Shut Up & Listen - Chapter 52: Chapter 52

[cole]
I stood in the middle of the street for two seconds. "Man fuck you!" I yelled at nobody since Dame had already sped down the street. "Fuck you too!" I heard someone yell in the distance, but I didn't see anyone. I fucking hate this area, ain't nothing but old dead buildings and stray fucking dogs out here. It'd be different if the abandoned buildings were at least boarded up, but naw, niggas be sleeping in there and shit. Folks be committing murders in them hoes and leaving the damn bodies there. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to call a Lyft but who the fuck is gone pick me up in this neighborhood? I took my phone out my pocket and boom, dead. I started walking hoping that I might be able to find my way to Oz house. As soon as I started to get comfortable with my situation, I heard a chain jingling. My eyes grew big and my chest started to hurt cuz I knew I was gonna have to run soon.
"God please, I swear if you send that dog to hell I will praise your name for the rest of my days. Please just let me get to Oz house safely without hurt harm or danger in Jesus name." I whispered a quick prayer and then heard barking that was definitely the voice of a pit Bull. Fuck! I started singing 'oh lord I want you to help me! Oooooh lord I want you to hellppp meeeee! Help me on my journey oh help me on my waaaay yeah, ohhh lord I want you to help me!" As I was catching my breath, about to sing the second verse, I heard the dog barking again and another dog joining in. I clenched my cheeks and looked around, scanning the street to see where they were before I kept walking.
Then I heard a loud laugh which made me jump and stand still, praying that it was only Lucifer trying to play tricks on me, "I rebuke you satan in the name of the father son and the holy ghost." I whispered before breaking out into a high speed walk. I for sure heard the sound of a heavy breathing rabies having ass loose pit running towards me from somewhere and then I saw headlights so I scooted to the side only a little bit because there was tall grass by me and there could be anything or anyone in there. My heart started beating faster. "Yo! Nigga!" I heard someone yelling after me and I started running. "Cole!" I was confused but I kept up my speed until the car was cruising beside me. I looked over hesitantly. The  vehicle stopped beside me with the window down revealing guess who in the driver seat. "I saw you hop out Dame pickup back there. Y'all having a fight or sumn?" I just looked at him. "Well? Get yo ass inna car lil dude." I put a finger up at him and started walking again with him cruising beside me. "That dog you was running from..." I looked behind me and sure enough, it was high tailing it across the street. I couldn't open the door fast enough.
"Where you going?" Lonnie asked, already having pulled off. "I was going to go to Oz house cuz it's the closest walking distance, but you can take me to my crib I guess."
"Do I look like a Uber driver to you?"
"Nigga you just asked me where I was going."
"Yeah... and you seem unsure. So imma just take you where I was going."
"And where's that?" I asked, not receiving a response. "Aight. You can let me out, dawg. I'm not bout to play witchu." I demanded. But still, no response. "Yo, YOU HEARD ME?"
"Yeah I heard yo lil chocolate ass."
"Then why you still driving?"
"The doors are unlocked. You can bounce whenever."
"Nigga you tryna get me killed. Why you getting on the freeway?"
"Just chill, my baby. What kinda music you like?" He asked, ignoring my whole uncomfortability with the situation. "You seem like you'a vibe to some erykah... you like 6lack? Nah... you like that old school shit huh?" He mumbled, scrolling through his phone.
I didn't respond because what the fuck is this dude on? The music came on and he put the volume on a moderate level. I immediately recognized the music before the lyrics and I side eyed him.
Didn't I treat you right, na
Didn't I
Didn't I do the best I could
Didn't I
Didn't I give ya everything
Didn't I
Tried my best just to be around
"Wow. You really in yo feelings 'bout sumn."
"Huh?"
"This shit right here..." I said,turning up the song so he could hear exactly what he was playing.
Didn't I do it baby
Didn't I do it right
Why you wanna leave me baby
Didn't I treat you right
He continued to ignore me and just sang along as if I weren't there, so I leaned back and got comfortable. I used to listen to this Darondo joint on repeat sometimes after me and Jill's breakup. Suddenly, my 'fuck you' attitude toward her was nowhere to be found as my mind went back to the convo I had with Jill the other day. At the time... I was really really angry and it was fuck her till the end of time. But, the more time I have to think about it, I just wanna talk to her and ask her why she did it. Why didn't she want to have a baby with me.
My mind continued to go down a rabbit hole thanks to the soul wrenching simp juice Lonnie was playing on the radio.
Lonnie turned the volume down a little bit and glanced over at me before looking back at the road. "What y'all fight about?" I gave him a confused expression.
"You and Dame. Why he throw you out?"
"He ain't throw nobody out, I opened the damn door and stepped out voluntarily."
"At four am. On Clairmount." He purses him lips, unbelieving. "Was it about ol deadbeat ass?" He asked before continuing.  "I tried to warn him about that nigga. Plus I figured he was gone say something to him about me being at the hospital. He think I'm a thug."
"You are a thug."
"Yeah. But that don't mean im a bad person."
"You saying you ain't?"
"You saying I am?"
It was quiet a few moments while I recalled all that has happened since Dame 'reacquainted' with his birth family. "Dame is too good a nigga to keep getting hurt." I said.
"Imma assume that you not talking about me. So What happened?"
"Ion know exactly. But seem to me like Dame been worse off since connecting with him. I ain't gone be the one tell him that though."
"Why not?"
Because he would just think I'm being jealous and bitter. I added on in my head.
"Why would he kick you out if he mad at somebody else?" Lonnie asked, moving on from the Maverik convo.
"He ain't kick me o-"
"Okay." He said, chuckling lightly. "So, why? You must'a been irritating him or sumn."
"Just focus on the road, my nigga." He listened surprisingly, and left me alone for a few minutes. Until he thought of something else to say.
"We still coo?" He asked, I assumed he was referring to what happened earlier. I got a little nervous at the feelings he made me feel earlier as they resurfaced making my ears hot. It's times like this that I really thank God that I'm team darkskin. I attempted to joke in the state I was in to redirect the conversation.
"Nah. Don't talk to me." I said, looking out the window.
"Say less." He said.
A few minutes later, we pulled into the driveway of a simple house in the suburbs of Troy. "Yo, who's house is this?"
"Mine."
"You don't live with ya pops?"
"I do. But I live here too."
"Troy though?"
"Nobody know me out here. I'm just some black dude. You coming in?" He said, nonchalantly. We went into the house and he disappeared into the back of the house returning with a towel and less clothes on.
"I'm bout to shower. I'll be right back." He said, closing the bathroom door behind himself.
"Wait. What am I supposed to do?" I asked, knowing he'd still hear me through the door.
"Nigga..." he said, dismissing me.
I sat on the couch for a few minutes, then I remembered that my phone was dead. I went into the kitchen then into a room near the bathroom. It was his bedroom. I snooped around for a little bit then went into the other room. It was set up like an office. Bookshelves lined one wall and in front of it was a desk, desktop, the whole nine but no phone charger. Who the fuck is this nigga. He walked in, standing beside me with a robe on. What in the fresh prince of bel-air is this dude on.
"What all the books for?" I asked, trying to keep my mind off of the fact that he was most likely naked underneath that robe.
"Reading re re. What you don't read books?"
"Not my thing."
"So what is yo thing?"
I shrugged my shoulders, looking around the office some more.
"I thought Jah followed you everywhere."
"Look. I'm bout grown as hell. Don't you think it's bout time fa me to have my own shit?" He said, coming up behind me reaching around me to grab a book from out of my hand. "And don't touch my shit dude." I turned my head and our lips almost touched making me back up. I cleared my throat and started walking towards the hall.
"You ever bring Cobe here?"
"Nah... I just got here a few months ago. Why?" He asked. I thought bringing Cobe up would make me stop thinking about Lonnie's extremities, but no luck. I decided to change the subject to something less related to Lonnie.
"You know uh... my my phone..." I nodded my head, "my phone is dead. You got a iPhone charger?"
"Nah. I don't have a iPhone. I can take you up the street to get one though."
"At 5am?"
"In the suburbs... there's this phenomenon called open twenty four hours. Apparently niggas don't steal that much out here."
"That's cuz it ain't no niggas out here." I laughed.
"It's niggas everywhere you go... at least one."
"Yeah bro, that one nigga is you."
"You want that charger or nah?"
"Yeah... my girl flying in in a few hours. I wanna check in, make sure she get here safe and everything."
His face sort of turned sour as if he just bit into a bad apple.
"What?" I asked, noticing his sudden change.
"I just... I ain't know you had a girlfriend." He said. I shrugged.
"Everybody know I got a girlfriend."
"Okay? Lemme go ahead and get dressed." He said turning down the hall to his bedroom.
___
We got in the car and Walgreens wasn't too much more than five minutes away from his house. "You got any product on you?" I asked.
"You gone pay me? I don't do that free shit." He mumbled, still not really having changed much from the earlier conversation. Good for me but still uncomfortable.
"Yeah, nigga."
"Aight, i gotchu when we get back."
As soon as I returned to the car, I plugged my phone up and within seconds my phone lit up with the Apple symbol. Flooded with messages from Cobe and Jemaika and Geoffrey, but nothing from Dame. Damn, he really threw me out and ain't even check if I got home safe. I unlocked my phone and Lonnie just so happened to be looking over and noticed my wallpaper which was Jemaika. "She fly as hell, dawg. You know she live here?" He said, slight excitement present in his face.
"Duh boy, that's my girl."
"Oh, you know her? How?"
"I was on her spring tour."
"Nah...." he shook his head in disbelief.
"What? You ain't know?"
"Know what?"
"I'm kinda do music, my nigga. I mean I'm just breaking in for real, but like I'm nice, actually." I said, my best attempt at a humble brag. We know for sure that I'm a little better than nice 😜
"Nah..." He said again. "You lying. I know you lying."
"I ain't, you wanna meet her? You like a fan or sumn?"
"Hell yeah I'm a fan, nigga. You really know her forreal?"
"Yeah! Why would I be lying, dawg."
Back at the little house on the prairie, Lonnie is handing me a blanket while I'm getting comfortable on the couch. "Woah... wait I'm not sleeping over, nigga? Soon as my phone charge good, I'm getting a Lyft and dipping."
"Why? You don't wanna chill?" He asked, a little bit of hurt in his voice.
Long silence.
"You just a little confusing honestly." I said.
"How so?"
"I can't figure yo ass out. Like one minute you cool as hell, the next you threatening niggas lives, then in another you molesting niggas in public and shit. Ion fuck with dudes who got mental illness and shit dawg, I mean is Cobe crazy? Hell yeah but I knew him before the nigga became crazy you know? But you a-
"I'm not crazy. I'm Lonnie and I'm Black. That's two different people. You just so happened to have experienced both. Take what you will from that."
"I ain't taking shit from that cuz that don't explain what happened earlier."
"You mean our talk about Cobe? I hope you was listening."
"I heard you loud and clear and that's why it can't happen again. I don't even get down like that."
"You don't get down like what?" He smirked making Cole feel insecure in his statement. I sat up.
"Just don't come at me like that again, aight." Lonnie furrowed his brows and came closer to Cole and sat on the couch beside him.
"Why not?"
"Cuz I said so."
"No I mean... what's really stopping you from kissing me right now? Cuz it ain't yo lil girl friend obviously since you got a whole nigga on the side." My stomach flipped at how close he was and I tried my best to keep from making eye contact with them big brown eyes that I know where focused on me at the moment.
"Self control. I said I ain't gone do it and imma keep my word." I breathed out.
"To who?"
"Mind ya business, Black." I took a deep breath and scooted over a little bit.
"Ohhh... I'm Black now? Trust me, you don't wanna be talking to Black right now." He spoke with a deeper, more menacing voice than he was just seconds ago.
"Oh yeah?" Cole said, chuckling, playing the fool, finally looking him in his eyes.
"Yeah, nigga. Cuz Black don't take no for a answer. I wont it I got it." He barked, making me squirm a little bit, but keeping my composure on the outside.
"Maybe that's what I want." I mumbled to myself as I looked down across the room at any random thing.
The way he looked me up and down made me think he heard me. I looked back at him and his face was blank, but I could tell that his mood was changed. He reached behind me got his pack of cigarettes off the coffee table and never looked back at me.
"Gone head and get yo Lyft, lil dude." He said, dismissing me as he walked away into his room and shut the door behind himself. Fuck.