TAMING THE PLAYBOY ALPHA - Chapter 106: Chapter 106

: RAINSTORMS AND CONFESSIONS
FREYA'S POV:
The sky came falling afterwards.
The light pitter-patter echoed in the air as the droplets fell onto the once dried earth and rooftops, creating this sort of foggy white background noise that drowned out everything around me...
Including the sounds of my tears.
I feel a sense of calmness and safety, knowing if I burst into a wail, my screams would be muffled by such sweet and soothing sound.
And the grey, dull and gloomy sky perfectly depicted the mess of emotions swirling within me.
For the first time, I admit defeat.
Since my birth, life had clearly waged some unwarranted war over me by making me an Omega and just when I manage to talk myself out of an abusive home and find something akin to love and happiness, things are ripped from my grasp without mercy.
So, I give up... you win.
I lost.
"Freya?" Xena calls from the door leading to the inner parts of our room, where it's probably warm and cozy.
But I prefer the cold, chilly and partially wet balcony.
The feel of the gentle whipping wind across my face is therapeutic.
I hear her footsteps grow closer till she's standing right next to me, but I don't bother looking up.
"I brought you some tea." She whispers softly.
Maybe she fears that I would break into tears again if her voice even peaks just a little bit, or she feels guilty again...
I don't know.
She puts the glass mug with an amber green liquid in my field of vision so I can take it from her.
I solely reach up from her hand and take it, feeling the warmth of it slide up my hands. The light foggy steam is still evident atop, and I instantly know it's from the kitchen.
"It's chamomile to help you relax."
Ah, hopefully it puts me into a deep slumber for weeks.
I really just want to sleep this whole thing and put it behind me. Still, my eyes refuse to close, and there's this tightness in my chest that makes it even harder to breathe lying down.
The reason why sitting out here had been the best choice.
Xena doesn't walk away once the warm cup is in both my hands. I wait for seconds, but she remains there like she has something to say.
I can't help sighing internally.
"Freya, I..."
"If you're going to blame yourself, don't. I don't need that right now." I say.
I know I sound a bit too cold now but I can't bring myself to care about anything right now, or deal with the wave of emotions that comes with her worrying.
I hear her swallow down the words afterwards, but she still doesn't leave.
"You're right... Are you okay?"
"I don't know."
"I'm sorry this happened to you." She begins again. I can hear the strain in her voice.
"Xena-"I try to stop her before she begins, but she doesn't let me.
"No... really, I am. Whatever it is you want to do next, be sure that I'm going to support you, even if it means overthrowing King Darius."
"Isn't that treason?" I raise a brow at her indirect suggestion to overthrow the current Monarch.
"Well, whatever it is, I'm down for it. We don't need boys and their drama. And if you ever feel too single, I'm right here. We can move in together and adopt puppies."
Regardless of the black hole in my chest, I smile, then burst into a slight chuckle. Her words, though simple, comfort me. I know I would be okay somehow and having her by my side gives me a bit of assurance.
She moves closer, hugging me tightly out of nowhere. I'm taken by surprise at first, not expecting the contact but eventually become grateful for it.
It's right when we're about to pull away that we hear grunting and soon enough, an arm shoots up from the ledge and Adam pushes himself upwards before finally letting himself fall onto the ply floors of our balcony.
"Adam?" I say from surprise, seeing him jump to his feet, dusting a few specks of debris from his very casual attire.
He's dripping wet, which makes his curly dark hair fall effortlessly longer than usual, covering a bit of his eyes. Right now, he looks like a shaggy dog.
"Oh... hey." He responds as though he wasn't expecting to see the both of us out here.
"What are you doing here, and out in the rain?" Xena asks as shocked as I am to see him sopping wet and dripping all over the floors.
"Uh... taking in nature?"
"Right." She responds dryly, not buying his response.
She shakes her head, turning to me, suddenly looking too tired for anything.
"I swear, Freya... you have the weirdest friends."
"You do realize you're one of them, right?" I remind her.
"Whatever... I'll go get you a towel I'm not going to use anymore." She says, looking him all over.
It's clear she feels enough discomfort from just watching him stand right there in wet clothes.
She shakes her head in disapproval while walking into the room.
His eyes follow her till she goes in before his eyes sparkle suddenly, and he rushes up to me.
"How was it?" He asks.
I know what he's referring to, but I shift away from him just a bit, not to be splashed with some water.
He notices my discomfort, taking a step backwards.
"Sorry." He apologizes before taking off his shirt in one swoop and squeezing the water out like it's a sponge, giving me a full view of his chest. Wide, bronzed and hard.
He's as whipped as most guys in this school are with a much bulkier body. I had noticed. But seeing his specs up close was nothing compared to what I had concluded.
Thick glistening packs that seemly pulsed with power, and the thickness of his upper arm...
Damn.
I look the other way, instantly feeling my cheeks flush just like that. My wolf growls at me angrily for even finding him remotely attractive while we were still healing from Silas' rejection.
He looked good, but of course, Silas is better.
"How was the talk with Silas?" He asks again. This time, I respond with cold silence. The soft sounds of the showering rain fills in the quiet space between us instantly. I can't even look him in the face.
Grateful that he had tried to give us a chance to talk, but still feeling pathetic with the way it ended. "Not good, huh?" He concludes.
"He said he pitied me. That's why he went out of his way to find me, out of sheer pity." I say. The words come out strangled and twisted from the ball rising up in my throat again, just like it had when
I narrated the whole thing to Xena earlier. "Of course, I don't believe it, but I don't understand why he would do this." I sniffle, rubbing the tears gathering in my eyes again.
Adam falls onto his knees quickly, so he can reach my level, wiping the little drops of tears falling down my face. "Hey hey, it's alright." He says so softly, brushing against my cheek in the softest way.
I realize Adam is sweet... too sweet to me, and I don't know why.
I look into his eyes again, holding back my sob.
Brown and soft.
"It's his loss, okay? Whatever reason he has doesn't matter anymore. You gave him a chance." "But it's just so hard. I feel like a huge chunk of myself was ripped out." I try to explain, but it's worse than that.
I feel a deep emptiness that's like a black hole, sucking every single thing in. I feel this heavy weight pressing down on me. I feel tired, exceptionally tired and hurt.
Like my very essence is broken.
"Why do I feel this way? We haven't even dated and yet, it's like nothing makes sense anymore without him." I explain further, losing myself in thoughts. Somehow, that arrogant bastard had weaseled his way into my heart and engraved himself in it, and I was stuck with the aftermath.
Adam pulls me in for a hug. His body is wet and gross right now, but I don't reject the offer, sinking into him.
My face just grows a bit red, realizing my bare cheek is on the hard muscled chest of his.
I slowly pull away? rubbing at my already sore eyes.
"Thank you for being here, Adam. I know you went through all this trouble to help me, and I'd hate to trouble you even more."
I offer a small smile, looking up at him again. "I don't mind it." He smiles back but then, there's that seriousness in his eyes. The same one he's been spotting for a while.
"I don't want to take advantage of your care." I push.
"It's alright. You can take advantage of me and take everything else with it."
"Adam...?" I say with a raised brow.
He's been more cryptic than usual with that look shimmering even brighter in his eyes. "I like you, Freya."
My eyes widen in shock. I unconsciously move back, only slightly, to look at him properly.
A part of me is dazed and in disbelief. The other...
nagging on me that I had seen the signs... "I like you, and I know you're still caught up on Silas and this is probably the worst time to bring up a confession but here I am; I like you." Suddenly, I feel claustrophobic and enclosed in the smallest of spaces that I cannot breathe.
I rise to my feet, putting a little more distance between us.
"Adam, you already know what's going on right now.
I'm going through a lot, and I just can't handle your feelings right now." I half yell now.
"I know, it's okay if you can't. I'm not asking you to handle them, or let go of yours. Just....use me, Freya, however you want to without holding back. If you want a punching bag, I'm here. Or a hug, I'm here too."
He jumps to his feet frantically but maintains the distance between us respectively.
I'm even more confused.
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that for now, I'll be whatever you want me to be for you. I'll wait till whenever you're ready to open your heart again, and if you never do, that's fine. I just want to be close to you." "Adam..."
"I mean it, Freya... I like you."