Helping Lena - Chapter 21: Chapter 21
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Olivia's pov
I could see the panic in Anna's face. She was biting on her lip and bouncing her leg up and down. I felt terrible not being able to comfort her, I don't know what Lena's response will be. I feel freaked out too.
Anna and I were sitting in the kitchen while Lena was playing with her toys in the living room. We told Lena we were getting snacks.
"What if she is disgusted by me Liv. I don't want to lose her" Anna's voice cracked slightly.
"Hey, we never know. She might just agree to it. It could've been on her mind but was scared to ask. Breastfeeding is a very intimate thing. There has to be complete trust and that is exactly what you two have" I whispered while hugging her. I hope it works out.
"Thank you Liv. Without you, I don't even know what I would have done" her laughter vibrated in my chest. I felt my heart warm up at being able to make her laugh. God, I love this woman so much.
"Should we call Lena now?" I asked staring into her green eyes as I held her face in my hand.
"Yea" she whispered smiling at me. So beautiful. I could not resist and peck her in the lips.
Anna's pov
"Lena, honey come have your snack please" Liv called out. I heard little footsteps run into the kitchen.
"Snack!" Lena screech in excitement. We couldn't help ourselves and burst out in laughter. She looked between us and started laughing. I'm sure she has no idea what is going on.
"In pease" she asked politely with a big smile on her face. She was standing next to her high chair.
"Not now, baby. We were hoping to talk to big Lena for a bit" I said sadly as I watched her face fall. I'm glad she liked her high chair though.
"Okays" she moped and took a seat next to Liv. Liv rubbed her back and moved her snack in front of her.
Liv and I just watched her eat. I could see her come out of head space as her demeanour change as she tried to make herself small. I really wanted big Lena to become more comfortable with us but I know that will take some time. I'm glad little Lena loves us.
"What do you guys want to talk about" she lifted up her head and chewed on a piece of carrot stick.
"We wanted to talk about what happen at the mall..... with that man" I sigh. It send shivers down my spine thinking about it.
I watched her fidget and fear set in her eyes. Tears welled up in her eyes. Liv immediately pulled her in a hug and rubbed her back, whispering reassurance.
"Little me wanted the stuffy. I guess I thought it was a good idea to sneak away from you guys. When I came there, I looked around for a stuffy and that's when I felt a hands on my shoulder, gripping it tightly..." tears were running down her face at this point including mine. Liv's eyes were glistening.
"He called himself my daddy and that he was going to take me home with him. I was scared so Anna. Liv he said he was going to punish me when we get to his home, I didn't want to go with him" she looked desperately at us.
"Just before you guys came, you was going to take me. I've never felt so much fear in my life. I'm so sorry, thank you for coming to my rescue" she looked at us with big eyes and a tiny smile on her face. I could see the gratefulness on her face.
"Baby, whenever or wherever you need us, we will always be there. We love you so much, sweetheart" I sniffled while laughing. I moved from my seat and pulled Lena and Liv in a big hug.
"We are so happy that you came in our life, honey" Liv kissed her head as Lena nodded.
"I'm glad you came into my life, I love you...... Mama and Mommy"
"Oh god.." I was now full on crying like a baby. How did we deserve such a sweetheart.
"You don't know how glad I am you said that. I thought it was on accident" I sniffled wiping my tears away. Liv was trying to discreetly wipe it away.
"I was a little nervous to call you guys mommy and mama. I feel so much better" Lena breathed a sigh out of relief. But not much me. I was still nervous.
"There is one more thing I was meaning to ask you" I looked at Liv and she gave me a nod of encouragement.
"What is it" Lena leaned back and laid her head on Olivia's shoulder. She kissed her stroked Lena's head.
"Whatever Anna ask you, please have a open mind. It's a very intimate question and she is quite nervous to ask" Liv said while Lena looked confused at me. I just nodded my head.
"Yeah, no problem" Lena smiled at me and nod her head for me to continue.
"Have you-umm-I don't know why this is so hard" Lena looked extra confused now. I gave an awkward smile while Liv looked like she could burst out of laughter anytime.
What a great support system!!
"Some littles have a younger spectrum. And they would go into a newborn headspace. When they in a newborn headspace, they not able to digest solids and there would drink formula of for some would breastfeed" I raised my brows hoping she would get but I was dead wrong.
"I have read about it yes. Some caregivers breastfeed their littles and it's normal to them. It makes their bond stronger"she said. Good she doesn't have a problem with that.
"As I was trying to say, have you ever thought about being breastfed. I know it sounds weird and you'll be probably weirded out. I was hoping that I could have that bond with you, you know" I watch her eyes widen.
"I- I don't know what to say" she frowned at me, look dumbfounded. Oh.
"Oh-umm okay. That's okay, we'll this conversation for another day. Let's go watch some Moana. That's your favourite" I softly smiled as I felt my heart fell. Liv gave me a sad smile. I hurriedly stood up and made my way to the living room.
"Wait! You never let me finish" Lena's voice came louder than we ever heard her making me stop dead in tracks.
"I can't say I never thought about. I was scared to bring it up and I thought you would be weirded out by me and pushed it at the back of my mind. But I'm willing to try" Lena whispered out to me. I turned around and watched her looked at me with her big hazel eyes with a pleading look.
"Are you sure, sweetheart?" I asked frantically. I need to know this is real.
"I am, I'm sure mama" I rushed to her and picked her up as I swing her around. Her sweet little giggles infiltrated my hears as her arms wrapped around my neck.
"I love you baby" I pecker her cheeks with numerous kisses.
"No mowe mama" she giggled, playfully trying to pull me away. She slipped.
"Sorry baby, mama's just so happy" I sat her on my hip and mouthed a thank you to Liv. She tipped an imaginary hat making us fall into a fit of giggles.
What a great day so far!
Did you guys ever feel disconnected with your book? Out of nowhere I suddenly got this feeling.
I could see the panic in Anna's face. She was biting on her lip and bouncing her leg up and down. I felt terrible not being able to comfort her, I don't know what Lena's response will be. I feel freaked out too.
Anna and I were sitting in the kitchen while Lena was playing with her toys in the living room. We told Lena we were getting snacks.
"What if she is disgusted by me Liv. I don't want to lose her" Anna's voice cracked slightly.
"Hey, we never know. She might just agree to it. It could've been on her mind but was scared to ask. Breastfeeding is a very intimate thing. There has to be complete trust and that is exactly what you two have" I whispered while hugging her. I hope it works out.
"Thank you Liv. Without you, I don't even know what I would have done" her laughter vibrated in my chest. I felt my heart warm up at being able to make her laugh. God, I love this woman so much.
"Should we call Lena now?" I asked staring into her green eyes as I held her face in my hand.
"Yea" she whispered smiling at me. So beautiful. I could not resist and peck her in the lips.
Anna's pov
"Lena, honey come have your snack please" Liv called out. I heard little footsteps run into the kitchen.
"Snack!" Lena screech in excitement. We couldn't help ourselves and burst out in laughter. She looked between us and started laughing. I'm sure she has no idea what is going on.
"In pease" she asked politely with a big smile on her face. She was standing next to her high chair.
"Not now, baby. We were hoping to talk to big Lena for a bit" I said sadly as I watched her face fall. I'm glad she liked her high chair though.
"Okays" she moped and took a seat next to Liv. Liv rubbed her back and moved her snack in front of her.
Liv and I just watched her eat. I could see her come out of head space as her demeanour change as she tried to make herself small. I really wanted big Lena to become more comfortable with us but I know that will take some time. I'm glad little Lena loves us.
"What do you guys want to talk about" she lifted up her head and chewed on a piece of carrot stick.
"We wanted to talk about what happen at the mall..... with that man" I sigh. It send shivers down my spine thinking about it.
I watched her fidget and fear set in her eyes. Tears welled up in her eyes. Liv immediately pulled her in a hug and rubbed her back, whispering reassurance.
"Little me wanted the stuffy. I guess I thought it was a good idea to sneak away from you guys. When I came there, I looked around for a stuffy and that's when I felt a hands on my shoulder, gripping it tightly..." tears were running down her face at this point including mine. Liv's eyes were glistening.
"He called himself my daddy and that he was going to take me home with him. I was scared so Anna. Liv he said he was going to punish me when we get to his home, I didn't want to go with him" she looked desperately at us.
"Just before you guys came, you was going to take me. I've never felt so much fear in my life. I'm so sorry, thank you for coming to my rescue" she looked at us with big eyes and a tiny smile on her face. I could see the gratefulness on her face.
"Baby, whenever or wherever you need us, we will always be there. We love you so much, sweetheart" I sniffled while laughing. I moved from my seat and pulled Lena and Liv in a big hug.
"We are so happy that you came in our life, honey" Liv kissed her head as Lena nodded.
"I'm glad you came into my life, I love you...... Mama and Mommy"
"Oh god.." I was now full on crying like a baby. How did we deserve such a sweetheart.
"You don't know how glad I am you said that. I thought it was on accident" I sniffled wiping my tears away. Liv was trying to discreetly wipe it away.
"I was a little nervous to call you guys mommy and mama. I feel so much better" Lena breathed a sigh out of relief. But not much me. I was still nervous.
"There is one more thing I was meaning to ask you" I looked at Liv and she gave me a nod of encouragement.
"What is it" Lena leaned back and laid her head on Olivia's shoulder. She kissed her stroked Lena's head.
"Whatever Anna ask you, please have a open mind. It's a very intimate question and she is quite nervous to ask" Liv said while Lena looked confused at me. I just nodded my head.
"Yeah, no problem" Lena smiled at me and nod her head for me to continue.
"Have you-umm-I don't know why this is so hard" Lena looked extra confused now. I gave an awkward smile while Liv looked like she could burst out of laughter anytime.
What a great support system!!
"Some littles have a younger spectrum. And they would go into a newborn headspace. When they in a newborn headspace, they not able to digest solids and there would drink formula of for some would breastfeed" I raised my brows hoping she would get but I was dead wrong.
"I have read about it yes. Some caregivers breastfeed their littles and it's normal to them. It makes their bond stronger"she said. Good she doesn't have a problem with that.
"As I was trying to say, have you ever thought about being breastfed. I know it sounds weird and you'll be probably weirded out. I was hoping that I could have that bond with you, you know" I watch her eyes widen.
"I- I don't know what to say" she frowned at me, look dumbfounded. Oh.
"Oh-umm okay. That's okay, we'll this conversation for another day. Let's go watch some Moana. That's your favourite" I softly smiled as I felt my heart fell. Liv gave me a sad smile. I hurriedly stood up and made my way to the living room.
"Wait! You never let me finish" Lena's voice came louder than we ever heard her making me stop dead in tracks.
"I can't say I never thought about. I was scared to bring it up and I thought you would be weirded out by me and pushed it at the back of my mind. But I'm willing to try" Lena whispered out to me. I turned around and watched her looked at me with her big hazel eyes with a pleading look.
"Are you sure, sweetheart?" I asked frantically. I need to know this is real.
"I am, I'm sure mama" I rushed to her and picked her up as I swing her around. Her sweet little giggles infiltrated my hears as her arms wrapped around my neck.
"I love you baby" I pecker her cheeks with numerous kisses.
"No mowe mama" she giggled, playfully trying to pull me away. She slipped.
"Sorry baby, mama's just so happy" I sat her on my hip and mouthed a thank you to Liv. She tipped an imaginary hat making us fall into a fit of giggles.
What a great day so far!
Did you guys ever feel disconnected with your book? Out of nowhere I suddenly got this feeling.
End of Helping Lena Chapter 21. Continue reading Chapter 22 or return to Helping Lena book page.