Teach Me to Please | Please Me #1 - Chapter 23: Chapter 23

Harder, harder, harder.
Faster, faster, faster.
I groaned.
"It's not coming off!" I threw my sponge back in the bucket.
"No! I think it's making some progress!" Rya defended. I knew she was lying for my benefit.
We were currently in my garage, scrubbing off the spray-paint – well, attempting to. It wasn't really working.
"We've been at this for hours!" I complained. "We've barely scrubbed off anything!"
"Don't be so negative, it'll work!" we had poured tonnes of soaps together to create, in Rya's words, 'the ultimate soap', and got several sponges and buckets of water, even a freaking mop, to try and clean this shit off.
And it still wasn't working.
"I'm so screwed!" I sighed and wiped the sweat off my forehead. Luckily, my parents were out of town visiting my uncle and weren't coming back till next week meaning we had a good few days till this car had to be spotless.
"How mad do you think your dad's going to be?" Rya cringed. God, I could imagine the look on his face.
"He had his eye on this car for ages and finally got it last year. He's going to be so upset." I'd be the worst daughter ever, in other words.
"Why did you decide to drive his car? I could have given you a lift."
"Because," I began. "He was out of town and I haven't been out on the road in ages! It was just one time and look at how I've fucked it up."
I leant back on the hood and ran a wet hand through my hair.
"How were you supposed to know Leah would do something like this? How did she even know that this was your car?"
"She probably spied." I mumbled. A worry came to mind. "Shit. What if she knows that –"
"She won't." Rya quickly cut me off. "And even if she tells everyone, who the hell will believe it. You've not spent your whole life building up this platform for her to come and knock it down, trust me on that."
I sighed in relief, a worry still lingering in my gut but not as big as before. "Thanks."
When Christopher said we better watch out, I didn't think anything like this would happen. I guess I shouldn't have underestimated what a bitch Leah could be. That meant Christopher must also know what a bitch his cousin is too. Must run in the family, I guess.
"What I don't understand is why Adam would let her do this when he knows that –"
"I know." I sighed again. "I didn't pin him to be this low." It sucked. No, it sucked more than sucked. It fucking power vacuumed. I just prayed Adam looked like a fucking idiot when Leah's true nature was revealed and comes crawling back to me. Whether I decide to take him back or not will be up to how I feel.
In one way, I felt like an idiot for still having feelings for him, but then I remembered our time together. Sure, we were on and off, but that didn't mean we weren't friends in between. Even when we were on a break and I needed him the most, he was there without a single hesitation. He became more than a boyfriend or a friend, sometimes he became a lifeline.
And now he's cut me off for dead.
And it hurt.
"Hey." Rya touched my shoulder. "Look, my mom knows a guy at the auto shop that can have this cleaned in no time."
"Yeah, but it probably costs –"
"Don't worry about the cost." She waved it away. "It's your birthday next week, consider this my early B-day present."
I felt a knot tighten in my throat and I tried to hold back my tears. "It's too much."
"It's never too much for a best friend."
I flung my arms around her and kissed the side of her head. "Rya McCoy you are a fucking angel. Thank you so much."
She chuckled and hugged me tighter. She pulled away and smiled sympathetically. "It's okay! Now go!" she waved me off. I gave her a look of confusion. "Don't you have a tutoring session to get to? You better clean yourself up and catch the bus before it leaves."
Shit. I told Roman that I needed to push our session back a couple hours tonight and, thankfully, he said it was okay.
I hugged Rya one more time before rushing up to my room to fix myself up before running to catch the bus that would take me straight to 42 Acacia Drive.
❦❤︎❦
The sun was near to setting by the time I arrived and rapidly knocked on Roman's door.
Yet when the door opened, a naked chest stared back at me. It was Roman. In a towel. Just a towel.
Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
"Sienna." His eyes widened and he stepped back a little. His hair was wet and combed back and he wasn't wearing any glasses. I didn't mind Roman with or without glasses, but sometimes I really missed them when he didn't have them on.
Maybe you have a kink for glasses?
Is that even a thing?
"I-I didn't think you were coming." He confessed.
"I said I was." I replied. Did he really think I was going to stand him up? That kind of hurt.
"I know. It just... it was getting late, and I just assumed that –" I brushed past him and let the warmth of his living room embrace me like a cosy blanket.
"Roman, when I give you my word, I mean it." I said a little bitterly. He thought that I stood him up.
I listened as he closed the door and turned to face me. My pulse hammered like crazy just staring at his near-naked body, the towel hanging low on his hips. God, help me now.
"Let... let me go get dressed." He quickly said and rushed upstairs. I was left in the living room trying to calm myself. I pulled at the neck of my top and closed my eyes, allowing myself to take a deep breath in and a deep breath out.
When he returned, he wore a simple pair of grey sweatpants and a white T-shirt with some weird science joke on it. His hair was tied back into a mini bun and his glasses rested on his face. In his hands he held a few sheets of papers I assumed was for me.
However, for some reason, I felt like all the air had been pushed out of my lungs. I couldn't explain why but as I looked at him, I found it hard to breathe.
"Are you okay?" he asked. I shook myself out of whatever trance I was in and nodded.
"Yeah." I coughed. "Yeah."
Turns out Roman had made me another worksheet as well as another step-by-step guide. He recommended for me to put the steps onto flashcards and study that way to make sure I remembered them well. He even gave me a cute stack of them in the colours pink and yellow. That was sweet.
They're flashcards.
It's still sweet.
I was busy working on a question, trying to ignore Roman's gaze burning into my head. He didn't have a book or any homework to keep him distracted, so he stared at me, and I couldn't help but feel like I was burning in a blazing spotlight under his profound eye.
"Can I ask you something?" he then spoke. I looked up; the breath knocked out of my lungs once more.
Jesus, what was wrong with me?
"Um, sure." I replied.
"Why is it you didn't like the textbook?" I furrowed my brows. "The 6th Grader's textbook." Oh, that piece of shit.
"It's, erm... complicated." I looked back down at the worksheet. "I don't think you'll get it."
I felt him shift in his seat and rest his forearms on the table, clasping his hands. "Try me."
I looked up to be caught in his gaze once more. I swallowed down the knot in my throat and took a deep breath. "When... When I look at the textbook, it makes me feel so stupid."
"Why?"
"Why?" I chuckled. Nope, he wasn't going to get this. Roman didn't know what it felt like to feel stupid. There was no point.
"Sienna," he called out. "I... I just want to understand."
I just want to understand. He's not going to judge you. He just wants to understand you.
I took a deep breath once more and stared down at my hands in my lap. "I don't like to be weak." I admitted. "And this whole tutoring thing makes me. I-It makes me feel so stupid and small and... weak. So, when I see the 6th Grader's textbook, it makes me realise how stupid I actually am and how this weakness is more than just a weakness; it's a downfall. My downfall. I've spent my whole life building up a world, being up this version of myself I want everyone to see. Then I look at that textbook and suddenly it all falls. A-And I am nothing but a dumb, little girl in a world that I don't think will ever truly get me anywhere."
The knot in my throat tightened and my breathing became choked. I could feel the tears pooling in my eyes, glazing over my sight.
Don't cry. Don't cry.
I've already shown another weakness to him, crying would show another. I can't lose it. Be strong, Sienna.
I didn't dare look up. Didn't dare see his expression. I couldn't face it, and that made me all the weaker. It all just spilled out and I couldn't help it. I don't think I've told anyone that - how it all honestly felt. It was so canid and raw that I felt my shell crack and I was terrified for him to see the small, lonely and frightened girl worriedly hiding inside.
A hand grabbed mine and held it softly. I looked to the side to see Roman, he had moved from his chair over to where I was, crouching down to my height so our eyes met perfectly. He took my hand and held it in his before his other hand tenderly cupped the side of my face.
"You're not stupid." He whispered certainly. "You are anything but."
I looked down at the floor and whispered back, "You don't have to say that to make me feel better."
Both of his hands cupped my face and lifted my head to look at him. His blue-grey eyes swirling like pale sapphires in a storm of silver clouds.
"I'm not."
I had never felt my heart beat so fast in my entire life. "Why?" I choked out. Why wasn't he taking this opportunity to knock me down? To put himself on top. To make me revel in my weakness. I couldn't understand it. The whole school was out to knock me down, even though they didn't show it, I could feel it. I could feel the jealous stares, I could feel the people fantasising what it would be like to be in my shoes, to watch the popular girl have the sick downfall she deserved.
His thumbs brushed across my cheeks tenderly. "Because I can see through it all. I can see whatever you're trying to hide and I'm not afraid of it. I will look at you, and I will always see someone who is strong and there isn't a number of weaknesses you can show me that will ever make me believe any different."
His face was so close I could see every silver fleck flickering in his iris, every freckle peppering the soft skin of his nose, the slight crease in his forehead as he became oh-so serious, the tiny scab on his bottom lip I assumed he got from boxing. I could see it all, and the scary part was, there wasn't a part of it I didn't like.
I pressed my forehead against his and took in a shaky breath. It felt like there was no time in the world as he kept me there, so close to him I could practically feel his pulse jump out of his skin. In a move of pure boldness, without a single thought running though my head, I pressed my lips to his in a soft kiss. It was like one of the first kisses we shared. Just a kiss. No pressure, no sexual intention, no desperation. And, as much as I hated to admit it, it became my favourite kiss.
He kissed me back with the same gentleness, taking his time in allowing his lips to linger on mine, delicately savouring the softness, letting whatever was happening around us fade into a blissful nothingness.
I wrapped my arms around his neck as we kept kissing, taking our time. He parted my lips with his tongue and explored my mouth, his hands falling to my hips when he picked me up and I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist.
Our kiss turned passionate. Tongues caressing, hands traveling, our breathing picking up to form small, satisfied noises. He placed me on the table and stood in between my legs. Our lips never left once.
My hands trailed to the hem of his shirt and brushed the hot, bare skin underneath. I listened to his breath hitch and sighed into his mouth as the entrancing feeling of his warm hands snaked to my thighs, massaging them, opening them further so he could get closer.
I wanted him. Whether it was just going to be this kiss or whether we escalated to more, I wanted whatever he would give.
The lock clicked by the front door and we immediately pulled away as the voices belonging to his parents echoed in.