Rejecting The Alpha Twins - Chapter 183: Chapter 183

Fiona POV
“Beg my forgiveness?” I echoed back, confused, wondering if I was the reason she had come back, unable to hold back my surprise.
What was there to forgive? As it was, I felt as though she needed to forgive me and all my actions of the past.
Didn't she understand yet? Had I not made myself clear? She seemed to be under the mistaken impression that I still hated her, and I couldn't believe it. I truly understood now all the sacrifices she'd been forced to make and how torn she had been when it came to me and Celeste.
There was nothing I needed to forgive her for. But she seemed determined as she stared at me steadily with unblinking eyes and a fierce expression on her face. I had no choice but to listen to what she had to say. I waited, interested in what she was about to blurt out and wishing she didn't feel the need to. This was her time, however, granted by the moon goddess,s and I had to listen to learn what it was she needed to tell me. I was aware of every moment, every minute that was passing by, certain any minute now, the moon goddess would take Regan away before we both got to say the words we so badly needed to.
“I have so many regrets when it comes to you, Fiona. I treated you badly. When you were but nothing more than a small childl, you wanted my attention so much,” she breathed, “and I turned it all on Celeste. I ignored you even though you didn’t deserve it. I took out all my hatred I had for your mother. I turned it on you. That wasn’t okay,” she continued as I stood there in shock, “and through the years my dislike of you only continued to grow, despite the fact you hadn’t done anything wrong. When you were first born,” she explained quietly, “I promised you something. I promised to adopt you and treat you as my very own. I failed that promise. I failed you," she finished grimly." I was a monster and malicious to a little girl who never deserved it."
But she had also taught me so much, even if I wanted to admit the truth to myself. She had taught me the value of independence, to rely on nobody but myself. It had been a harsh lesson for somebody as young as I was to learn, but it had been invaluable as well.
My eyes stung as I divulged her words and acknowledged that for me, they were true. I had never truly felt as though I was her daughter, but for her to acknowledge it now only surprised me. I couldn’t believe the moon goddess had given us a chance to be with one another once more, even if it was only for us to finally say our regrets in peace. It was bittersweet. I let out a sigh, unaware I had been holding my breath.
“I know you didn’t mean it,” I choked out, tears trailing down my cheeks, “and I know you did your best under the circumstances. I might have resented you for it and for all the attention you showed Celeste, but I don’t hate you. At least not anymore,” I sobbed.
Why would I hate somebody who had died, trying to save her pack members and her family from a rogue attack? Even now, she was trying her best to protect me, and I didn't need that from her anymore. I could protect myself even if it felt as though my heart was breaking.
It wasn’t worth holding onto a grudge. I felt as though a huge burden had been lifted off my shoulders as I stared at the woman I could finally call my mother. She was no longer a stranger to me but a welcome presence and one that I would miss. If only she could stay, but I knew how impossible that was. The moon goddess rarely granted rebirths. Still, I could not deny how happy I was to be able to see Regan again, if only for these brief few minutes.
“Still, it wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair to you, Fiona. Your father,” she paused, “Xander loved you, and because of me, he did the same thing I did when it came to ignoring your needs. We both failed you in that regard. You should never have felt as though the only choice you had was to sever ties.”
Sever ties and the bond with the family. I now regret that decision more than ever. Why had I made it so irrationally? Why had I not waited to see how things would pan out between us all? Why had I walked away?
“I know. But that’s all in the past now,” I moved to embrace her, feeling my tears drip onto her shoulder as she remained in my hold, “I told you, there’s nothing to forgive, not anymore. I love you, Regan, and I always will.”
I would keep her in my heart and always in my mind. I knew now that no matter what, she would always be keeping watch over me and my fathers. She was going to see us all again one day, I thought blankly, but not until we were dead and gone. It would be a long time, a lifetime, until I could see her again. I tried not to cry at the thought.
I could let go of all my past hurts and pain. It was enough that I got to see her again one last time. I could feel Selena watching us, a strange expression on her face. Until now, she had remained quiet, and it was impossible to know what exactly the moon goddess was thinking, let alone what she was feeling as she watched this scene unfold in front of her very eyes.
“If I could do it over, if I could go back in time, I would change things,” Regan vowed, her voice muffled with emotion. “I would go back and I would do it right. Show you how much I love you and how proud I am of you.”
But it was too late for that. Too late for any of it. I was vehemently aware that Reagan would not be there for me soon, so I held onto her as tightly as I possibly could. I never wanted to let her go. But I knew it was inevitable.
I shook my head. “I don’t need you to go back in time. I don’t need any of that. I need you,” I sobbed, wishing she could stay with me. “I just need you.”
She cupped my cheek, her eyes sparkling. “I know, darling girl, and I wish that too. You’re going to make a wonderful mother one day, and I know that you aren’t going to make the same mistakes I did when it comes to you and Celeste.”
We both knew I wouldn't. My children would all be loved unconditionally as I had always hoped when I was lucky enough to have some someday.
“I want you to be there for your grandchildren,” I breathed, feeling my heart twist painfully in my chest, “I want my children to be able to know their grandmother.”
I heard a sniffle come from the moon goddess and turned slightly to see a tear trickle down her pale cheek. “It’s such a touching scene” she said as Regan turned also, “and I can’t help but be moved by it. I have a lot of people come to me in death with regrets,” she added, “but none more so than the two of you and I can’t help but feel guilty for the way that both of your lives panned out. I, too, was mother to Isabelle and to you both. So I am going to undo all the wrong that has been done.”
Undo the wrong that had been done? What was the moon goddess hinting at? There was now a wide smile on her face. Regan shifted uncomfortably on her feet.
“I know I have to go back…” she began, and the moon goddess shook her head.
We both stilled. I dared to hope, my heart beating wildly in my chest as I stared at the moon goddess with hope.
“No darling heart, you don’t. That’s what I’m trying to say. I’m giving you a second chance to make it right with your daughter,” she nodded at me. “You can stay, but you have to change your behavior towards Fiona here, or else I will come back for you,” she warned.
For a moment, the two of us struggled to comprehend her words. I stared at her, and then realization dawned. “You’re giving Regan a rebirth?” I asked in awe.
“In a sense. She’s reborn, but back to the stage she was when she died. I want the two of you to be able to let go of past hurts and move forward together on a journey of peace and healing.”
I rushed to the moon goddess and flung my arms around her, unable to hold back my joy.
“Thank you,” I blubbered, sobbing wildly. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
I couldn’t stop. The moon goddess laughed and then delicately stood back, turning to Regan once more.
“I wish you better luck in this life. Be warned, I cannot intervene again, so if you should die, the next time will be permanent. However,” she tilted her head, a beguiling look on her face, “I have a feeling that this lifetime is going to proceed exactly as I imagine it will, and you will all be very happy together,” she beamed.
“Is there anything we can do for you?” I sucked in a breath.
Regan still looked shell-shocked. To be given a second chance by the moon goddess was a blessing. One that had almost caused her to fall over in surprise. This was an opportunity for both of us to be able to move forward and embrace the future together.
Selena shook her head. “Just live your lives and enjoy the time you have together.”
She smiled and then, as we watched, she faded, almost vanishing right in front of our eyes. It was as though she had never been there. I turned to Regan, half expecting her to be gone as well, feeling as though I had just awakened from some strange dream, but she still stood there, as solid as ever. My tears flowed even more.