How to Make a Sinner Sleep - Chapter 38: Chapter 38

Arlo happily jumped onto the creaking bed made of old, but good quality wood. There was nothing elaborate or fancy about such a place, unlike the Academy or the castle, but Kaden felt more comfortable that way.
It was a small room, cramped with little room to move around, but it was enough. To Arlo, it was fascinating and utterly wonderful.
Even if the boy had grown cynical over years, it couldn't be helped that he hadn't seen such sights before. There was a childish innocence and wonder that couldn't be buried.
Kaden slipped his bag off, packed with some snacks and clothing for their stay. He watched Arlo roll around the bed, before the child stared up at the ceiling.
"Hey, hey, sir. I'm not dreaming, right?"
Kaden raised his eyebrows in amusement. "Do I look like an illusion to you?"
Arlo laughed loudly, flipping to his side as he squinted joyously at the adult sitting on the opposite bed, a deep gratitude that even Kaden didn't recognize.
Really, it felt like a dream. And if it was, the boy wouldn't have minded never waking up again. He was scared that one day he'd open his eyes and meet the breaking floors of that old house, and feel the throbbing pain of bruises along his arms again.
Even if he had to stake everything, he never wanted to go back to that time. Drinking rainwater to comfort his dry throat, eating the leftovers of half-eaten fruit.
More importantly, thought the child quietly despite his bright smile, he didn't want to leave this man—his saviour's side.
When he'd seen Kaden, cloaked in shadows during the dead night, with his father's limp corpse leaning against him, Arlo hadn't felt fear or terror. No, he'd stared as if he saw an angel, a sight engraved into his young eyes.
It was as if a hand pulled him out of the murky swamps he wandered in, cleaning him up and giving him warm food.
An indescribable sensation.
Of course, Arlo wasn't foolish enough to believe Kaden would never abandon him. Or that he had been saved without reason.
But he was willing—willing to become somebody Kaden couldn't abandon.
And he would do whatever it took. The boy, young but not innocent, made a silent resolution to himself.
Kaden's eyes flickered over. "Done dreaming? What would you like to do?"
Arlo beamed. "I want to explore the streets! This is the capital, right? Isn't it filled with the most big and beautiful things?"
"Well, there are certainly beautiful things."
"Let's go find them!"
Kaden chuckled lightly at the brimming excitement of the child and nodded. He paused slightly when Arlo reached out to grab his hand, before feeling the leather around his fingers and relaxing.
They strolled down the busy streets again, without any incidents this time.
Arlo tugged Kaden over to a wood carver, a curly, black-haired woman who sat with her legs crossed, chipping away at a wood slab. She smiled at the pair politely.
"Are you looking to purchase anything?" Her voice was airy and soothing.
Arlo pursed his lips. "Nope! I have no money!"
Kaden laughed, turning his attention to the woman who smiled patiently. Often, hearing that a customer had no money, the seller would grow bitter or irritated. However the woman continued to chip away at the jade.
"Is that so?" she hummed. "It's of no charge to watch me, if you please. I don't mind an audience."
"What sort of things do you sell?" asked Kaden instead.
The woman glanced up at the man, her brown eyes almost amber in the sunlight. "The various carvings laid before you." She stretched her hands to gesture at a neat presentation on the cloth. "Or a symbol that fits you."
"A symbol?"
"It's only a little hobby of mine—but I've dabbled in divination and fortune telling. I can't do much, but I can carve you a symbol that will represent your future."
Kaden regarded it, and saw the interest in Arlo's wide stare. "How much is it?"
The hand carving the wood paused, as if she hadn't expected him to purchase that service. "I'm afraid I'm not the most accurate, so I'll only charge 10 coppers."
He chuckled, a languid tilt to his gaze. "10 coppers for a scam?"
"I have pride in my craft. 10 coppers is nothing compared to the quality of the wood, and my skill, even if it's a false divination. Now, don't you dear nobles find enjoyment in trivial pursuits such as these?"
There was a cheeky glint in her dazzling stare, and Kaden shook his head slowly, placing 20 copper onto the table. "I'll buy 2 services. But don't be mistaken, Miss, I am not noble."
"I've seen many carry themselves in the same way you do—you can't lie to me that easily, Sir."
She spread her slender arms wide, covered in inked patterns that swiveled around and over. Catching his stare, she smiled pleasantly. "Don't you know it's rude to stare at a woman so fervently?"
"Then I'll apologize for my straying eyes."
"Well, no need for that. I came across a seller carving ink into delicate skin by chance, and surrendered to the impulse, that's all."
"Aren't you speaking pretty casually compared to the beginning?"
"I've determined that politeness is wasted on you, Sir."
Kaden smiled at her words. "I wondered for a moment if it may be a curse."
"A curse?"
"They can appear on the skin in markings such as those, depending. Curses have various ways of forming."
"How ominous." Her laugh was an unrestrained, musical one. "I'd sure hope that I haven't been tricked into cursing myself, though I suppose there's nothing to do if that were the case."
The man paused, a darkness swirling over his fine features. "Can you speak so nonchalantly about a curse?"
"Life is hell. We're all waiting to die one day—do I have time to be worrying about 'what if'? Look at me, sir not-noble, what have I to lose other than myself?"
Her airy voice dropped an octave lower, carrying the heavy weight of her struggles, all she'd done to survive this moment. Kaden wondered if murder was counted to that weight, or thievery and trickery.
The woman lifted her beautiful gaze to observe the man's expression, waiting for disdain or disgust at her origins. But only pride revealed in her smile.
Here she sat, scarred and lovely, selling handcraft on the street.
Here she sat, in ratted clothes that revealed her inked arms, and hair tangled around thin shoulders.
And here she would remain, without the slightest bit of shame.
Kaden lowered his solemn gaze at her from where he stood, staring down at her from above as if he were something greater, more noble. With a sudden curve of his lips, he fell to the ground and sat down crossed-legged.
The him of the past would've screeched in his head to sit properly, with the elegance beaten into his back lest he return to the slums for his mistake.
But to hell with the past.
Here he sat, relaxed and messy, with rugged and unwashed pink hair and pale green eyes that were often deemed cursed and frightening.
He raised his chin with the arrogance of a prideful human, with nothing to stand for but himself. For a moment, he abandoned the years of learning and training, reverting back to that child who survived on the streets for so long.
"Aren't you going to start carving, Miss? I've paid you, after all."
She lifted her chin slightly, mimicking his appearance, recognizing somebody who lived the same wretched life as her. "Why, now this attitude, suits you well."
"Thank you for the praise."
Another laugh escaped her, before she scooped up the copper with two fingers, tucking it into a pouch. Then, her fingers floated in the air, grabbing two chunks of wood.
She sighed softly. "A pity that I can only afford cheap cuts of wood." Raising it to the light, she traced a nail over the grain, feeling the firmness.
Kaden gestured for Arlo to sit down beside him, ignoring the odd glances from passersby. Without turning his head, he wondered, "You don't want to make some proclamation on how the imperfect holds beauty?"
"It's a natural fact that somebody in my craft would love to work with good-quality materials." scoffed the woman, pulling out her tools. "A soft wood that holds detail... unfortunately, I can only afford the cheapest kind."
After lamenting on her poor fortune, she raised a finger to her lips. "Now, remain a pretty statue while I focus, please."
She peered curiously at Kaden, her eyes like a feline's careful stare that prodded deep inside. He felt bare, and exposed in mere seconds but unable to move from the spot he stood frozen.
She grabbed the rough wood slab, flicking her knife without looking down, fingers dancing across the brown surface to chip and shine at the rough edges.
Kane glanced down, mesmerized with her work. As if she were possessed, the sunlight made her amber eyes gleam.
The crowd continued to walk past as if nothing was happening—and he wondered, how could people feel such indifference when he was lost in wonder at the flurry of her precise movements, both delicate yet fast.
He realized how insignificant things were at that second.
'I am insignificant, and therefore my significance to others does not matter.'
A strange calm settled over him at that thought, distracted as the soft breeze brushed more wandering ideas into his head.
The woman, still quietly watching as she pieced the man's fortune into a single representation, carved into wood, smiled lightly. How odd, she thought softly, that a person with such a noble and grand fate would feel at peace with the simplicity of everyday.
As a person selling work on the streets, she was neither too poor nor too rich, making enough for her survival and her family's.
Her hands were scarred and blistered, unsightly for a woman seeking future prospects, but she paid no mind to it. How could she think of an unknown love, when her beloved family needed food on the table?
She'd seen all sorts of people, the poor and the noble, the middle class.
But she didn't think she'd mind anybody who got dazed while waiting for her carvings, his green eyes reflecting speckles of the sky's blue, staring as if the canvas above were some impossible treasure.
"Sir, I've finished the carving."
Kaden blinked once, then twice, coming back to his senses as a smile played at his lips habitually.
However, his lips parted in surprise.
A pair of spread wings, with jagged and sharp edges greeted him. Attached to nothing, but stretched wide and free as if alive, ready to soar through the clouds and beyond. It was similar to a bat's wings, yet more delicate and beautiful in a way words could not describe.
If he had to put a word to it, he would name it similar to the brilliant displays he saw painted on paper.
A dragon's wings.
A puff of laughter left Kaden's surprised mouth, before he tossed his head back and laughed in a wild, unrestrained way, catching the eyes of several people.
He bent at his stomach, laughing loudly as his pale pink strands fell over his amused eyes, a charming rumble to the sound. How amusing! He wanted to shout, the ridiculous laughter continuing, almost forced.
Wings—for a second he'd almost thought of freedom!
His laughter died away, and he wrapped a slender hand around the woman's detailed and beautiful carving, around the pair of dragon wing's that opened against his palm.
"My future, was it?" he spoke in a half-whisper, lowering his gaze.
Wasn't this just proof that ultimately, by the end of things, nothing would change? That it was Noah Bellamy who would rule over justice, and send him to redemption?
And in the end, even if he changed everything about the accursed world, his fate and future was already set in stone.
The woman watched the obscure and abrupt movements of the noble before her with a frown. She couldn't determine the emotions behind his reaction. "Might I remind you, my skills are rather poor—"
"No, no. Your skills are excellent." Kaden raised his palm to his lips, pressing a fleeting kiss against the wings. "He is the future I've always been expecting."
"...I mean no disrespect, but are you certain?"
"What do you mean?" He raised his head to stare at her.
"Let's say, fine, he is the future you've always been expecting. The 'he' which I do not know, nor need to—what if the shape he's meant to take in your future is unlike what you expect?"
Kaden shook his head calmly. "No, there are things that cannot change. He will be my saviour, my judge and salvation."
"Forgive me if I'm wrong, but Sir, you cannot envision happiness in your future, can you?" said the woman, observing the mocking curve of his lips and the dullness that had greyed his earlier expression. "You believe that person will damn you."
Arlo listened quietly, and tugged on Kaden's sleeve. "...mister, are you going to die in the future?"
"I'm not going to die."
The woman scoffed rudely. "It certainly sounds like you intend to, wording things the way you do."
No, Kaden wasn't entirely brainless despite his ridiculous pessimism that would have Niklas scolding him for days. In his past life, Kaden's exile had been necessary considering his deeds.
But now that Noah and he formed an interpersonal relationship, far beyond the simple role of classmates in the past, the dragon wouldn't be able to do it.
He wouldn't be able to damn Kaden to eternal solitude.
However, Kaden was still bound by the curse of obedience, and ultimately the weight of murder would continue to grow. A punishment was inevitable.
And if it meant death, he would welcome it with open arms. He just didn't think Noah would kill him—a hero didn't murder recklessly. And the reluctance in Noah's heavy arms that swung his sword endlessly didn't show an eagerness for battle.
In him observing Noah, he'd learned more about the dragon than any other person. He had a feeling that the two of them, at their cores, both wanted the same thing.
Nevertheless, he would betray Noah's trust one day.
And the judge for his crimes would be Noah, and only he.
Kaden didn't really care about death or punishment, or whatever cruel judgment Noah could give to him. But the idea of those relaxed onyx eyes turning cold with livid disgust made his heart sink to his stomach.
His thoughts were forever a conflicted mess. Noah's name bound him by chains to his future destiny, but Noah also represented a freedom he couldn't understand. In the end, that man would always stand on the opposing side.
That was why he'd thought it to be so ridiculous to see the carved wings.
"I do look forward to the future." smiled Kaden, turning the wings over and hiding it securely in his pocket.
The woman pursed her plump lips, cocking her head slightly as her curls tumbled with her movement. "I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing, honestly."
"I wouldn't know either, unfortunately."
But as their tale continued to weave itself into the ever moving passage of time, he could only look ahead. Or the past would consume him entirely.
The tragedy of what had once been, or the possible happiness of the unknown.
Really, everything was entirely uncertain. It made him worried, and honestly rather exhausted thinking of everything he'd have to account for. In a way, it almost felt like everything was against him, wrapped with uncertainty. Everything except—
His hands felt into his pocket, past the golden coin that he always carried around, to the wooden grooves and sharp edges of the carving.
—except for that dragon.