NIRELLE - Chapter 48: Chapter 48

"What are you sorry for? The video? It's not your fault; it was not like you knew he was going to take a video of what happened and then put it online, trying to bash us." I know that Theo was not blaming me, but that was all it sounded like to me. If I had behaved then, this would not have happened at all.
"I should have controlled my anger as well," he added, and I have to say that he did a good job putting his anger in check after Cassian had referred to him as a dog. I wonder if the roles had been reversed if Cassian would have been able to handle it.
"I am still at fault. If I had just listened instead of trying to take revenge on Lucien for being a jerk, then this wouldn't have happened." I notice how quiet Lucien is being and how comfortable I am with addressing him by his first name again.
"Lucien, convince her that this is not her fault," Theo said, looking at the slightly flustered man. I could not figure out what made him so flustered.
He closed his eyes and nodded. "Theo is right; you did not know that he was a manipulator, and the victims shouldn't get blamed; the manipulator should."
"I agree," I say with a nod before I turn my attention back to Theo, who seemed to be fully present. "So what are you going to do with Cassian now?"
"We have taken down the video; it was tough, but we did." Theo sounded proud, and maybe it was something to be proud of, but I could not yet fully grasp the entirety of the situation.
"That's good."
"I still think you shouldn't go out, at least for today; some of Dr. Cassian's fans might be angry and try to retaliate by hurting you."
"Do you think that would happen?" Now, hearing Theo mention it, I was afraid. I had taken the liberty to research Cassian, and he came out as more popular than even some celebrities. He was the doctor who cared for everyone. He started a program at the hospital where the poor who needed medical attention could get treated at no cost at all. All they had to do was show up and get treated. If he was so good, why did he turn out to be a master manipulator?
"I am almost certain that it would happen," Theo said with a nod.
"I know you are worried, and that is the reason why you are saying this, but I would have my guards with me at all times so you don't have to worry. I am sure that what they all want is for us to cower in fear, but with me making a bold statement out in public today, it would show them that we are stronger than they think." I have no idea where all of that speech came from, but I was going to run with it anyway.
"If anything happens, don't hesitate to call me." He sounds as if he would be preparing for the worst, and I should do so as well. I nod in agreement and wave my phone in his face.
Lucine finally clears his throat as if he had just come out of hibernation; he looks from person to person and presses his lips together. "You can't go," he declares at once as if it were a command.
"You said I could go out anytime I want," I respond, knowing that he was worried and that was the reason for his reaction.
"I know I did, and I regret saying it, but it's dangerous."
"And I have bodyguards," I shot back at him. He looked defeated, but I knew he was not going to allow me to win just yet. "It's a nice solo date," I add.
"You have that list; we can continue with things from it," he said. They both looked at each other, and I could tell that there was something they weren't telling me.
"You are hiding something from me," I say, and he shakes his head almost too soon. "You both are. I told you that if you want my help with you on all of this, then you must not hide anything from me."
"We know," Theo said before Lucien could stop him. "She has to know," was his response to Lucien's glare.
"It's nothing that you need to be worried about," Lucien said.
"Clearly it's something," I say, taking a deep breath. "What do you know?"
"That you are going to see Cassian and that he might try to do something to harm you."
"Are you spying on me?" I asked, almost gasping in horror and shock. "How can you both do something so detestable? Was it because of yesterday?"
"No one is spying on you," Lucien said, cutting through my ramble before I could say something I clearly did not mean. "Cassain was proud of himself that he sent Theo a screenshot of your conversation to meet today."
The more I think I can figure Cassian out, the worse he gets. If he can send screenshots of my chats, what else can he do?
"So why did you let me make a fool out of myself right now?" I ask, wishing that the chair I was sitting on would just turn into jelly and swallow me whole.
"You told me to trust you." The words from Lucien pierced through me, sounding like an accusation. I bow my head slightly, watching the now cold pancakes sitting in front of me, yet to be touched.
"I wanted to trust that you would tell me." He didn’t raise his voice. He didn’t move. He just watched me like he was still waiting for something, something I could not figure out.
"But I didn't," I murmur, and he shifts in the chair.
"I can understand that it is hard for you to learn how to trust me, and it's fine; it's all still new to us both, so we can be patient." His words were not the response I had rehearsed in my head. I stare at him, waiting for him to point his fingers in my face and laugh at how gullible I am being, but it never comes.
"And if you still want to go, then you can go; I will just have twice the number of guards go with you."
“I want to go,” I murmur, and he nods. I don't know if his reaction is genuine or if he is forcing himself, but it feels like a very huge step.
“And if anything feels off, even a little, you call me. Don’t try to be brave alone, okay?”