My Princessa - Chapter 68: Chapter 68

Hey there...
It's been a whole year since my last letter. You won't believe where I am right now. I am in Ontario, in the cabins in the wood .
The cottages here are absolutely phenomenal. Grandma wanted us to spend holiday here. I think she just wanted to spend some time with me since I started university we spend less and less time together but she's always there for me when I need her.
I also see less of my therapist these days. Bet she feels sad that she doesn't see me anymore I mean who would want to lose me as a client . I miss her though, she was kind of cool in the last few months but I felt like it was time I started healing on myself. I know it sounds crazy right?.
I have made a significant change in my life. I no longer do what people expect me to do or what they want me to do ,now I only do what I want to do when I feel like doing it. I am tired of living according to peoples expectations, now I'm living for me and I love it.
The cottages around the lake of the most beautiful thing in the world here in Ontario. But mostly what I love about this place is the laughter of children and their families. it makes me think of how our family once was and I can't help but feel nostalgic.
I can't help but think of the good old days with all of us together and happy, laughter all around the dinner table and grandma and grandpa sharing a tender moment. I want all of that back and hopefully one day I will have it. After all no one can get the Del Luca family down.
I made friends by the way and I get along with most of my classmates. Everything is different here. No one knows who I am . UBC caters for type of international students so no one is more special than the other. It is actually a refreshing not being a princess and not being recognized as the girl who was switched at birth.
These days nonna is learning French, l think I forgot to mention that Miss Mael our neighbour is French .She's also started cooking food with lots of spices just to copy the Canadian culture. If you ask me I think she's on a quest to being a full blown Canadian.
Tell nonno that she misses him. She doesn't cry herself to sleep anymore but she still has the look that says that she is far away even though she's here. l think her anger has diminished but forgiveness and serenity will take her quite a while.
How is everyone back home doing. Have Fallon and Alex finally admitted they like each other, has Leone started maturing, please tell me Leonardo has finally started to talk and like people (and lost his brooding nature. l hope Elonzo has started to smile more and also enjoy life.
Tell them l love them and that tomorrow will be better for all of us, because it doesn't matter what today is like because the sun will shine tomorrow. This never ending darkness will end because the night will give way to day and the sun will shine again.
Take care of yourself daddy. Take care of nonna and my brothers because you give us strength to go on. Don't lose yourself or be weak because we all get our strength from you.
l love you to the moon and back....
Yours
Daddy's Princessa
5 years later...
"This room is messy"I heard my nonna complain from under the covers. She always wakes me up early even though I have nothing to do. I've been trying to look for a job ever since l got my my degree but l am always left disappointed .
"Go away" l murmured.
"Chase is here" Nonna said trying to get me out of bed but I wasn't even in the mood to see my best friend.
Honestly l didn't want see Chase for a completely different reason. After 4 years of our friendship he wanted to take things further.
l love Chase. l really do but l love him as my best friend/ brother and for all these years l thought he loved me for the same way. There's nothing wrong with him or anything lacking rather he is the heir of some high shot family in America and he is kind, loving, handsome etc.
He is perfect but l have issues and l am not in the right space and mind to commit to a relationship as yet. The only thing that l really want is to go home and be with the people l love.
My eyes prickle on that thought but tears don't form. l've spent 5 years learning how to harden my heart and block my emotions especially when it comes to thinking about my family but l can't help it. Every once a while l can't help but reminisce the memories.
"Tell him to go away "I said getting deeper under the covers.
"He can't because he's already inside" l heard Chase say and l pulled the covers off me. This was one of the reasons l didn't want to get in a relationship with Chase. He doesn't no how to take no for an answer.
And l don't mean in a romantic or sweet kind of way but in a creepy and forceful way. l guess l should have seen it coming. He's hinted over the years but l just needed his support and his friendship too much to notice and l regret it.
Him being here though meant that he hadn't given up his interest in me after the way l rejected him.
"Let's go grab breakfast "he said to me but his presence in my room had me so shocked that l couldn't even answer him.
l looked at nonna but she was looking at Chase as strangely as l was a few seconds ago. Nonna had warned me about Chase and she hadn't liked him from the day they met but l was sure that one day they would.
l haven't told her about what Chase said and l knew she wouldn't be happy about it. She has taken the role of protecting me for the last 5 years and she viewed Chase as a threat to me even though l didn't.
Yes the guy is strange and weird but he has been there for me and has supported me from the day we met. l just think that he is misunderstood because of his weird but cute nature which nonna calls stalkerish and obsessive.
l loved Chase but why did it feel wrong and freaky to be alone with him.