Convoke - Chapter 23: Chapter 23

During Tom's shift, Ezra sat at the bar, staying close in case more demons entered. The pub was dead on a Thursday afternoon. Tom often stood alone on the other side of the bar. His father was doing more mundane tasks, like cleaning their home upstairs. His mother was out with friends. His sister was out at the park with his cousin, and Gerry was at work. Tom had avoided him before he left, though the dread of seeing him in the evening lingered.
At least he was working to distract himself, with a good-looking demon paying him more attention than he could handle. When Ezra would finish his drink, Tom would pour him another, and Ezra would hold it before Tom could put it down, brushing their fingers so subtly, the few locals scattered around the building didn't notice.
But Tom noticed, especially the way Ezra's head would drop shyly, to hide the colour burning up his pale cheeks. He was flirting back. Their hug had given him the hint Tom so desperately tried to drop. Though, with it came the heavy subject of how they would date. Prejudice would prevail. Tom would be gossiped about, and Ezra would be treated more unjustly than he already was. His parents might be very shocked about his partner not only being a demon, but a male demon. Tom wasn't too concerned about them disapproving on his bisexuality, he predicted their acceptance. He wasn't sure if they would be disappointed by him choosing a demon. They liked Ezra, but they would be undoubtedly worried for his safety.
Tom rubbed the ring finger on his left hand. The demon mark from their contract had barely left his skin now that Ezra was nearby. He wore a black ring over it, to hide it from prying eyes, though it still tingled, reminding Tom of his full name, Ezrakhell.
That evening, when Tom was ready to sleep, Ezra lingered by the bottom of his bed, chewing on the inside of his lip and staring at the empty space next to him. Tom pulled the duvet away and patted the bedsheet. "Come on."
Ezra accepted the invitation and laid down next to him. Tom shared the duvet and turned off the light. The curtain wasn't fully closed, and the moon casted the shape of leaves and branches on the wall. He stared with bright eyes at the ceiling. Ezra most likely did the same. Nobody moved for a while, until Tom rolled over to face his desk, hoping Ezra would then feel comfortable enough to go to sleep.
Tom woke through the night only once. Ezra's face was close. His eyes were closed, his lips slightly parted, and his breathing moving like an old, overworked machine, in and out, in and out. Tom stared at him, liking how they had been pulled towards each other in their sleep.
Their hands were both tucked by their chins, and their little fingers were barely a centimetre apart. Tom inched it closer, touching Ezra's skin. His body reacted to his touch by shivering. Tom closed his eyes and was thankfully tired enough to fall sleep quickly, missing Ezra opening his eyes to stare at their touching fingers.
The days went by the same- Ezra would linger in the pub, they would go to the library late, and sleep side by side in Tom's room. Demons visited the pub and watched Tom from afar when he was in the village, but soon they left him alone and soon, Ezra talked about not having to be so close all the time.
"I will leave you to sleep alone tonight," he said, on a cold evening. A new moon was only a night away, and silver light flowed through the gaps in the curtains on the long library windows. Tom switched on the light, feeling the lingering calmness from the angel's choir practice only an hour ago.
"You don't have to sleep in the bushes now that it's getting warmer-"
"No, I mean that I'll go back to where I was sleeping before. I don't think you're in any danger anymore. No demons have followed you in a week."
"Oh." Tom gulped back his disappointment. How could he tell him that his favourite time of day was when they laid silently next to each other on his bed? "Okay." Tom watched him take books from the nearest shelf that they had stacked close by from the previous night. He sat at the table and flicked through the ones he had almost finished.
Tom hovered, the way his words hovered at the back of his throat. He wanted to be with Ezra all the time. He thought about him constantly. He wanted to tell him that he was starting to like him more than a friend, and he wanted to say that he had noticed that maybe Ezra felt the same.
I'm a coward, he thought, and slumped in the chair next to him.
"What's the matter?" Ezra asked, not looking up from his book.
"Nothing," Tom said quickly.
"You don't have to be here. If you're bored of-"
"I'm not bored. I like being here . . . with you."
Ezra tilted his head, watching him from the corner of his eye. He closed his book and slowly linked fingers over the back of the chair, facing Tom. "Can I ask you a personal question?" His voice was quiet, nervous even.
"Of course."
Ezra rubbed his lips together. He looked away at first, but forced their gazes to lock when he asked, "Why are you single? You said you dated someone before. I don't understand why you of all people would suffer a break-up." Tom blinked with surprise. "I'm sorry, it's none of my business." Ezra moved to open his book again, but Tom softly touched the back of his hand.
"It's okay, I don't mind." He smiled as warmly as he could. "I was dating this girl for three years, but she cheated on me with my best friend . . . not Cal, obviously." Tom stared distantly at the wooden table. "We broke up a year ago now."
A hand moved to his shoulder and rested on it. Ezra watched him with large sad eyes, squeezing his shoulder for comfort. "I'm sorry someone did that to you."
"It's okay, I'm over it now."
"It's not okay." Ezra's hand smoothed up his shoulder until his thumb touched Tom's neck. It rubbed gently against him; a motion that made Tom want to collapse into him. "You really didn't deserve that."
"For a while I thought I did. I thought maybe I had done something wrong, or I hadn't treated her right. But really, she just didn't love me very much." Tom shrugged, and Ezra's hand didn't move.
"She wronged you. I hope they're rotting somewhere cold, being miserable with each other."
Tom smiled. "That's what Cal said."
"You don't think the same?"
"No. I hope that my heart was broken for something. If they're unhappy now, then what was the point?"
Ezra stared as if Tom's loving heart had only just come into the light. His hand lifted from Tom's shoulder, touching his cheek with his thumb too. Tom sat deathly still, holding his breath as Ezra's other fingers touched the side of his face, and he was leaning forwards while staring at his mouth, until he suddenly pulled away and turned away like he had done something wrong.
Tom grabbed his arm and pushed his knees into the side of his leg. "Don't be shy. It's okay Ezra."
Ezra shook his head. "This can't . . . we can't . . ." He paused, frustrated with himself. "It wouldn't work between us."
"Why not? I think it could." Tom pulled on his arm, but Ezra still wouldn't look at him.
"You've been through enough pain already."
"You wouldn't hurt me-"
"Stop forgetting that I'm a demon."
"Actually, that's all I think about." Ezra finally tilted his head towards him, so Tom continued. "I know this would be hard. People would judge it, but I don't care what people think."
Ezra frowned, and angrily turned around in his chair, slotting their legs together. His frown was deep, and his eyes suddenly dark. "A murderer," he said deeply. "That's what they call me."
Tom stared with wide blue eyes. "Is that why you're a soul stripper?" he whispered with a struggling heart, and Ezra nodded. "What happened?"
"It doesn't matter what happened, that's what I'm accused of, and this is who I am. You won't just be judged for being with a demon, you will be judged for being with a soul stripper demon who-" Ezra clenched his hands to fists, staring down to inhale a breath that sounded painful. "My life is one long miserable punishment. Someone with a soul as perfect as yours doesn't deserve to be poisoned by mine."
Tom tried to take his hand, but Ezra pushed his chair back, distancing himself. Tom had seen soul strippers over the years, and they all did their job is if that was what they deserved and saving humans from violent demons was paying for their evils. But Ezra was bitter, and sad, and mournful for all the demons who unjustly lost their lives. "You're innocent, aren't you?" He blurted and Ezra's frown wavered. "You said that you were accused of murder. You didn't do it, and that's why you're searching so hard to find the cause of all the violence towards other demons."
Ezra's bottom lip quivered. "That doesn't matter anymore," he said quietly as the anger within him turned into a dull, cold agony. "I'll be a soul stripper for the rest of my life, regardless of whether I'm innocent or not."
Tom stood up with a screech of wood against wood. Ezra dropped his head and closed his eyes, expecting Tom to walk away. He gasped when Tom leaned over him and hugged him tightly.
"Why do you always hug me when I tell you shitty things about myself?"
"Wanting to punch Gerry in the face is not a shitty thing," Tom said into his shoulder. "If you don't want to tell me about what happened, then I'll do my own research. I know you enough to know that you would be honest if you were guilty. But you're not, are you?" Ezra shook his head against his hair to say no. He stood up, and hugged Tom back, putting his arms where they once were, around his shoulders.
"It still wouldn't work between us."
"Why not?" Tom asked, blinking back his tears.
"Because you still deserve better than me."