How to Make a Sinner Sleep - Chapter 31: Chapter 31

Skye's determination to spend time with Kaden increased by a tenfold since the latter escaped by a hair's breath the previous time, being too occupied to have anymore unfortunate encounters with the sunny boy.
"Kaden! I've been trying to find you for ages now, but we've been missing each other." exclaimed the youth mournfully as he ran up to the other with a bright gaze.
A book was clutched within his arms, long and looser sleeves that technically went against the proper dress code. However, the teachers weren't overly strict and Skye had protested to being more comfortable in looser clothing.
In his exact words, he felt safer without being confined in tight clothes.
At times, Kaden was curious how the mind of the energetic youth worked, leaping from emotion to emotion at such high turnover rates.
He smiled weakly. "...Skye. I've been busy lately, that's why."
It was difficult to run away from this little brother of his, to say no or to hate the wide spread smile that dripped with pure naivety. But ignorance could be both a blessing and a sin.
"We don't need to go far! Let's go on a walk."
"Skye—"
"Please." begged the youth, his large eyes limpid and pleading. Similar to a small animal that wanted to play, spoiled and free.
Kaden dimly thought to the cat that had followed him all the way back. There were a few more procedures before it could be released, since creatures brought back had the risk of being far too dangerous for a student to handle.
The cat-like creature had tilted its head, meowing softly at Kaden as its nails clung to his shirt. It squealed when being pulled away, putting on an act of a dramatic princess.
Thinking that, he laughed softly under his breath. How such a creature had gotten attached to him was beyond his imagination.
Skye, not realizing Kaden's thoughts, noticed the gentleness that had spread and took it as an opportunity to insist. He smiled brightly and demanded—
—even if he knew that Kaden despised him inside.
The youth held no malicious intent, despite believing in this fact. Because, it was only expected that his adopted older brother would hate him, not sharing the same blood and being abused by Reed daily.
But Skye, foolish and ridiculous as he was, aimlessly attempted to stir Kaden's emotions. To have him smile again, as bright as a pile of shimmering pearls, as he once did in the past.
Kaden sighed, nodding as he offered a wry smile. "Alright, where would you like to go? I haven't really gone around the Academy that much..."
Other than his classes, the library, the cafeteria and the dormitories, he really hadn't explored much. It would be a good opportunity to.
Happiness bloomed on Skye's princely features as he nodded ecstatically.
"Have you visited the Academy's greenhouse? They're growing all sorts of herbs and flowers—nurtured by students."
"I haven't... let's go there, then?"
Skye squinted up at him, hesitating. "You're really agreeing to go with me, right? There's no turning around when we get there, big brother!"
Kaden's entire body radiated conflicting emotions. He never knew how to treat this younger boy, his brother on paper. The only on in the royal family that considered him as one, most likely.
'But Skye, you never once tried to help me.'
An oblivious bystander could not be called completely innocent, either.
However, it was also true that he didn't hate the young boy who lacked a certain capability to feel. Perhaps Kaden's existence was an amusing toy to entertain with.
Kaden nodded. "I promised you."
"That you did." beamed Skye. "I'll lead the way, follow me!"
Kaden's expression softened naturally. Indifference was something easily maintained if it were a natural habit, but not something that could be learned without struggle.
Because humans, by nature, cried over sad things, got mad over frustrating times, felt pain and pity for the tragic. Likewise, Kaden couldn't refuse the younger man a multitude of times and feel nothing.
Sighing in his heart, he followed the younger boy to the greenhouse.
It was a grand thing, the glass reflecting the rays of light from the peeking sun, as petals unfurled along the ground to shape a beautiful spectacle of thriving plants.
Wonder filled Kaden's heart as he stepped onto the stained glass path—an added decoration by a group of students, he'd heard within Skye's rambling. The younger boy eagerly glanced over at Kaden's expression, relieved that his elder brother seemed to enjoy the scene.
After all, he'd especially wandered over the week prior to make sure the flowers were flourishing, and everything could be as perfect as could be!
He'd put some pressure on the students, likely ruining their peaceful times of experimenting with plants and growing various species, but he didn't really care. Kaden's enjoyment was more important—otherwise he would continue avoiding Skye.
"Do you like it, big brother?" wondered Skye, akin to a child hoping for praise.
Kaden nodded honestly. "It's beautiful. I respect the effort the students put into tending for the plants."
How could one not admire burning passion towards a skill, or hobby? The type of passion that created wonder and shaped imagination—as this delightful garden was made of, or Noah's carefully placed words that formed an entire unique reality.
As he grazed the leaf of a plant, watching it curl inward in response to his touch, he heard a rustling at the side.
Curiously, he wandered with quiet footsteps, watching a young woman hum to herself as he adjusted the crooked stem of a pitch black flower. It seemed almost as if it were crumbling, built on ashes of destruction.
However, her eyes held patience to the ugly specimen, carefully tending to its broken body.
"Hey—!" Skye exclaimed suddenly, bounding over to where Kaden stood.
The woman's head snapped up in fright, large eyes rounding in fear as she recognized the two men. She scrambled to posture herself, hiding her dirtied hands behind her back.
"Your—" she stopped herself from referring to them as royalty, which was forbidden at the Academy. "S-Skye Chauvet, Kaden Chauvet. It's a pleasure to see you in the greenhouse."
Kaden stared down at her, disgust filtering on his expression. But not to the woman who nervously glanced up—it was to his very identity. That the divide between noble and poor was so different, that the latter was expected to grovel at their feet.
Skye, however, scowled as he ground his teeth. "What is that?"
"I- This, it's a plant that I'm caring for. It's a delicate species that resembles soot during this time of the year. When... when taken cared of, it can become a beautiful flower."
The younger boy was unimpressed. "It's so ugly! Didn't I inform the students to make sure there was nothing unsightly in the area? You dared to disobey my orders—it seems you're looking down on me?"
His sky blue eyes turned chilling, peering down at the woman as if she were garbage on the side of the street.
Anger filled his bones, boiling his blood. If this blight ruined Kaden's experience in the greenhouse, then the man would likely never agree to go on another walk! Skye's efforts would be for nothing!
He wanted everything to be absolutely perfect, and the slightest grime stirred great frustration within him.
Then came a torrent of fear.
That Kaden would reject him again the next time, again and again because of this one mistake. That he would never see the brilliant smile on his brother's face—the only one who treated him as family.
"How dare you..."
Kaden, in that moment, squatted down in front of the girl. She stared with great fright, trembling at the blonde-haired prince behind. Her eyes trailed over to Kaden, shrinking back.
He looked calmly over at the flower with a crooked spine.
"What sort of appearance does it take after the ash sheds?"
She trembled, but answered with well-learned intelligence. "It's an 11-petal flower, with a center that resembles a black diamond with hints of wisping red, like rising flames in its center."
"Even garbage can become a treasure, hm?"
The woman paused, the fear chased away from her vision as she stared at the muttering melancholic man deeply.
She shook her head. "It was never garbage to begin with. The flower was nicknamed Phoenix. It births beauty from its own destruction—from the very beginning, its destiny was to rise again as something far more majestic than any could imagine."
Kaden blinked sideways in surprise at the sudden meaning before laughing out loud, drawing a contrast with his cold, cruel features.
"What an interesting story."
Skye pursed his lips, squinting at Kaden's side profile. He didn't seem to be upset or displeased... but even so, their perfect walk had been ruined, hadn't it?
"Kaden—"
"Skye." The man turned his head, losing his smile as the younger tensed his shoulders. "Apologize."
"What? Why should I—that thing could've ruined your day! It messed up my plans, and ruins the atmosphere or the garden!" sulked the spoiled prince.
Kaden stared at him deeply. "A dirty thing like that ruins the beauty?"
"Yeah! You think so too, right?"
"Do I have that right?"
Skye faltered, flinching slightly. "What? What do you mean?"
Kaden regained a gentle smile, but there was no kindness hidden behind it. Only obedience and a mask of politeness remained. "Skye, do you know the reason why I never directly turn you down?"
"...No... but it's because you're too kind, big brother! Even if—"
—even if you hate me.
The unspoken words seem to have been understood by Kaden, who shook his head slowly in understanding.
"I haven't refused you, nor do I plan to in the future. But not out of kindness, or pity." said Kaden calmly, a buried layer of sardonic mocking wedged in his throat. "I can't refuse you, because I know where I stand."
"W-what?"
"I am the blight of the royal family—a dog for you to command." Kaden chuckled darkly, revealing a rare smile at Skye. "Am I anything more than a toy for you to play with?"
"You're... You're mistaken!"
Skye's blood felt chilled to the core. Such words spoken with vivid indifference, as if stating an irrefutable fact that couldn't be altered, made horror fill the young man's body.
Not once, had he thought of looking down on Kaden for his commoner blood. But perhaps the very thought of labeling Kaden as 'different', because he was no genius or royalty, was what made the other an outcast to begin with.
A flash of pity filled Kaden's solemn gaze.
It had been clear to him since he was younger, the evident divide. When Reed and Skye clashed, it was both due to a conflicting way of living and also a cold competition that was based off respect.
To see somebody as a rival, or to be wary of somebody, one often had to admit it was because they believed the other party to be capable of disastrous things.
Yet, the young and pathetic Kaden who barely knew how to read, was treated as a dog to manipulate by Reed, and an affectionate puppy to seek the love of by Skye.
From the beginning, hadn't they always looked down on him?
All because he was inferior.
But who really got to determine whether a person was less than another? Who determined that those without talent could never become anything?
He couldn't help but wonder... had they ever looked at him as a human being?
Shaking himself free from such dragging thoughts, he turned to the woman's whose gaze changed, flickering with an inquisitive wonder.
"I don't recommend committing this situation to memory." said the man with a slight smile that seemed to lack any warmth. "Unless you're eager to bear the consequences of knowing."
The woman shivered, and shook her head hastily. Smiling politely, she gathered up her books and bowed quickly, before hurrying away.
Skye stood still, expression distorted. Kaden glanced back and shook his head with a low sigh, poking at the pitch black flower. Regardless, that youth probably wouldn't understand Kaden's thoughts, even if he was shaken at the moment.
A lifetime of ignorance couldn't be reversed with a few words.
Kaden suddenly longed for the quiet presence of the dragon, closing his eyes as he heard the illusion of pencil scratching on paper. It would stop every few moments, as Noah thought of a new idea, before furiously continuing.
He would listen to a flip as a new page begun, a continuation of the story, or a brand new chapter of adventure.
Noah wouldn't say a word, displaying a rare sight of patience even as Kaden peeked over his shoulder, or leaned closer to read the appearing words, fast as they came.
The peaceful moments in the library had become a solace to Kaden.
Where he could nestle into an unknown world, forgetting the troublesome realities of life, and delude himself into thinking he was anything but himself. Honestly, he didn't know how to describe it.
The feeling as pencil turned into words, and words became sentences that built into the chapters that connected into a story. Watching Noah's inner thoughts write themselves before his gaze in an odd display of vulnerability.
If Kaden had to say something, it was that watching a person write made them seem exposed and filled to the brim with emotion.
He had made himself a hobby, observing Noah like that.
"Kaden?"
Skye's clean voice cut through Kaden's wandering thoughts, teetering him back to the blooming flowers surrounding.
"Crouch down beside me, Skye." said Kaden, with an air of distant politeness. However, the younger bounded over with a frown, blinking several times slowly in confusion.
"Aren't you upset with me?"
"If I was, can you tell me the reason why I would be?"
"I can't."
"Then there's no point in being angry with somebody who can't understand." said Kaden simply, holding no expectations for the other. He gestured towards the flower, it's spine crooked and leaves furled. "In the future, I like this flower the most."
Skye's confusion deepened as he stretched a hand out like a child, prodding at the stem. "I don't get it. It's so ugly, and should one not covet beautiful things?"
"There are those who can love the ugly and broken."
"Why?"
"Because even broken things have the right to be loved. Why shouldn't one love ugly or broken things?"
"Because they're ugly."
Kaden wondered, "And why should one love beautiful things?"
"Because they're beautiful." answered Skye.
"And what separates the beautiful and the ugly, what determines which category something falls in? And what right do you have to label a thing that is not yours to own or claim?"
Skye stared at him, musing, and nodded obediently. He jumped to his feet, spinning around. To be truthful, he didn't really understand Kaden's sudden rumination, nor did he particularly care to understand.
"Whatever the case, did you enjoy our walk, big brother?"
Kaden stood up, patting the dirt of his trousers. "I enjoyed looking at the flowers."
"Then! Shall we... perhaps... visit again, sometime?"
"We can."
Skye beamed, jumping with excitement. He waved farewell after Kaden asked to be left alone for a few moments, dashing into the distance.
The lonely man stared in a daze at the broken flower, lifting his palm into the air. Clouds had filled into the clean canvas of the sky, almost appearing close enough to touch.
"Phoenix." he muttered, a whisper buried under his breath.
Even if he was burned to the ground, would he rise from the ashes again?