Forgotten Conscience - Chapter 40: Chapter 40

Someone's POV
Kill... Kill the slayer... Gotta kill the slayer... Have to kill the slayer... Have to... Someone's coming. It's someone big, someone REALLY big. This is gonna be fun.
I grab his arm as it comes overhead.
"By the sound of those massive mud flaps I'd peg you as a demon, which means you're in for a world of..."
I open my eyes and look up at whatever stupid demon...
Oh crap...
"... Pain..."
Adam, get up before he butchers you.
"Spike, I want you to come with me."
Oh yeah that's a good idea.
"Do you? Well let's go then."
I turn around long enough to pull a fist back. I punch him in the stomach.
"Ow!"
Okay I don't fancy trying that again.
"Come..."
He takes a step forward and I take a couple back.
"You're going to help me with my problem."
Right and that's gonna happen.
"And why's that exactly?"
"I'm going to help you with yours."
My problem? What problem do I have that he can...? Oh, I knew this was gonna be fun.
Buffy's POV
She's been real quiet.
I unlock the door to my dorm room and we walk in.
I don't think she's said a word since we left Giles'. Even when we went patrolling for the complete lack of vampires we found. It's probably a bad thing that we didn't find any vamps but oddly enough I'm more concerned about Faith.
I close the door behind Faith as she walks into the middle of the room.
She's just standing in the middle of the room, it's almost like she's uncomfortable around me. Oh god, I'm not making her uncomfortable cause I have feelings for her am I? I mean I know I've sorta been half staring at her since we left Giles', but that wasn't because I think she's hot. I mean I do think she's hot but then how does she know that unless I tell her... God...
I resist the urge to slap myself in the face that would probably bring up too many more questions than I'm willing to answer.
I can't keep doing this to myself. Just cause I have this uncontrollable urge to suck on her bottom lip doesn't mean I should just blurt out how I feel about her, especially with her condition. What am I talking about? Her condition? It's not like she's diseased and gangrene or something, she's got amnesia. It's not contagious. She's still standing there, still uncomfortable, shifting her weight but never actually moving. Something's wrong, I should ask her what's wrong.
"Faith?"
She turns and looks at me with those big brown eyes of hers.
"Yeah?"
"Is everything okay?"
She starts pacing slowly and rubbing the back of her head.
"Um... yeah... um..."
Why don't I believe her?
I take a few steps toward her.
"Are you sure?"
She rubs a hand down her chest.
STOP staring at her chest!
"Well there is one thing..."
Don't even think it. That's not going to help anything.
"What's that?"
You know you're thinking about it but you just have to stop.
"I'm feeling kinda dirty."
I'm sorry what? Did she say she felt dirty?
"I'm sorry what?"
Get your mind out of the gutter Buffy, she's not talking about that kind of dirty.
"I've been wearing these same clothes for at least a few days now and I've been sweating and rolling around in the dirt and everything. Would you mind if I took a shower if you have one? And maybe I could borrow something to sleep in?"
Yeah I'm sure I could find SOMETHING for her to sleep in... stop it Buffy, you're trying NOT to think that way remember?
"Buffy?"
"Hmm? Oh, yeah..."
I walk over to my dresser, pick out some clothes. I walk back across the room and hand them to her.
"Here, these should fit well enough."
"Thanks..."
She smiles at me and I feel all tingly down south.
"N-No problem, the shower's over in the bathroom, there should be soap and shampoo in there for you."
She turns and starts walking to the bathroom.
"I appreciate it."
Her ass sways as she goes in.
STOP looking at her ass.
I lie down on my bed.
Oh man, I think I really got it bad for her.
I hear the door creak slowly to a close.
I wonder what this all means about me. I mean, am I some kind of lesbian? Am I gonna start checking out chicks at The Bronze or something? I was kind of checking Faith out a second ago. Okay maybe kinda is the wrong word. I was totally checking her out a second ago. I couldn't really stop myself at the meeting either. But is it just Faith that I have feelings for? Cause that would be different than being a lesbian... course I'm not sure what that difference is but I'm pretty sure there is one... I think. I know the way I feel about Faith is different than the way I felt about Angel, and it's definitely different than the way I feel about Riley. In fact, I'm not sure how I feel about Riley anymore.
I hear Faith walking around in the bathroom.
Did the door actually close? I don't think I heard it close.
I sit up on my bed and look to the bathroom door.
She didn't close the door all the way. There's just enough room that I can see Faith as she walks over and stands, back to the door, in front of the crack in the door. Stop tempting yourself Buffy, you're just gonna end up kicking yourself, or more likely screwing yourself later on.
I know I should look away as she pulls her shirt over her head and throws it away, revealing her nearly blemish free skin. I get all flushed as I run my hand down my chest.
I bet she's got really smooth skin.
I take a deep breath as the warm tingly sensation in my nether regions makes me rub my thighs together. My head gets lighter and my blood runs south as I see her turn and pull her pants down to her ankles. She steps out of view as she steps out of her pants. I lie down on the bed again as I hear the shower turn on.
God, now I know I got it bad for this girl. I've gone so low I've actually resorted to becoming a peeping Tom, or should I say a peeping Tanya? I'm never gonna get to sleep tonight.
I hear the steady stream of water interrupted and I know she's gotten in. My head is filled with thoughts and feelings of water trickling down her body. Down her chest, over what I can only assume are her firm yet supple young breasts.
I think I can almost feel her washing herself with my soap.
I take a deep breath, closing my eyes as I run my fingers through my hair.
I need to stop doing this. She's not interested, and even if she was eventually she'll get her memory back and I know the other Faith isn't interested and probably never will be. Get some and get gone, that's always been her motto. Even if she could be interested in me she'd only be interested in me long enough to get what she wants from me and I don't think I could deal if that's all she wanted from me. Whoa!
I sit up and open my eyes.
Maybe it's the lack of blood in my brain, but did I just realize I want more than just sex out of her?
I pull my hair back out of my face.
Oh god, I just made this whole situation worse didn't I? I should really figure out where I stand with Faith, before I do something that'll make everything worse.
The shower water stops running.
I can't go back to Riley and find out. We're on thin ice as it is. I should, I should find someone neutral, someone who I don't care about so I can figure out how I really feel, whether this is about women in general or just about Faith. But where would I even find someone like that?
The bathroom door opens.
Speak of the devil.
I stand up and turn to face her.
I suddenly regret giving her those clothes.
The sweat pants hang off her showing nothing off, but the muscle shirt I gave her looks like it's at least 2 sizes too small.
Then again she does have a better rack than me... a better rack than me? God I'm starting to sound like a guy. STOP LOOKING at her chest.
I look up at her face and I still see a look of uncomfortable silence on her face.
Something's still wrong.
"Do you feel better?"
She takes a deep breath and for a second and I'm worried that she's gonna burst out of her shirt.
"Yeah, I think so."
The look on her face says different.
"Are you sure?"
She takes a second.
"Yeah... I'm fine."
You know it's late, I'm tired, I'm not gonna push her into a conversation that might get me killed.
"All right well we should probably get some sleep. We've got work to do tomorrow."
"Yeah, I am kinda tired."
I walk around to one side of my bed while Faith walks over to her bed on the floor, between the twin beds. She lies down as I climb into bed and pull the covers over me.
"Goodnight, Faith."
"Um... Goodnight Buffy."
I lie there wide awake.
There's no way I'm gonna sleep tonight.