DÉJÀ VU - Chapter 11: Chapter 11

"Ronaldo?" I called out, pacing the room, desperate for him to answer. My hands shook as I dialed his number again. This would be the last time. If he didn't pick up, I'd pack up the kids and leave. I needed to hold my eldest child. She needed me right now more than ever.
The thought that she had to go through something so....disgusting, to say the least is heart- wrenching and the thought of my baby being touched inappropriately, and worse without her consent, makes my heart sink straight to my ass.
I remember something similar happened to me, I've never forgotten, and I never will. To this day it still hurts, and I feel as though I can still feel the shots that caused my first miscarriage as if I just got shot.
First miscarriage.
No one should be able to say that.
And to think I was beginning to heal from my past, to focus on only my family, this happening to Xanai feels like I'm relapsing.
I'm so deep into my thoughts I didn't realize I was full on crying.
"Babes? Wah gwaan?" A voice startles me, pulling me out of my thoughts.
"Ronaldo. We affi talk, now. Where are you?" I ask sniffling, wiping as many of the tears as I possibly could.
"Why? Wahm? Mia come home now." He spoke, concern coating his tone.
About 20 minutes later I heard the door being unlocked.
I pull myself up to go downstairs to Ronaldo.
He hurried over to me, planting kisses on my tear-stained cheeks before engulfing me into a hug, making tears come to my eyes all over again.
Between sobs, I tried to speak. "Xanai... she... Xanai was molested, Ronaldo..." The words came out in a rush, almost unintelligible.
"Xanai what? Tek time, baby. What's wrong?" He furrowed his brows, confusion and worry written all over his face.
"She was molested."
His face changed. A darkness I hadn't seen before settled in his expression, his eyes burning with a quiet, dangerous fury. "Weh yuh seh?" he whispered, his voice low and cold.
"Ronaldo, I know you heard me," I replied, gathering myself. "I need to see my daughter now. Mi need fi go. Please, stay with the twins until we leave in two days."
"Aysia, weh yuh mean 'my daughter'? It's our daughter," he replied, pointing between us as he said 'our', his voice deep with conviction.
"A my daughter too, yuh know mi wi kill fi any a unu. Of Course mi wah see har too. Bloodclaat man!" His voice rose a little, but he softened again, looking at me with determination and pain mixed in his eyes.
Pulling me close, he whispered, "I know it's hard for you mama, cause unfortunately you went through it too, but its hard on me too ma, chu yuh nuh know how mi affi fold mi fist just now, and yuh know when mi ready mi get trigga happy. We aguh deal wid dis together. Mi nuh care wha it tek, mi nah mek nobody hurt we family again. Not one soul. Yer dat?"
I nodded silently, letting his words soothe me.
"Alright... we'll all go back to Jamaica together, okay? Mah book e jet." he said, looking at me, waiting for my answer.
I nodded again, knowing he meant it with every fiber of his being. This was our family, and we were going to face this pain together, no matter what it took.
Xanai Rylie Billings|18
After my second nap of the day, I let out a deep sigh, sitting up from my bed as my phone continued to ring, vibrating on the nightstand like it had a mind of its own. It felt like it had been going off for ages.
I glanced at the clock—4:16 pm. My stomach grumbled, reminding me I hadn't eaten since... well, since last week, really. I'd just been sleeping through the hunger.
Oh Goddd I'm hungry.
No shit Sherlock last time you ate was last week Thursday and now it's Wednesday.
I finally decided to get up and make myself something to eat. Nothing too complicated. I wasn't in the mood for anything that took too much effort.
I'd barely made it to the kitchen when I heard a knock on the door. I ignored it at first, hoping they'd go away, but then it got louder, more insistent. I rolled my eyes, sighing as I dragged myself over to the door, mentally preparing myself to brush off whoever it was.
But then I remembered Mom was to come today.
But when I opened the door, I froze. There stood my parents—and two of my younger siblings, the twins, standing right beside them. My mom's eyes were red and puffy, like she'd been crying. Dad's face looked tense, and his jaw was set in a hard line, though he softened a little when he saw me.
"Xanai..." Mom's voice was soft, shaky, like she was trying hard to hold herself together. She reached out and wrapped me in a hug before I could say anything, holding me so tight I could barely breathe.
"Are you guys okay?" I managed to ask, looking down at the twins, who stared back at me with wide, worried eyes. They were only four, and seeing them like that, anxious and clutching each other, made my heart ache.
Dad stepped forward, putting a hand on my shoulder, his voice low and steady, though I could feel an edge of anger simmering underneath. "I'm so sorry, princess."
"Yeah, Nai, we wanted to see you too," added my little sister, Xy'airah, her small hand clutching her twin brother Xaire's tightly. They looked up at me, their innocent faces filled with worry, sensing something was wrong even though they didn't fully understand.
"Are you okay, Xani?" Xaire asked softly, calling me by the nickname they both gave me as his big, innocent eyes searched my face.
I swallowed, nodding as best as I could, though the tears were already stinging my eyes. "I'll be okay, baby," I whispered, trying to keep my voice steady for their sake.
Hopefully.
Dad knelt down beside the twins, putting an arm around each of their shoulders. "Listen, guys," he said gently, "Xani's going through something really hard right now, but we're all going to help her through it. That's what family does. Right?"
"Right!" They chirped in unison.
Xy'airah let go of her brother's hand and stepped forward, wrapping her small arms around my waist. "We love you, Xani," she whispered, her face pressed into my side.
"I love you guys more." I say with a small smile.