Husband In The Shadows - Chapter 18: Chapter 18

Nydia gripped the steering wheel so tight that her knuckles turned white. "It's not about money. I'd never leave you with nothing.
"What I can't take is you not even letting me explain. You've already made up your mind about everything, and now you just want to cut all ties like I never mattered."
I frowned, not saying a word.
I didn't know what she was trying to get at.
For Nydia, this was probably as close as she could get to being emotional.
For a second, it felt like I was looking at someone else.
Was this really the same woman who chased Jefferson for years?
Didn't she become a doctor because of him?
Now that I'd stopped begging and finally agreed to let her go, shouldn't she be running to Jefferson?
Why would she say all this now when it was already too late?
After all, I'd filed for divorce. We'd been to court. It was already halfway over.
She caught my silence, and a barely noticeable smirk flickered across her face.
She said softly, "I read the court papers again and again.
"You still think I'm in love with Jefferson, huh?"
I didn't answer, but my face said enough.
There was guilt written all over Nydia's face. She bit her lip and said quietly, her tone filled with regret, "I'm sorry, Emerson. I really am.
"I should've cleared things up a long time ago. I know I hurt you."
The apology came out of nowhere. I didn't know whether to laugh, be shocked, or just roll my eyes.
"Apologies don't fix everything. Otherwise, we wouldn't be here," I said flatly.
Nydia had no comeback.
I continued, "If you know you were wrong, then sign the papers. Let's end this fast. After that, we'll both move on."
I looked at her with a half-smile. "Who knows? If you stop dragging it out, maybe I'll even forgive you faster."
Nydia's face dropped. Her voice was low and shaky. "Do you really have to talk to me like this? Do you have to be so heartless?"
I answered lazily, "How else should I talk?"
Those past two weeks had changed a lot. I had let it go, and I wasn't going to stand in front of her with my head down anymore.
She whispered, "Emerson, I don't want to lose you. I don't want a divorce."
I cut in right away, "What you really mean is you don't want to lose someone who's always loved you, right?"
Panicked, Nydia stepped on the gas. The car lurched forward.
I grabbed the seatbelt. "Slow down. I'm not trying to die in a car crash."
She took a deep breath, eyes red. "You're not just someone who loves me. You never were.
"Maybe I messed up, maybe I made you misunderstand, but I really want to keep this marriage."
I stared at her, wondering if she'd completely lost it. She didn't sound like the same person at all.
The cold, distant Nydia I'd known for years was suddenly gone.
"Emerson, please don't leave me," she pleaded.
I let out a short breath and gave her a cold look. "I spent four years trying to help you move on from Jefferson. You didn't budge an inch. That's how I know this marriage was doomed from the start.
"Maybe I was too soft. I thought if I loved you enough, you'd eventually see me. But I was wrong.
"You forgot every single anniversary because of Jefferson. When I was in the hospital, you sat by his bed, not mine. People thought he was your boyfriend.
"You never showed me care or respect, not even a little.
"Now you've helped him get divorced. You two clearly care about each other. Why not just be together already?
"Just don't drag me into this mess anymore."