Same But Different - Chapter 62: Chapter 62

Yuri's POV
Yuri clenched her toes; she was unable to open her eyes. Her mind was awake but her body was still asleep. She has felt this before. What a weird feeling it was, to have many things run through her mind but unable to react to any of them.
She had sleep paralysis the night Sasha arrived. So, did that mean Sasha left? She wanted to freak out but she still couldn't move her body.
"No, Sasha you can't leave me, again" She felt tears flow down her cheeks. "I won't survive without you"
As soon as she could move, she quickly got up from her bed and ran outside. She waited outside as Jason's car pulled through the driveway. It was nice to know that he was always on standby. She rushed to his arms trying to control her panic attack.
"What happened?" Jason asked stroking her hair but she could not stop bawling her eyes.
"I think .. I think she's gone again" Yuri whispered.
"No" Jason stared at her in disbelief. "We should go to Nick right now"
"Oh god, Jason I won't be able to recover from this" Yuri murmured sitting in the car. She knew it would be too much for her if Sasha was gone for good. Again.
"No, don't give up hope. We will fight and break down whatever wall that is blocking the way to your portal" Jason reassured.
"Ahh I don't know what to do, I had sleep paralysis after two years and now I can't call out Sasha anymore. I don't hear her voice in my head either" She exclaimed. Sasha was gone, she felt it. She knew the worst was happening and there was no way to stop it.
"Let's just calm down for a minute. We'll freak out after what Nick says, okay? Can you promise me that Yuri?" Jason drove the car as fast as he could. Yuri could tell from his face that he was just trying to console her but deep down he was freaking out too.
"Okay" Yuri whispered. There was no energy left in her body. The meaning of life had been lost on her. How could she fall in love with someone so much? Why was it impossible for her to imagine her life without Sasha? Sasha had done everything in her power to make sure Yuri was happy, and she was. She was the happiest she's been throughout her entire life. Why was God taking that away from her now? After beating the tumor, after losing her for five months and then having her back to only lose her again in the end? This was not fair.
Jason parked the car in front of the clinic and opened the car door, waiting for Yuri to step out but she couldn't.
"Come on Yuri get out of the car"
"I can't" She was physically unable to move. Her mind was filled with thoughts. Some negative and some positive.
"Yes you can!" Jason hugged her.
"Going back to Dr. Nick won't help, Jason.. she's gone. I can feel it, she's gone" Yuri said at last. There was no going back and forth with this. Yuri felt her heart breaking into a million piecies.
"Now what? We sit and wait for her to come back? We need to get her back!" Jason exclaimed. His refusal to believe the inevitable was somewhat encouraging but too sad for Yuri to bear.
"I cant breathe .. " Yuri placed her hand on her heart and cried out. She was hurting bad.
"Okay Yuri, listen to me, pull yourself together. She comes back, she always does" No amount of reasoning would help the situation. People come into your life and then sometimes people goes. They have no choice but to leave. In this case, Sasha must have found herself.
"You don't understand; this is about her. It was her memories she was recalling. She is somewhere else, maybe she belongs there"
"Yes" The car door was still open and as Yuri would not get out of the car, Jason bent down on one knee to explain this theory. Many people stared but he didn't care. "Yuri, yes! You're right. She belongs to wherever she came from. We look for her there"
"But we don't even know that she is .."
"Do you have a better idea?" Jason interrupted her and Yuri shook her head "Good, be a smartass when you have a better idea" He went back to his seat and started the car. "Tell me about her dream, everything you know"
"She .. she was in a balcony and she sees city lights but it wasn't where we were from, she kept saying that over and over again" Yuri tried to remember.
Jason takes out his phone and starts typing. "Okay, so according to the internet two years ago on the same day; there was a shooting in a bar, a guy marries a pizza, some political rivalry shit, suicide gone wrong and car accident kills married couple. Wow this is pretty dark"
"Go to suicide gone wrong" Yuri murmured.
"Why? That doesn't sound like Sasha" Jason remarked.
"Just click it" Something made Yuri anxious about it.
"Alright, hmm let's see. Okay Mr.Morgan's daughter Louisa Morgan tried commiting suicide but was rushed to Imperial Hospital in time where the doctors are currently attending to her. She would have bled to death if not for her father who caught lying on the floor of their .. balcony" Jason stuttered.
"What happened to her? Are there any more news related to the incident?" Yuri asked. Was that the only information regarding her attemped suicide?
"No just this one, atleast we know the hospital where she was admitted to. Let's go?" Jason says with such enthusiam but Yuri didn't have any.
"It doesn't make any sense, Dr. Nick said that .."
"First of all, this isnt science related. Dr. Nick said it himself. This is the only lead we have. For all we know Louisa might not even be Sasha" Jason stated.
"How is it that Louisa has no social networking. She isnt on Facebok or twitter. If only I could see how she looks like" Yuri needed just a bit of hope, anything to hold onto.
"Oh right, you know how Sasha really looks like, right?" Jason asked, probbaly because he wondered about it himself.
"The first time I saw her, I realized that she was the most prettiest girl I had ever seen. I don't think I could love anyone this much. She is honestly my everything"
"Then let's go find her. Im sure hospitals don't disclose information on their previous patients. But we will pull every string there is. My father is a powerful man and Dr. Nick will hopefully be willing to help as well. No matter how long it takes, we find her"
"This is insane, we are driving and looking for Sasha. Like she is a person, and she is out there somewhere"
"Yuri, as much as I always tell you to keep your hopes up, this time I just want to warn you, she might not be alive. It could .. it could have been her spirit this whole time" He might have been right but at the end of the day, what was anything without some hope?
"She was so full of life, Jason. That was no spirit, wherever she is, she's alive. And she is waiting for me"
- - - - - -- - - - - - - - -
Sasha's POV
"I .. killed myself" I muttered under my breath as I vanish. It should be pitch black, it should be the end. But it was all white. There was a white flash and I was in the hospital, at least my spirit was. I could see people, but they could not see me.
"I killed myself, didn't I?" I muttered again in disbelief. "No .. please tell me this isn't happening!" I scream.
"Oh god, please don't .. please please don't tell me I took away my life" I fell on the floor. "I met her .. I met the love of my life and even before I could actually meet her, I ended it all" I sobbed my heart away.
"WHYYYYYY .." I scream again. I was having a panic attack and I had no intention of calming down"WHY why why why .. What have I done?" I panic thinking about Yuri and the life I've lived.
"I want to live" I sat on the floor and whispered. "I want to live" I repeated. I closed my eyes and remembered her. Yuri Williams.
I would have done anything for her. She gave me a purpose. She accepted me for who I was, even though the strong and brave Sasha was not me. I was the weak one, the one that hurt the most. The one that lets the negativity get to her. I didn't like myself when I was Louisa.
But little did I know that in the future I grow strong, I become Sasha, the girl who is filled with positivity. I protect my loved ones, I do well in my studies and I have true loyal friends and I fall in love. And I gave all that up when I decided to end my life.
"So this was your sign?" I looked up at the hospital ceiling. "You wanted to show me how it gets better?" I cry out. "This was your way of telling me, ending my life was a great mistake?"
"You were right! Are you happy? YOU WERE RIGHT!" I screamed at God. Tears rolled down my cheek and I couldn't bear my disappointment."Please . . take back that night. Give me back my life. I would treasure it this time. I could take care of myself. And I would .. " I cried more. "I would never do something so reckless ever again"
"Please God . . " I begged.
Suddendly I hear the crash cart. I look to my left and I see my father. Joey Morgan, the man I left behind. I wiped away my tears out of confusion. What was he doing in the hospital? He had a bouquet of flowers in his hand and with the doctors he ran inside the patient room.
I quickly get up and follow them inside the patient room. The room was filled with red roses and snow globes. He knew I loved those. I stared at the doctor who pulled out the defribillator, out of focus I watched the doctor use the defribillator on me.
I was still in the hospital? For two years? I didn't understand what was going on.
I watched my father burst into tears. "Not today Louisa, it's your birthday"I had never seen my father cry, never infront of me but he was at the verge of tears "Come on, fight it honey"
"Dad I'm right here" I walked infront of him. Oh right, he cant see me. I looked back at my body that lay on the hospital bed, almost lifeless. I was here the past two years. I was in a coma for the past two years.
"You saved me" I look up again as if God could hear my voice. "You gave me my second chance" Well techincally third if I was to count how I was almost gone from Yuri's mind for five months.
Everything happens for a reason they say. After everything I've been through, who was I to decide to end my life just like that without knowing what life was yet to bring into my life?
Why did I choose not to bear the pain with my father?
Why didn't I think about how he could cope with my death, rather than how I couldn't cope with living?
Why did I have to be selfish and so ignorrant to how beautiful life could turn out to be?
Yuri couldn't have been a dream, she was as real as anything I have ever felt in my whole life. She was out there, and some day I will find my way to her but right now, I needed to find my way back into myself. I needed to apologize to my father who has been tending to me for two years, never giving up on me.
It was time for I, Sasha to be Louisa.
I walked towards my body and stretched out my hand. It didn't take long, but the minute I opened my eyes, it felt like I had woken up from a long long dream.
"Lou?" Dad called out.
"Dad .. " I muttered under my breath. It was so bright in the hopsital room, I could have gone blind.
"She woke up! Oh my god, hi hi baby girl" I felt dad's warm hugs.
"Where am I? What happened?" I was confused and my body felt weird. It was painful to move and it felt foreign.
"It doesn't matter. You're conscious"
"What happened?" I asked again.
"What is the last thing you remember?" The doctor asked.
"Err . . I don't know. I remember the balcony and . . oh god" I remembered the suicide night as if it was yesterday. How could I have done that to dad? I felt a pinch of guilt in my stomach and I kne wit'll never go away. Staring at my wrists I wondered why the scar was almost faint to see. "My wound is almost gone .. how long was I unconscious for?" I looked at everyone in the room, confused.
"What year do you think this is?" The doctor asked.
"2015?"
"It's 2017 now. You have been in a coma for two years. Despite many odds, you made it all the way back to your father. Looks like you've been given a second chance at life. I'll get back to you after checking your labs, till then I suggest Joey you better catch her up on a few things" The doctor grins and leaves.
"I'm so sorry . . " I begin but dad cuts me off.
"Oh shush, you are alive and okay and that's what matters the most to me. I will do everything in my power to make you come back from this, Lou. I knew you were sad, but I didn't know how much it was affecting you. We'll make it better together okay?" He hugs me again and everything instantly felt better. It was wrong of me to let it all go. Who knows the better days are yet to come?
Just about then, there was a knock on the door. The tall guy and a blonde girl enters the room. "Ahem, uhh we . . " The tall guy began stammering.
"Yes?" I watch dad lift his eyebrows in confusion as the girl and the boy run out of things to say.
"That's her" The blonde girl whispers. I heard that. We stare at eachother for what it seems like minutes until dad leans in.
"Are these your friends?" Dad asks uncomfortably.
I stare at them again, trying to recall anything. "No, I have no idea who they are"