How to Make a Sinner Sleep - Chapter 30: Chapter 30

There wasn't anything else worth noting in the whispers and hushed dealings occurring in the bar. Signs of corruption and filthy deeds, perhaps, but nothing more.
The three were well aware of what they could presently investigate and knew when it became too much. Three students could hardly make a change in the twisted underground of the kingdom.
At least, not right away. Not as long as they remained powerless bystanders in the vast lands.
Niklas had concluded their meeting first, yawning with a hint of sleepiness in his voice. It was already late into the night, or early morning, to be exact.
The guard at the door nodded to them, violet eyes lingering after Kaden's passing figure. The latter, in response, glanced over briefly before leaving.
They waved farewell to Niklas within the dormitories, avoiding the front desk where Noya observed miscreant students who tried to slip in late. Kaden wondered if she ever slept—but knew her caution was warranted, and that the woman truly wanted to protect their safety.
Flicking the light on in their room, the pair, one dragon and one human, got ready for sleep without a word.
Noah changed the light to the lamp, casting a dim yet warm hue over the sleepy atmosphere. He naturally climbed into his bed, moving closer to the wall as he left a body space beside him.
Kaden, whose feet had habitually turned to the dragon's bed, froze and spun around. He hastily climbed into his own bed, throwing the covers over.
"You can turn off the light now." He said, staring at the ceiling as a pair of sharp eyes bored into him deeply.
Thinking that they were getting far too used to sleeping together, and that his nightmares had long gone, it was time to stop abusing Noah's kindness. To begin with, getting used to the slow and steady heartbeats wasn't something he should do.
Noah continued to stare silently, refusing to turn off the light as Kaden had asked.
Then he asked slowly, "You're sleeping over there?"
It seemed to contain sulking complaints, melted with the low and hoarse voice that clearly wanted to sleep.
"Yes, of course. Don't miss my company too much, my darling dragon." teased Kaden, feeling slightly awkward. After all, it had been he who relied on Noah's gentleness in order to sleep at night.
He sighed, furrowing his eyebrows in deep thought.
Would the nightmares return with the loss of the rhythmic beat of life beside his ear? Well, he would attempt it for a few nights.
If it was simply a heartbeat he needed to heat, then it didn't have to be Noah.
For some reason, he decided against saying that aloud.
Additionally, that odd cat he brought back was still going under the process of investigation... after it was done, Kaden could hold the animal to sleep instead.
Noah pursed his lips, contorting his beautiful and indifferent expression into annoyance as his white hair fell over the side of his face, peering at the lump in the bed across from him.
The lump that was similar to a human heat pack, warming his cold body in the dead night. Noah felt a chilling breeze, even under his covers.
He frowned, pulling a pillow to his chest, but it was unable to replicate the lost heat that he'd grown accustomed to. The orange light remained on in their stubborn silence.
The dragon's frown deepened with great reluctance.
Kaden kept his eyes closed, refusing to glance over. Faintly, he heard rustling in the bed beside him, ignoring the movements.
He even pretended to snore, a soft grunt of noise, in order to convince the other that he was sleeping perfectly fine alone. Unfortunately, Kaden was no actor, and Noah wasn't blind.
The floorboard creaked, and a shadow was cast over his eyes.
Kaden cracked one eye open curiously as Noah held a pillow under one arm, lowering his dark gaze onto him. Kaden's grip tightened underneath his blankets, tucking the ends underneath his body to form an impenetrable cocoon.
His defense was perfect! Kaden braced for the battle.
"....." Noah raised a hand and grasped a corner, to which Kaden resisted by pressing his entire body weight down with bewilderment.
"What're you doing?"
"Move."
It was a demand.
Kaden rustled further under his covers, cautiously. He forgot his teasing persona, revealing a look of sleepy surprise. "Absolutely not. You look terrifying. Go to sleep."
"I intend to," said Noah dully as Kaden tried to shake off his sharp grip. However, a dragon's vice was its clingy claws that latched onto things, impossible to remove.
Kaden grew more frantic, and also increasingly confused. "Let go?"
Noah stared at him deeply, his lips curled into a displeased frown. For a second, Kaden saw the mirage of a sulking animal staring sullenly at him.
"Why?"
"Ha? Why can't you sleep with me? Because I'm not in the mood, obviously?"
Two stubborn people clung to the blanket, one trying to hold it tightly underneath, and the other trying to lift it up to make some room.
A bystander might think of how childish their predicament was, but it was far too late into the sleepless night for either party to consider that.
All Kaden knew was one thing: He would sleep on his own bed tonight.
And all Noah knew was one thing: He would sleep on Kaden's bed tonight.
Finally, the dragon gave into failure, releasing his hold as Kaden peeked his eyes out cautiously, suspicion lining his gaze, though he was relieved to have won the battle.
Just as that relief settled, Noah rolled the bundle that was Kaden to the edge.
He took a spot like a straight and heated log, placing the pillow under his head. His mindset was simple, dull with a lack of sleep.
If Kaden wouldn't let him in, then he would just sleep on top.
After all, Kaden's body heat radiated enough warmth for Noah to sleep comfortably, with or without blankets. He considered grabbing his own from his bed, but felt too lazy to get up again.
Once trapped in the prison of bed, it was near impossible to escape.
Especially after finding a comfortable spot with much struggle, the perfect position that was neither too hot nor too cold. Abandoning that perfect sleeping position would be foolish.
If Kaden was a cat, his hair would've stood on the end in surprise, with a twirling tail standing frozen and straight in the air.
Out of sheer shock, and his typically wise mind lacking all semblance of intelligence at his exhaustion, he directly struck off a long leg, kicking Noah's heavy body off.
The dragon landed on the floor with a bewildered thud.
Kaden gulped. "....."
Noah turned his head slowly. "......"
It was a vicious scene, straight out of a horror novel. Kaden imagined all the ways he would be slain in that instant.
The next second, the dragon stubbornly slipped onto the bed again, pushing Kaden closer to the wall and pinning the edges of the blankets down so that so disobedient limbs couldn't kick him again.
Kaden struggled futility under the covers. "You're hot and heavy, get off! Why are you so determined to sleep with me?!"
Noah stared at him with calm eyes before throwing a long, weighted arm over the bundle. "You're warm."
Reason slapped Kaden in the face, startled by the plain and stubborn reason behind it. Finally, he decided to give up and lie down. Why was he arguing and fighting with this man—it was only sharing one bed?
He sighed. The issue was that he didn't want to grow too accustomed to Noah's presence beside him, relying on the dragon to cure his insomnia.
However, now that he knew that the sound of heartbeats could help cure his sleepless nights, he could find another partner after abandoning Noah in the future.
Therefore, presently, he would simply relent to Noah's wishes.
Noah felt the person beside him settle down and opened his narrow eyes, observing any other movements. Instead, the sound of soft breathing filled the air. Noah's harsh expression softened, unknown to the sleeping man in his arms.
The dragon curled his body closer against the bundle of warmth, closing his eyes to the world as their separate sounds of breathing blended into a steady fusion.
Unfortunately, visiting the bar again roused the faded memories of Kaden, who stirred uncomfortably in his sleep, caged between an arm and the bed. His body grew restless, sweat dripping down his forehead as he scrunched his brows tightly.
Delusion filled his mind, coating every corner and crevice until there was nothing left of him to grasp reality.
He was sitting at a table for two, a platter of sweets piled delicately before him, with a steaming cup of tea set in a porcelain cup. Kaden blinked in surprise before his expression resumed a neutral air and he stated knowingly,
"This is a dream."
He lowered his eyes to the stone pathway leading up to the table, tufts of weed stubbornly growing in the fine and narrow cracks.
A soft clatter of a heel echoed behind him, and for a moment, the ground glitched, flicking between endless darkness and the bright stone pathway. Kaden narrowed his eyes sharply as a flowing dress passed him, moving in the breeze.
"This is a dream." He repeated, more to himself than any other.
The chair on the opposite site grated against the stone as somebody took a seat down gently. Their set gaze rested on his avoidance appearance.
The voice that was naturally soft and gentle, like a mother's loving embrace.
"Dear, it's been so long." A smile that was sewn into her sweet voice, delighted and pure. "How have you been?"
Sweat beaded Kaden's forehead as his expression grew pale, a restless shudder in his legs that remained planted to the ground. His fingers curled against his pants, distorting the fabric along with his face.
"...You seem to still blame yourself for what happened."
He resisted the urge to throw his head up and shout, "Blame? How could I not—how can you make it sound as if I wasn't the one who killed you!"
He must've been delusional, dreaming as if Rosa Alexandra Chauvet could forgive him in her afterlife. No, it was worse believing that she might, that even after his actions, she could choose to believe in him.
To trust in that miserable, pathetic child she tended to.
The one who bared his fangs at his saviour, instead of the man who damned him to hell.
Kaden hated the him who refused to lift his head in this nightmare, terrified to see two bloody sockets for eyes, scared to see an expression of hatred scarring her beautiful memory.
To see crimson bleeding from her chest where he'd stabbed her, dripping slowly while the soothing smile remained glued to her face.
"Kaden—"
"I killed you."
His shaking voice interrupted firmly, rejecting any words of comfort his mind might trick him with. A helpless smile curled up his lips as he held back low sobs, wretched and foolish tears.
"You are dead, and I was the one who killed you. The one who could've set this country into bountiful times, the lovely and righteous heir to the throne."
He choked. "I killed you."
There was an interlude of silence before she spoke again. "...sweet child. Do you... intend to live this life of yours in regret again?"
"No, I will live it to my fullest. I'll save those I hope to, and live more freely than I have before, unshackled by chains."
"And then?"
What would happen after, when Kaden became satisfied with his life? What happened after he did all he cared to do, which for a man who once had nothing but his name, wasn't much?
A cold sheen replaced any sadness in his eyes, lips settling into a thin line.
"And then I'll accept any punishment. And I'll allow the heavy weight of judgment to sever my ties with reality once again."
"...that simply wouldn't do—"
"I am aware." Kaden relaxed, smiling though his head still refused to meet the ghost in front of him, a subtle rejection. "I'm not that self-sacrificing, nor do I possess that much self-hatred. I'm a bastard, born and made."
"What do you mean—"
"It's rather simple. I will proceed as I have been, and approach things as they come. I'm not a kind or gentle person. Therefore, I do have intentions of living my life properly after everything has been settled."
A distant voice blended with Rosa's gentle tone, making Kaden frown in confusion. His head throbbed. "Do you mean it? Can you swear it, Kaden Chauvet?"
Who was it speaking to him at this moment?
He felt the wind snake around his neck like a pair of large hands, beating with a scarlet flame of life. He sat paralyzed in the chair as Rosa's voice, mixed with the other strange tone, continued.
"What do you most desire, Kaden Chauvet?"
"I..."
He sought revenge with no regrets. The price to achieving it wouldn't be something he couldn't pay. That was an irrefutable truth.
But ultimately, what did he most desire in this second—no, third life of his? The first that had ended in an empty land, devoid of both company and life. The second that had been cut short before he could achieve any goals.
Kaden's innermost desire hadn't changed, even if his pessimistic thoughts distorted them at times. Even if revenge had to put that wish on hold, temporarily.
He muttered his desire in a soft mutter, as if speaking any louder would deem it void.
"I want to be happy..."
It was a regular, humane desire that many others sought. Yet he spoke it in a forbidden tone, like it was worth more than any treasure could hold. As if happiness were the only thing far away from his grasp.
Kaden's eyes glazed over, muted by some unknown force, as his body felt sluggish and floating, no longer in control of his dream.
In his dull hearing, he heard a calm voice.
"Is that all?"
"...that's all..."
In a quiet and dark room, moonlight carefully nudged the shadows, scattering like starlight against the gloom. Noah's eyes remained open, dense eyelashes casting a shadow against his cheeks as he gazed at the curled up figure facing him.
He'd been staring for a while now, at the tightly knitted brows that had eased as Kaden rolled over, tucking into the dragon's embrace as if seeking solace.
Noah obliged by resting his arm over the blankets.
A question had slipped from his lips on a frustrated whim, but the answer was even more unexpected.
"I want to be happy...."
Noah realized how little he understood Kaden at that moment.
The surprise smoothened as he breathed steadily, observing the sleeping figure for a moment longer before confirming, "Is that all?"
"...that's all..."
The dragon's vortex pupils gazed at Kaden through narrowed eyes, contemplating and languid.
The wish of happiness.
Wasn't it both silly and easily obtained? No, Noah knew better than to believe that when life was a sinner that cursed humans with misfortune.
But he was a little curious to see what shape that man's happiness would take. And curiosity led to impulsive, irrational actions that couldn't be explained in words.
Kaden's gloved hand raised slightly as he adjusted his posture, settled beside his cheek. Noah listened to the soft mutters deeply as he lowered his chin, pressing a kiss to the back of the gloved hand, hiding more mysteries he didn't know.
It wasn't a kiss of love or pity.
"Make certain that you achieve that desire, Kaden Chauvet." muttered Noah hoarsely. "So long as that remains your desire, I will give it to you at whatever cost."
No, it was an oath.
One made of obscure sufferings, and a man who wanted to unravel that very history of tragedies. To pull the yarn that wrapped around, and reveal the secret delight inside.
Even if it meant going against fate's decree.