The Alpha's Gamble - Chapter 6: Chapter 6

Landon hooked his finger in my mouth and guided himself to my lips.
“It’s nothing you haven’t done before,” He said.
The sound of our moans bouncing against the walls in the backroom pulsated in my head and I remembered it like a nightmare. He filmed us fucking to hold it over my head. After everything we’ve been through, he sunk lower than he ever had.
I felt him against the back of my throat, and he fisted my hair to go deeper, pressing my lips against his shaft.
Harder.
Faster.
The sloppy sound of his precum lubing his cock as I rested my hands on his thighs was the only sound I could hear now- that and our moans echoing from the speakers in his phone which he held in his hand.
My scalp was burning from the strands being pulled between his fingers and he put pressure on the back of my head to enter my mouth all the way, enticing my gag reflex which coerced a pleasurable groan to rumble from his parted lips.
I dug my fingers into his skin and closed my eyes.
“Eyes on my, baby.” He ordered.
I looked at him, a rush of loathing filled me from top to toe as I kneeled on the ground while he fucked my mouth. Not even when I didn’t hate him did I enjoy sucking him off, it was one of those things he’d run to his side whores for and I didn’t mind, better them than I.
Feeling the little bit of self-respect I had left slip onto the ground under my knees, I wondered: Would it be the worst thing if he showed it to anyone?
It would start a rumor; I was used to those. Life couldn’t get worse than it already was. My thoughts died when he picked up speed with his fingers tightening in my hair and his cheeks flushed as he came in my mouth.
“Ahh fuck!” he groaned and thrust a few more times to empty himself before he pulled out.
Landon pinched my chin and forced my head back.
“Good girl,” he praised. My lips folded under his thumb and the little mascara I put on was burning in my wet eyes.
After getting dressed and raking a satisfied hand through his hair, Landon walked back to the party, but I couldn’t move. I couldn’t be bothered to think about standing as I sat and kneeled in the same position where he left me.
We didn’t have the perfect relationship, I’m not even sure you can call it a relationship but there was always a healthy blend of respect and attraction with the occasional hatred and fucking misery.
The grass and sticks shifted beneath me when I rose, and I looked toward the house where he would be. I must’ve looked like a mess, and I couldn’t have people asking me questions. I had to get cleaned up before anyone saw me.
Fuck.
The ground felt like water when I walked back to the house. Luckily no one saw me when I passed around the back but I caught the blinding beauty of Logan as he raised his glass to Landon who was pulling a shirt over his head.
Breathe, just breathe, and clean yourself up.
it wasn’t the degrading that bothered me, that was a part I was used to. I did it to myself constantly- it was the blackmail, the tape that could shift everything around me and throw me down on my ass, I’d rather go down a cliff.
I hurried inside the sliding door and made sure the blinds were drawn as I dragged the back of my hand across my lips.
The taste of him was still there, no amount of soap would scrub that off.
I opened the double fridge and grabbed a stocked water bottle. The kitchen was dark and empty. Quiet.
So quiet that when I closed the door and saw the black silhouette standing behind it I dropped the bottle and staggered back into the island.
I hadn’t heard anyone come in and why the fuck would he stand there like a shadow in silence?
It was only polite to announce yourself when you entered a dark room. Do you know why? Because you won’t scare the other person into a fucking heart attack.
“Noah,” I said and clutched my chest. Holly shit he scared the crap out of me but I chuckled lightheartedly and smiled, thinking he would do the same.
But Noah stepped closer, still hidden by the darkness, and leaned across me slowly- my heart was thumping against my ribs, and it didn’t relax until he pressed the switch under the cabinet.
The lights above us shone bright spotlights down on his face and I found myself longing for the darkness.
If he was intimidatingly big in the dark shadow he cast, the light didn’t do anything to calm me down. His rough features were on full display: his thick brows hunched together and his piercing dark eyes dripped with something, but what was it? It wasn’t joy, no I don’t think he knows what that is.
It wasn’t fear, people feared him, animals too, he feared nothing as far as I knew.
The emotion remained uncyphered when he stepped closer and cocked his head. The black t-shirt clung to his broad chest and large biceps, stretching whenever he moved.
“Where do you think you’re going?” his dark voice rippled through the air and conked me back to life.
There was an authority in his tone, whether he meant it to be or not, it was there, and I answered to it for some fucked up reason.
“To my room,” I said meekly.
Shit.
I hated when I sounded weak, and I rarely ever did.
“I thought Logan told you what the deal was for today?”
Squeals and sloppy kisses pushed through the room when they slid open, sending in the warmth that the others were playing in, and I couldn’t mistake the laughs piercing my ears. Everyone was out there drinking and having fun and here I was, numb and pissed off at the same time, and for some reason, my voice felt that this was a prime opportunity to lose the sarcastic drip I had depended on for years.
The sun outside was bright, annoyingly so, but the blinds were drawn so that people wouldn’t think about coming inside.
“I did!” Logan smiled, “Didn’t I tell you we’d bust your door down if you tried to hide away?”
This fucker. The girl on his lap was vigorous, touching and kissing and licking every inch of skin she could come by.
Logan shifted his head to give her more to taste and I gritted my teeth to keep the vomit down.
“I wasn’t-“
“First,” Logan cut me off, “admit that I told you,” His words were slow and rough, like I was a fucking child he was coaxing an admission from.
“Yes, you did,” I seethed.
My face was heating up and I could feel the blood rushing up to my face, tinting my cheeks and revealing the rage I felt under my skin.
“I wasn’t going to hide away; I need to wash up. So, if you excuse me,”
Noah stepped closer and followed my steps, blocking my exit and his bastard brother chuckled behind us.
“You don’t look dirty,” he said.
I feel dirty. On the inside.
But that was none of his business.
“Just move!” I demanded the beast blocking my road.
His lips tugged upward at my command. This wasn’t a joke, and I could feel my strength slipping little by little. I needed to go, lock myself in the bathroom, and just…be. That’s what I did when shit went sideways, that’s how I coped. Not by opening up and discussing it around the table with a cup of tea or with a therapist like my mother always told me to do. She loved recommending the bitch she went to in the human town one hour away after my dad left us.
No way in hell was I pouring my feelings out into a suited human’s notepad. For her to judge me and look with condescending pity at the girl who was falling apart.
Noah took a step and his eyes shifted over my face, stopping to burn a hole into my skin below my eyes.
“You’ve been crying?” like he cared.
A girl behind me squealed and I turned to see what was happening, but Noah’s fingers dug into my chin, and he pulled my head back.
“What happened?” his voice was low and gruff.
There was no sentiment in his voice, it wasn’t like a person who cared about what had happened, no, this was more like a man who didn’t like being in the unknown and needed every piece of shitty information. Probably to keep in his arsenal in case he’d need it one day.
Noah wasn’t the enticer of the group, but he was the one they all turned to for approval, for the green light…for a sign that they could act on their demented thoughts. No part of me believed he didn’t know what Landon had done. Of course he did, nothing happened without his consent.
His fingers digging into my skin were sending waves of displeasure and anger surging through my nerves, it gave me enough strength to pry his hand off and slap it away.
“Move out of my fucking way!” I slammed at his chest and stormed past him.
I hurried up the stairs, the sound of footsteps closing in behind me raised my nerves to an all-time high but my door was right there. I ran, burst through the door, and slammed it shut before locking it in all haste with shaky fingers.
“Fuck,” I breathed against the door. I swear to God, my heart was about to fracture my ribs and leave a hole in my chest.