The Emancipation of a Fuckboy - Chapter 54: Chapter 54

Valentine
In the middle of the night, I had a terrible dream. I don't know if it was a dream or nightmare, I can't really tell the difference. It was the moment in high school when I was about to ask Dominic to be my boyfriend. I guess that's the part where I can say it's a dream but everything that happened afterward was a nightmare.
I was standing in front of the whole campus. I can see my friends watching with such excitement and even my teammates were all there. I called for everyone's attention and all curious and confused eyes turned their sight on me with such microscopic focus that I almost felt like being dissected. But I didn't care if I was being dissected or not, all I care about is Dominic.
"Sorry for the interruption but, may I please get all of your attention here."
My heart was pumping faster than normal. Faster and faster that I was almost out of breath.
"I know you all know me and that you know how I truly feel for Dominic"
I was honest with my words and even more honest with my feelings.
"I love you, Dominic! You are my world." I swallowed deep and then turned around to face Dominic. My shaky voice is echoing all throughout the gymnasium and everyone went completely quiet as I was about to do this.
"Dominic Warren, will you be my boyfriend?" I let out finally. My heart is about to burst with so much joy that I wasn't even expecting what's going to happen next.
"I..... I'm sorry, Valentine" Dominic uttered and I was immediately sent to a barren world of confusion.
"Huh? What do you mean?" I asked trying to hold my breath.
"I don't love you, Valentine, I'm really sorry." Dominic enunciated the words as if he's reciting spoken poetry. The words he just let out of his mouth seemed as if I'm in a nightmare and it's true, I was in a nightmare but it felt so much like reality to me.
"I don't understand" I let out shaking my head as I refused to accept what Dominic had just said to me.
"No, no. This isn't happening." I whispered to myself as I began to shut down. "No, no, no. Not this again." I was shaking my head.
I jumped down the stage and began running. One giant step and I was already picking up my pace. As I was about to leave the building I unexpectedly stepped into a void of darkness. There was complete nothing, but I didn't stop running, I just kept on moving. I realized that I wasn't going anywhere, everything's just dark and void. I feel like I'm not reaching something. But I didn't stop, I kept on running until a giant holographic motion resembling the appearance of my mom showed up.
"I don't want a sickly child." She said as she was approaching me with her giant face. The words seemed to echo throughout the void making my ears bleed. I turned around to run away from her. I tried going faster and just when I thought I got away from her, another giant showed up. It was Dominic and he was quickly approaching me.
"I'm never in love with you. I will never be in love with you." He spat right at my face and it echoed throughout the void once again.
"No," I let out almost exhausted that I can't even catch my breath anymore.
I decided to stop running and eventually covered my ears to stop hearing these words. I turned around and my mom was there again. Both of them, surrounding me with their giant heads and tiny body. They kept on repeating what they were saying that I can't take it anymore. I tried screaming but there seemed to be no sound coming out of my throat. That's when I eventually woke up.
Dripping in sweats, I woke up trembling like a wet cat. I quickly propelled myself up and sat as I slowly catch my breath.
"Hey, Valentine. Are you okay?" I heard Dominic speak from behind. Waking up from the sounds that I created, he propped himself as well.
"I'm so sorry," I let out almost confused about what's happening. I was looking at the wall thinking of something that I couldn't quite comprehend. I was breathing heavily as I hugged my knees. "Stop! I'm sorry."
"Hey, hey, hey," Dominic held my hands. "It's okay, it's okay. Calm down! I'm here for you." Dominic blabbered in the most calming way possible.
"I'm..."
"Why are you apologizing?" Dominic asked curiously as he held my face and looked me in the eye. I guess that's the moment that I was pulled back to the actual reality.
"Nothing. It's nothing." I swallowed and blinked twice. "I just had a bad dream,"
"What is it about?" Dominic asked with a grit of concern in his tone and I was honestly speechless for a moment. I don't know exactly what to say. I just had a nightmare of how he broke my heart and I guess how my mom broke my heart.
"Can I just hug you for a moment?" I let out a request. For the past five years, I'd never thought I'd never make this request ever again but here I am asking for it.
"Of course, come here!" Dominic nodded and I immediately hugged him. I closed my eyes and hugged him as tight as I could. I can feel my heart still pumping faster but I'm slowly calming down. There's was a moment of silence before I eventually decided to say something. "Don't ever break my heart again," I whispered almost inaudible but Dominic heard it nonetheless.
"I won't. I promise you that." He replied mimicking my inaudible tone. At this moment, I forgot about the reality that I was the one planning on breaking his heart. I was just swept with fear that I can't think straight.
We hugged for about five more minutes before I decided that I'm finally okay. I've managed to calm down. We switched positions and went back to bed. This time Dominic was the one on the outer spoon and I was the one being spooned. I curled up inside his arms as he held me tight that I quickly obtained the exact comfort that I needed. I closed my eyes and eventually fell asleep.
The next morning, I woke up late and the sun was already up on the horizon. I was surprised to see no sign of Dominic beside me. I was worried that he'd probably gone home already. By the time I stepped downstairs, I found him cooking in the kitchen.
"I thought you already went home," I let out a breath of relief. I inched my way near him and hugged him from behind.
"Oh," Dominic uttered as a simple reaction. "Good morning Mr. Grande." He spat as he was about to transfer the bacon to the plates.
"Good morning too," I said and kissed his neck.
"I woke up early and couldn't wait for you to wake up so I just decided to cook for breakfast," Dominic spat as I unclasp away from the hug and let him take the plates to the dining table.
"Just like a real wife huh?" I said jokingly.
"Perhaps, a real househusband?" Dominic raised his eyebrows at me and we both ended up chuckling.
After having our breakfast, I let Dominic borrow some of my clothes and we decided to go out and have a stroll around the city. As I was driving I suddenly remembered that I just finished step number seven. I really did have the blue balls that I was afraid of but it wasn't like how it used to feel. It was still painful but I managed to skate by.
We went on a quick stroll at the park and we saw nothing but people walking their dogs and some couples having their moment. Dominic and I aren't a couple and that's one thing that's setting this ambiance a little bit off. For some reason, I thought it was kind of awkward to be in this type of place and it was quite a breath of relief that Dominic convinced me to go to the carnival. Nothing much happened there. We didn't take any rides, we just walked around, bought some ice creams, and talked about unimportant matters until we agreed that were both hungry. It was about 3 o'clock when we finally got a table at the nearest restaurant. We waited for almost twenty minutes since there are a lot of people today.
"I somehow regret coming to this place," Dominic spat as we finally sat down.
"It's weekend so many people are going out," I uttered. I haven't gone out like this on weekends but I'm not even surprised to see crowds of people taking a break from their weekdays routine.
"Yeah, anyway what would you like to have?" Dominic asked as he glued his eyes on the menu.
"Anything," I spat.
"I want a specific answer, Valentine!" Dominic scowled at me.
"Well I don't know what they have so," I replied almost defensive.
"Here take a look," He said handing me the menu.
"No, it's okay. I'll just have what you'll have."
"Okay,"
Dominic was quick enough to choose our food and called the attention of the waiter almost immediately. As he was telling our order to the waiter, my eyes caught a glimpse of a familiar woman at the furthest corner. She was with two little girls, an identical twin, and she was feeding them with a smile on her face. As I take a look closer I realized that the woman was my mom. My heart pumped for a moment as I quickly looked away. Is this even real?
"Val," Dominic called for my name just after he finished ordering.
"What?"
"My mom's calling, excuse me for a minute." He uttered and without waiting for my answer, he quickly went outside.
The odds are really trying to force-feed me with this.
Valentine, you're a better person now. I whispered to myself as I momentarily closed my eyes. I clenched my fist under the table and tried to calm myself down. I haven't seen my mom for several years and I'm sure I've already forgotten about her. But I guess seeing her proved it wrong. What she did was utterly unforgivable but I took a deep breath and assessed myself. Perhaps it's about time to forgive her. It's been a decade since she left us. I can definitely say I don't have the grudge anymore but no one can't deny the fact that I still feel the pain deep inside me. I opened my eyes and looked at them once again. There's nothing in front of her and I'm guessing she just ordered for the kids. I'm sure those are her kids. They were about six or something. My mom looked much older than what I'm expecting. I don't know what's going on with her life at this point but she looked like she's been exhausted.
I noticed the twins were fighting for a slice of cake and she just had to split it for them. It was hard seeing it but I did not look away. I just stared at how she distributed the pieces. I have to admit I felt jealous of it. Every moment of it deserved a sip of jealousy from me. Looking at how she tried to calm them down without getting angry is commendable. She was never the one to care for me and Vincent, even when we were fighting she'd just yell at us without proper context and that's making this part heart-wrenching. The twins ate up the cake almost quickly as if they haven't had one in their life.
"Sorry about that," I didn't realize that Dominic already came back. My attention was still glued to my mom and the twins. "Valentine?" Dominic waved his hand in front of my face ultimately gaining my attention.
"Sorry," I said getting my sight away from my mom.
"What are you staring at?" He asked and looked in the same direction that I was staring a while ago.
"It's nothing," I said.
Dominic and I had a little conversation for about five minutes as we waited for the food. He was asking me some questions and I couldn't even focus. By the time Dominic noticed our order is taking so long I noticed my mom and the kids were already leaving.
"I just want to follow up..."
"Hey, Dominic!" Dominic was already talking with the waiter but I deliberately cut him off. "Just cancel the order." I spat.
"What? But we hav..." He was about to protest but I was just so ruthless to him.
"Just cancel it."
Dominic didn't have a choice but to cancel our order and as soon as everything is good, I pulled him nonchalantly.
"Where are we going?" He asked seemingly confused.
"Just follow me," I spat.
I glued my eyes on my mom as she slowly carried the kids. Her clothes weren't that nice as they used to be. She loved those stylish thigh-high boots and hookerish tops but now she's fully covered. I'm starting to have an insight on her just by seeing that. As we were following them I saw a small cake shop and quickly bought a box of it before eventually rushing to get back to them. Dominic was evidently pissed throughout the journey but surprisingly he just kept his mouth shut and followed me. My mom rode the bus and we had to hide ourselves when we followed them inside. We were like intel gathering some information.
Finally, after the following game, we had arrived at the destination. A building by the outskirts of the city.
"Is that your mom?" Dominic asked when we stopped to hide and let them get inside first. The apartment building wasn't what I expected. It was rather old and seemingly forgotten to be renovated.
"Yes," I nodded wiping my sweats.
"I knew it." He spat.
"You knew?" I asked.
"When we were following her I realized she was a bit familiar but I can't just quite remember her," Dominic admitted. Somehow, a rush of relief swept over me. At least I don't have to explain everything to him.
"I'm so sorry for dragging you in this trouble,"
"No, it's okay. I completely understand."
We waited for about ten minutes before we decided to knock on the door. The door opened almost immediately and one of the girls showed up.
"Who are you?" She asked innocently. I stared at her for about five seconds deeply contemplating the fact that I have some half-sisters.
"Is your mom there?" I asked finally.
"Mama!" The little girl yelled. "Someone's looking for you!"
"One second!" I heard my mom shout and I was nervous for a moment.
In just a few seconds my mom finally showed up.