The Alpha's Gamble - Chapter 85: Chapter 85
You are reading The Alpha's Gamble, Chapter 85: Chapter 85. Read more chapters of The Alpha's Gamble.
NOAH
It was the way the wheels set in motion behind his eyes, lulling a story I’m sure he’s thought about every night for the past twenty years. Some of the pieces fell into place when I looked through my dad’s neurotic documents with dates, names, bloodlines, age, and strength— not to mention their most prominent weaknesses as well as where in a formation they would best be suited in case of war. For Trevor, he wrote: Strength and endurance suggest a high level of training in the former pack. Perhaps a close second to the leader. Fit for lead. Head warrior. Test SEAM.
SEAM stood for: strength, endurance, agility, and motivation. Everyone was tested and then ranked and positioned where they would be most useful. Trevor scored in the top league with strength, endurance, and agility, but motivation was where he lacked. He was fit to be a lead trainer, not a warrior. He never fought unless absolutely necessary. A man without motivation is not dangerous, he’s nothing. He’ll lay his life down easily and perform if he has nothing to fight for.
The odd thing was that despite the compulsive documentation my father kept, nothing was written about Trevor’s past. Not which pack he belonged to, the family he had, or why he left them.
I had a few pieces, but not enough to get a clear picture.
“I came here as a twenty-three-year-old, after having left everything behind. Jack was kind enough to accept me into the pack and, as I’m sure you noticed, he respected my wish to have no traces of the past in the documents.”
Obviously. But why? No one wants their past erased unless they’re hiding something.
“Did you kill someone?” I asked bluntly.
“Noah,” Maddie gasped, but then she turned her head and raised a brow. “Did you?” she asked.
Trevor shook his head.
“No, nothing like that. A day came when I had to take on a responsibility that I thought I was ready for, even though I had dreaded it most of my life.” Maybe that mask covering his face is enough to fool his daughter, but I saw the crumbling excuse of a man underneath.
“Your strength, the way you challenged my father in his home.” I moved away from Maddie and searched the ruins of broken pieces on his face.
“Only someone of high rank can confront another and not be intimidated by the presence of an Alpha.” I continued. “You fought him. Not only that, but you held equal force and show of dominance, and backed down only when you chose to, not when you were told to.”
“An Alpha is the only one who can hold his against another.”
Trevor stuck his chin out and tightened the knot of his fingers.
“Or the son of one,” he said.
All I heard was Maddie’s gasp, and she placed a gentle hand on my arm. I thought she was using me to stay balanced, but when she pressed me to the side to get closer to her dad, I realized that I wasn’t even on her mind right now.
“How is that possible? You’re so—” She folded her lip between her clenched teeth and stopped herself, but Trevor gave her a subtle smile and added up the words for her.
“Because I’m so weak?” She was silent, but the way her shoulders rose and she cocked her head spoke volumes.
That was precisely what she was thinking, what everyone thought. Trevor had never shown much strength other than on the training field or in the gym. Raw physical form is a drop in the ocean compared to every other attribute a man should have, especially a father— and he hadn’t proven himself to have mastered any of them. Not even tried to. Trevor let Clara pull his strings, the puppeteer to his marionette, and he flimsily moved through life under her direction.
Judging by the looks of it, it wasn’t a surprise to him that his daughter found him weak. I’m sure he’s reminded of it every time he looks in the mirror.
“You’re not wrong,” he said. “Growing up in my old pack, I was always trained and taught the importance of leadership and respect. The pack before anything. A pressure I was prepared for my whole life; camp, training, leadership, it was all routine by the time I was ten, but it always felt… wrong.” The mask was falling, he was rubbing circles around his fingers. I heard the blood rush through his body.
“When I was twenty-three, my father died in battle. No one expected it— hell, I didn’t think he would die until he was a hundred, and he would never pass the title down to me until he was physically unable to stand and do the work himself. Everyone turned to me, some even prepared to challenge me.”
That’s it. Tell us the truth. Tell us how you tucked tail and ran from your home, left your people and adopted a new name to play the worst fucking game of house anyone’s seen.
“What did you do?”
When Maddie asked that, I couldn’t help the dumbfounded expression I shot her, and she shook her head.
“No, I mean, did you just leave your pack? Everyone who depended on you? People who had already lost a leader and who looked to you for a way to carry on?” A pack without an Alpha is chaos in its pure form.
“Yes.” His answer was thickly coated with shame.
There were so many fucking things I wanted to scream in his face, how pathetic he was. How, even though he left behind a pack that depended on him and got the chance to start over, he still managed to fuck up. And now he wasn’t the only one affected. All of his inadequacies poured over Madeline, and she grew up having to fend for herself when her father was right there!
“I’m not telling you this for sympathy.”
“Don’t worry,” Maddie said and moved her head left to right. “You’re not getting any of that here.”
Sure, my own dad wouldn’t be getting any awards for parent of the year, but he made sure to always teach us the fundamentals: courage, strength, and heart. He said it was the recipe for a good leader, and made sure that Logan learned the value as well.
Our mom handled most of the child-raising, but when she passed, Dad did what he could to keep everything afloat by training us harder, instilling discipline, and teaching us how to read a lie in someone’s eyes and smell betrayal and disloyalty from a mile away. And then at night, after his duties were done and he couldn’t hide behind the mountain of work it took to lead a pack, he’d retreat to his office and shut the door.
“Which pack did you run out on?” Maddie crossed her arms, most likely listing every pack she knew of in her head to see which one her dad could’ve been the leader of. Then again, if Trevor hadn’t run off and sought shelter here, Maddie might’ve never existed. So a part of me is pretty fucking grateful he’s a spineless coward.
“The Timber Pack.”
Fuck my life.
It was the way the wheels set in motion behind his eyes, lulling a story I’m sure he’s thought about every night for the past twenty years. Some of the pieces fell into place when I looked through my dad’s neurotic documents with dates, names, bloodlines, age, and strength— not to mention their most prominent weaknesses as well as where in a formation they would best be suited in case of war. For Trevor, he wrote: Strength and endurance suggest a high level of training in the former pack. Perhaps a close second to the leader. Fit for lead. Head warrior. Test SEAM.
SEAM stood for: strength, endurance, agility, and motivation. Everyone was tested and then ranked and positioned where they would be most useful. Trevor scored in the top league with strength, endurance, and agility, but motivation was where he lacked. He was fit to be a lead trainer, not a warrior. He never fought unless absolutely necessary. A man without motivation is not dangerous, he’s nothing. He’ll lay his life down easily and perform if he has nothing to fight for.
The odd thing was that despite the compulsive documentation my father kept, nothing was written about Trevor’s past. Not which pack he belonged to, the family he had, or why he left them.
I had a few pieces, but not enough to get a clear picture.
“I came here as a twenty-three-year-old, after having left everything behind. Jack was kind enough to accept me into the pack and, as I’m sure you noticed, he respected my wish to have no traces of the past in the documents.”
Obviously. But why? No one wants their past erased unless they’re hiding something.
“Did you kill someone?” I asked bluntly.
“Noah,” Maddie gasped, but then she turned her head and raised a brow. “Did you?” she asked.
Trevor shook his head.
“No, nothing like that. A day came when I had to take on a responsibility that I thought I was ready for, even though I had dreaded it most of my life.” Maybe that mask covering his face is enough to fool his daughter, but I saw the crumbling excuse of a man underneath.
“Your strength, the way you challenged my father in his home.” I moved away from Maddie and searched the ruins of broken pieces on his face.
“Only someone of high rank can confront another and not be intimidated by the presence of an Alpha.” I continued. “You fought him. Not only that, but you held equal force and show of dominance, and backed down only when you chose to, not when you were told to.”
“An Alpha is the only one who can hold his against another.”
Trevor stuck his chin out and tightened the knot of his fingers.
“Or the son of one,” he said.
All I heard was Maddie’s gasp, and she placed a gentle hand on my arm. I thought she was using me to stay balanced, but when she pressed me to the side to get closer to her dad, I realized that I wasn’t even on her mind right now.
“How is that possible? You’re so—” She folded her lip between her clenched teeth and stopped herself, but Trevor gave her a subtle smile and added up the words for her.
“Because I’m so weak?” She was silent, but the way her shoulders rose and she cocked her head spoke volumes.
That was precisely what she was thinking, what everyone thought. Trevor had never shown much strength other than on the training field or in the gym. Raw physical form is a drop in the ocean compared to every other attribute a man should have, especially a father— and he hadn’t proven himself to have mastered any of them. Not even tried to. Trevor let Clara pull his strings, the puppeteer to his marionette, and he flimsily moved through life under her direction.
Judging by the looks of it, it wasn’t a surprise to him that his daughter found him weak. I’m sure he’s reminded of it every time he looks in the mirror.
“You’re not wrong,” he said. “Growing up in my old pack, I was always trained and taught the importance of leadership and respect. The pack before anything. A pressure I was prepared for my whole life; camp, training, leadership, it was all routine by the time I was ten, but it always felt… wrong.” The mask was falling, he was rubbing circles around his fingers. I heard the blood rush through his body.
“When I was twenty-three, my father died in battle. No one expected it— hell, I didn’t think he would die until he was a hundred, and he would never pass the title down to me until he was physically unable to stand and do the work himself. Everyone turned to me, some even prepared to challenge me.”
That’s it. Tell us the truth. Tell us how you tucked tail and ran from your home, left your people and adopted a new name to play the worst fucking game of house anyone’s seen.
“What did you do?”
When Maddie asked that, I couldn’t help the dumbfounded expression I shot her, and she shook her head.
“No, I mean, did you just leave your pack? Everyone who depended on you? People who had already lost a leader and who looked to you for a way to carry on?” A pack without an Alpha is chaos in its pure form.
“Yes.” His answer was thickly coated with shame.
There were so many fucking things I wanted to scream in his face, how pathetic he was. How, even though he left behind a pack that depended on him and got the chance to start over, he still managed to fuck up. And now he wasn’t the only one affected. All of his inadequacies poured over Madeline, and she grew up having to fend for herself when her father was right there!
“I’m not telling you this for sympathy.”
“Don’t worry,” Maddie said and moved her head left to right. “You’re not getting any of that here.”
Sure, my own dad wouldn’t be getting any awards for parent of the year, but he made sure to always teach us the fundamentals: courage, strength, and heart. He said it was the recipe for a good leader, and made sure that Logan learned the value as well.
Our mom handled most of the child-raising, but when she passed, Dad did what he could to keep everything afloat by training us harder, instilling discipline, and teaching us how to read a lie in someone’s eyes and smell betrayal and disloyalty from a mile away. And then at night, after his duties were done and he couldn’t hide behind the mountain of work it took to lead a pack, he’d retreat to his office and shut the door.
“Which pack did you run out on?” Maddie crossed her arms, most likely listing every pack she knew of in her head to see which one her dad could’ve been the leader of. Then again, if Trevor hadn’t run off and sought shelter here, Maddie might’ve never existed. So a part of me is pretty fucking grateful he’s a spineless coward.
“The Timber Pack.”
Fuck my life.
End of The Alpha's Gamble Chapter 85. Continue reading Chapter 86 or return to The Alpha's Gamble book page.