I still remember. Do You? ꒰ა yoonmi... - Chapter 57: Chapter 57

The cold wind strikes Jimin's flushed face, making him shudder but he isn't that affected by the cold today. There's a fire burning inside of him that's keeping him warm.
Yoongi walks close to him, but doesn't dare to say anything. Jimin can sense the nervousness in Yoongi's body from his scent but he hesitate in striking a conversation too.
He stops in the middle suddenly, making Yoongi stop in his track too.
Yoongi looks at Jimin but the omega isn't looking back at him, instead his gaze is on the stream of river that reflects the moonlight on its surface.
" Hyung..."
Jimin calls for him and it melts Yoongi's heart. Oh, how much he missed Jimin calling him like that. He remembers the progress of their relationship; it started from Yoongi ssi, to hyung, to love to Mr. Min to Yoongi and now finally back to hyung.
Yoongi can't explain how much happy a single word from Jimin can make him. Only Jimin has that much power over him.
" I want to hear your side of the story."
Jimin looks up, his facial expressions are tight but Yoongi can figure out that he's not mad.
Yoongi cracks a smile at that. He knows, in a situation like this Jimin could have chose to blame him too, but instead he wants to know his side of the story. And it assures Yoongi about their relationship and their future. He can see the trust Jimin has in him.
Yoongi put his hand in front of him and Jimin looks at it in a confused manner. That's not what he asked for.
" My hand is cold."
Jimin thinks for some second before giving up and putting his hand on top of Yoongi. A strange coolness spread all over his body at the touch that's extinguishing the rage inside him.
Even Yoongi feels much relaxed after holding Jimin's hand. He did so, so the omega won't run away from him while he tells him his side of the story. He knows it's not going to be easy for them.
Yoongi starts to take slow steps forward and Jimin matched his footsteps. They kept walking like that for some seconds, letting the cold wind welcome them before Yoongi started telling his story.
" Your dad never liked me."
" Whenever you were there he acted normal with me but as soon as you were gone he treated me like an outcast."
Yoongi remembers the hurtful words Jimin's father had said to him. From being a middle class person to just being a gold digger who's after Jimin for his money. Yoongi had heard all these insults but still didn't say anything because he thought maybe he could change Jihoon's thinking with time. Oh, how wrong he was to think that.
" Why didn't you tell me? "
Jimin feels ashamed of himself for not noticing it before. How ignorant was he to see how his father treated Yoongi. If only he had seen it or Yoongi had told him about it, his life would have been so different now.
The hatred for his father only continues to grows in his heart.
" Would you have believed me? "
Yoongi asks and Jimin stops his feet from going any more further. His silence is the answer that Yoongi needed. He has already known that Jimin wouldn't have believed him, a person who he has known for a few years over his father who's been there for him since he opened his eyes in this world.
" And even if you did, I didn't want to ruin your bond with your father. I knew how much you loved him."
Jimin became silent on hearing that. Yoongi, an outsider who cared so much about his family. And then there's his father who was his only family but still acted so selfishly.
" But it was all bearable, because I thought he'd accept me once our child was born but then -"
How could he forget that day. The day happiness faded away from his life, the day he knew he couldn't be together with his Jimin anymore.
" You remember the day you got the scholarship letter ? "
Jimin nods weakly at that, he remembers running to his father with the letter in his hand. Even though his father could have easily paid for his admission fees, Jimin wanted to show him that he can get to his dream university all by himself too. So, he studied hard and was finally able to get a scholarship there. But it was a really wrong timing.
" He called me to his room that night and threw the letter right at me."
The letter didn't hurt him but the harsh words Jimin's father said to him were the one that hurt him the most. He still remember his words line by line because it's hard to forget the bad memories.
" Telling me how I was the reason that you couldn't follow your dreams anymore-"
" - that instead of being in your dream university you were now stuck with me and my child."
" That it would have been better if I never got involved with you. You would have lived a better life without me."
Yoongi was already upset that Jimin didn't get to go to his dream university. But when Jihoon started blaming everything on him, even he started to think that he was right. Maybe he was the real problem here.
" And you believed him? "
Jimin looked at Yoongi with disbelief in his eyes. Yoongi can see the betrayal glinting in them.
Yoongi looked away not being able to take it anymore.
" Yes, I did. Because what he said was true."
Atleast that's what his brain has made him believe for years now.
" You talked about that university twenty four seven, Jimin. It was your biggest dream and you were so close to it... So close."
The way Jimin talked about it, Yoongi had became attached to Jimin's dream too. He loved Jimin with all his heart so, he wanted Jimin to excel in his life and fulfill his dreams.
But his love became one of the reason that Jimin wasn't able to fulfill his dreams, it became the reason for Jimin to abandon them and he.... he never wanted that.
" I felt like I bounded you down, that I cut off your wings and stopped you from flying high... That I took away your happiness from you."
Jimin didn't even show a single sign of sadness when his scholarship letter came and it broke Yoongi from inside. He knew Jimin was doing that purposely so, Yoongi wouldn't feel bad. But putting that act of everything being fine only made Yoongi feel worse.
" But my happiness was you."
Jimin says it with so much love and pureness that Yoongi starts to tear up. If only he got to hear it from Jimin before, they wouldn't be here like this. If only at that time someone reassured him that Jimin was happy with him he would have never taken such a drastic step.
" After that the hateness in your father's heart only grew for me. And as he saw you suffering he came up to me with an offer."
He continues with his story. He needs to take it all off his chest before he could look at Jimin again.
" An offer to take our child and leave silently from your life."
Yoongi was so mad when this offered was made, in his rage he even screamed at Jimin's father. Telling him what a bad parent he was to even think about doing something like this to his son. But Jihoon didn't even flinch to his insults, it's like he had made his mind and he would have Yoongi leave one way or the other.
" I didn't want to take it, separating from you was the last thing I would have wanted."
He would have choose to rather die than be alive without his lover.
" But then he told me how you would have wished the same too, to have me and our child disappeared from your life."
" That you'd want a partner who would be able to fulfill all your wishes, not someone who doesn't even have a home of his own."
He laughed at his own misery, if only he belonged to a rich family like Jimin's maybe Jihoon wouldn't have hated him at the first place. Then maybe things wouldn't have come so far.
" And I started to believe him. I started to believe that I wasn't the perfect person for you. That you deserved better than me. You deserved only the best in the world and that was something I couldn't have given you back then."
All he had that time was a tiny crapped apartment and an office job that was paying him just enough to reach the bare minimums. He wouldn't have been able to fulfill any of Jimin's need with it.
" You belonged to those big mansions and rich parties while I belonged to a small apartment and a manageable job."
" We were two parallel lines who were never supposed to meet each other. But we did and i- I ruined your life."
He sometimes thinks if it would have been better if he and Jimin never met, if he never accepted the proposal, of he have never gone on that first date with him.
But if that happened he would have never got to meet his son. He would have never experienced those happy moments that he had with Jimin, he would have never experienced what a true love was.
He would rather experience the pain everytime than to never have those happy moments.
" That's what you think."
When Yoongi was done speaking his mind, Jimin knew it was his turn to do so. He wants to tell him his feelings, his feelings that Yoongi didn't see before.
" Have you ever considered my thoughts about it? "
Yoongi shook his head at that, ashamed at himself.
" I never wanted those big ass houses and lavish party to be happy, all I wanted was-- someone to love me. Someone who would care for me and someone who would treat me like I'm everything they ever needed."
He only attended those parties because his father asked him to, in reality he would rather sleep at his home or study at a library than going there.
After his papa left, there was only one thing that was missing from his life and it was the feeling of pure love and care. And he got to experience it once again with Yoongi. He saw him as an angel that his papa has sent for him to take care of him.
" And your love made me feel all those things."
To him the money didn't matter, he has learnt that message when he saw his papa die. Even the money wasn't able to save him. That was the day little Jimin understood that money can never equal love.
" But I think my love wasn't strong enough. That you doubted it."
He's hurt that yoongi didn't even consider asking him his feelings or told him what he was going through. It makes him feel like Yoongi didn't think of his love as something that was strong and firm. Was it his fault for not showing Yoongi how much he loved him?
" No Jimin i-"
" If you didn't, then you would have came to me that very moment my father said those words to you."
His tone is calm but the speck of anger can be easily felt. It's there to show Yoongi the consequences of his action and how it took a toll on Jimin.
" I would have fighted him together with you."
If Yoongi told him, there was no way he wouldn't have believed him. Maybe he would have not at first, but he'd eventually see the truth in his eyes. And once he saw that, he would have interwined their hands together and fought with his father just like today.
" All I wanted was a happy life together with you and our child but- you thought I only wanted money and expensive things."
His life completely changed after Yoonjun came. He stopped his unhealthy lifestyle and started taking more care of himself because of his child. Because he wanted his child to be healthy.
" I know I always dreamed about going to that university but dreams can change too- and mine did when our baby entered my life."
Even though he didn't get the chance to go to his dream university , he was strangely not much affected by it. Maybe it was because the happiness of welcoming his and Yoongi's child was more than the sadness of not going to the university.
" I wanted to be a good parent. I wanted to build a happy family with you."
He dreamt about having a happy family of his own. Where he and Yoongi would love their child just like his papa and dad loved him.
" The university could have waited but not my family."
It was his own decision to give up the scholarship, it was his own decision to have this child. But he doesn't understand why the decision of taking his child away was made without his knowing. It was the most crucial decision of his life, yet no one thought of asking him about it first.
" Jimin i-"
" You should have trusted me yoongi. You should h-have trusted my l-love."
His breaths are getting shaky, his heart is broken again. It hurts so much more after people closest to you are the reason of your heartbreak.
" But you didn't and it...it hurts me. It hurts me so much."
" You took my life decisions without consulting me."
" You took my CHILD away. The child that I've loved from the very first moment it entered my life. My baby, my Y-yoonjun."
Calling Yoonjun'a name feel different now. It hurts his chest but in a good kinda way. Just thinking about how he imagined to give this name to his child to it really being a reality is something surreal, but to think that he wasn't allowed to be a part of it-- it is so frustrating.
" I lived my life in regret for not being able to protect my child. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURTS ?"
Of course, Yoongi doesn't. In his head the alpha started to believe Jihoon and imagined Jimin to be relieved after he and Yoonjun went away from his life. If he knew Jimin was in so much pain because of him he would have came right back to him.
" But what hurts me the most that we could have avoided it all... If only you trusted me."
" I'm sorry, Jimin. I'm so sorry."
It's his fault. He won't make any excuse. He could have avoided it all by trusting Jimin and telling everything to him. But he choose to believe to Jihoon's manipulating words instead of believing Jimin's love.
" I never wanted to do this- but I thought it was the best for you and our child."
He had to take this step for their son. He was afraid what Jihoon might do to their son otherwise. Jimin would want their child to be safe, that's what Yoongi thought as he rushed out of the hospital that day with the newborn clutched in his hands, dear to his chest.
" I even wrote a letter to you, I wrote everything in it and gave it to one of the servants in your house."
" But I guess it never made it to you."
He has left his new number in there so Jimin could contact him if he forgive him for his doing but when Jimin didn't, Yoongi thought the omega was mad at him or either his letter never made it to him.
" I tried calling you too, because I missed you so much but your father picked up and told me that you've already left for the US."
He had called Jimin's number after picking up all his courage, he couldn't go any longer without telling Jimin about their son.
But to his dismay, the call was picked by Jimin's father who gave him a plain answer that Jimin was already so far away. And it broke him so much to think that he could never get his Jimin back now.
" And believe me I was happy, I was so happy for you. That you finally got to live your dreams."
He was happy for Jimin, but what about the sadness he felt for his son who never got to see his father?
" It gave me motivation to try my best too."
He wanted to make it big to give a nice future for their son, like he has planned with Jimin. He doesn't wanted to let Jimin down.
" So, I started out my own start up like we always talked about."
" I hoped it'd be a big name so you'd notice me."
He purposely named it 'MinMin' as he and Jimin had discussed during their college days. It was a combination of both their names.
" Even though I let you go willingly I still hoped you'd come back to me. To me and our son. I wished for a day when you'd reunite with our son. But I never knew it'd come true."
He had always envisioned a moment where he would meet Jimin again and all the things he would tell him. But there meeting didn't go quite like he had planned.
He was about to say something when a car's honk interrupted him. He squints his eyes at the car's blinding headlight.
Once the headlight was turned off then only he was able to see the person sitting inside.
" Taehyung? "
He looks confused as to why the alpha was here.
" I texted him."
Jimin replies breathing out his held breath.
" I'll be staying at his house for sometime. I need some alone time to think straight."
He looks at Yoongi and Yoongi understood how desperate need is Jimin in a personal space for right now.
Because even though Yoongi didn't want to do it, he still did it and hurt Jimin. So, he deserves it.
" If that's what you want."
He says and Jimin starts to walk away, his hand getting away from Yoongi's grip and coldness taking over his body once again. They didn't realise they were holding hands for so long because it felt so comfortable.
" Wait-"
Jimin stopped on hearing that.
" Here. It's cold today. And don't skip your meals, you're already so weak."
He drapes his jacket over Jimin, not wanting the omega to catch a cold.
He walks to the car with Jimin.
He smiles at Taehyung who seems to be confused by what was going on.
" Taehyung ah, take care of Jimin please."
" Don't worry hyung, I will. "
Taehyung puts his hand on Jimin's back and starts to guide him back. Taehyung understood something was wrong but he didn't say anything sensing the tense mood.
Jimin stopped and asked Taehyung to get inside fiest. He turns around see Yoongi still standing there looking at him with a smile on his face to mask his real emotions.
" Drive safely."
He said to the alpha before following Taehyung too. Because even if he's angry at Yoongi that doesn't mean he doesn't love him anymore.
" Jimin..."
Yoongi's word gets fades away with the cold breeze. His heart seems to be frozen too. His eyes starting to water as he sees Jimin get away from him.