ROTTEN LOVE - Chapter 14: Chapter 14

Telling the group about a pending competition with the werewolves did not go smoothly. Everyone was against it. It seems my idea to loosen the tension will be a failure. The vamps see it as a waste of time.
There was a bunch of 'those mutts don't have a chance, why waste our time' and my personal favorite 'We aren't dog trainers.'
Even my witches were against it. They thought it was a way of humiliation. Given that the vamps and the wolves are blessed with super abilities, they thought it would be unfair.
Jason and I are the only ciphers. My witches can cast spells, use herbs and nature to get help from our surroundings, but they would not have enough time to do that in the middle of a field.
I left them, a headache in tow. The competition will have to be canceled. There is no point in forcing them.
Such bad sports.
Not that I can blame them. All they hear is how wolves are low lives. They are only here to protect the Malfattos.
They worship Marisa and Maddox. Every vamp glorifies their pure lines. The vamps in our region are no different.
Ultimately, they came to make sure no harm comes to them. They were thrilled that Marisa will not be destined to wed one of the wolves. Kind of hurts that they were so eager with the idea to replace Marisa with me.
I mean, I don't object. I know now that everything seems to have a way to fall into place but still. I have protected my home forever. Years of servitude mean nothing to the vamps as long as their precious lines are not touched.
I have spent the entire afternoon working out schedules and arrangements for the group. Our stay will be long, and we needed to get all the logistics figured out. I even laid ground rules.
The most important rule for the vamps is that no one feeds off Zain's pack. Everyone should stick with their given partner, one of my witches. My witches are willing participants. Both groups have grown up with one another. We are a strong unit which is why this group is so resilient. If that does not suffice, then we will figure out other means.
It's dark out. Maddox and I make our way back to Zain's compound. I have not heard anything from Jason. I am nervous. I hope that for our sake, Maddie and he do not try to puzzle things together.
Marisa stayed watching over Adam. He started to gain consciousness and she wants to personally make sure he recuperates. She truly feels bad. I feel awful that I put her in that situation.
Walking next to Maddox is quiet and peaceful. We do not have to say anything to one another. When times were hard at home, we often enjoyed simply being in one another's presence. No words. No touching. Only being nearby would erase the edge of that day's hardship.
It was our way of keeping up that wall between us but still never letting go of hope. It all seems ridiculous now.
There is no hope for us. I know it. Zain knows it, but Maddox does not.
I should let him know, yet something deep in me is telling me that it would only end in disaster.
The silence is broken by him, "What's wrong, amica mea?"
That's twice today.
"Stop calling me that," I give him a disapproving face.
"You never had a problem with it before," he raises his eyebrow.
"That was then. It's not appropriate anymore."
"Because of the wolf," he scoffs, stopping in his tracks.
I look at him hesitantly. His eyebrows scrunch as he studies my face. I try to avoid his gaze by looking down at my shuffling feet. It's never easy being under Maddox's scrutiny.
When he does, I feel nervous, sweaty, anxious, and self-conscious. I feel everything at once.
At this moment without Zain's presence, it's only me and Maddox, the vamp who has always held my heart.
Who covered my ears as they killed my mother.
Who took responsibility at an early age for all three of us.
My heart beats for him.
I am ridiculous. On one hand, there is Zain who is new, and the chemistry is natural, almost forceful. If the necklace was removed, I would not be able to eat, sleep or live without him. That's how much my body wants Zain.
Then, on the other hand, anything with Maddox is complicated. It's been about restraint and following given fates, not chosen ones. He is taken, even if he does not have a partner. His destiny is our biggest rival.
My body can think with his presence, but it wants to stop thinking. I can restrain myself. I have choices with Maddox. We have history. But we are history.
I must keep reminding myself. Love should not be so hard. And it's not.
It's not when I am with Zain. Tossing Maddox aside should be a no-brainer. It was earlier on in the day after discovering me and Zain are mates.
Yet, here in the darkness alone with Maddox, as he pierces me with those amber eyes, allowing the night's natural glow to illuminate his beautiful face, makes me breathless. It takes me back to all those nights I would look at him and marvel at his strength.
He is beautiful not because of his gifted physique and aristocratic grace. Rather because of the strength he provides for his subjects, for me and his family. Putting us first before him. His means are not the best all the time, but the motives are good.
The silence as we look into each other's eyes is suffocating. It was a comfort a few seconds ago. Now, it seems like the air has left my body. I look away from him, but his fingers guide my chin up, slowly.
I can feel myself quiver. My throat parched. He looks at all of me despite never moving his gaze away from my eyes. I feel like he can see right through me.
"I will not change my ways with you because the big man can't take the heat," he says looking into me.
"Do it for me," I practically beg.
I need to separate us, to stop this from ever restarting. I was trying to do this earlier before Maddie interrupted.
He searches my face to see if there is even a centimeter of doubt. There is but he won't find any regret in it. I will not regret this plea to him which is more important than any doubt. I can live with doubt, but regret will be consuming.
I don't want to wake up the next morning and feel like I am stringing Maddox. I don't want time to pass without choosing a man for the sake of myself and them.
Zain and Maddox have the right to a loyal female. If I can't do that for them, then I am afraid I will regret it for the rest of my life. I have doubted many things in my life but never my character. I will not start acting like a flimsy one.
He releases my chin and puts his hands behind his back. His lack of contact allows for some air to go through my useless body.
He puts on the carefree aristocratic arrogance that he portrays to the world in front of me.
The wall is coming up again.
Before it does all the way, I grab the front of his shirt, not sure what I am going to say but I know it can't end like this. I owe him more than that. I owe myself more than that.
"I am sorry, Maddox. It was real for me all these years. We have played ourselves long enough. It's time to let go," I say, almost choking up on the words.
It is hard to voice them.
He looks down at my hand on his shirt, making sure he keeps his behind his back restrained, and with an indifferent voice, he says, "seems to me like the one who is not ready to let go is you."
My eyes quiver as I observe our current position. It is me. It's always me. I have this sick need of wanting him near me. I am not ready to let go of my security blanket, and it's unfair.
I slowly release his shirt. I take a step back. I want him to grab me and tell me not to let go. I want him to hug me and say it's not over till he wishes it so. I want him to say anything that will enable me to remain by his side, and not create a bigger division between the two.
But he does not do any of that. He is ready to release me. His wall is up completely.
I turn to face forward again to resume our walking, trying to fight the tears I felt building up, but he calls out for me.
I do not look at him. I allow him to speak to my back. I feel him take a step forward. His breath lingers down my neck.
"You will always be amica mea to me, Helena. It was real to me too. It's not easy letting anyone have you, but I do it for you. So that you may have a chance for a burden-free love. We have no future. The wolf can give you a stable one, and that is good enough for me," he says lowly.
I shake my head up and down in understanding, discreetly wiping a tear from my face. I take a step forward.
"Never forget you have a choice. I am doing this because you agreed with the fate Marisa laid out for you. Make no mistake, however, if you choose tomorrow, in a year or a decade from now that you no longer want that path, then I will come for you. No explanations are needed. I'll always be there for you," Maddox says as he passes me up this time.
I look at his back as he walks in front of me, releasing some of that sadness I feel. Reminding me that I have a choice is the biggest gift he could have given me.
He meant his words. He will guide me when need be. For now, I will follow him like when we were children until it's finally time to separate, when I finally have to leave his side and stay with my mate.
We enter Zain's compound to shouting and chaos. I hear one distinct voice above all, Zain. He is shouting orders left and right.
I see Maddox quickly stiffening, preparing for whatever gets thrown our way. Hearing the anger in Zain's voice has my mind jumbled. I start moving toward it to find out what is wrong.
Maddox grabs my wrist, "Wait, Helena, don't wonder. Stick next to me. We don't know what is going on."
I nod in agreement. Maddox lets go of me and takes the lead. I follow quickly beside him. The voice leads us to Zain's office. The door is open. I get to see a glimpse of Zain's wide shoulders moving up and down at the rhythm of his picked-up breathing.
"Go and find them, now," he roars.
The office quickly becomes empty as members rush past me in a hurry to execute their alpha's orders. We take the opportunity to rush inside ourselves. Beta Max is the only one in the room with Zain.
Max is keeping his distance, closer to the door while Zain is staring out the window near his desk. Zain must be out of it because he does not even pick up on my presence.
"What is wrong," I say as I get closer to him.
Zain instantly turns around and meets me halfway. He encompasses me in a big hug. I can feel his erratic heart. I lay my head on his chest. I give him a minute to process himself. It's also a minute to myself to prepare for what is to come because it can't be something good.
After a minute, I break off slightly and place my palm on his face. He keeps his hands on my waist.
I repeat myself, "What's wrong?"
At first, there is a troubled expression in his eyes, then Maddox makes an irritated sound, and Zain zeros his attention on him. Max closes the office door for privacy, I presume. But I notice how he is now positioned behind Maddox.
They are hurdling him. I wiggle out of Zain's grip, and walk toward Maddox, positioning myself in front of Maddox's chest.
This time with distaste in my voice, I repeat, "What the hell is going on?"
"Come here, Helena," Zain orders.
"No, answer me first," I squish my body closer to Maddox as I notice Zain and Max take one step closer to us.
My hands reach behind searching for any skin contact with Maddox to ensure he is indeed safe. Also, I will need it to cipher if things go a miss. Maddox helps and grabs my hands.
I squeeze them tight to reassure him, but I am reassuring myself. With his essence, I can cipher us out of trouble and protect us until we get to the rest of the group. Again, I anxiously step back against his chest, or he steps forward toward my back, but we are closer than ever.
"I would answer her question, alpha Zain. You might not know her well, but I can assure you she is not playing any games. I, myself, am getting irritated as to why you and your colleague think it wise to corner me in a confined space. Not the brightest idea," Maddox threats.
I can feel Maddox's rigid chest moving as he speaks. The strength in his voice vibrates through me.
"Do not play with me, Malfatto. Where are they," Zain steps closer.
I stick one of my hands out, "Take a step further and I will blast you across the room."
"You don't know. Stay out of it. You should be at my side not guarding that thing," Zain barks.
"I don't take orders from you. Start talking unless you want to meet the wall," I threaten again.
"Ask him, he took them," Zain points at Maddox.
I rest my hand back down on Maddox's and look up behind me. I see Maddox not making any facial changes. Well, to an outsider it appears so, but if you look close enough, he slightly scrunches his eyebrow.
He is confused which is all I needed to confirm.
Maddox sounds irritated, "Considering I do not know who you are referring to, then I think we can assume I am also unaware as to where they are at."
"Your smell was all around the area and traces of blood," Zain answers.
"Maddox has been with me the whole time I was with my coven," I interject.
"The proof is still there. His smell is present. He was there," Zain argues, "now, where is she?"
I hear a snarl from Maddox, "I don't know who she is."
"My sister. She was in the green room. We went to go find her and it was a mess. No traces of her just your smell and some blood," Zain grits.
His sister is missing. My brother was with her.
I take a step forward, "where's my brother?"
This snaps Maddox's attention. He takes a step too. His hands travel to my shoulders as he presses his mouth against my ear, "Jason was with his sister."
I can feel myself trembling as I nod in confirmation. Maddox straightens himself up. I look back and see a new face on him. It's his angry face. The face of a commander. He will take charge from here on.
"Take me to the site," Maddox orders Zain, his grip on my shoulders firm but comforting.
"You are the main suspect. I am taking you nowhere besides the dungeons," Zain crosses his arms.
"I am tired of your accusations. Jason is tied to me. If I wanted to harm him, I would be harming myself, you brute," Maddox replies.
"I'm sure nothing will happen to Jason but what of my sister? It could be a plan to create tension with me and Helena," Zain says.
I scoff, annoyed, "You are doing a good job yourself at achieving that. I know Maddox did not do anything. As we said, he was with me the whole time and our crew. Not to mention that we came here for this alliance. Maddox contacted you first. He has no motives. Now, stop wasting our dam time and take us to the site before you truly ruin everything between us."
"You trust him more than my judgment," Zain says in disbelief.
"I know him more than I do you," I answer the question with a cold tone.
Here he is interrogating us when my brother is missing. We are the last people who would want something bad to happen to Jason. As for Maddie, kidnapping her is not a way of gaining brownie points with the pack. So, no, Maddox would not execute that plan either.
"Fine," Zain storms past us.
We follow, and again, I notice Max stationing himself behind us. Maddox walks by my side. I make sure to never let go of his hand.
We get outside and I see two of our vamps stationed out like how we arranged. We give them a signal, and immediately they knew what to do. One followed while the other grabbed the rest of the group.
This is what we were doing all day. Working on the kinks and drills just in case. Zain has no idea what he is talking about. It's easy to blame the vampire, but I thought after today, he would understand that they are important to me.
He said he would protect Marisa even if our bond was broken, but it's a lie. Look how quickly he has turned on Maddox.
We get to the greenhouse. It's the same one Zain took me during our walk. I get inside and there are plants knocked over. There was a fight here.
Maddox and I look around. Our crew quickly catches up.
I hear growls and snarls outside along with a very angry voice, "Move out my way, mutt, or I will move you."
Marisa.
We walk to look outside the greenhouse. Marisa is squaring up to Max. Max seems unfaced.
I look at Zain with an arched eyebrow.
He sighs before ordering, "Let her in. The rest stay out."
Marisa stomps her way toward us not before cursing out Max. I give the group a look and they all keep watch in formation. Max has called some reinforcements too.
Marisa comes inside looking at Zain, "You just saved your little beta from an ass-kicking," she huffs as she gets to me, noticing my hands in Maddox's.
She instantly changes her demeanor. There would only be one reason I would be holding Maddox's hand so openly. Danger.
She rushes to my side. Holds my other hand.
"I am here, Helena," she says gently.
She is letting me know I can cipher her. I can let go of Maddox if I want but I don't. Without me being connected to Maddox, they might find it easier to grab him.
I turn to her, "Jason is missing. They think it was Maddox."
She releases my hand understanding as to why I can't take her offer.
She snaps her head at Zain, "They would think that but wasn't he last seen with that little she-wolf."
"Maddie is missing too," Zain growls at her.
"Down, boy," she snarls, "so they both are gone. Could they be shacking up somewhere," she suggests.
We all look around the green room. She follows suit.
"Point taken, but we are missing one of our own. My brother would feel the loss even greater. His life is connected to Jason's. Do you forget or can your wolf brain not separate true motive from jealousy," Marisa says.
"I smell Maddox in this room," Zain argues.
Marisa does a subtle sniffing motion. The vamps have a strong smell too, but it's mostly when it comes to picking up blood scent. They can't pick up things like arousal, or heat like the wolves do.
Marisa looks at Maddox, "I do smell you."
She follows the scent, and we walk behind her. Zain almost bumps into us. The passageway between counters is narrow. Our eyes meet, then he looks down at my hands still connected with Maddox's.
He says nothing. There is a type of hurt in his eyes. I allow him to pass first then Maddox and I follow behind. At another time, I would be concerned with Zain's feelings but right now my brother is missing.
Maddox is threatened. Zain will have to be on the back burner. He does not have me pleased.
Marisa stops and crouches down. She trails her finger down a red blob. Blood.
She licks it and looks at Maddox. Maddox comes from behind me to do the same, but I pull him back. I don't want him away. It's still dangerous.
"He is alone with us three in here. We would get to him before he can call his pack. He would be a fool to try and do something in here," Maddox assures me.
I hesitantly let go of him. Maddox crouches down and does the same thing with the blood, tasting it. I take this moment to look at Zain. I see disgust on his face. He catches my stare and I quickly snap my attention back to the scene.
I do not want to be caught gawking at him. Maddox straightens up.
"It is me," Maddox says.
"Tell me something I don't know. No, tell her so she can understand why your blood is present in a scene that seems to yell confrontation. The last known place Maddie and Jason were seen," Zain crosses his arm.
I roll my eyes at his jab. He is relentless.
Marisa interjects, "It is my brother's but it's not wholly his. I taste Jason."
"You guys are not helping his case. I would assume Jason is not much of a coward that he would let someone kidnap my sister. He would get hurt in a confrontation with the Malfatto," Zain preaches.
"Would you stop it already?! Listen to them before you interrupt. Listen to me dam it. Jason cannot hurt Maddox without hurting himself and vice versa. They would not do it. Ever. They never have. Marisa and I have fought more than them," I yell at him.
"Yet, it's still their blood present," Zain fights back.
"It is old," Maddox says.
"Quite old, like a decade or more," Marisa finishes.
They seem puzzled like me.
A thought crosses my mind. I search around the blood. There is hardly any left. The amount was small, to begin with before they tasted it. I look around a plant. Nothing.
I get on my hands and knees. Behind one of the table's legs, I see something black. I reach out and grab it.
I get up and examine the piece of string. Right in the middle, a cracked circle dangles. In reality, it looks nothing like a circle. Shards are missing from the pendant, but I know what it is.
I simultaneously touch my pendant. This is Jason's pendant and it's shattered. Completely obliterated.
I look at Maddox and Marisa as the realization hits them too. My brother is missing. His bond with Maddox is completely free without restraints.
Every second he is gone, he is at the mercy of those who trapped him. But every second, Maddox is also at the mercy of a bloodlust episode.