Don't Stand By Me (COMPLETE) - Chapter 22: Chapter 22

KIARA
August 3rd: 14:23
I was on edge, insanely and irrevocably anxious in my own skin, and it wasn't even about Charles' progressing decomposition; though that fact didn't help ease my discomfort. What was really pushing my buttons was the fact that Cassie was avoiding me, which was a red flag in itself because being able to do that in a tiny RV filled to the brim with seven people. That alone meant you had to be actively avoiding someone. And I had no idea why. Anytime I went near her, she somehow disappeared, off into a random corner making conversation with anyone else; even Pearl, who was delighted with the company.
She was gone when I woke in the morning, which was my first surprise of the day. I thought we had finally gotten somewhere, shared a meaningful night together. But it wasn't meaningful to her, clearly. As she decided to ditch me before I woke and spend the day with Pearl.
From the moment I had woken up, Violet plastered against my back and snoring softly in my ear, I had noticed Pearl and Cassie were practically fused together. Whispering in the corner, making jokes and poking fun at each other. Pearl, while still handcuffed, appeared to be settling in nicely, seeming at ease with Cassie and Elvis at least. It left an unsettling feeling in my stomach, a heavy weight which I could only chalk up to jealousy. Which was juvenile and pathetic, I was well aware, but I couldn't help it.
I really liked this girl. Like really and somewhere along the way I had convinced myself that maybe she could maybe even feel the same way. The lingering touches, the holding hands, the soft smiles, it meant something to me. But clearly not to her, I noted bitterly, watching her jab Pearl in the side playfully. That's when it hit me, the reason Cassie had been acting differently; Pearl. From the moment the other girl had shown up, Cassie had become reserved around me, shying away from my touch and ignoring my glances. Because she was interested in someone else - that someone else being the absolutely gorgeous and rich blonde heiress who looked like she stepped out of a fashion magazine.
Our conversation from the previous night made even more sense as I watched them interact. She liked Pearl and she was making it blatantly obvious. Even though we had slept together, all she wanted was Pearl. At least I knew where I stood with her.
It was a horrible feeling - jealousy - and not one I had ever felt about a girl before. I didn't consider myself a jealous person but the sight of Pearl's hand on Cassie's arm made me want to rip it off. To avoid looking like a psychopath - and so we wouldn't be dragging a second corpse around - I moved to the front of the RV, slumping into the passenger seat, staring out of the windscreen.
"And who pissed in your cornflakes this morning?"
"Them." I muttered, signalling my head back towards the two girls who were giggling together.
"I think it's nice to see them both finally opening up." Violet noted, hands tight on the wheel, "They both seem to be properly relaxing."
"Whoopty doo." I rolled my eyes, arms folded.
"I can't tell if you're hungover or if corpse fever is getting to you."
"Corpse fever?"
"Corpse fever, murder madness. Whatever you want to call it. I'm not a therapist but this whole situation has got to be doing something negative to your brain. It's certainly doing something to mine."
"Oh you mean like banging an FBI agent?"
"I'm not banging- I am not even going to dignify that with a response." Violet turned her nose up but I could see a slight smile playing on her lips, "Speaking of banging-"
"None of that on my end either." I lied through my teeth, too hungover to listen to her shrieking if I told her the truth.
"Weird for you. Must be your longest dry spell since birth."
"Fuck off."
"I am loving the energy in this RV today! Somehow Brent's reception was warmer than yours."
"And how is that?" I asked, eager to propel the conversation towards someone else.
"I'm not letting you off that easily." She side-eyed me, then sighed, "But it's...fine? I guess. It's weird going from boyfriend and girlfriend to strangers in the span of a few hours. It's giving me whiplash if I'm being honest. But...I've seen him smile exactly twice since shit went down yesterday. And do you wanna know who he smiled at?"
"Me?" I fluttered my eyelashes at her teasingly.
"Please, if he had his way you'd be spooning dear old Charles by now."
"I feel like how casual we're becoming towards a literal rotting corpse in our trunk should be an issue."
"Eh," She shrugged, "Everyone reacts to trauma differently. I googled it. Anyway, the recipient of his wonderful smile is none other than our airheaded heiress herself."
"Pearl? Hardly." I was getting good at this lying thing.
"I'm serious. She's smitten with him and I for one think he is loving the attention."
"Would he even go for a girl like that?"
"I mean...look at me. She's basically me four years ago. Hell, even a year ago if I'm splitting hairs." She sighed, "Graduation looming forced some perspective into me, it really made me grow up. Maybe Brent didn't see that but -"
"The rest of us did." I placed a hand on her arm gently.
She smiled softly, shaking her head, "And that's all that matters."
"Do you think it could be a move? I mean he killed her boyfriend. If she falls in love with him...she'd protect him."
"I honestly don't know. If you had asked me yesterday I would have said 'no way', but now? I don't know a single thought going through his head and it's honestly terrifying. For all I know he could have cops waiting at the next stop saying that we kidnapped him."
"He's hardly that cruel."
"I'm more hoping that he's hardly that smart."
"What did we used to talk about before all this?"
"Who knows." Violet snorted, "Relationships? I feel like that's still all we talk about. And speaking of..."
"Fuck." I groaned, "You can find a segue out of thin air."
"I know, I'm a master conversationalist. Anyway...when are you going to make a move on miss gorgeous over there?"
"I don't know...never?" Definitely not after last night anyway.
"Don't act dumb."
"I'm not! She's barely even spoken to me since Pearl showed up. She clearly doesn't want that kind of relationship with me. Just friends is absolutely fine with me."
"Do you just permanently have your head up your own ass?"
"Excuse me?"
"That girl has had heart eyes for you from the moment you two met. She brings you to see the stars, Ki. That's the gayest thing I've ever heard."
"But she hasn't said-"
"Neither have you."
"But she's all over Pearl-"
"Because she's jealous, you idiot. Did you think that maybe she's with Pearl so you won't be?"
"That doesn't make any sense." I shook my head, unable to control the thoughts whirling in my head, "Why wouldn't she just talk to me, then?"
"Because she probably feels rejected. She's mad at you."
"Why would I want Pearl?"
"You flirt." Violet shrugged, "It's how you talk to people. It's one of your weaker qualities."
"I don't flirt! I'm just...charming."
"Don't make me gag. I'm hungover enough to puke all over you."
"I...alright fine. So what do I do?"
"Here's a bright idea!" She chuckled, "Talk about your feelings, maybe? Everything good starts with communication."
"I hate it when you're right."
"I'm always right, doll. Always."
I paused for a moment, gnawing on my lower lip, "It's weird though...right?"
"What is?"
"Having feelings for her. It feels like longer but we've known each other for a few days. A week ago I didn't even know someone like her existed."
"I mean, look at the people on Love Island." Violet tapped the steering wheel with her hand to an imaginary beat, "After a week basically clung together 24/7 they're in love."
"I'd like to think I'm a bit smarter than the people on Love Island."
"Don't be so judgemental, they have scientists on there. They're not dumb because they walk around half naked all day."
"True..." I hummed thoughtfully.
"Are you gonna pull her for a chat so? Or are you afraid she might mug you off?"
"Oh fuck off." I rolled my eyes as Violet burst out laughing, turning the wheel abruptly to avoid driving into a ditch.
—
"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me." I groaned, slapping the steering wheel.
The RV sputtered weakly in response. Muttering curses under my breath, I turned the wheel to the side as much as possible, slotting us off of the road and away from the oncoming traffic.
"Are we broken down?" Dixon appeared at my shoulder, glancing down at the dashboard as if it held all the answers.
"We're out of gas." I sighed, "We haven't passed a station since yesterday."
"Maps says there's one about five miles up the road." Dixon said, eyes trained on his phone, "I could take a walk up."
"I'll go with you." I suggested, unbuckling my seatbelt.
Thankfully everyone else was passed out, so no one could start freaking out that we were stranded on the side of the road. Elvis and Violet were curled around each other in the queen bed, while Brent and Pearl were sprawled across the couch, feet touching and both snoring quite loudly. Cassie was wrapped up in a blanket in the bottom bunk, unmoving for the last four hours at least. I hadn't even heard her speak since the night before.
"Where are you going?" Cassie yawned, sitting up as I was pulling my jacket across my chest, zipping it tightly. Her question was directed simply at Dixon.
"Gas station." Dixon explained, pulling a hat onto his head, "We're out of gas. Gonna walk up and see if we can find some." He turned towards the door, then instantly fell to his knees, groaning loudly, "Fuck!"
"Woah!" I exclaimed, crouching down beside him, "Are you okay?"
Cassie leapt from her bunk, scrambling over to his side, placing a hand on his back soothingly.
"My ankle..." He groaned, "it's twisted..."
"Really?" I frowned, "You barely moved-"
"I know what a twisted ankle is!" He snapped, then shook his head, "Sorry, I'm just in pain. I need to lie down."
"Of course!" Cassie hauled him upwards, helping him limp towards the bunkbed and tucking him in tightly.
"Guess it's just me." I sighed, moving towards the door.
"Don't be ridiculous!" Dixon exclaimed, "You can't go out this late alone. Cassie will go with you!"
That mother fucker. I glared at him as he sent me a discreet wink, before glancing at his sister with a pout on his lips. Cassie rolled her eyes and shrugged, which seemed yes enough for me. She pulled on her shoes and coat wordlessly, exiting the RV and holding the door open for me, one eyebrow raised expectantly. I glared at Dixon one last time as he beamed at me before following her out, letting the door fly shut behind me.
We walked in silence for the first mile, and I hated it, more than anything. But I didn't know what to say. What do you say to someone who was - whatever we were? She was walking at a brisk pace, jacket pulled tight around her and head held high, gazing up at the stars with a softened expression. I wracked my brain for something to say, something smart that would remind her how smart and awesome I was or something that would start a conversation, anything. I opened my mouth and all that came out was;
"I fucking hate mosquitos."
She snorted, shaking her head, "Really? That's what you came up with? I could hear the gears turning in your head."
"Shut up," I chuckled, "I panicked, okay."
"That's you, speak first, think second." A somewhat biting statement said in an oddly warm tone was leaving me lost.
"Hey, what constellation is that above us?" I pointed directly ahead at three stars connected in a line.
She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye and sighed, clearly debating something to herself silently. After a moment of tense silence that I assumed she'd never break, she pointed upwards.
"Orion's belt." She shrugged, "Kind of an obvious one."
"Only for a celestrian such as yourself."
"You flatter me." She snorted.
"I have very few memories of my parents." I began quietly, watching the sky above me in awe, "But one that always sticks with me is that we went camping."
"God, our parents loved to drag us camping." Cassie snorted, "I bet you loved it."
I sighed wistfully, "I did. I was like a mini girl scout. My dad set up our sleeping bags outside by the fire and told me to lie down and count as many stars as I could. I think it was his way of making me fall asleep, but it always stuck with me."
Cassie bumped my hip with hers gently as we walked, "It's nice you have those memories."
"Yeah...just as time goes on, I forget the little things. I forget the sound of my father's voice...my mother's perfume. If I'm being honest...their faces are blurry."
"I always worry that I'm going to forget how it feels to hug my mom. It's difficult, losing those memories but...they're always going to be a part of you, even if you forget the little things. You'll always be their daughter."
"I never thought of it like that before." I glanced over to see her looking away quickly, "Thank you."
"They'd be really proud of the woman you've become."
I resisted the urge to throw myself into my arms and burst into tears. Instead I gave her a gentle smile, "Thank you. I know your mom would feel the same...about you."
"Thank you."
To relieve some of the depressing tension that had filled the air, I decided to change the subject to something lighter. For the rest of our journey I kept badgering her with star questions; what constellation is that? Are there any named stars? Anything and everything that would get her to keep speaking without biting my head off. It worked, for almost two hours until we finally reached a small town, completely darkened save for a few streetlamps littering the streets.
"Wanna stay here for the night?" I suggested, "And get gas in the morning? I really don't wanna walk back this late."
She yawned lightly and nodded, "Good idea."
We wandered through the fairly empty streets, before stumbling across a BnB that looked like it fell out of the pages of a story book. We both silently agreed and wandered inside, hoping that someone would even be awake at nearly midnight. The interior is exactly what I expected, bright and homey, with books littering the various shelves throughout. I was honestly surprised that the place didn't smell like freshly baked cookies.
"I only brought fifty for gas," Cassie groaned, "Do you have anything?"
I fish around in my backpack and sigh, "Only fifty."
"Let's hope it can get us some sort of room." She frowned, "I'd rather not sleep on the streets."
"Hello, my dears!" An elderly woman appeared from nowhere, barely taller than the desk she stood behind, "What can I do for you at this hour?"
"Do you have any rooms available?"
She smiled warmly, flipping through a small book and nodding, "We have a few. What kind are you looking for?"
"Anything in the fifty price range?"
She frowns, "We have one, but it's usually for one person."
"We'll take it." I slapped the money down on the counter, "Our camper broke down and we don't want to walk back to it this late."
"Oh, you poor babies!" She cooed, "Well, the room is yours, I'll pass up some extra blankets to make a bed on the floor."
"We appreciate it, thank you very much." I grinned at her, ignoring how stiff Cassie was by my side.
The room wasn't that bad considering how cheap it was. While small and cramped for sure, with a single bed pressed against the wall, a tv that looked like it was from the nineties and a small wardrobe. The old woman - Ethel - bustled into the room ahead of us, dropping three large duvets on the ground and fashioning them into a comfy looking bed. With two pillows to go with it, it nearly looked nicer than the actual bed. We thanked Ethel and she beamed, patting our shoulders and wishing us goodnight, closing the door gently behind her.
Cassie, still decidedly mute, moved towards the window and glanced out at the midnight sky, hands gripping the ledge tightly, her knuckles white.
"Do you need to talk about something?" I began carefully, not eager to set her off in whatever weird mood she found herself in the last twenty four hours.
"Nope." She didn't even turn to face me, content to stare out the window.
"Are you sure?"
"Yep." She popped the 'p'.
"Yep?"
"Yep."
"You did not just yep at me."
"Oh, but I did." She snorted, gripping the ledge even tighter.
"What is your problem?" I snapped, causing her to whirl around and face me, eyes blazing, "You haven't shown a shred of animosity towards me since we met and all of a sudden I'm your worst enemy. I thought we were close."
"We were- we are!" She exclaimed, throwing a hand into her hair, "Can't I have an off day? We're transporting a dead body, for Christ's sake."
"Nope. None of that. Don't use the corpse excuse."
"It's not an excuse! We could go to jail-"
"Cassie."
Her shoulders slumped in defeat, "Look, we're fine, I don't want to talk about it."
I stepped closer to her, "Maybe you should."
"Basta." She said warningly, her gaze steely as it locked with mine. Something I couldn't decipher flashed in her eyes and I ached to be closer to her.
She moved back to create distance between us but found herself stuck as her back pressed against the wall. I didn't move any closer, not wanting to suffocate her, keeping a few inches between us as I watched her thoughtfully.
"You have a problem with me." I sighed, "And I just want to know what it is so I can fix it. You're my friend, Cassie. If anything I should be the one who's mad!"
"What?"
"You left, Cassie. We spent what I thought was a great night together and I woke up in the morning cuddled up to Violet of all people. Then you ignore me all day for Pearl?"
"I didn't...I don't..."
"I get that you have feelings for Pearl, but-"
"I don't have feelings for Pearl."
I frowned, "Then what's wrong, Cassie?"
"You! You're what's wrong!" She snapped, her pent up anger releasing for the first time since I had known her, poking her finger into my chest to emphasise her words, "You're just...everywhere! You're so confusing and gorgeous and infuriating and cazzo I've been so fucking obvious but you ignore me at every point! But the second Pearl walks in, it's all good girl and princess and being all over her!"
"Cass-"
I stared at her dumbfounded as she began to yell in Italian, too quickly for my brain to translate. I prided myself on my fluency but my mind was whirling as I realised this was the first time she was speaking to me in native tongue.
"And I'm left here like an idiot because I have fucking feelings for you and you don't even care! You don't even like me and that's fine, but god I just feel fucking stupid!" Her eyes brimmed with tears, cheeks bright red with exertion, "I left this morning because I was mortified. That you wanted Pearl but she's all over Brent so you settled for me."
"Are you done?" I asked softly, stepping slightly closer.
"Am I done? Well, I guess I am. Hey, you were right. I do feel a lot better. Let's go to bed-"
I couldn't even let her finish her sentence. I moved in closer and finally covered her lips with mine. She let out a squeak of surprise, hand slapping against the wall as she searched for something to grip. It then travelled upward, into my hair and pulled me closer as I kissed her, probably rougher than I should have. My body moved on instinct, covering hers completely and pressing her against the wall. She broke our lips apart with a ragged gasp, holding me tightly as I moved to her neck, nosing lightly and leaving soft kisses in my wake.
"W-what are you doing?" She breathed, head tilted back against the wall.
I chuckled, "Kissing you?" I pecked her collarbone to prove my point.
"But why?"
"Cassie." I groaned, moving my head back and standing so we were face to face. I cupped her chin lightly, "You said I've missed all the signals...what about you?"
"What about me?" Her chest heaved as she watched me, eyes shining in that way I had come to cherish.
"I've been all over you since the moment we met, Cass."
"But you...you flirt with everyone. Pearl..."
"I flirt with everyone." I sighed, "Because it means nothing. You mean something."
"Oh."
"Mhm." I smiled softly, watching her brain try to catch up with her.
"So you like me?" She asked, eyes wide and hands on my hips.
"Quite a lot, actually." I grinned, placing a kiss on her nose, "Are you gonna leave me hanging, here?"
"Of course not!" She gasped, moving her hands to my face, cupping my cheeks and pulling me in gently.
I exhaled softly as our lips met again, moving together in tandem. Something about kissing her just felt...right. After days of build up and anxiety, it all melted away as she held me close, kissing me as if I was precious.
"God, Tesoro." She murmured as we broke apart, resting her forehead against mine and smiling, "Finally."
I flushed at the sign of endearment, feeling the warmth fill me.
"Thank God. I am so sick of Violet spooning me to sleep-" I broke off into a laugh as she pushed me backwards, swatting my chest lightly.
"So you thought I liked Pearl?" I smirked, "As if."
"Hey, you thought I liked Pearl."
"We need to work on being more obvious."
"I don't know...everyone else seemed to pick up on it except us."
"Lesbian blinders." I nodded, "Of course."
I couldn't help but stare at her for a moment, her lips curled up into a smile, her hand slotted into mine perfectly. Her eyes shone as she looked at me in a way I never had seen from anyone else before; the same way she had been looking at me all week. And it hit me like a ton of bricks.
I was in love...Love Island style.
The thought wouldn't leave my brain as she slowly moved me backwards until my thighs hit the bed. She smirked, climbing onto my lap, pushing me back and kissing me. I melted into her touch as I leaned back, sprawled across the pillows, smiling into each kiss.
I had always been taught that love was a fleeting thing, something not necessary to be happy. But now, with Cassie in my arms all I could think was that maybe being in love wasn't so bad. And maybe, for the first time in my life...someone would love me back.