My Princessa - Chapter 85: Chapter 85

I made sure not to talk about our mother anymore because she was clearly a sore topic between everybody and I just came back and I don't want any tension whatsoever between us.
I think everybody doesn't know how to brotch the topic about the wedding and actually make peace with the fact that I'm getting married because they pink that I'm going to leave them forever or that it will create some sort of barrier between us but I'm here to stay and nothing or anybody will keep me away from my family.
it was really nice to be surrounded by my entire family but I definitely felt a bit disappointed because l hadn't spoken to Killian.
he made a big decision on my behalf and I really don't know what he feels about it and I know he has tried to tell me that it's okay and he wants this but I still feel like I'm ruining his life.
I left everybody in the living room just to get a few minutes to myself. my family is the best but sometimes they are overwhelming and sometimes I just question why they love me so much despite everything.
the whole incident has definitely set me back emotionally because a part of me now feels like I don't deserve to be part of this family because all I do is bring them problems.
" whatever you thinking about is wrong." I think she now knows me better than anybody because of the time we've spent together during these years.
" I'm not thinking about anything." lying to her is pointless but I couldn't help but do it.
She came and set next to me on the bed.
" I know when you're emotionally drained and you start thinking about things that don't exist." I don't think anybody will ever have a grandmother like mine.
This woman has loved me more than my mother ever did. she's sacrificed her whole world just to be there for me and I will forever be grateful.
" my life is about to take another turn and I'm not sure I'm ready for it." sometimes I wish I had a friend to talk to instead of her because I know my life stresses her out and I want her to get some rest and enjoy her life as well.
" I don't know what you're talking about because I know better than anybody that you were going to nail this wife thing." she said making me bust with laughter.
" I know that I can nail the wife thing but I'm not sure about the husband." I love Killian but I don't want him to make a mistake so that's why I'm not sure.
" I don't know about you but I don't think there's any person who can just fly halfway through the world to help a girl that he feels nothing for. I've seen that boy grow and I can tell you with full confidence that he has never shown that much care for anybody except his sister." it's reassuring to hear it from somebody else. my mind makes a lot of theories if I let it run so I'm glad that my grandmother has put me at easy a bit.
my nonna left soon after that and I found a phone and l few gadgets on my bed when l came from the bathroom. I couldn't help but smile because my brothers tend to go all out when it comes to me and I guess that hasn't changed.
luckily there were numbers on the phone and the ones that I wanted were there as well and l wasted no time using them.
I'm a bit shy when it comes to Killian but I really want to talk to him and just hear his voice.
" I've been expecting your call." he said before I could even say anything and I just stood there wide eyed.
" how did you know that it was me because this is a new phone." l asked.
" baby you're still using your old number." he said and it's not surprising that my brothers would go the extra mile to give me something like that and l'm glad.
" are you okay." I don't even know why I asked out of context but I just want him to be okay with everything because I now want this wording more than anything else.
" I'm fine and I just got a bit of good news." he said.
" the boy is alive and I don't think his Brothers will be waging war against us anymore because they know that it's in their best interests to stay away from us. " I don't know why but this news was supposed to make me happy instead I just didn't even know how to react anymore.
"Ohh." that was all I could say over the phone and I heard Killian chuckling.
" that's not the reaction I was going for but I'll take it." he said.
" what does that mean about us." I think I wanted him dead for some reason and if I think about it really did I think the reason is because l want to get married to the man that I love.
" it doesn't change anything, not only because we've already announced our wedding to everybody and it will make us look weak and stupid if we go against our word but because I want to spend the rest of my life with you." he said.
" I want to spend the rest of my life with you as well." I think I've wasted a lot of my time worried instead of living my life the way you want and now I'm willing to do it.
" I've already talked to my father and he also agrees that the wedding should be in the coming week." he said and I have no disagreements with that as long as my family also agrees because their opinion matters a lot to me.