Morally Grey - Annie Leonhart x Reader - Chapter 8: Chapter 8

Every day you snuck away from the scouts to go see Annie; to gaze at the girl you love through several feet of unbreakable crystal.
Her face was tranquil like you've never seen before. Her soft golden hair contrasted with the blue of the stone, and it made her face pale and smooth.
For days and days you just sat on the floor, staring up at her cage in silence. Not that you really had much to say.
Not that you really could say anything with the guard constantly on the room. You did your best to talk about the weather, or whatever gruelling exercise captain Levi put you through,
During this time (semi) alone with Annie, you did a lot of thinking. Thinking about yourself: who you were at the core level, and what you promised to the world. To your family.
And then you thought about Annie. Who she was, and how she was the epitome of what you were trying to fight.
To be honest, the betrayal hurt.
But you weren't angry.
You didn't hate her.
"What's wrong with me Annie" you said to yourself one day as you were sitting on floor huddled up to her crystal. The guard had decided he could flake out on his duty that day, knowing you wouldn't do anything rash.
You had crossed the safety ropes and sat on the sticks that held up the crystal, leaning your head on the cool stone.
"I don't understand. You betrayed us. You killed my comrades on the field. You trained with us, knowing you were going to kill us. Why would you do it?" You poured your heart out to the empty room.
"You are everything I swore to destroy; everything I swore to fight against. You are the enemy."
"You are a monster"
Silence filled the room as you stopped talking; taking a moment to organize your thoughts.
"But then, what does that make me?"
"If I still love a monster, no matter what it's done?"
The whole ordeal about Annie was harder on you than it was for anyone. Not only had the two of you been the closest out of anyone, but your whole view of yourself and your future shifted with her. You promised to destroy the titans; to save humanity and liberate your people, and yet, Annie was a titan, but you still loved her with every fiber of your being, and you wanted nothing else but to protect her and keep her alive.
"God, I love you Annie" you started your speech again.
"I've loved you since training and I love you still. No matter what you've done or what you are. What's wrong with me?"
"This isn't who I'm supposed to be"
Silence hung in the room again, and you left your forehead remain on the cool crystal. This was the first time you admitted your feelings for Annie out loud. But it didn't matter.
She couldn't hear you.
. . .
The years flew by and you grew up: stronger both in physical form and mental mind, but that didn't make history hurt less.
You lost many friends and the survey corps went through many big changes. The scouts finally reached the Yeager's basement and discovered the truth about the world. You retook wall Maria.
You saw the sea, and were reminded of Annie's blue eyes, and how they haven't opened for a while.
You and your friends got to travel to Marley. Annie's home. You all revelled over everything: how modern things were and how much more inticing this life was. You enjoyed the slim bit of free time, but you couldn't help but picture Annie as a young girl, running through streets like these, eating sweets with her dad and training with these people.
You met the marleyan warriors; Annie's brothers and sisters in arms. You learned Annie would die after a certain amount of years.
More years pass, you helped build a railroad. Battled more titans. Involved in plans. Got to see your friend Eren again. Lost Sasha.
You visited Annie at every opportunity. Expressing how much you loved her. Begging her to come back to you.
Time passed, and life went on, but still you never lost sight of your lovely Annie. The girl who your heart beat for.
Your soulmate.