From Ashes ✗ Stiles Stilinski - Chapter 43: Chapter 43

The music pulsed and thrummed against the walls of the warehouse and it was so muggy that even the exposed drywall looked like it was sweating. The thick air smelled strongly of alcohol and weed and men's cologne, causing Maddie to grimace whenever she inhaled through her nose. There were far too many people crammed into the old building that everyone moved almost as one to avoid pressing up any tighter together. Not that they would've minded, Maddie assumed. If nothing else, every person around her seemed to thrive off of full-body contact. Girls were in thin crop tops or bikini tops and shorts that were made of fabrics that were every color of the rainbow (there was even a girl with rainbow shorts). The men were generally more clothed in their jeans and ribbed tank tops. Then again, there were several people simply not wearing shirts at all and Maddie remembered blushing furiously the first few times she saw this.
This was not how Maddie imagined celebrating her fifteenth birthday at all. She wanted a night of old sitcoms, a few rounds of Super Smash Bros, and maybe a patrol if she really needed to blow off some steam. She never in her short life thought that she would end up at one of those crazy warehouse parties that roam every week to a new location. She never thought she would be standing against a wall in her brand new Doc Marten boots (a gift from Faith earlier that day), a pair of ripped shorts, and a loose black band tee with the sleeves ripped off that read METALLICA: RIDE THE LIGHTNING (complements of Terra, the only one of them who listened to Metallica). She never thought that she'd be wearing thick black makeup that curtained her eyelids or that the kinks in her hair would be ironed into massive, teased waves. She never thought that she'd feel so unapologetically badass.
Still, she felt...off, like she was in a full body costume or armor and couldn't tell yet if she was at a masquerade or a gladiator arena. Like she was so much smaller than this world she walked into only an hour ago. She didn't care for the techno music pounding through her bones. She didn't know anyone but the rest of her team and they'd gone in different directions mere minutes after the five walked through the door. The large tan man at the door hadn't even asked for ID. He just let them in. It kind of annoyed her - partially because it meant just anyone could get in and partially because it meant she'd have to stay.
Maddie was flat against a wall, leaning so hard that she was half hoping the wall would absorb her or, more realistically, crack so that she could sneak out. Marie tried once already to pull her to the center of the room, a large smile practically splitting her face in two as she shouted, "Dance with me!"
Maddie shook her head and let go of her hand and Marie didn't seem to notice as a man with no shirt and long hair the color of mud whispered something in her ear and she was led away. Now, she was currently dancing between him and a girl with white-blonde hair and no shoes (and, again, no shirt for that matter). They moved like three snakes writhing side by side, hair and skin (lots of skin) drenched in sweat.
At least she's having fun.
Somewhere in the room, she knew that Charlie was dancing alone, spinning in the heat of the lights and bodies, and enjoying her strange solitude. Charlie wasn't here for grinding up against boys or girls and everyone already seemed to know that and kept a measured distance. They watched as she moved effortlessly on the floor and sang along to the lyrics. Always the best dancer, always the best singer. She told them once a long time ago that she wanted to be a dancer before she was taken from La Palma, California when she was nine. It wasn't until she blasted a K-Pop group called Jewelry and sang along to their songs every morning that they began to understand. If anyone was bitter about their fate - becoming a Slayer, living in altruistic silence - it was her.
Charlotte Jheon was too kind and too talented for the life she was handed. She deserved better than a makeshift warehouse dance floor but she sang and danced within the confines of these four walls, crowded with strangers all the same. Something had to be better than nothing.
Maddie scanned the room for the two older girls, Teresa and Emery. She wouldn't at all be surprised if Terra and Em were in some corner of the room making out, to be honest. They were the last ones to check up on her and, even then, they were pawing at each other, swaying to their own beat. That was how they lived though, to their own beat. The cheerleader and the punk, the best and brightest, both so unapproachable and untouchable like they lived on an entirely different plane of existence. Once Maddie had confirmed that she was fine, Em led Terra away as Terra gripped Em's exposed waist. Maddie had never been so envious of two people, of the way Terra smiled when Em would hold her hand and nuzzle the crook of her neck. They were an enormous ball of light, illuminating anything they touched. It reminded Maddie of her parents in some vaguely familiar way.
She found herself scanning the room filled with warm and low orange light and glistening, moving bodies. At least Terra and Em would be a comfort to have around. Instead, she found nothing. It was too packed and there wasn't near enough light to identify anyone she knew. Faces were nothing but shadows and blurs.
Maybe that's why he bumped into her. Maybe it was just an accident. Maybe, on the other hand, he meant it. She'd never find out either way.
She felt one of the many bodies collide with her side, but it hardly jostled her. It did, however, gain her attention as they paused in front of her. When she turned and looked up, she saw only the tall, sinewy outline until a violet spotlight glided past them, revealing a boy with a strong jawline, mussed black hair, and bright eyes that she couldn't identify the color of in the orange haze. What she did see was shock in them, which faded lazily into an inscrutable, half lidded gaze as his lips stretched into a Cheshire cat grin. He looked young, at least young enough to attend one of the local high schools but there was really no telling if that was true.
He was...pretty. Ridiculously pretty. She wanted to think 'handsome' but the word 'pretty' was just too perfect.
Maddie, who was studying the boy's face, shifted her gaze away, feeling as though the heat of the warehouse sank into her skin and rose in her chest. She folded her arms over her chest and kept her gaze on the ground. So what if he was attractive and had really nice arms? Who cared? Not her. Not even a little. He walked over to the small space of wall right beside her and leaned, crossing his arms. She eyed him from her periphery and noted that his gaze was on the crowd.
"God damn, they're like animals," he said and his voice was deep and gravelly with a note of admiration. Immediately, it felt like her ears had tuned into him, like the music that was almost deafening had lowered a few notches.
There was a long pause. Did he expect a reply? She swallowed. "They're having fun."
"They're high!" he said with a laugh and the admiration was gone. "You'd be surprised how low your standards for entertainment are when you're snorting your dad's oxy from some dude's abs or making special friends with Ecstasy."
"The drug?"
"No, Ecstasy the person. But she lets you sample some high quality X before..."
Maddie sent him an odd glance. "Before what?"
He laughed again and it was its own melody. "You're way too young to be here."
"You don't know that," she replied instantly, a bite in her tone at the accusation even if he was right and she kind of agreed. "You don't know me."
"I know girls like you. So, let me save you the after school special."
This time her head whipped in his direction, eyes narrowed on him and Terra's words straightening her back. "Or you could leave before you hurt yourself."
"Is that a threat?"
She gave a tight smile. "I don't make threats."
Both of his eyebrows raised and he unfolded his arms, holding his hands up half way in surrender.
"Yikes. Sorry. Just...don't beat me up okay?" He said it with another laugh, like her demeanor was a joke, and a jolt of annoyance shot through Maddie. "It's just a friendly warning. These parties never end well."
"Then why are you here?"
He dropped his hands and stuffed them in the pockets of his jeans.
"To meet interesting people." With a boldness that baffled Maddie, he nudged her arm with his and the small contact of skin on skin felt electric. "For instance."
She shook off the heady rush and rolled her eyes so hard it hurt a little. "Right, sure."
"Okay," he started and she could hear the smile in his voice. "What about cute and a little bit scary?"
Maddie was suddenly thankful for the orange light washing out all of the other colors in the room, including her beet red cheeks. It wasn't like it was everyday that someone complimented her on anything, especially someone who wasn't Marie.
She stayed silent for most of the night after that, watching the masses being absorbed into a different world. The boy beside her would point to people and tell story after story of warehouse parties, each one more outlandish than the last. He told pretentious jokes that Maddie didn't understand but the way he spoke the words, like they were chosen carefully and just for her, made her grin.
As the music died and the people cleared out and Maddie's face hurt from smiling so much, he finally gave her his name. Elliott.
He asked if she wanted to know where the next party would be. In retrospect, she wished she hadn't said yes. She wished she'd seen Marie watching them. She wished she never even learned his name.
Maybe then, she wouldn't look back on that night as the night she made every wrong choice.
Maybe, just maybe, Elliott and Marie would've survived the following spring.
☽ † ☾
She didn't fall.
It was a couple of seconds. A blip. A nothing. A moment of nothing.
A moment.
A mistake.
Maddie remembered the panic she felt when her foot slipped, the feeling of falling as her hand lost grip on the cool metal of the blue jeep. She thought she would just fall down, land on the pavement, and receive two very concerned expressions. Instead, she stumbled backwards and hit something. Hands gripped her upper arms on either side, steadying her so that she wouldn't fall over. And she didn't. She definitely didn't fall.
Her entire body had stiffened, still in pain from earlier. Still covered in bruises and hiding cracked ribs beneath purple skin. She leaned against him, limbs still and muscles tense, remembering how hard her back had hit the concrete wall of the Argents' basement and especially remembering the sharp knee to her spine delivered by Allison. Leaning against Stiles, even for a moment, made it difficult to not relax. He was pleasantly warm, which she expected, but she didn't expect the number it would do on her the second time around. She didn't expect her heartbeat to hiccup the moment he caught her, or for it to continue on faster after that. Naturally, she twisted out of his grasp.
It was the dream that did this, that made her think, even for a second, that Stiles was anything more than just that - Stiles. It twisted her view on him. Every moment she even started a thought considering otherwise felt like insanity. She remembered that feeling; she recalled being so infatuated that it felt like she lost her mind. In the same moment, she remembered that Marie really did lose it.
That's what feelings did, though. They drove people insane.
Three hundred and fifty-eight days ago, there was nothing but insanity. Nothing but pain and death, the smell of blood and rot. Nothing but heavy sheets of rain soaking her to the bone and leaving her skin icy to the touch. She traced the scar on her stomach through her shirt, willing herself not to forget. Willing herself to play the lone soldier and willing away the hollow feeling when she thought of how she shrugged off Stiles' grip on her.
It wasn't hollowness. She understood what it was like to feel hollow, cavernous even. This was guilt.
Nothing good came from developing romantic intentions towards a slayer. It ended the same way every time. She wouldn't wish her life on anyone, especially not a friend. Because that's what he is. It wasn't a bad thing; it was more than she could've hoped for at a time when she didn't really hope for anything. She appreciated her friendship with him more than she could possibly express. Some days, it felt more real than anything else she had. That was all there needed to be.
She wasn't going to pretend that he hadn't taken several long looks at her through the rearview mirror or that his fingers were drumming on the steering wheel louder than usual. And she sure as hell wasn't going to act like it wasn't an awkward and completely silent ride all the way to the rave.
Once they exited the car, the three huddled by the warehouse and Scott began explaining the plan. The syringe would incapacitate Jackson, the mountain ash would trap him (Stiles was in charge of that), and they'd be actively working with Derek's pack to pull all of this off.
Maddie grimaced at Scott and he gave her a pleading look. She didn't say anything in return. Honestly, the last thing she could stand at the moment was another argument. She felt like she was worn down too much in the past twelve hours, like someone took a sandblaster to her brain and all that was left was dust.
In that instant, Scott sniffed the air, something catching his attention. His calm dissolved to panic and the ground felt almost like it was wavering under Maddie's feet. "What?"
He wasn't paying attention anymore. "No! Not now!"
Maddie looked over at Stiles, who was gaping at where Scott stood only moments before. His eyes shot over at hers, mirroring her current state which was equivalent to being pushed off a cliff and waiting for the feeling of free falling.
That was when she heard a rumbling. A car engine. Suddenly Stiles' face was illuminated with a harsh white light and she turned to the source. An old car stopped a few yards away, engine rumbling like a low growl as it idled. One of the back passenger doors swung open and a flash of blonde hair swept across her view. Something hardened in her gut and she turned to Stiles with a deep frown before jogging over to the car.
Once Maddie passed the headlights, Buffy came into better view and so did the worry on her face as she nodded for them to step further away. Maddie begrudgingly obliged, folding her arms as if they could shield her from whatever Buffy would say. Once they stopped, Buffy turned back to her. "Maddie-"
"What the hell are you doing here?" Maddie didn't know why she burst out like that, like even Buffy saying her name was enough to send a jolt of anger through her. Her jaw clenched as Buffy's mouth hung open. "I can't do this right now."
"Now's really all we've got. Listen, something's wrong..." Buffy swallowed and looked down for a moment and then back up at Maddie. "With you. Your powers, I mean."
Maddie felt a stabbing pain in her chest, first because she'd just been told there was something wrong with her and second because she already knew there was something wrong with her slayer powers. If anything, she felt it during her fight with Allison. She felt like she'd been moving in slow motion and her bones were dried up twigs. It still hurt to breathe too deeply but it was getting better...just not as quickly as it used to.
She suddenly remembered how quick and how spry Allison was and the anger she tried to keep at bay spider webbed through her chest and lodged in her throat. She looked up at the older blonde. Buffy still couldn't look her in the eye when she spoke again. "I don't know what sort of Freaky Friday mojo happened here but we need to get to the bottom of it. We need to go back to headquarters. All of us."
Her stomach and all the emotions of the past few hours bottomed out and just for a moment, Maddie felt numb. She wasn't even in her body, like she was watching the moment pass between two strangers from afar. The white noise in her head cleared in the next moment and she was slammed back into reality with such force that it almost hurt. A seething rage filled her up so much that her eyes felt like they were floating in it. "No."
Now, Buffy's eyes landed on Maddie, confusion on her tired face. "What?"
"No." Maddie never disagreed with Buffy out loud no matter how much she wanted to, not ever. As hurt and as angry as she was the past few years, she never had the guts. Buffy was the only person she'd never been outright belligerent with and she couldn't help but think that may have been the reason she was so terrible toward everyone else. Maybe that was her anger talking but today had was too much and this moment felt all wrong. She couldn't leave. She couldn't. She pushed her chin out and looked at the woman with a hard, black stare. "I'm not leaving. And I'm not doing this right now."
"Not doing what?" Buffy's tone was turning sour and Maddie couldn't help but feel justified.
"This. Talking to you," she said, squaring her shoulders. "I'm not going to talk to you and I'm not leaving."
"This is important. Life or death!"
Maddie unfolded her own arms and gestured to the warehouse that was already pulsating with heavy bass. "So is this! You of all people should get that! Just, I don't know! Go back to the Argents' house or something. I'm busy right now."
"Hey! Commanding officer here! Hello!" Buffy waved a hand in front of Maddie's face and rage flared in her chest again. She hated when Buffy would do this, pull rank. Take away the mask of awkward and forced sympathy. "I'm not going to just go away."
Liar. Going away was all she ever did. Maddie thought back to the first time she left without a word, when she was eleven and terrified. She asked Xander where Buffy went and for years he gave her the same answer.
"It's complicated." It was always complicated.
"She wishes she could be here." No, she didn't.
Maddie always swallowed the words down and let them sit in her stomach, even as they sharpened into a blade and shredded her insides. By the time Xander said it the day Maddie was leaving for Beacon Hills, it felt as though there was nothing left inside to slash or cut. It didn't hurt because there was nothing left to hurt.
It hurt now. It hurt because, in one sentence, Buffy ignored the one thing Maddie might've forgiven her for, the thing that shaped her. Whatever was caged in her chest broke through its iron bars like they were made of straw and she couldn't stop what left her mouth. "Why not? It's what you're good at."
Buffy let out a breath like it was taken from her by force. "...Excuse me?"
Maddie knew this - so much rage, it might've been freedom. It was what she unleashed when she stared into her bully's bloodied face. A scale tipped in her favor.
"I've been doing fine here for months without you. Probably longer." That part felt unbelievably good to say. It was the most power she had in days. "This is my fight and I'll handle it. That's what you wanted, right?"
"It's not just yours anymore." Buffy was still recovering as she did the one thing she hadn't done in years: she looked at Maddie, not through, and Maddie could see the difference. The revelation of it. She could see her and her words didn't match the look on her face. "This is a lot bigger than you."
"But nothing's bigger than you," Maddie bit back. A flood gate of terrible thoughts had been torn off of its hinges and spilled out of her mouth in vicious waves. "Not that you know anything about the Argents. They've gone to war over less."
The Argents. Did Buffy know anything about the Argents? Did she know about Kate or Gerard? Did she have any idea what she'd thrown Maddie into?
Something like a laugh left Maddie's lips, but anyone at a distance might've thought it was a sob. "You'd have to know more than what you can write on the back of a photo in five minutes."
Buffy gaped for a moment, eyebrows furrowed so deeply that they almost met in the center. "What the hell is this? What, some teen rebellion thing? Some pent up aggression for what happened to Marie-"
"Don't-" It almost came out as a scream and she prayed that Scott and Stiles wouldn't run over and witness what was happening. No one said that name to her since...when? The day of the funeral? She hadn't heard Buffy say it even before the night in the alley, or maybe for years before that. The power of it opened up the earth beneath her, hooked her by her feet, and dragged her down. "You don't get to say that name! You didn't even know her, so don't act like you tried."
Buffy looked away again, down at the blacktop and then back to Maddie. "You don't understand..."
"I don't understand?" Another strangled laugh broke free from her throat. "You don't get it. You did this. You made us into this and when we needed you the most..."
When I needed you most.
She swallowed the words and started again. "You think I've hated you since you buried my best friend but you turned your back on us way before that."
"I'm sorry, okay?" The last word may have sounded like a plea but there was an edge growing in Buffy's voice, like Maddie had dug something up that she was never supposed to find. "I'm sorry I couldn't be there for every bad thing that happened. I'm sorry that the world didn't stop when she died."
It wasn't the apology Maddie hoped she would hear one day; it was defensive and almost spiteful. There was the death of something in Buffy's voice.
"But that's the life of a slayer. That's what happens. People you love will die and you live and you keep living without them. I hate the way you had to learn that but in the most important moments, all you have is you and I can't spare you from that. The world keeps spinning and we have to keep going-"
"Stop it!" Maddie was shouting again and it was the sound of a child, but children had innocence and she hadn't felt like a child in a very long time. She felt old, too old to be sixteen. Buffy's tone and her words were insulting. "Don't act like everything you did was some life lesson. This is on you."
Maddie jabbed an accusatory finger at the woman to make her point - or maybe to make a bridge for her own shame to cross. Buffy flinched as if it was a knife.
"You knew what would happen if you activated all the slayers. You had to know...because it was done to you. Thousands of girls who have nothing, who just fight and fight until there's nothing left inside and the only other thing we can ever be is dead!" Maddie's words were coming out hoarse and gravelly from shouting - and maybe from something else. Something that had been buried in her anger. "That's when you show up, just in time to bury a body. Then you leave, again. So, Buffy, do what you're best at."
"I leave...because I have to. I need to be your teacher. I can't... The best lesson I can give is let you find your own way. That's the lesson. It sucks, believe me. I know better than anyone, but it's what we have to do." There was a strangeness in her voice, like pushing the words out hurt, and her eyes were wide and pleading.
Maddie could still feel the power behind her anger and how clear it made the world around her. She couldn't stop until Buffy knew. Until she understood. "You didn't teach us to find our own way, you taught us to suffer in silence! To distance ourselves from anything that makes us feel..."
She trailed off for a second and her face crumpled. Normal. She thought of Allison first. She thought of the day in the gym, accused of distancing herself from everyone because she couldn't accept help and it felt true.
Stiles came to mind and something twisted in her stomach. She spent most of the time she knew him telling him to shut up when all he probably wanted was to understand. Why the hell did he have to care so much when she didn't know how to care for someone else without hurting them? She didn't know how to be a real friend. She didn't even know if Marie was ever actually her friend.
Her anger crashed into a wall and she was exhausted. When she looked Buffy in the eye - in those withdrawn, green eyes - she felt something, at the bottom of Pandora's Box, where foolish hope curdled and became disappointment.
"From anything that makes us feel human. Maybe that's fine for you but I don't want to be Buffy Summers." Something in her chest was slowly dying and she was sure it was the child who saw the woman in front of her as her hero. She wasn't crying to go home anymore. Home didn't exist. She pushed the last of her spite into her voice. "I don't want to be a coward."
The word left Maddie's mouth so easily that she didn't feel like she had crossed a line until she felt the stiff backhand across her cheekbone.
She stumbled to the ground, gravel digging into her palms and something black and cold spreading through her as she looked at the ground in horror. Whatever laid dying in her chest moments before felt like it had been ripped out and strangled to death in one smooth motion.
The right side of her face was on fire and she lifted a hand to touch her cheek. As she did, raw, searing pain shot through and she let out the tiniest of whimpers. She pulled her hand away and looked at it, seeing a small dot of red on her finger.
Buffy hit her so hard that she was bleeding.
Buffy did this.
It kept happening on repeat, over and over in her head in a loop.
"Maddie," Buffy began, sounding like she was on the verge of tears.
Her chest felt like a black pit that had sucked in anything good or bright and left her with nothing but pain and disgust and something worse than anything else. Something she hadn't felt since Marie stuck a dagger in her stomach. "Get away from me."
She could hear Buffy's breathing quicken and heard her footsteps getting closer. "Maddie, I'm so sorry..."
"Go!" Maddie shouted as loud as she could, her voice breaking. She couldn't look up now. She couldn't let Buffy see all that pain and fear. All of the hate swallowing her up.
She slowly got to her feet and turned away. She knew Buffy didn't move and wouldn't if she turned around, so she ran. She ran as fast as she could, passing Xander's car and headed toward Stiles' jeep. She almost collided with it and came to an unsteady halt just before, placing her hands on the hood to keep herself upright.
Maddie should've been something more than angry, sad maybe. She should've been crying but she couldn't. She couldn't will the tears to come. There was nothing and it only made her angrier. She wanted to hit something, repeatedly. She wanted to feel something more than rage.
Instead, she focused on her breathing. She had to control something. Anything.
Why was she so god damn out of breath?
It was a while before she heard a car door open and close in the distance. There was a long, tense moment of silence and she wondered if Xander would be next, or Willow. Would they force her to leave? Drag her kicking and screaming? She didn't know anymore.
Time passed at a snail's pace until the engine of the Camry rumbled back to life.
It sounded like there was almost a hesitation as she heard the low crackling of gravel under the wheels as the ebbed and faded into the night.
of her - an important part - was leaving with them and she wanted to scream as loud as she could until her voice was gone. Instead she squeezed her hands into fists with all of her strength, nails digging painfully into her palms and arms shaking.
There was no telling how long she stayed that way, standing there alone in the heavy, thick silence. She couldn't tell how many times she replayed the moment in her head but it was all she could see, over and over again on some sick loop. She needed to do something, to fight something.
It dawned on her that she was also alone in the more physical, present sense. In the 'Stiles was here not too long ago' sense, to be more accurate.
This whole thing started without her.
Was she gone that long?
Maddie pulled away from the jeep, still unsteady on her feet, and clumsily walked around to the door of the warehouse.
As she stood there, a few feet from the open entrance, something felt wrong, like a warning. She felt as if she was in front of something. Still, she moved forward until she slammed face first into nothing and it felt like a wall.
She stumbled back a step, looking around. There was no wall blocking her. It was then that she looked at the ground, a line of black ash stretching to her left and right and all the way around the building, out of sight. She raised a hand and pressed against the invisible force field. It didn't hurt to touch but it was certainly solid, like she could probably lean against it if she wanted to. She considered it, as tired and sore and weak as her whole body was. Still, that would look weird if anyone came out and saw her.
Wasn't this supposed to block out monsters? Did the universe not even see her as human? She didn't have time to think about that now.
That was when Stiles bolted out of the door of the warehouse, spotting her immediately. He just needed to catch her up to speed so she could do something. She needed a goal. She needed to help. To not feel useless. He walked over to her, easily crossing over the mountain ash. "Maddie! Thank god. We have a situation."
"Okay, yeah." She nodded a little too quickly but wasn't able to look him in the eye and her voice still sounded scratchy and weak. "What's going on?"
Stiles paused for a split second, doing a double take of her. Maybe he noticed that she didn't sound quite right. Or worse... "Are you okay?"
Maddie looked up at him, his eyes wide and his eyebrows furrowed. He looked so, so worried for her, and it made her angry all over again. How dare he care so much? Why? She was nothing but mean and violent towards him from day one. She yelled at him for saving her life. She avoided him like the plague because of some dumb dream like it dictated her whole life. She was awful.
Stiles looked even more worried when she didn't answer and something on her face caught his attention. He lifted a hand, slowly raising and gently touching her cheek, just outside the cut. It still stung and she winced, knowing already that it was swelling. When she looked back at him, his eyes were on hers again. "What happened?"
The loop started again. Every terrible word, becoming an exclamation with the Buffy's knuckles across her cheek. She felt raw and exposed and so angry, like some sort of wounded animal. She wanted to hit something, maybe even Stiles. He was such an idiot. Why wouldn't he just leave her alone from the beginning? Why did he have to be right here?
She was crumbling to nothing and in that instant, she felt herself lunge forward and saw him flinch.
She hugged him. Maddie hugged him so tight, her arms around his neck like if she let go, she'd collapse. She might've. She couldn't explain it. She couldn't comprehend the moment; she only knew how unfathomably hollow she her chest was and that he wouldn't push her away. She squeezed her eyes shut and, after a few seconds, she felt his arms loop around her back. He didn't say anything at all, she just held her against him for a long moment. He was so warm and steady that she was afraid to let go. This...it was the only moment all day that made sense and didn't hurt.
The rapid drumming of footsteps called her attention and Stiles must've heard it too because they both immediately let go to turn and see who it was. Derek acknowledged both of them but thankfully not whatever moment the two just had. Unfortunately, Stiles wasn't quite as smooth about it.
"Hey! Um..." He shook his head quickly, probably regaining his focus before looking at Derek again and gesturing to the warehouse. "Yeah, so...We kinda lost Jackson inside, but it's-"
"You what?!" Maddie cut him off and Stiles looked over at her in shock, most likely expecting this reaction from Derek. Whatever fuzziness in her head sharpened in that moment, thoughts circling back to the matter at hand and the firm grip she could have on it.
He didn't have time to answer as Isaac and Erica ran outside through the door, both of them looking down almost instantly. Isaac walked closer to the line of mountain ash and back up at Erica.
"Oh my god! It's working!" Stiles shouted, sounded far more excited than any of the others looked. Maddie shot him a glance and she noticed that Derek was still looking at the warehouse, far more concerned. Stiles, of course, was grinning his wide, goofy grin, swelling with pride. "This is...! I did something!"
"And now we can't help anyone in there," Maddie said, motioning to Derek. It was definitely a new experience to consider her and Derek a united front but they seemed to have common goals for the moment. Derek gave her a knowing look, as if he knew the mountain ash would affect her this way.
Stiles turned to her with a questioning glance. "Wait, we?"
Maddie rolled her eyes but the light moment didn't last as a howl roared over the music from much farther away.
"Scott?" Derek asked quietly and suddenly Maddie's alarm rose.
Stiles glanced at him again, confused. "What?"
"Break it." Derek's voice was calm but there was something urgent in it.
Stiles looked down at the mountain ash and back up at Derek incredulously. "What? No way!"
"Scott's dying!"
"Okay, what? How do you know that?"
"Oh my god, Stiles! I just know! Break it!"
Stiles quickly bent down and swiped a break in the line of ash. The feeling of a wall standing between Maddie and the warehouse lifted instantly and Derek ran across the rest and out of sight. Part of her was ready to run in and help but instead before she did, she mumbled, "If there was ever a question of what a slayer really is..."
"Mads, you're not a monster."
She turned to Stiles, a weak flare of anger making her sound bitter. "How would you know? Are you some sort of demonology expert?"
"No, I just know you. You care too much." Her face fell and she gaped at him slightly for a moment. He sent her a sad smile and nodded toward the building. "Go do your 'hero' thing."
Maddie nodded and sprinted into the warehouse while patrons pushed their way out. She dodged several people rushing to the exit but, within the first few moments she was inside, collided with one. She shook off the momentary shock and focused her vision on a familiar girl, the one she brushed off in the hallway weeks ago. The one that was with Allison earlier today. The stare the girl gave Maddie was more of a glower, honestly. Maddie mumbled a "sorry" but stopped again, remembering the words she said to the girl that day.
"Get out while you still can."
She stopped as the blonde passed her and turned as she called back, "...I'm sorry."
There was a brief pause and the blonde stopped. Maddie could've sworn she heard a low, empty laugh.
The girl turned around and sauntered over to Maddie, a smile on her lips. Not a normal smile though; the type of smile Kate had on her face when she pointed her gun at Scott's head or when she found Marie with-...with the bodies. It felt wrong. The girl's eyes narrowed. "You're sorry?"
The girl was Maddie's height but her aura felt massive, a monstrous shadow stretching over them. Maddie tilted her head and studied the girl but in a flash, the blonde threw her across the room and she fell hard on the concrete floor. More cracked ribs. She landed wrong on her arm and the blinding pain of the way it bent under her weight.
Before she could get up, the blonde was in front of her and her hand clasped tightly around Maddie's neck. Slowly, she was lifted up from the ground, grasping at the girl's arm and coughing. Her windpipes closed completely and she could feel her lungs shriveling up. The girl smiled again but her voice came out as a growl. "Run along home, Slayer. I'm not your problem yet."
The blonde let go and Maddie crumbled to the floor as she strolled out. On the floor of the club that was now dead silent, Maddie coughed as she tried to suck in a breath Everything was so glaringly wrong, more than she ever thought possible.
☽ † ☾
"We gotta go back," Xander pleaded, his tone quiet. Angry, maybe.
Buffy stared out the window, scenery passing in shadows against the moonlight. They'd passed the 'Now Leaving Beacon Hills' sign a while back and headed north, towards home. It was a mistake. The whole thing. They should've never handed this mission over to Madeline. She wasn't ready and now it didn't matter if she was ready or not. Buffy's gaze was distant, glassy. She shook her head. "No, we can't."
"Well, we have to do something, right?" Willow replied as she looked at Xander and then to Buffy, ever the mediator, concern written all over her face. "We can't just leave them there alone. They need someone, both of them. A Watcher, at least."
"We don't exactly have enough goin' around to send over there," Xander countered. "There's about one Watcher for every fifty slayers. It's not exactly a sought after position."
"We have trainees," Willow said but her voice wavered. "...But I'm pretty sure that's how this mess started."
"Yeah, sending a junior Watcher to the field might just make the situation nuclear," Xander quipped, his tone flat.
There was a pause before they heard Buffy from the backseat. "Send the best one we've got."
"Travers?" Xander asked aloud and a shudder of familiarity ran through Buffy across time. "...I don't think she's ready. And I'm not really looking to relive the Wesley situation."
"Then we don't send her alone," Buffy added as if a light had been switched on in her brain. "We send someone familiar with her situation."
"That's mostly just us." Xander looked at Buffy in the rearview mirror. "...and I'm pretty sure that was covered in the 'we should go back' portion of our conversation."
Willow gasped loudly and the greens of her irises almost glowed.
"Ooh! No! I mean, yeah but..." She smiled for the first time in the entire trip. "There is someone."
The car drove off into the night and two phone calls were made.