Sold to the Night Lord - Chapter 74: Chapter 74

A hand grabs my shoulder and pulls me aside from the rest. I’m about to scream when I see the hazel eyes of my brother.
“Can we talk?”
“That depends.” I cross my arms beneath my chest. “Are you going to keep acting like a jerk, or will you behave like a decent brother?”
He bites his lip and rubs the back of his neck with a guilty look. He glances over my head, though it’s obvious our family isn’t nearby.
“I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry I was such an idiot to you,” he sighs. “I’ve been completely irrational and childish. I couldn’t understand how my sister, who always spoke with such visceral hatred toward these creatures, could be comfortable among them.”
“You think I have a choice?” I snap. “This is what my life is going to be, Silas. I’ll always be surrounded by vampires—if I’m lucky enough not to die first. At first, I resisted so much it was exhausting just to breathe.”
“You can’t let him think he’s won.”
“That’s the thing, Silas.” I grit my teeth. “He won the moment he bought me. Whether I like it or not, in everyone’s eyes I’m his—to feed him, to serve him, to be broken if that’s what he wants. No one will stop him, especially not him.”
“Promise me your resignation has nothing to do with your heart.”
I frown.
“Does what I say mean anything to you?” I say, annoyed. “You don’t seem to listen at all. This has nothing to do with feelings, Silas. It’s about survival.”
He has no idea how much I’ve resisted, what I’ve been through these past weeks, what I’ve seen, what I’ve suffered.
It’s so easy to talk and demand when you sleep in your own bed, with the people you love nearby, with the certainty they’ll still be there in the morning.
Meanwhile, I sleep in a castle full of cold rooms, suffocating loneliness, and no guarantee that I’ll live to see the next day.
Besides, I’ll never admit that a flame is starting to burn inside me—one that goes beyond hatred. He constantly accuses me, but has he wondered if this goes beyond me, if it affects more than just me? I don’t think it’s one-sided. Cassian’s kisses and his attentions certainly don’t say so.
“I’m sorry, Elara.” Silas throws his arms around me, holding me tight. “I’m sorry for being a jerk. I just can’t accept that you’re not with us anymore. I’m sorry you ever thought I didn’t want you to be happy. Just, please, don’t forget about us. I don’t.”
I feel my eyes fill with tears and blink them away.
“I’ll get you out of here someday. I promise.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” I whisper.
“I’ll find a way to keep it.”
We pull apart, and although everything seems resolved on the surface, I can’t forget his words so easily. It’ll take time to forgive him fully.
We rejoin the others, careful not to touch any of the flowers—you never know which one might kill you. Abigail’s laughter lights up my soul every time Drystan makes a funny comment. I watch my parents’ shoulders visibly relax when they see their daughter is happy and that the man accompanying us is not as monstrous as they may have thought. No, the worst monster of all is in his chambers, probably deciding how he’ll make me pay for what happened between us. Because, of course, in his eyes, it’ll be my fault.
More than once, I catch Evanora watching Drystan. It’s amazing how neither of them has noticed yet that they look at each other when the other isn’t watching.
After walking through the hedge maze and every corner of the gardens—including the tree I used to enjoy reading under—we go back inside for some snacks. No one wants to say it out loud, but the moment to say goodbye is near. It’s best they leave before night falls. The roads are never safe in the dark, unless you’re traveling with a creature worse than the humans who use the night to prey on travelers.
The banshee and the vampire disappear at some point, leaving me alone with my family. I gather my courage and take a deep breath.
“Abigail, come here,” I call, taking her hand as she approaches. I bend down and cradle her against my chest. “Did you like this place?”
She nods her head.
“Good, then remember I’m okay here. Don’t keep worrying about me. None of you should.”
I look at the others as I speak.
“I’m still alive, but I don’t want to be a ghost living with you in that house. I want you all to go on with your lives, please. I’ll try to make one here. Abigail, you need to play with other girls, fall, scrape your knees, learn to read, fall in love, get your heart broken—or break a few by accident. Silas, you too. Stop thinking about how to get me out of here and start truly living. I know we’ve all been frozen in time these past years, with my fate hanging over us. So now that you know I’m okay here, please—live.
Dad, Mom, I don’t want you to be sad. I know it’s a bit selfish to ask. I saw it in your eyes when you arrived—you’ve been mourning me in silence. Don’t keep doing that. Not for me.”
“Elara…”
Mom struggles to hold back her tears, and I can see the shimmer in Dad’s eyes. Abigail has her face buried in my chest, her shoulders shaking with sobs. And then there’s Silas, who seems in pain just looking at me.
Don’t cry.
Don’t cry.
Don’t cry.
I repeat it to myself, knowing I can’t let that be the last image they have of me. This is a real goodbye. We won’t see each other again, and I’m not naive enough to believe fate will decide to cross our paths once more.
They all come closer, surrounding us with their arms. I think they break around me—I’m the only one capable of keeping the tears at bay. I don’t know how long I’ll be able to hold back my emotions before they explode.
Someone clears their throat behind us.
I blink several times to chase away the tears before turning and coming face-to-face with Cassian.
We haven’t seen each other since what happened yesterday, and I’m almost sure we’ve been avoiding each other on purpose.
He’s wearing a loose black shirt that reveals the pale skin of his chest and leather pants that match his gloves.
He looks away from me, as if it’s painful to look at me.
“The carriage is outside,” he announces.
My family clears their throats and discreetly wipes away their tears while Cassian turns and assumes we’ll follow. I cling to my sister’s hand, and Silas reaches blindly for mine. We descend the stairs slowly, Cassian staying behind us.
“Will you write to us?” Dad asks.
“As often as I can,” I reply, not knowing if it’s even true.
“Take care of yourself.” Mom hugs me again. “And don’t do anything that might put you in danger.”
I catch the double meaning.
Don’t make him angry.
Dad and Mom are the first to get into the carriage, taking Abigail with them, who looks at me with tear-filled eyes.
Splinters are lodging into my heart with every goodbye.
Lastly, Silas wraps me in a tight, engulfing hug.
“Forgive me,” he whispers over the top of my head. “I didn’t want to spend these days being a jerk to you, and I ruined everything. Forgive me—and don’t forget my promise.”