The Alpha's Gamble - Chapter 89: Chapter 89
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MADELINE
When I tell you that I tried to come up with a reasonable explanation for Onyx not being able to sense Nasha, I tried my fucking best. I tried hard because I wanted Noah to lay this to rest, not wanting him to become obsessed with the possibility of saving me when, in a few weeks, I’d be thrown in the Ring and most likely wouldn’t come out.
It wasn’t suicidal or me giving up, it was reality.
When has that ever been pretty?
“Well?” his impatience rose in his chest.
Well, I don’t know? I didn’t have an answer for him. There was a fierceness in his eyes, I’d only ever seen it when he was in battle, ready to protect and serve. Noah didn’t change much when he came back from the Academy, training for his role as Alpha. He’d always been quiet and reserved, speaking only when someone was deserving of his voice, usually in cahoots with Logan and the guys. It was never as raw and unfiltered as it was now.
How did I keep him from losing it?
“I don’t know,” I said honestly, because I didn’t. There was no reasonable explanation.
Something about this was rather… sweet? Yeah, sweet. Nobody had ever looked at me with that kind of desperation before, a need so strong that it melts in his eyes and bleeds out in his gaze.
My chest contracted and the walls of my throat narrowed, but I controlled my heart, hoping he couldn’t hear the butterflies swarming in my stomach.
“The voices stopped,” I said, breaking the silence that was choking me.
“When Nasha woke up, they disappeared.” Noah scoffed and rolled his tongue against the inside of his cheek.
“I knew there was something going on. Every time I touched you, you breathed like you hadn’t for hours,” he said.
“Years,” I corrected.
“Are you saying that you prefer your homicidal mutt over the demons in your head?”
I lifted a shoulder and shook my head. Tiredly.
“Haven’t noticed a difference really.” One was not better than the other. At this point I’d be grateful for complete, utter silence. No voices, no wolf, nothing but the emptiness of my mind where I could rebuild a life away from everything that had been taken from me.
Noah stepped closer but it was tense, like he had to control himself and would rather step back.
“Promise me you won’t give up. Give me a chance to figure this out, whatever this is, and see what I can do.”
I parted my lips to stop him from wishing and hoping, it never led to anything good. But Noah’s large hand cupped my cheek and he leaned down.
“Please,” he begged.
Maybe it’s a good thing, he’d have something to keep him preoccupied.
Why did I care so much all of a sudden?
Noah had done nothing from the start except despise my existence in his house and wish me away. The game with Landon that he helped orchestrate, the coercions, and the lies. That’s what I should be remembering, caring about, that’s what should kill this heat under my skin whenever he’s near. But it wasn’t the heat that crept under my skin, it wasn’t anything that could be turned off or put out. It was him. Noah was the one who had gotten under my skin and short of peeling it off to pluck him out, I wasn’t sure how to get rid of him. Or if I even wanted to.
It felt safe, his touch and his words, the way that his eyes looked at me with so much humanity that I forgot about the world for a moment.
“Sure.”
“Tell me,” he said and moved closer. He brushed his lips over mine, placing a featherlike kiss on the side of my mouth.
“Tell me in words,” he whispered.
His musky scent fluttered up my nose and kick-started my heart. I inhaled him, filled my lungs with enough of his scent to last me a few hours, remembered his touch so if he let go I could pretend it was still there.
“I promise.” Noah stopped, his lips hovered against mine and he smiled.
“Good girl.”
His other hand came around the small of my back and he pressed us together, his lips followed the movement and bruised against mine. It was wet, smily and teeth that clashed when neither of us could hold back the grins that pulled our lips up.
“Fuck, you taste amazing,” his tongue grazed mine, danced in perfect sync and memorized my taste.
“Make sure you get your fill, might be your last—” I pinched my lips shut and felt the instant cold when Noah pulled back. A storm brewed in his eyes and the lightning struck my chest, broke my ribs and pierced my heart.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…”
Maddie, you stupid bitch. Way to ruin a moment.
It was supposed to be a joke… I don’t know, foreplay?
Damn. His face fell into a puddle of mixed emotions, amongst them was anger and sorrow.
The door opened before either of us could say another word and my mother barged in, followed by Jack and my father.
Her eyes were blazing, yellow and predatory when she went for the attack. With an outstretched arm she moved past Noah and shoved her phone in my face. The screen was lit, on it was a video playing, the sound of which I was terrifyingly familiar with.
When I tell you that I tried to come up with a reasonable explanation for Onyx not being able to sense Nasha, I tried my fucking best. I tried hard because I wanted Noah to lay this to rest, not wanting him to become obsessed with the possibility of saving me when, in a few weeks, I’d be thrown in the Ring and most likely wouldn’t come out.
It wasn’t suicidal or me giving up, it was reality.
When has that ever been pretty?
“Well?” his impatience rose in his chest.
Well, I don’t know? I didn’t have an answer for him. There was a fierceness in his eyes, I’d only ever seen it when he was in battle, ready to protect and serve. Noah didn’t change much when he came back from the Academy, training for his role as Alpha. He’d always been quiet and reserved, speaking only when someone was deserving of his voice, usually in cahoots with Logan and the guys. It was never as raw and unfiltered as it was now.
How did I keep him from losing it?
“I don’t know,” I said honestly, because I didn’t. There was no reasonable explanation.
Something about this was rather… sweet? Yeah, sweet. Nobody had ever looked at me with that kind of desperation before, a need so strong that it melts in his eyes and bleeds out in his gaze.
My chest contracted and the walls of my throat narrowed, but I controlled my heart, hoping he couldn’t hear the butterflies swarming in my stomach.
“The voices stopped,” I said, breaking the silence that was choking me.
“When Nasha woke up, they disappeared.” Noah scoffed and rolled his tongue against the inside of his cheek.
“I knew there was something going on. Every time I touched you, you breathed like you hadn’t for hours,” he said.
“Years,” I corrected.
“Are you saying that you prefer your homicidal mutt over the demons in your head?”
I lifted a shoulder and shook my head. Tiredly.
“Haven’t noticed a difference really.” One was not better than the other. At this point I’d be grateful for complete, utter silence. No voices, no wolf, nothing but the emptiness of my mind where I could rebuild a life away from everything that had been taken from me.
Noah stepped closer but it was tense, like he had to control himself and would rather step back.
“Promise me you won’t give up. Give me a chance to figure this out, whatever this is, and see what I can do.”
I parted my lips to stop him from wishing and hoping, it never led to anything good. But Noah’s large hand cupped my cheek and he leaned down.
“Please,” he begged.
Maybe it’s a good thing, he’d have something to keep him preoccupied.
Why did I care so much all of a sudden?
Noah had done nothing from the start except despise my existence in his house and wish me away. The game with Landon that he helped orchestrate, the coercions, and the lies. That’s what I should be remembering, caring about, that’s what should kill this heat under my skin whenever he’s near. But it wasn’t the heat that crept under my skin, it wasn’t anything that could be turned off or put out. It was him. Noah was the one who had gotten under my skin and short of peeling it off to pluck him out, I wasn’t sure how to get rid of him. Or if I even wanted to.
It felt safe, his touch and his words, the way that his eyes looked at me with so much humanity that I forgot about the world for a moment.
“Sure.”
“Tell me,” he said and moved closer. He brushed his lips over mine, placing a featherlike kiss on the side of my mouth.
“Tell me in words,” he whispered.
His musky scent fluttered up my nose and kick-started my heart. I inhaled him, filled my lungs with enough of his scent to last me a few hours, remembered his touch so if he let go I could pretend it was still there.
“I promise.” Noah stopped, his lips hovered against mine and he smiled.
“Good girl.”
His other hand came around the small of my back and he pressed us together, his lips followed the movement and bruised against mine. It was wet, smily and teeth that clashed when neither of us could hold back the grins that pulled our lips up.
“Fuck, you taste amazing,” his tongue grazed mine, danced in perfect sync and memorized my taste.
“Make sure you get your fill, might be your last—” I pinched my lips shut and felt the instant cold when Noah pulled back. A storm brewed in his eyes and the lightning struck my chest, broke my ribs and pierced my heart.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…”
Maddie, you stupid bitch. Way to ruin a moment.
It was supposed to be a joke… I don’t know, foreplay?
Damn. His face fell into a puddle of mixed emotions, amongst them was anger and sorrow.
The door opened before either of us could say another word and my mother barged in, followed by Jack and my father.
Her eyes were blazing, yellow and predatory when she went for the attack. With an outstretched arm she moved past Noah and shoved her phone in my face. The screen was lit, on it was a video playing, the sound of which I was terrifyingly familiar with.
End of The Alpha's Gamble Chapter 89. Continue reading Chapter 90 or return to The Alpha's Gamble book page.