Dating Mr. CEO - Chapter 20: Chapter 20

ELROY
I was nervous, and I could tell because my hands were shaking, an embarrassing act my body pulled whenever I was nervous. Whenever my heart couldn't stop pumping gulps of blood into my veins.
The funniest part was that, Fay was beginning to notice it... I couldn't even pick up the fork. We had been served our dinner, few minutes ago. But I kept  griping the glass of water to try and calm my unsteady heart. I honestly didn't understand why I was nervous.
I mean, this was Fay... The normal, annoying girlfriend anyone could possibly wish for. I had been dating her for years. So why the hell does it feel like I was on a date with my long time crush?
This is odd.
"Why aren't you eating? I thought you were hungry?" She asked, swallowing the food she placed in her mouth before speaking.
"I uh..  I am... I just um..." What do I say now? "I'm hungry... I just-"
She raised a brow. "You just what?" She asked.
I honestly didn't know what to tell her... Should I tell her how nervous I was? She'd want to know why? I didn't have the answer to that question. I myself don't have any clue as to why I was acting like a total fish outside of the sea.
"Are you okay?" She asked cautiously.
I brought the glass cup to my lips, noticing the jumping water, due to my shaky hands. I took a gulp and set the glass on the table, before pulling my hand away from her view. "I'm good."
"Okay... How did you find this place?" She asked.
When we had just arrived earlier, she looked surprised, and I knew she'd ask me this question.
"Oh... I used to come here with Yvonne. When we were still together."
She raised her brows. "So this was like your hide and hide spot?"
"Yeah... No paparazzi's in this area." I answered, picking up the fork in front of me.
"So, you don't want to be seen In public places with me? Do I embarass you that much?"
I was taken by surprise. "What? Why are you even asking that? Why would I ever be embarrassed by you... You're Fay Handerson."
"Is that the only reason why you're with me? Because I'm popular? Just like you are?" She asked... Making me wonder where she was driving at.
"No... Because I want to make us work...and because I like you and I respect our relationship, not because you get invited to the red carpet or something." I assured her.
She rolled her eyes but they soon landed on my hands. "Are you okay? Your hands are-"
"Shaking, I Know.  I'm nervous." I blurted out... Cursing my tongue silently.
She scrunched her brows. "Nervous? Why?"
I shrugged. "You're making me nervous. I honestly don't know what to do..." I said. Feeling utterly and completely stupid.
I couldn't maintain an eye to eye conversation. I was suddenly so interested in the glass of water in front of me, and my untouched food.
I sighed. "Listen, I'm not really used to going on dates and stuff... I don't know the right thing to say and I get nervous when I don't know what to do." I confessed.
I could tell she was amused... It was written all over her face.
"Okay? That's obviously a lie... You came here on dates with Yvonne."
"Four dates." I told her. "I've only been on four dates with Yvonne. And Yvonne did all the talking and stuff... With you it's different... I wanna make everything right and I fear that I might say something to piss you off."
She relaxed back on her chair, tilting her head as she watched me. "You've only been on four dates with your secret ex girlfriend?"
"Yes. It's hard to believe... I know." I muttered, losing my appetite.
"So, aside from this restaurant...  Where do you guys meet?" She asked.
Why the hell was she asking me about my ex girlfriend, on our second date together?
"I'd rather not talk about Yvonne, right now."
"Is it still a sore subject for you?" She asked.
"No. I just don't feel comfortable, discussing it with you." I said, sharply.
She scoffed. "Since when have you ever felt comfortable discussing anything with me?" She retorted angrily.
"Fay, can you just drop the subject?" I asked nicely.
"It's not a big deal. I just want to know. If your break up isn't a sore subject for you, what's so hard in telling me?" She asked.
"It's none of your business Fay, mind your freaking business." I blurted out before I could stop myself.
"You'll never stop being an asshole." She pointed out. "You're right, I should mind my own business."
After her statement, she looked away, continuing her dinner without sparing me a glance.
I gulped, feeling so disappointed.
We couldn't even get through one date. I'm indeed broken, aren't I?
FAY
I was giving him a hard time, and I knew it. Ever since we got to Russo's, the diner Elroy brought me, I had been looking for reasons to suppress my growing trust in him.
I knew I shouldn't lean in to him, or even consider giving him a chance, but I couldn't control my heart, I couldn't control how I felt. He was beginning to look even more innocent. I needed to know if he had changed or if he was just doing all these things for a reason.
I honestly couldn't take that chance. I didn't want to get hurt by him again.
My mind was giving me an option but my heart gave me a solution to this longing I felt.
I stole a glance at him to find him staring blankly at the plate in front of him. He hadn't touched his food since we got in.
He just sat there looking all defeated and lost. All the confidence I once used to admire, were gone. Leaving me with a vulnerable man... Or at least, that was what he wanted me to think... If so, then... He should try out for acting.
"Why are you doing this?" I asked him, out of nowhere.
He raised his head, locking eyes with mine. "I- I-" He stopped, then sighed before speaking again. "I screwed up. I ruined this relationship. It was all my fault. And I understand why you don't trust me. No one trusts me..." He scoffed. "Even I, don't trust myself. Listen, if you don't want to be in this relationship, that's totally fine. I don't want to drag you down along with me. We don't have to worry about Grandma, I'll find a way to explain everything to her. I'm sure she'd understand. But if-" He said.
"Hold on." Cutting him off,
I swallowed, realizing where he was going with this... "So, you- want to- break up?" My voice didn't come out as casual as I wanted it to... It came out in a shrill whisper, and I guess it was because I couldn't stop my heart from reacting to that statement.
He looked away, inhaling and exhaling.
But he didn't reply?
"Are you gonna answer me, or?"
His eyes met mine again. "Fay, you  know this better than anyone, there was never a relationship to begin with... We're only together because grandma wanted us together. We're not compatible. And I feel like you're just wasting your time with me. I'd never be the perfect boyfriend you so desire. I thought this dinner would change things between us. I thought that we could make it work but-- it isn't working, Fay. That's why I want us to-"
"Just yesterday." I said cutting him off again."... you promised grandma you'd make things better between us. Were you just bluffing?"
"That was before this dinner. But Fay-"
"I'm tired." I blurted out, not wanting him to complete his statement. I wasn't going to let him make Melissa sick again. He wasn't one to keep his promises and this only made me want to punch him in the face. I can't believe I was about to give him a chance!
I stood up. "I'm gonna go." I said, grabbing my purse from the table as I rushed outside.
The cold breeze kissed my skin as I stopped at the side of the road, waiting for a taxi.
"Fay!" Elroy called out just when I had stopped a Taxi. I was about to get in when I felt his grip on my wrist pulling me away from the car. "What are you doing?" He asked.
"Going home. Let go of me." I said, trying to set my wrist free of his grip.
He dismissed the taxi driver by handing him a bundle of money worth of passengers for a month.
When the taxi left, he turned to me again.
"That was my ride." I said, angrily.
"Did I ever complain about driving you home? Why did you leave like that? We were having a serious discussion."
I shook my head with a scoff. "You were about to break up with me."
"I wasn't. I was only stating out facts, I-"
"Facts!?" I cut him off. "You think I don't know that we're bad for each other? You think I'm not tired of you?"
He let go of my wrists, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"You didn't even let me finish my-"
I stopped him again.
"You're not only going to be hurting grandma... But thousands and thousands of people, we're going to lose  thousands and thousands of contracts and you won't even stand a chance at winning the merge program this year. We might not be the perfect and ideal couple when it's just us alone... But when it comes to the public, we're worshipped."
"I understand that, okay? But it's not a matter of what the public thinks. All that matters is what we want. That's not even the case. What I'm trying to say is-"
I stopped him again.
"That you want to end things?"  I was hurt, hurt that he had me going and then boom! He's giving up.
I wanted us to work so bad! But I still didn't trust him... I expected him to win my trust... Not give up. He wanted to hurt me again, why did I even think for a second that he wanted us to work just as bad as I did?
I bit my lips so hard to stop myself from tearing up. But it was too late, they fell like rain drops down my cheeks.
"Shit." Elroy muttered. "Please stop crying." He said, taking a step closer. "Fay, listen... I'm not saying all this to hurt you-"
"Oh you're not?" I asked indignantly. "This is exactly why I can't trust you. You made me think that you wanted us to work. You said and did sweet things that made me think you cared about me... And then you just toss me aside, all over again. You should have just ended things after the brunch instead of leading me on... I'm tired of being played by you." I wiped my tears with my knuckles. "You wanna end things, fine... We're done... Over. But you better have a damn good reason to tell the press cause I'm not talking to anyone."
I turned away to the roadside, hoping another taxi would fly by... It was already so late.
No words were exchanged then.
Why was I so hurt by this? When did I start caring about him? He had been a jerk to me since we started dating. I should be glad, right? Then why do I feel like I had just broken up with someone I loved the most in this world? Or was it just the break up feeling?
He sighed. "Am I allowed to speak now?" He asked.
"Just go away." I muttered, refusing to face him.
"Fay," He pulled me by my waist, turning me to face him gently. And of course, I obliged. He held me in a romantic way and that is so not Elroy style. "I don't want to break up with you." He said as he raised his hands to wipe my tears. "I want us to start afresh." He said, making me seize from crying. "That's what I've been trying to tell you."
What?
"I'm not giving up... I just want to put an end to our emotionless relationship. I want us to start afresh Fay... We can learn to be together and trust each other. So... I wanna ask you again." He said. "Do you want to start afresh and be my girlfriend... For real this time."
I was short of words, I honestly didn't know what to say.
"You don't have to answer now... Take all the time you need. I'll wait for you to decide. Okay?"
Was he being serious? Or am I just night dreaming?
"Come on... It's pretty late. Let's go home." He smiled before looking around and pulling me towards his car.