flamingo beach, Like hello I want to see some damn flamingos" she says
I roll my eyes " you and Matt can always go to it later in the week as a date" I smile
She gasps "omg your right, I'll be back I need to go annoy him about this, have fun on your date!" She squeals
I laugh
And then freeze...shit what I forgot about this whole beach thing is the Bikinis and stuff
I love my body don't get me wrong, but the scarring from my parents cutting me Mixed with my attempt to take my life by stabbing myself in the side...it all left scars and sometimes I feel slightly less beautiful because of it no matter what I try telling myself
I remember I was bleeding but I was for some reason fine
So I went to the library after I stabbed my self thinking I would die and then I fainted from blood loss
An ambulance was called and then my parents
They got pissed that a 'girl who was blessed in having such a great life with living in a mansion and shit' was trying to kill herself...
They didn't let me eat for 4 days after that
And I got my punishment as well for trying to kill myself...
Shit I don't want Enzo to see, living in New York has given me an excuse to not have to wear revealing clothing cus it's usually not that hot
But here...no way in hell can I make an excuse
He will see my scars and ask
And I'm not quite ready to say anything yet
I think I can try talking about me trying to kill myself but that will lead to why? Because everyone will always question
And I'm just so scared to tell him about my parents
It's not that I don't trust him...I just don't want him thinking differently of me
I have managed to keep all my scars from Ava for 4 years...
But I think this trip is when she will find out about them and I'm very scared
I love and trust Ava but I didn't want her seeing me different and as some broken person she needs to walk around on eggshells for
The whole night after we eat and then sit outside by the bonfire I think about what I'll say to Enzo, Ava, and Matt when they see my scars
Do I tell them the truth? Do I lie
Do I say a half-truth...is this vacation the time when everyone will find out the truth about my past
I'm not ready...I want to have a good time without having this dark cloud upon us all after they find out
"Hey, you okay? You spaced out there for a second" Enzo asks his voice laced with some concern and confusion
Shit was I?
"Yeah, I'm fine...I just never thought I'd be here you know? It seems all fake" I smile
And I didn't lie necessarily I am shocked I'm here
But obviously, that's not the reason I spaced at this moment
He laughs "well you are so get used to it for the next week," he says pulling me into his lap
I lean into him and close my eyes as I feel the breeze through the air and the smell of burnt marshmallows
Note to self...don't let Matteo make s'mores he will end up burning the marshmallows each time...
"MATTEO, That's another damn marshmallow waisted" Ava exclaims
"Look even little Mia can make a s'more without burning the marshmallow" Ava rolls her eyes while laughing
We all laugh
"Whatever it's not my fault they just burn" Matt says throwing the stick giving up on the marshmallows
I laugh but in the back of my head I'm still thinking and scared
What will Enzo think of me when he finds out about my past?
Will he leave when he sees my scars?
I was able to find a way to make the cuts, not scar after a long time but the older cuts left scars so I have to live with those for the rest of my life...
The rest of the night is filled with laughter, s'mores, talks about what we will do here, and then saying goodnight to each other and going to bed
As I lay in bed and nuzzle closely to Enzo I hope that he doesn't ask about my cuts
But he will...anyone would stare or assume and ask no matter what you say
We're humans, we judge, wonder, and ask
I just hope that he doesn't ask too much to the point I need to tell him about my parents on this trip
Not yet, not in Hawaii
End of Beyond the Trap of Yesterday Chapter 35. Continue reading Chapter 36 or return to Beyond the Trap of Yesterday book page.