Burning Ice - Chapter 18: Chapter 18

Hearing Nate talk about his dad, his voice so raw, the weight of his past hanging in the air hit me harder than I expected. I never would've guessed that about him. He was so put together, so confident, like nothing could break him. But now, with the pieces of his past scattered between us, it made sense why he was the way he was.
It wasn't just the abuse that stung, it was the way he'd kept it buried for so long, carrying it on his own. I couldn't imagine living with that kind of weight, and yet, he didn't let it define him. I admired that, but I also hated how much pain he had to go through alone.
We sat there, our shared silences comfortable, our hearts a little more exposed than they had been an hour ago.
Without thinking, I found myself inviting him back to my place. "Hey, you want to come over? I know it's kind of late, but... I don't know. I just feel like I want you to be there. If you're not too tired, that is."
I watched his face closely, looking for any hesitation. But he just nodded, his expression softening. I could tell he appreciated the invitation, maybe even needed it as much as I did.
"I'd like that" he said, his voice steady, but there was a quiet vulnerability there that made my chest tighten.
The moment we stepped into my room, everything shifted. The air was thick with something unspoken, and my heart started to race in a way I hadn't expected. It was like the walls around us-around everything we'd just shared-dissolved, and there was only Nate, standing just a few feet away, looking at me with something different in his eyes.
I could feel the tension building, the way his presence was pulling me closer, as if the space between us wasn't enough anymore.
Neither of us said a word, but I could hear the rush of blood in my ears, the heat rising between us. I took a breath, and before I could think twice about it, I moved toward him.
It happened so fast. One second, we were standing there, frozen in the silence of the room, and the next, I was crashing into him.
His lips found mine in a kiss that was hungry, desperate, but still soft, like we both needed this moment.
I couldn't think, couldn't process anything other than the feel of him-his hands sliding down my back, pulling me closer, and the weight of everything that had been said between us earlier, suddenly feeling more intense. My mind told me to slow down, to think, but my body was already way ahead, urging me forward.
I kissed him back, harder, feeling the same pull he must have felt, the need to be closer, to drown in this moment. It wasn't just physical, it was everything. A mix of emotions I couldn't place, but I knew they were raw, real. His lips were like a promise, like something I couldn't ignore, no matter how much my mind tried to hold back.
I felt alive. And in that moment, that was all that mattered.
I melted into him, my back pressing against the wall as his hands roamed up my sides.
His kiss was hungry, almost desperate, like he was trying to tell me something he couldn't put into words. And I felt it-the weight of his need, his desire, the way his body pressed into mine like he couldn't get close enough.
My fingers found their way into his hair, tugging him closer, and he groaned against my lips. It sent a shiver down my spine, making my knees weak. I wanted to lose myself in him, in the way he tasted and the way his hands gripped me like he was afraid I'd disappear if he let go.
"Nate" I whispered against his mouth, my voice trembling with a mix of need and nerves. He pulled back just enough to look at me, his dark eyes smoldering with something that made my heart race.
"Say the word, Billie" he murmured, his breath hot against my lips. "Tell me to stop, and I will."
But stopping was the last thing on my mind.
I grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him back to me, letting my actions speak louder than words.
Nate's lips crashed back onto mine, and this time, there was no hesitation. He kissed me like he was trying to consume me, and I let him, losing myself in the heat and urgency of it all. His hands slid under my shirt, his touch rough and deliberate, leaving trails of fire on my skin.
I arched into him, a soft gasp escaping me as his fingers traced the curve of my waist.
My heart thundered in my chest, each beat louder than the last. Everything else faded - the room, the world outside until there was only him, his lips, his hands, his body pressing into mine.
"Nate" I breathed again, his name a soft plea on my lips. He pulled back just enough to look at me, his forehead resting against mine, his breaths coming fast and uneven.
His eyes burned into mine, and for a moment, the intensity of his gaze stole my breath.
"You drive me crazy, Billie," he said, his voice low and rough, each word dripping with raw honesty. "Do you have any idea what you do to me?"
I didn't answer, I couldn't. My brain felt like
it was short circuiting and unable to keep up with the way my body reacted to him.
Instead, I tugged his shirt up, needing to feel more of him, needing him closer. He didn't hesitate, shrugging it off in one smooth motion before his hands were back on me, his mouth finding my neck.
The heat of his lips against my skin sent a jolt of electricity through me, and I gasped, my fingers gripping his shoulders for balance. I could feel him smiling against me, a satisfied hum vibrating through his chest.
"Tell me to stop" he murmured again, his voice barely above a whisper, though I could hear the challenge in his tone.
"Don't you dare" I shot back, and his low chuckle rumbled through me, equal parts infuriating and intoxicating.
His lips found mine again, and I was gone, completely lost in him, in this moment, in the way he made me feel like the only thing in the world that mattered.
Nate's hands never left me as we stumbled toward the bed, our mouths locked like we were afraid to let go. Every kiss felt like it was pulling me deeper under, his lips moving against mine with a heat that made my head spin. By the time the back of my knees hit the edge of the mattress, I wasn't sure where I ended and he began.
I fell back onto the bed, and Nate followed, his weight pressing me into the mattress in a way that made my heart race. His hands braced on either side of me, his dark eyes roaming my face like he was memorizing every detail. His hair was a mess from where l'd been gripping it, and the sight sent a rush of heat through me.
"You're too good to be real," he murmured, his voice low and rough, like he couldn't quite believe I was here. His fingers brushed a strand of hair from my face, lingering against my cheek, and for a moment, the intensity of his gaze made it impossible to breathe.
"Nate" was all I could whisper right now, my voice barely audible, but it was enough to bring him back to me. His lips curved into a small, knowing smile, and then he was kissing me again, slower this time.
It wasn't the same frantic, desperate need as before, this was something deeper, something that made me feel like I was unraveling under his touch. His lips trailed from my mouth to my jaw, then lower, brushing over the sensitive skin of my neck and collarbone. Each kiss sent a shiver through me, my body arching instinctively toward him.
His hand slid under my shirt, the roughness of his palm against my skin igniting every nerve in my body. I let out a soft gasp, my fingers digging into his shoulders as his lips continued their slow, torturous path.
It wasn't the same frantic, desperate need as before-this was something deeper, something that made me feel like I was unraveling under his touch. His lips trailed from my mouth to my jaw, then lower, brushing over the sensitive skin of my neck and collarbone. Each kiss sent a shiver through me, my body arching instinctively toward him.
His hand slid under my shirt, the roughness of his palm against my skin igniting every nerve in my body. I let out a soft gasp, my fingers digging into his shoulders as his lips continued their slow, torturous path.
He paused, lifting his head to look at me, his eyes dark and searching.
"Are you sure, Billie?" he asked, his voice softer now, threaded with something that almost sounded like vulnerability.
My heart clenched at the way he looked at me, like I was the only thing that mattered. I reached up, cupping his face in my hands, and pulled him down for another kiss, letting the answer pour from my lips to his.
"I'm sure" I nodded my head against his mouth, and that was all it took for him to let go.
The moment I said it, something shifted between us. Nate's restraint cracked, and the raw need in his kiss sent my head spinning. His hands moved with purpose, skimming over my body as if he couldn't get enough, couldn't hold me close enough.
Every touch was electric, igniting something in me I didn't know was there.
My fingers fumbled with the hem of his shirt, tugging it higher until he helped me pull it over his head. The sight of him-bare, strong, his chest rising and falling as he looked down at me-stole my breath. For a moment, he just stared, his eyes roaming over me like he was trying to memorize every inch.
"You're so beautiful" he murmured, his voice rough and reverent, and the honesty in his tone made my cheeks burn.
I reached for him, pulling him back to me, needing to feel the heat of his skin against mine. His weight pressed me into the mattress as his lips found mine again, slow and deliberate, each kiss unraveling me further. His hands slid under my shirt, pushing it higher, his fingers brushing over my ribs in a way that made me shiver.
When he pulled the fabric over my head, I suddenly felt exposed, vulnerable under his intense gaze. But Nate didn't hesitate. His eyes softened as he leaned down, pressing a kiss to my shoulder, then to the hollow of my throat, his lips lingering like he wanted to savor every second.
"You're perfect" he whispered, his voice low and full of something I couldn't quite name. The way he looked at me, like I was something sacred, made my heart ache.
I tangled my fingers in his hair, pulling him closer as his kisses trailed lower, each one leaving me breathless. Every touch, every movement, was deliberate, like he was trying to tell me something he couldn't say with words. And I felt it-how much he wanted me, how much he cared, how much this moment meant to him.
Being with Nate felt like stepping into something I didn't fully understand yet, something bigger than either of us. But I didn't care. Right now, all I wanted was him, and the way he made me feel like I was the only person in the world.
Nate's lips trailed over my skin, igniting a fire that burned hotter with every touch. His hands moved over me with a mix of urgency and care, like he was afraid he'd break me if he pushed too hard but couldn't stop himself from exploring every inch. My body responded to him instinctively, arching toward him, needing more, wanting more.
"Billie" he breathed against my neck, his voice hoarse, his breath hot against my skin. My name on his lips sounded like a promise, and it sent a shiver racing down my spine. His hands slid lower, his fingers teasing and deliberate, leaving me trembling beneath him.
I wrapped my legs around him, pulling him closer, desperate to feel the weight of him, the heat of him. He groaned at the contact, his lips finding mine again in a kiss that was all-consuming. There was nothing soft about it-this was hunger, raw and unrestrained, and I matched his intensity, my hands roaming over his back, gripping him like he was the only solid thing in my world.
Time seemed to blur as we lost ourselves in each other, our movements growing more frantic. His name slipped from my lips in a broken whisper, and I felt the tension in him snap. Nate's control shattered, and he moved with a purpose that left no room for doubt.
Every touch, every kiss, every whispered word built the tension higher, until there was nothing left but him and me and the overwhelming heat of the moment. My heart raced, my breath came in short gasps, and I surrendered completely, letting myself fall into him, into this.
Nates mouth explored my body, resting on my neck as he sucked and nibbled at the skin. It sent shivers throughout my body. His hands found the mound of my breast and he wasted no time latching his cold palms onto my burning skin. I felt myself arch into him, craving more of his touch.
One rough hand traveled down my stomach and rested for a moment. He was unsure but I just wanted him to take control. I nodded my head frantically in desperation. I never knew I needed something so bad. He moved under my clothing and slid one finger into me without a second thought.
"Fuck" was all I could mutter under my breath. Nates eyes full of lust and control found mine in a sharp dagger.
"Look at me" he commanded.
Another finger. I didn't break eye contact. He was getting off on watching my face contort under his pleasure. I rolled my head back as he upped his speed into my core, the moan that was escaping from my body sounded unnatural.
"I need all of you. Right now" it was my turn to command him now.
Nate wasted no time in stripping his pants off. I wasted no time stripping off mine as well. It was as if my body was hungry. Hungry for him.
Nate positioned himself just above me. My heart was beating so fast I could hear it in my ears. He looked at me one more time, there was no going back after this.
———
I turned my head slightly, still in the warmth of the sheets, and I could feel Nate's presence beside me. He hadn't left, and that reality settled deep in my chest. His arm was draped loosely over me, his body still close enough that I could feel the heat of his skin against mine, even in the quiet of the morning. I hadn't expected him to stay. Part of me had braced for the inevitable, where everything would slip back into its place, and we would return to our separate worlds.
But Nate was still here. And for some reason, that comforted me more than it should have.
His breathing was steady, but there was something about the way he held me, like he didn't want to let go either. I could tell that he wasn't the kind of man who easily let down his guard, but in this moment, with his face relaxed and his hand resting against my skin, he seemed... different. Vulnerable, even. It made my heart beat a little faster, the realization that I wasn't the only one carrying the weight of what had happened between us.
I didn't know where this was going. I wasn't sure what it meant yet or if I was ready for it, or if he was but as I lay there, I knew one thing: I wasn't alone in this. Whatever this was, whatever came next, Nate had made it clear he wasn't going anywhere.
And, for the first time in a long while, I was okay with that.