How to Make a Sinner Sleep - Chapter 51: Chapter 51

A walk in the dark was terrifying in the way that anything could watch from the shadows, slipping in between creaks of trees and the rustle of animals. It was scary how vulnerable a person became; prey to whatever roamed the night.
Conversely, the feeling of solitude blanketing over like a gust of cold wind after walking in the scorching sunlight was addicting. The way it was just a person and the moonlight, and whatever strangeness lurked in the shadows in harmony.
Taking a walk outside of a haunted cabin—Kaden wasn't sure if that was stupidity or brilliance, though he doubted whether there really were ghosts to begin with.
He lit a candle light, lifting it up as he wrapped a jacket around his body.
His steps were light, naturally weaving between the places among the boards that would make the least sound. A habit learned, necessary for his survival in his youth. He was brought back to his past, the days as a thief sneaking by.
When he first entered the palace, he'd also sneaked into the kitchen after being too scared to eat the food that had been brought to him.
It was reasonable; he'd once been given bread by a noble's child, only to have maggots crawl out of the festering green inside the bread. He'd thrown it in terror while the children laughed at his miserable state.
As the young boy, cleaned but still filthy at heart, climbed the counters to rummage through for food, the door had creaked open.
Kaden had launched himself into hiding, curling in the corners.
Reed stood, holding up a candlelight that warmed his tender features, as he glanced around the room. The prince hadn't said anything, softly walking inside as he pulled out two plates and some bread and jam.
Kaden watched cautiously from the corner as Reed spread the jam over both pieces of bread, and then crouched down beside a wall. He placed a plate down at his side.
The prince had then taken a large, unsightly bite out of the bread. He gobbled it up with enthusiasm, indifferent to the red jam coating his fingers in a mess.
It was this sight that had prompted Kaden to peek out of his hiding spot, slowly creeping closer. Reed kept his sights evenly on the bread, but his eyes had darted sideways with amusement as Kaden snatched up the bread and ate it quickly.
The careful boy swallowed the bread as if it could get stolen back at any moment. Reed waited, and then asked, "Still hungry?"
Kaden had still been distrustful of the noble looking teenager, but his stomach rumbled—and he decided, if he was keeping a good eye on the teenager when he made food, then maybe it was okay to take his food.
Just a little bit.
Late at night, in the darkness of the royal family's kitchen, one teenager and one child sat on the ground beside each other.
Kaden stopped by the windows along the hallway of the house, curtains parted wide to reveal the forest outside, and the hum of birds floating along the night's breeze. He saw his reflection, and gloom filled his gaze.
Who would've expected, that the first person the cautious little boy decided to trust would become his downfall?
Kaden turned away, not wanting to continue looking at even a shadow of himself when something flickered in his gaze. A flutter of white in the corner of his eye. He spun his head around, frowning.
Nothing was there.
Was he tired enough to see hallucinations, or was his blessing toying with his mind again? Then, he heard the sweet whispers of a woman's voice behind him, and he turned again.
Nothing but the floorboards that creaked and echoed faraway, and the wind that rustled the hinges of the old doors. The branches that scraped the window and the howling of creatures deep in the night.
Kaden stared, and then headed in the direction of the woman's whispers, close enough to feel the breath in his ear. A baby wailed at the windows clattered in the wind, but there was no child, and the house was in the middle of nowhere.
Kaden felt goosebumps line his arms as he continued forth, raising the candle that flickered with its orange hue.
His delusions were far more frightening than any ghost, and he felt a prick of curiosity instead. To think he could experience seeing a ghost in this lifetime—how could that not be fascinating?
To begin with, if he was really being haunted, then there was nothing to do. Running would only encourage the strange spirits to haunt him more.
Then he heard it, the low creaking around the corner by the staircase.
Everybody else should've long gone to sleep, right? If not, then he watched everyone enter their rooms earlier, and if they left, he would've encountered them already.
Kaden swallowed, his nerves prickling on his skin and anticipation heavy in the air. His steps slowed, quiet and sneaking, and he considered blowing out the candle before deciding that if he were to be murdered by a ghost, he chose to do so in the light.
Then he squinted at the candle. Actually, what if it fell to the ground and set the old house on fire... would he accidentally murder all his friends with him?
Instead of feeling fear, he felt worry about the great dilemma.
To blow out the flames, or keep it going?
Distracted, he didn't realize he already reached the corner as he decisively blew out the flames. As soon as he did, a pair of sturdy hands grabbed him by the shoulder, defined fingers digging into his flesh with shock.
Kaden let out a soft yelp of surprise, though still hushed and muffled, only heard by the thing in front of him.
The hands let go immediately, and Kaden heard the strike of a match as the candle flickered back to life, illuminating Noah's stern face that was probably scarier than any ghost he could've encountered.
Kaden blinked rapidly, calming himself from the shock and stared wistfully past Noah as if debating how to run away.
The door was calling to him, and he felt compelled to answer.
The dragon gazed at him, glancing sideways at the escape path, and wondered if he shouldn't have let go of the fleeing man. He'd only grabbed Kaden because he thought the person would fall, or stumble over the candle.
Noah's voice was low, melded with the night. "You're awake?"
There was a hint of scolding in the tone, reprimanding Kaden for staying awake when the dark circles under his eyes couldn't get any darker.
The dragon felt more and more irritated as he stared at the fool who was still debating how to escape. The paleness of Kaden's skin that painted him with a sickly demure, appearing as if he'd barely eaten in days.
Knowing Kaden's escape from the cafeteria recently, and his lack of memory to eat regular meals otherwise, it was likely.
Tsk. After all the effort he took to feed and take care of that fool, wasted by his bad habits. Noah quietly decided to put an end of the cold air between them, and stuff Kaden with food and sleep. Whatever minimum Kaden was surviving on could hardly be enough.
Noah could imagine it well, several hours of uneven sleep, leaving one exhausted and ill. Nibbles of food to sustain a grumbling stomach, keeping one connected to life by a thinning thread.
Kaden swung his head up, feeling as if Noah's gaze had turned odd and increasingly angry.
Was he about to be beaten up?
Noah turned and Kaden flinched defensively, earning a hard look from the dragon. He smiled sheepishly. "Well, Bellamy, is this our nightly rendezvous?"
Noah stared, and then turned to the stairs. "If you don't follow me, I'll throw you over my shoulder and bring you myself."
The idea horrified Kaden who hurried to trail beside Noah. "I'm coming, I'm coming, of course I would follow you to even the most dreadful of places, my dearest dragon." rambled the man as Noah turned again and entered the kitchen.
"Welcome to the most dreadful of places, Chauvet." deadpanned Noah.
Kaden felt at a loss, even when Noah directed him to sit in a chair and to stay put, smothering any ideas of escaping. He felt a wave of dizziness, which made it easy for the dragon to direct and move him.
When Kaden moved to stand, he was silenced by a deadly glare.
He sat obediently, legs together and hands on his lap in a daze. He watched as Noah moved around the kitchen, gathering an assortment of ingredients. Soon, he realized that Noah was fixing a sandwich made of salami and cheese.
"Crust on or off?" said the dragon, staring squarely at Kaden.
Kaden was still confused and said slowly, "On?"
Noah nodded and moved around, slathering some sort of sauce of the bread and then slicing it diagonally to make two equal triangle pieces. He found a plate in the cabinets, and placed it in front of Kaden.
"Eat." It was more of an order than a request. "You haven't eaten today, have you?"
"Ah..." Thinking back, he really didn't eat anything. That explained his dizziness that was worse than usual, even if he wasn't sleeping well. He scratched his chin and bent down to eat the sandwich.
The taste spread through his mouth, and he almost melted in its flavour. Really, it was nothing special, just meat and cheese pressed between white bread.
And yet it tasted heavenly; he'd never tasted anything better.
"The secret ingredient's love, isn't it?" laughed Kaden jokingly after he finished half, curbing his rumbling stomach that didn't realize it was starved until just now.
"It's poison."
"I heard only the most obsessive romances end with poison. I'll make something for you some time."
Noah arched a brow, pulling a seat beside Kaden. "I'm assuming it'll be laced with poison as well?"
"A show of affection, as you do."
Then, Kaden stopped him and picked up the plate, stalking over to the kitchen counter. He slumped onto the ground, feeling the wood creak underneath, and continued eating. Noah didn't hesitate to follow, sitting beside him on the ground.
It was a giddy feeling, with the glimpse of moonlight spilling over the counters, where they sat in the shadows obscured. Sneaking food at the middle of the night.
Kaden continued eating and his eyes curved with delight.
His original memories of sneaking food in the kitchen had become gloomy, knowing what became of him and Reed. However, now, those gloomy memories were overwritten by the prominent presence of the dragon.
Noah brought one knee up, leaning against his palm as he watched Kaden eat with the same vigour and happiness of a starved child on the streets.
Really... he couldn't understand this man.
Kaden licked the crumbs off his lips, patting his satiated stomach. He almost wanted to ask for another, knowing Noah would likely give it, but decided that it was enough. After starving, one shouldn't suddenly over stuff themselves with food.
Kaden sighed with satisfaction, leaning against his knee as he turned his head to Noah, cheek pressed over his leg as he smiled. "Bellamy, I think there's a problem. I don't know if I'll be able to live without you anymore."
Noah tilted his head. "I don't intend for you to."
Kaden laughed at that, the solemness of the other's voice. "Tell me, didn't you hate me? Maybe not now, I'm not that self-loathing, but before?"
"Not once have I hated you, Kaden Chauvet."
Kaden swallowed, jerking at the confession, the steady black gaze that didn't look away. He felt himself sinking into the abyss of Noah's eyes, moonlight scattered across the black like stars over the night sky.
"...you're lying. Even I can tell when somebody's irritated with me."
"Irritated, always." agreed Noah, and some mirth spilled into his gaze. "You annoy me in how you lack self-awareness and the ability to eat and sleep, constantly getting into danger without a care for yourself. You irritate me in how you pretend to be somebody your not, playing the cold and mad man as the rumours say, when you're anything but."
Noah paused, and in a low mutter that Kaden couldn't hear, said, "And you irritate me in the way you refuse to see me for anything but a hero."
Kaden ducked his head, leaning closer. "Sorry, say that again?"
"If you aren't listening, then I won't repeat it."
"I'm listening, I'm always listening. I really didn't hear it, I'm sorry, please? One more time? You spoke too quietly, I swear I hang off every word you speak from your eloquent mouth!"
Noah felt little amused by Kaden's pleading, although he already knew it. Even if Kaden had an idolized vision of him, it was also Kaden who was always listening.
Whenever Noah turned his head, he would remember that there was somebody there, and that he wasn't alone. There was something addicting in knowing that. His heavy gaze dropped, to Kaden's wet lips licked out of nervousness.
Kaden, always so confident, always so nervous around Noah. The dragon supposed, to begin with, Kaden was awkward around those he liked. He didn't know how to behave, too used to making sarcastic comments and cruel threats.
Noah had put a name to the brewing feelings. He wasn't dense, nor would he deny what simmered in his heart.
Nevertheless, it wasn't the right time.
He wouldn't give his heart to a person unwilling to give theirs back.
Kaden had secrets to hide, and Noah respected that. But as long as Kaden was unwilling to give all of himself, tucking away his personality and thoughts far away, playing a character that he wasn't, Noah couldn't do anything.
He wrenched his gaze away from the fool, closing his eyes and leaning back against the counter. Kaden mistakenly thought he was mad.
"I meant it, Bellamy. Whatever you say, just as your writing, I'll want to hear it."
Noah's eyes fluttered open, dark lashes sweeping over his cheeks as he tilted his head back, rolling it slightly to look at Kaden. "I believe you."
Kaden broke out into a smile. "Do you? What a relief."
He'd been anxious in how to get along with Noah again, and seeing Noah's relaxed appearance that wasn't avoiding him, Kaden felt a rush of joy.
Then, a baby cried again from outside this time. It's wails twisted with the breeze, shaking the doors and the walls. Kaden's ears perked, and he eagerly looked up to the dragon who closed his eyes tiredly.
"Bellamy. What would you say to an adventure?"
Noah cracked an eye open lazily. "You want to follow the cries?"
"You know me so well, what would I do without you to read my thoughts?" smiled Kaden, rising to his feet. He reached out and grabbed Noah's wrist—it was the first time he reached out of his own accord.
But Kaden was too excited about ghost-finding to realize Noah's deep gaze where hand and wrist connected.
"Hurry, we can't miss it. Perhaps we'll unravel some ancient mystery."
Noah allowed himself to be pulled and rushed outside. "Has Niklas influenced you in some way?"
"That's a horrible insult. Believe it or not, I'm very fascinated with most things."
How could Noah not believe it, when he'd seen Kaden stroll the festival like a child that'd never seen the lights glowing at night, never heard the liveliness of a crowd? Noah saw the anxiety Kaden had for this very trip, his worries seeping out.
Once again, in a quiet voice, he said, "I believe it."