Neighbor|Taekook - Chapter 48: Chapter 48

"This is an invasion of my privacy!"Jungkook blurted out.
"Are you hiding something, perhaps?" Taehyung looked at him, tilting his head.
"No! But there's a reason why I put a password on my laptop. I don't want other people using it. Besides, you know there's an incognito mode, I...I use it, so what's the point? Hyung, please give it back!"
"We're in a relationship, so we should be open with each other. I don't want you to be hiding anything."
"Yet you can hide so much stuff about yourself?!"
"You can ask me anything," Taehyung smiled slowly.
"And you'll give me a halfassed answer...I'm sick of it."
"You're getting this worked up about such insignificant thing? Now I really have to check what's in here."
"Tae, stop. Seriously, I don't want this...,"Jungkook started to fidget in frustration.
"And the reason is?"
"I...there might be embarrassing stuff...I don't know..."
"You're safe, you said you use incognito mode," Taehyung smiled,"I'll let you go through my history afterwards,"he winked at Jungkook.
"I bet there's nothing..."
"So deal?"
"I don't want to pry in your stuff..."
"I can tell that you're curious."
"Maybe a little bit..."
"So just relax. I won't judge you no matter how embarrassing you think it is."
Taehyung opened up the laptop.
"Let's see...so the most recent stuff...is for your essay? Korean literature, boring..."
"I have to finish it, the deadline is this weak."
"Okay, what's next...This is all stuff from today, funny stuff okay...And the afternoon, yeah..."Taehyung's fingers stopped scrolling.
Jungkook felt his heart sinking, he had and idea what there was.
"Judging by what I'm seeing, you're not as diligent as you say you are...Incognito mode...you clearly don't use it," Taehyung grinned.
"Wh...what is it?"
Isn't everyone's search history embarrassing? I shouldn't care...
"I'm not judging you, but..."
"I hate this, give it back!"Jungkook attacked Taehyung, his face beetroot red.
"This is too funny," Taehyung defended himself. "Does the butthole get permanently stretched? You were seriously looking that up on naver?!"
"Hyung, if you won't stop, I'm never speaking to you again!"
"You could've asked me instead....Oh my God," Taehyung continued to laugh,"or is it too embarrassing?"
"I don't want to talk about it,"Jungkook said, crossing his arms on a verge of a mental breakdown.
"Okay, well I hope you got your answer,"Taehyung chuckled and started scrolling again.
"Actually..."Jungkook fidgeted some more,"I didn't...I couldn't find anything..."
"Oh...Maybe you should study biology more."
"I checked in our textbooks first, there's nothing about it."
"That's surprising. Why don't they put a whole tutorial on anal sex?!"
"Very funny, hyung..."
"No, I'm serious,"he chuckled.
"So does it?"
"What?"
"You know...stretch..."
"Of course it does, try to take a hand mirror and check for yourself. Or maybe don't. You'll be traumatized."
"What? For real?! Oh my God, I didn't sign up for this! Do you have a mirror?!"his hand instinctively reached towards his butt.
"Don't worry Kookie, you'll be fine."
"How do I shrink it back?! Tae, you have to tell me!"
"Ah pabo, nothing stretches. Okay?"
"I don't believe you!"
"Then don't. Moving on," Taehyung suppressed his laugh.
"Hyung! Please tell me!"
Taehyung pretended that he couldn't hear him.
Who can give me the answer?! Such a simple question and no answer...Maybe if I try to search for some book in the library...Oh no way, what if someone would see me?! I would die...
"Right, on those days we were away, so going back to last weak...Not much stuff..."
Good thing he didn't look into my actual computer, just laptop...Mental note, delete everything!
"Hmm, what's the meaning of this?" Taehyung looked up.
"What?"Jungkook got nervous again.
"What counts as cheating? Why would you search for something like that?"
Oh that...
"I don't remember, just something I was curious about."
"Do you think I'm cheating? On you?"
"Not necessarily...Again, just something which crossed my mind, it's nothing serious."
"This is a good topic...what do you consider as cheating? Just so we have clear boundaries set."
"I don't know...Having sex?"Jungkook blushed even more.
"Well, isn't that obvious?"
"Yeah...Kissing maybe too..."
"Right, what else?"
"Anything physical...Like touching...down there maybe."
"Handjobs and blowjobs, for sure."
"And I think that's it."
"Is that really all? What about hugging?"
"That's fine, I think. Do you...do you hug many people?"
"No, I don't think so... I'm on the same page with you on all of these, good. What about emotional cheating?"
"What's that?"
"Fantasizing about someone else, having feelings for someone else, when your eyes constantly drift to someone else...There are many examples."
"Well, you aren't technically doing anything so...Is that cheating?"
"But you think about doing something."
"Yeah, but does it count? I don't think there's anything wrong with that."
"So you'd be okay if I was feeling something for a different guy?"
"I wouldn't be happy about it...but it's not something you can help, is it? As long as you don't act on your thoughts, I think it's fine."
"Interesting...You're more open minded that I had previously thought."
"Am I?"
"Yeah, anyway, let's be honest with each other if it happens."
"O...okay."
"Although I can't say I agree with you on this one."
"You don't?"
"No," Taehyung said sternly.
"Whoah, okay,"Jungkook laughed nervously,"I will have eyes only for you hyung, don't worry."
"You better...I want to be the only one for you, so I hope your heart and mind are aligned."
Jungkook nodded quickly.
"Let's see what's next."
"Oh my God, hyung. Hasn't this been enough? If you think you'll find some perverted things, you're wrong. I'd stopped watching stuff..."
"No more porn for Kookie? I take it as a compliment."
"Ugh..."
"You're so frustrated, that's cute...That means there has to be more stuff..."
"I don't even care anymore..."
"Hmmm how to know you're gay? I'm attracted to a guy? Oh how cute...And this was from, let's see...oh September! Really? Even at the beginning?"
"Well the moment I saw you, I knew something wasn't right. I mean, the way I felt...it was something new."
"Can a straight guy like a guy? Interesting...So what do you think now? Can a straight guy like another guy?"
"I don't know...maybe platonically...just how I liked Jimin-hyung."
"What?"
"I...it's not like that...I just, he was friendly...he still is....I like him, as a friend. So yeah a straight guy can like a guy."
"Wow, my ears aren't liking what they're hearing."
"Did I say something wrong?"
"I don't want to sound like an obsessive boyfriend, but seriously do not mention other guys to me. And especially liking them...it pisses me off."
"Well, I'm just being honest. Isn't that what you want?"
"Right..."Taehyung sighed. "A straight guy can like a guy...Except you're not straight, Jungkook,"he glared at him.
"Yeah...but I meant...God I don't even know what I meant...Whatever, I'm gay."
Taehyung grinned,"hmmm we can get quite philosophical on this one..."
"No we can't, this is torture enough, I thi-"
"Does it mean that you're gay if you like a guy? I don't think so...It can just be an infatuation, lust, whatever...If you're questioning-"
"Okay, yeah I get it, are we done? I don't like anyone else. No other guy. And I'm gay as fuck for you, the end."
What am I saying?!
Taehyung sighed and scrolled more. "How to be better at kissing...Seriously?
"Go ahead, laugh at me..."
"Oh, blow job tutorial....Banana? Oh wow, I'm speechless."
At that moment Jungkook died on the inside. Here it is, the most embarrassing moment of my life...Feels awful...
"And what's this? Grapefruit?"
"Don't..."
"Remember, I'm not judging you."
"Then why does it feel like you're doing just that right now?"
"Perhaps a little bit," Taehyung giggled. "Moving on, oh there some stuff. Regular straight porn...You like this?"
"Aish, I don't know!"
"Then come and look at this."
"No, thanks."
Taehyung turned the laptop towards Jungkook, playing the video on the screen.
"Oh God can you at least mute it?"
"Is this what gets you excited?"
"Not at all! This stuff...I remember...I didn't even get hard."
"No wonder..."
"You're judging even my taste in porn?"
"Yes I am,"Taehyung laughed.
"Understandable,"Jungkook's shoulders slumped in resignation.
"I'm getting bored, so quickly let me scroll some more...Oh this is from summer! Whoah...wait, what's this?"
"Summer? Oh no...hell no...Listen you don't understand...."
"This...this is some really kinky stuff..."
"I know, I know! I...I was feeling lonely, I just broke up with my girlfriend...So I watched some messed up stuff for no reason!"
Why the hell did I not clear my history?! I'm an idiot!
"You broke up?"
"Yeah, my mind wasn't in the right place, that's why the stuff there is so weird!"
"Wow..."
"I know it's weird stuff, don't judge me."
"No, I'm not really judging your kinks."
"I don't even know if those are my kinks! Yeah, I kinda liked it-"
"You really aren't a bad liar..."
"Wh...what?"
Taehyung whistled,"I'm impressed."
"Sorry?"
"You know, if you want to be a good liar, you should never get lost in your lies,"he closed the laptop and put it aside. "You should keep track of every single little lie you tell."
"I don't understand..."
"I'll be more careful. To be tricked by you...quite embarrassing..."
"Tricked by me?! What are you talking about hyung?"
"I get it, you were having a bad time because of your breakup during summer."
"Yeah exactly."
"Then what about the girl you broke up with right before Chuseok? You managed to get another girl in that time?"
Fuck!
"Ah..."
"Ah?" Taehyung's face looked menacing.
"I was an idiot, I'm so sorry hyung. I really broke up with her during summer. I knew I was going to move...Honestly, I don't know why I pretended that her and me are still together..."
"I don't give a shit about her."
"Oh...okay, yeah of course."
"What's bothering me is how easily you can lie...And how easily I believe you. Think that your heart is pure..."
"I'm really sorry, it was so stupid of me. I promise I won't ever lie to you again."
"Is that a lie as well?"
"No!"
Oh my God, how can I get out of this?
"I...actually feel the same way about her like you. I don't give a shit, so it's not an important thing...I would never lie to you about something serious."
"Fine, whatever,"Taehyung said, with an obvious annoyance in his voice. "My part of the deal. You wanted to see my history, go ahead," Taehyung moved his chair aside.
"I...don't need to see it," Jungkook felt horrible.
"A deal is a deal. Come on,"he gestured towards his computer.
"As you wish,"he walked to Taehyung's desk, his hand hesitantly found the mouse and clicked on the Internet history.
"No way."
"What's that? Not what you were expecting?"
"I knew there would be nothing...You tricked me..."
"Did I? I guess we're even."
"For God's sake, Tae, will you keep using this one stupid little lie against me forever? Just forget about it please."
"I guess I need to be careful around you."
"Great..."Jungkook sighed with frustration.
"You should be too. It takes a liar to know one."
"What the fuck?"
"Do not think you can play with me. If there's more lies, I will figure them out. And it won't be pretty."
"Oh my God, hyung I said I'm sorry! You don't need to threaten me like this."
"Fine..."
"Do you hate me?"
"Hate you?" Taehyung looked up at him.
"Yeah, for lying."
"I'm not happy about it. But hating you? Impossible,"his face softened and he opened up his arms.
Jungkook got the hint and leaned in for a hug.
"I have to say this made me trust you a bit less,"Taehyung confessed. "As I said, I don't want us to be hiding anything from each other."
"I understand completely...My heart hurts...I'm such an idiot."
"I feel sad..."
"Me too."
"Then shall we study a bit more and call it a night?"
"Okay,"Jungkook left Taehyung's arms and took back his laptop.
Meanwhile Taehyung's mom returned and prepared some food for them while they were studying quietly. Somehow the mood changed and for once Jungkook was happy when he was leaving Taehyung's apartment late at night.
"Good night,"Jungkook whispered and gave Taehyung a quick peck on the cheek, standing in the hallway.
"Sleep well,"his hyung ruffled his hair,"and get better."
"I'll try."
"Text me if you won't feel good in the morning and stay at home."
"Sure."
"Okay."
"Once again, I'm sorry,"Jungkook tapped the laptop he was carrying in his arms.
"I forgive you, don't worry Kookie."
"Okay," Jungkook awkwardly turned around,"I'll go back to my place."
"Yeah."
"See you,"he bowed to his hyung.
Taehyung chuckled quietly and closed the door.
Jungkook opened the door to his apartment, his parents already asleep. He sighed deeply and tiptoed to his room. He dropped off his backpack, textbooks and laptop.
I need some air...
He took warmer clothes from his wardrobe and put them on. He grabbed his keys and phone and silently sneaked out of his place.
At least I don't feel sick anymore...But shit, this got kinda nasty today...Now he thinks I'm a liar...Oh well there's no way for me to fix it now...
It was past midnight and the streets were rather empty. He encountered few drunk people, couples returning late from their date, some tourists...But he felt alone with his thoughts. The cold air was biting into his skin, so he tucked his hands into the pockets of his jacket.
He found himself walking along Han River, flowing calmly as usual. He took few steps down to get closer to the water and walked in the direction of the flow.
Oh this is where I threw away that soju bottle. It seems like ages ago...He recollected how he felt at that time. After that shitty night...He put a paper inside the bottle, writing a message. A message for himself. Those white letters...
-Forget him-
Haha that didn't work, did it? But I'm happy like this, aren't I? So I shouldn't feel bad...No, I don't feel bad.
He took a deep breath and smiled to himself.