The Alpha's Gamble - Chapter 76: Chapter 76

NOAH
I cleared out the closet and made room for Maddie’s things.
Not sure what more I can do to make her feel comfortable here, but hopefully it’ll do, at least until I figure out a solution to whatever the fuck is going on in her head.
I keep replaying my father’s explanation about the symptoms a vessel will show before they gain their wolf. The signs of weakness that ultimately mean they’re not fit to carry a creature as strong as the one they get. Having a wolf is no small feat.
That’s a lie. Most of the time, it’s easy. The norm is that you get your wolf, and you basically become one. You share a mind, emotions, hopes, and thoughts. You’re never quite as close to anyone as you are to your wolf. Maybe your mate, but even that, finding that one special person created by the goddess to fulfill the parts of you that are missing, is rarer than not being able to handle your wolf. Maddie was an anomaly. My eyes grazed over the dark walls and the armchair in the corner by the bathroom, where I’d helped Maddie undress when she was wounded.
Watching her hug herself was hard back then, but now I realize it was her way of comforting herself. No one ever did it for her, so she had to find a way to protect herself. To care for herself.
To calm herself. Fuck. My hair is still damp from the shower as I rake my fingers through the thick strands and grip a fistful, pulling it while I squeeze my eyes shut to try and erase the memory.
But it’s futile.
The pictures of her are burned into my skull.
“You okay?” I turned and saw her standing by the door, bags in hand and eyes round as she scanned my face.
“I’m good.” I grabbed the worn fabric handles on her bags and placed them by the closet.
“Yeah?” She was staring at my back while I unpacked her things, and I smirked.
Maddie’s never shown worry for me before. It was doing fucked-up things to my heart.
“Yeah,” I said, glancing over my shoulder at her. I put her clothes on hangers, folded others into the drawers I’d emptied earlier. My own shit was crammed into the other closet, a chaos I rarely allowed when it came to my space.
I liked things tidy, neat. A place for everything, and everything in its place.
But watching her sit on the foot of the bed, dragging her eyes over the room, somehow made it okay to live in chaos. As long as she was here.
“You’re softening for her,” Onyx mused.
“No, I’m not.”
“You’re right. You’ve always been soft for her.”
“Go sleep,” I said and shoved him back. His laughter echoed in the dark as he retreated. I tucked the bags into the corner of the closet and closed the doors, knowing she’d want things organized and clean.
“Do you need anything?” She looked at me, her face bare of the shields she’s depended on for safety for God knows how long. It was just her now. Her and me. And she let me see it all.
Maddie was exhausted. She was scared. And I didn’t know how to help her.
“Thank you.” The words were soft, a whisper, and she smiled. Or at least, she tried.
She rose and circled the room, tracing her fingers over the pictures on the shelves, the books, the small collection of memorabilia I had. Most of it belonged to my mother. A lot of her things were discarded after her death, guess that was my father’s way of dealing with it.
When Maddie picked up the snow globe with a picture of Logan and me inside, her lips twitched in a smile. He got that for me when he was four. Refused to pick anything else. The sucker was sweet when he was a kid.
“About the tape,” She shook the globe, flakes of glitter fluttering around the photo and falling softly toward the bottom. That’s how it felt, like I was falling softly, about to hit the bottom.
I took a step, steady and strong, but inside, I was shaking like a leaf.
“What about the tape?” Fuck, I hated how calm she was, every movement slow and precise.
Confidence is good. But not when she wore it like a shield, thinking she knew what she was dealing with. How could she have found out? It was all speculation. It had to be. No one would’ve told her.
And if she only thought she knew, that meant there was still time. Room for me to change that.
Thinking isn’t the same as knowing. You could always sway a thinker.
But when she turned around, there was something in her eyes.
A calm, unyielding knowing that made my heart sink.
“I know it was all a game to you. You were never going to help me get rid of it.” She knew, I knew that she knew, she had told me already. There was something else, a new revelation that she was about to share.
She cocked her head, searching my eyes. When I felt my walls slipping under her piercing gaze, I scrambled to piece them back together. But where it was easy with everyone else to keep them out, Maddie was different. I couldn’t shut her out. Somehow, with every crack she’d made, every touch, every taste...
She wasn’t on the outside anymore.
That girl had slithered her way in, and I didn’t know how to shield myself from her anymore. But it wasn’t her I wanted to protect by hiding the truth, it was myself. Because once she knows, I’m fucked.
“Please, stop.”
The baritone rumble in my chest came out more like a plea than a command.
“You knew about it, didn’t you? That Landon was filming us in the club. That’s why you came to get him. You distracted me while he grabbed the phone.”
No…
A tired laugh crackled from her lips.
“You’re good at hiding your emotions, Noah. But your eyes are screaming the truth.”
“Don’t.” I took a step forward. Maddie’s eyes hardened. Memories of everything that had happened since the night in the club flickered across her face, like she was finally piecing it all together.
She lifted a stiff shoulder, her chest sinking in a sigh.
“You played me.”