stardust | park seonghwa - Chapter 26: Chapter 26

"JUST, promise me that first."
"Yeah, yeah okay, what is it?"
Yeji gulps. I can feel that she's having an internal debate, trying to talk herself out of this - whatever this is - but she scoots the stool closer. Yeji stops right in front me, our knees touching.
She turns around so that she has her back to me. Then I hear the long rattle of her zipper and I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous right now. She stops halfway and pulls down the left side of her jumper.
There, on the back of her shoulder, was something no longer undeniable. My hand pulls away the fabric of her sports bralette to have a better look at the whole thing uncovered.
It's bright red, mixed hint of purple. Magenta, it seems. With the red and the magenta was a shimmering swirl of dark green. It almost glows under the rays of sun, speckles of white decorating around the blue-ish white centerpiece. It's beautiful, I think to myself, reading the word 'amare' underneath it.
"Yeji, when...?"
She brings her jumper back up, zipping it tightly and turns around.
"The party," she answers.
"The party?"
Yeji nods, "it was after you left and oh God if I'd known that I'd get it there, I wouldn't go?"
"Why? Yeji, what happened?"
All my cautiousness around her evaporates with one look in her slightly anxious face. I can tell her hesitation, there was never a problem in reading someone as open-book as Yeji.
With an exhale, Yeji confesses. "I didn't want to know who my star mate is," she tells me, in a voice dripping in honesty. "You know what I'm like, being tied down to one person scares me."
"But you don't have to be together with your star mate, don't you?"
"Even then, Hyeshin, having it means that there's still someone out there for you, literally your other half - you were made of the same star," Yeji plays with her fingers, "and even if I'm not, it'll be like I'm cheating on them. Like, I know it's not if I'm in no relationship with them but it technically, celestially is."
"I was so scared of that, you know, ever since I learned about these things," she continues, "you know what else scares me?"
I shake my head.
"What if my star mate doesn't like me?"
"That won't happen, you know star mates have a natural pull towards each other. They will never hate you," I say.
"But what if they do!?" she protests, almost standing on her seat to emphasise her point.
I flinch slightly at her rising tone.
Yeji sits back down, shoulders slumped as she lets her head drop. She rests her elbows on her knees, as if she's trying to make herself seem smaller. This isn't like Yeji, it's not like her at all.
Then again, things like that tend to get either the worst or the best of your emotions. Yeji seems to be in a lot of distress from it.
"You're not telling me something," I state sternly.
The girl in front of me lifts her head, many emotions ripple in the warm tones of her dark coloured eyes. There's a sense of uncertainty in her silence, which I understand - I can one hundred percent understand. Topics as such is a little sensitive to talk about; girls like Yeji are the type to move on and go but there's something.
"Ji-Ji, do you know who your star mate is?" I ask her, a little more softly this time. I can feel myself internally grimace at the nickname I used to call her, but when her emotions shift, I tell myself to just let it go.
I'm half expecting her to say 'no'. Which would make a lot of sense - the party was a place where a lot of people gather. Considering the fact that it's a crowded space where a lot of people had to bump, squish and weave themselves in and out of the sea of bodies, it would be no surprise if her star mate had only brushed her hand by accident.
If that had happened, her chances of finding her star mate were lower than the chances I know myself have. Who knows how many people she's squished herself through that night? It could be ten, twenty, thirty... and any of them could've been her celestial partner.
That seems logical enough for a reason why she's so pressed about this.
Because once you've learned you've gotten your mark, there's a natural urge, almost like an instinct, to find your matching star.
At least, that's what mum told me. (Sometimes it makes me wonder if Yeosang's genuinely really given up on his own star mate).
However, what Yeji reveals to me isn't what I expected. A look of disbelief decorates my facial features.
"Yeah," the tone in her voice tells me she's sure of it. "Yeah, I do."
"Then why are you here?"
Of course, I feel some type of jealousy stirring up inside me. I'm not sure whether it's the fact that Yeji knows who her partner is or that she has one and that she's found them. Although I'm sure it's the former.
Yeji lets out an exasperated sigh. "Because!"
"Because I know my star mate doesn't like me."
"What do you mean?" I'm confused now.
Another sharp inhale is taken by her before she gazes right in my eyes. "It's Wooyoung."
I furrow my eyebrows.
"Wooyoung?"
"Wooyoung," she repeats after me, sounding as if trying to get the word into my head. "He's my star partner."
"Wooyoung!"
"Shh!" Yeji lunges forward in her seat, alarmed, as she slaps her palm over my mouth, "not too loud! San is right outside."
I nod. The girl relaxes back into her seat and crosses her arms, looking at everywhere but me. She clicks her tongue.
When I try to speak, Yeji quickly brings up a hand to stop me. "Before you say anything," she interrupts, "yes, Wooyoung is my star mate and I met him at the party."
"And it's annoying 'cause I've never met him until that night but he's already playing in my head so much," she confesses, "we don't even know each other very well. I don't think we know each other at all. He only knows my name and that's it. I got attached way too quickly, it's ridiculous!"
"And Wooyoung, he hates me," Yeji quite visibly deflates, exhaling in defeat, "and I just - I don't know. It hurts."
"I'm sure he doesn't hate you," I try to assure her.
My hands hover around the air awkwardly as I don't exactly know where to place them, trying to still keep my distance from her but she just looks genuinely troubled. So I place one on her knee, rubbing it soothingly.
Yeji lifts her head to send me a slightly pained smile.
"Talk to him," I tell her, "how could he dislike you for no reason?"
She presses her lips tightly, shaking her head. "I tried," she mentions, "I mean, we were just fine when we talked at the party but after I went to the bathroom for a while and came back, he didn't want anything to do with me."
"Something must've happened in between, but I don't remember," she adds, "I tried approaching him again, even asked around for his number - which and made me sound like an obsessive fan or something since he's older than me from what people have been saying -and stalked people's Instagram's just to get his."
Yeji pauses in the middle to let a chuckle slip past her mouth, sounding as if she's ridiculed at herself.
"And I heard he's a friend of yours... please tell him to answer my texts or something," she's almost sounding desperate now. I bite my bottom lip. "I at least just need to know why he's like that, it's fine if we go separate ways after that."
I let myself fall into a calculating silence. The Hwang Yeji is actually pleading for something, letting a little of her polished pride slip a little - it's a bit absurd.
Of course, I'm still a little stung by what she did but she means no harm... right? Maybe I'd overreacted a bit and made it seem bigger in my head than it really is.
But she made you uncomfortable.
Still. It must've been a one time thing last time, right?
She almost harassed you!
But nothing happened to me after all. San was there and it was all good.
This time, Yeji's intention was purely on trying to ask me for help. To talk to Wooyoung, to talk to her soulmate. Ask him what went wrong and she even said that she's willing to let him go afterwards.
There was one thing about Yeji and that was she never got herself too caught up in emotions. But once she did, she's tangled and to hear that from her makes me think twice.
"Alright," I decide, "I'll try to convince him, talk him round."
"You know, it's funny because some time ago I was with him and he implied on having a star mate," I tell her, "I didn't expect it to be you."
"I honestly didn't even expect to find my soulmate at all," Yeji shrugs.
"Oh and again, I'm sorry for, you know, the party," she apologises, "if it caused anything between you and Seonghwa, I'm sorry for that too. Your friend, San, I'm glad he was there."
I offer her a small smile.
"He's your soulmate isn't he? That Seonghwa?" Yeji continues to question.
"You're very curious."
She chuckles a little, "sorry, old habits die hard. You two are a great match though, honestly. I don't know what came over me that night. Maybe I thought I still had a chance? I don't know, but I'm glad you have him."
My cheeks start to warm and I rub the back of my neck awkwardly, "yeah, I - thanks. I didn't expect you to say that."
Yeji laughs, that same melodious one as the one back in high school. "No, thank you, Hyeshin... really... for doing this," she then stands up from her stool and brushes the back of her thighs. "I've got to go now, Hyunjin's waiting for me."
Of course, as always, Hyunjin will wait for her. That didn't change either.
"Apparently he found another good comic library and wants to take me there to see it," she snorts at her brother as she pulls the stool back to its original place, "can you imagine? Me reading comics?"
I twist my face in amusement. "No," I say, "no I can't."
"Exactly!"
"Shouldn't you hurry up then?" I watch her as she almost trips over the easel, "he's going to be annoyed at you."
"Yes, I should, thanks again Hyeshin."
With that and the swish of her elegant red hair, she's out the door.
I go back to my sketching with wide eyes, still in disbelief. Did that really just happen?
San strides casually into the room again soon after, his bottom lip sticking out as he walks in. "What went on with her?" he asks, pointing at the door with his thumb, "she looked satisfied."
I shake my head, "it's nothing."
"Hyeshin..."
I give San a reassuring smile. "Trust me, Choi San."
"It's not nothing but I know you'll tell me soon enough," the blonde blows his mouth and rolls his eyes.
"Okay, San," I hear myself snicker. I guess he's right though, I'll probably end up telling him anyway.
"So, where are you with the penguins?" I question as I tilt my head to look at my near finished sketch on the canvas.
San voices a small 'oh!' before going on a fact vomit about how penguins mate and how they keep their chicks warm in Antarctica.