SIYAASAT - Chapter 40: Chapter 40

After few days
Swadheenta.
I'm walking in the corridor thinking about what happened in the past few days. I have done everything but Rehan is not ready to listen to me and why would he? Everyone is against me and no matter how much I tried no proof proves me right. It's like it was a game that Maharani played on me and then everything vanishes.
If I think from another point of view it makes sense that a stepmother wants to kill him but why would his Dadi and Father support her?
One day I created a scene because I never saw Maharaj's name tattooed on Maharani's left hand so I thought maybe this helps but guess what she has his name written on right hand.
In a few days, I tried every sort of thing and everything proved me wrong. Now I'm so frustrated that I want to clutch my hair and bang my head on the wall.
What do I do? Ma ko call karu or bolu ki Sass pareshan kar rahi hai lekin kya bolungi ladai is wajah se nahi ho rahi ki mene sabhi me tel zyada daal diya ya agan me jhadoo nahi lagai. Balki ish wajah se ho rahi ha ki vo apne bete ki jaan ke piche padi hai.
[ Should I call Ma and will say mother in law is troubling me but what will I say the fight is not happening because I put more oil in curry or I didn't clean the floor but the fight is happening because she is behind her Son's life]
Not only this, whatever happened is weakened my relationship with Rehan. We hardly talk now, the moments of our laughing, teasing and spending time with each other flew in the air.
Suddenly I bumped into someone and found it was Rehan.
" I'll talk to you later" he cut the call and look at me.
" Where are you looking at? Are you walking with eyes closed?" He scolded.
You can also see I wanted to say this but I didn't because I don't want to fight.
" I bumped into you deliberately " I grinned at him, he raised his eyebrow.
" Your highness is so busy that he can't spare time for his only Queen, I'm so hurt," I said dramatically.
" Ho gya? Now let me go" he walk past me but I held his arm stopping him.
[ Done?]
" What?" He turned back.
" Can't you spare some time for me?" This time I asked seriously.
" I'm busy"
" That's what I'm listening to past few days, I'm busy. Do you realise Rehan even after staying under on roof we hardly saw each other and sometime we get in the night it's passed in... " I close my eyes sigh " I want to spend some time with you, I want you to talk to me, ask me how I'm? Did I eat something or not? If I'm happy or not?"
" We eat together so why do I ask and about you happy or not what do you need you're the Maharani of Madhavgarh what thing is missing?"
I want my husband.
" And what about talking?" I gulped down trying to control my tears.
" What about talking? You talk only one thing which is against my mother"
" Ha toh jo sach hai vo nahi bolungi"
" Again" he groaned walking away.
Swadheenta what you did!
I run towards him and grabbed his arm with my hands he look down at him.
" We won't talk about your mother, we will talk about something else" I look up to him hopefully.
" Like?"
" Like weather, it's so nice today let's go for a walk-in garden," I said excitedly.
" Really? There is so hot outside"
" Koi nahi, we will do something else" I try pulling him but he didn't budge from his place.
" What?" I asked him.
" Don't you think you have become so clingy?" I stare at him.
" You always seek attention now I thought maybe you create all the drama to seek attention" my grip on his arm losses and I take steps back.
" You think this?" I asked slowly before he could answer his phone rang and he went to attend to the call.
I start walking he really thinks that I'm doing this all for attention. I sat down on the stairs wrapping my arms around my legs. I put my head down.
What I'm asking just sometime? Is it too much to ask?
What I want is that he at least asked me what is wrong? Why did I put accusation on his mother?
I want him to listen to me.
My phone rang and I picked it up.
" You forgot about your brother right?" Bhai's voice came.
" There is nothing like that"
" Then why didn't you call me"
" I was busy Bhai, becoming Queen and all is so tiring I hardly get time" I lied to him.
" Queen, wah behena "
" My wedding date is coming closer will you come to my marriage or not Queen of Madhavgarh" Bhai teased me.
" I'll Bhai I'm missing you so much"
" I'm missing you too"
" Bye"
I didn't realise when I start crying.
" Is your husband upset with you?" I heard Maharani's voice and I found her standing beside me. She raises her hand and wipes my tear.
" Your tears are so precious Rajkumari don't waste them" I jerk her hand.
" Don't touch me"
" You're my daughter in law I can't see you like this so I tell you the truth" she sat beside me.
" Your husband for which you're doing all this doesn't love you, even if you die trying he won't glance at you" I glared at her.
" Don't you dare try to create a misunderstanding between us" I warned her.
" I'm not I'm only saying the truth if you don't believe me find out yourself" I raise my eyebrow.
" He is only using you and if you don't believe me try to say no to him" I glared at her.
" Nothing like gonna happen and what do you think I'll listen to you, never" I get up and goes.
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Night
I'm sitting on the bed against the headboard and looking at Rehan who is busy with his phone. The things Maharani said are roaming in my mind as much as I don't want to believe them I am afraid that it's might be true.
I turned off the light lamp and lay down on the bed facing the wall. I close my eyes and try to sleep but I'm not able to fall asleep.
I feel the bed deep beside me and I feel Rehan's hand snaking around my waist pulling me closer to him, he was close enough that I feel his hot breath on my neck.
His hand move on the curve of my waist and I close my eyes.
" He doesn't love you"
I shook my head and focus on him his hand moved towards the knot on my nightgown pulling it open. He pulled down the sleeve and I feel him kiss my shoulder.
" He will not even glance at you after he lost interest in you"
His hand move from my shoulder to my bosom.
"He is only using you"
Suddenly I placed my hand on top of his stopping him.
" What happened?" He whispered in my ear.
" I'm tired let me sleep," I said closing my eyes.
" What! In the afternoon you were complaining that I didn't give you time and now I'm giving you the time you're showing tantrum" he said angrily making me angry as well, I turned towards him.
" I didn't ask about this time, I asked some time to talk"
" Really what do you want to talk about because last few days you were talking about one thing only"
" That's because I care about you but you, on the other hand, don't even think about me, you said I'm seeking attention, asking for some time is seeking attention? " I sat up facing him.
" Did you even once ask why I said that? There must be some reason behind it I'm not making stories, did you?"
" Did you ask how I feel when you slapped me in front of everyone, didn't I feel humiliation, didn't I feel anger, sadness and pain but still I'm here telling you one thing over and over again but still you're not ready to listen to me"
" Did you even once ask? What happened Swadheenta? No, you didn't"
" If I ask for some time I'm seeking attention"
" Am I only a doll to you? Who works according to your wishes and didn't have feelings of her own"
" You're making it a big issue"
" I'm making it a big issue" tears welled up in my eyes. " I don't want to talk to you," I said and lay down facing the wall.
I close my eyes and buried my face in the pillow suppressing my sobs.
Humara rishta kamjor ho raha hai or me kuch nahi kar pa rahi hu.
[ Our relationship is getting weak day by day and I'm not able to do anything]
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Afternoon
I'm still laying in bed. I thought he'll apologize or try to talk but nothing like that happened.
I don't know what to do? What is happening? Why everything is against me?
" Maharani ji, it's time for lunch" I heard a maid say.
" Man nahi hai," I said and again buried my head in the pillow.
[  Don't want to]
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Evening
I'm standing on the balcony looking outside at sunset.
" Rajkumari" I turned and find Bhabhi beside me, I smiled a little.
" I heard you haven't eaten anything from the morning," she asked me.
" Man nahi hai" I look back outside.
" What happened?" She placed her hand on my shoulder.
" Ghar ki yaad aa rahi hai"
[ Are you missing your home?]
" It happens with everyone, something I too miss my family. A girl came leaving her home and make her husband home her's but it isn't easy. I know you're feeling alone"
" But everything will get alright " we talked for more time and it makes my mood good.
I'm going towards the dining hall when I saw Maharani is making Rehan eat something. It can be poisonous my eyes widened and I run towards them. She was going to make him eat when I grabbed her hand and eat it.
Paneer ki sabzi.
" What is this behaviour?" Maharani asked angrily and everyone stand up, I chewed then gulped down.
" Hmm it was nice par thoda or chatpata hota toh jayada accha nahi hota, next time put more spices" I sais to Maharani.
[ It's nice but if you have put more spices it would be nice]
" You can't eat, it was for Yuvraj," she said angrily.
" Why?" I cross my arms across my chest.
" Because it was for Yuvraj"
" So what if I eat it"
" I made it for my Son"
" So your daughter in law can't eat it, this is wrong you're biased"
" Enough, hum pareshan ho gaye hai apki badtameeziyo se, " Rajmata said.
" Thanks, Rajmata Ma used to call me this now I feel like home"
" Are you seeing your wife's behaviour?" Maharaj said.
" Yes, yes he is seeing everything you guys drama" I point towards Maharani " her fake tears " I turned towards Rajmata " your fake concern, everything"
" Enough Swadheenta" Rehan said through clenched teeth grabbing my arm.
" No" I remove his grip from my arm.
" Why don't you ask your family to stop the drama" I turned towards them.
" Drama a mother's love looks drama to you?" Maharani asked.
" Yes, it is you are more good in drama than me"
" I just want to ask for how much time you'll continue your drama c'mon yr I'm tired now " I look at Rajmata " aap toh sabse badi hai juth bolte hoye hue apko sharam nahi aati kuch saal baad bhagawan ko jabab deyengi aap"
" Dekh rahe hai aap Yuvraj Rajkumari ne ab Rajmata or Maharaj ko bhi nahi chora" Maharani said to Rehan.
" When everyone is involved why would I take one person's name only"
" Wow you didn't put poison in curry"
" You think I'll mix poison in his food," Maharani asked like she is so innocent.
" Anything can happen" I stand against the table rotating the knife which was laying there.
" You accuse all of us but what if you're the one who is behind Yuvraj's life" Maharaj raised her eyebrow, I chuckled.
" Kyuki Ma suteli hoti hai biwi nahi" I lean forward and said in a husky voice.
" Why will I kill him? Everyone does something because they have the motive and your motive is crystal clear"
" Swadheenta you have done enough," Rehan said.
" No I have not done enough they have done enough tell them to stop this kyuki ab na mera dimag kishak raha hai ishe pehle ki me kuch kar du sach bol do" I threatened Maharani.
" Yuvraj she is threatening me in front of you and you're standing there looking at everything" I close my eyes looked down again her drama started.
" Humne apko god me khilaya hai, or yeh kal ki aayi bol rahi hai aap humare bete nahi hai"
" Hum apse kitna pyaar karte hai"
" Ap par karoch bhi aati hai toh humari jaan nikal jati hai"
She continued saying I'm trying to control my anger but it snapped. I grip the knife and pulled her arm wrapping my arm around her neck I place the knife on her neck.
" Swadheenta"