The Outside Lines (boyxboy) - Chapter 32: Chapter 32

Noah's POV
My heart nearly burst out of my chest at the sight of Nathan... making out with...
Amber.
The world froze over, my legs wouldn't move at that moment no matter how hard I tried, like they were encased in a thick sheet of ice.
Taylor's eyes met mine. Worry and pity shone from them as she watched me standing bewildered at the doorway.
I couldn't hear a thing. Despite all the surrounding noises being almost deafening my shock was enough to phase them out.
I stood at the door in fear, witnessing the whole thing. When my legs finally listened to my command, I took off in the opposite direction.
I ran.
I ran like my life depended on it. My heart raced, it felt like it was going to burst in my chest, and it wasn't from running. I was foolish enough to think I could out run my problems.
I raced across the yard, kicking up blades of grass. I ran wherever my legs took me, my mind in a haze.
It felt like I'd been running for an eternity, but in reality only a few minutes had passed before I ended up somewhere in the forest across the street from the Wailing's property. I gasped for breaths of air, hunched over and gripping my legs. Normally I would've been able to run ten times farther without breaking a sweat, but I was feeling so drained emotionally that it was effecting me physically.
...Why should I even care that Nathan kissed Amber? It's not like we're dating. The fact that I had no answer to that annoyed me. I dropped to the grass and leaves beneath me, furiously ruffling my hair in frustration and tears threatening to stream from the lids of my eyes.
I sat in the middle of the chilly forest half naked with grass, leaves and bugs tickling my bare legs. I bet I look like an absolute fool. I wanted nothing more than to bury my head under the dirt and disappear.
"It's not like we had a chance at dating anyway. You were the one who decided to keep him as nothing more than a friend." I tried to reason with myself. It wasn't very convincing though.
"We can't be more than friends, can we? He'll hurt me, just like Chad did right?"
"...All signs point to him actually liking me."
"But."
"But I'm scared. I'm scared to take a chance."
...
"What's wrong with me? Why am I such a coward? I can do the most daring and dastardly things, yet when it comes to dealing with emotions, I'm a wimp." I finally blamed myself.
My hands gripped at the locks of blond hair fountaining from the top of my head in frustration. It's ironic, being out here like this finally helped me sort out the thoughts weighing on my mind, but it didn't help much seeing as they were still heavy just the same. It's sort of like sorting old papers instead of binning it.
I really do like Nathan a lot, don't I...
The quietness of the wind weaving through the darkened forest gave off an eerie, yet vaguely peaceful feeling. I glanced back and forth studying the many plants and tree trunks illuminated by the brightly glowing ball in the sky, that being the moon. I sat there for at least an hour, not wanting to return to the party. Though the freezing air became so pronounced and harsh against my bare skin that if I didn't start heading back now I'd die here in the grass from hypothermia.
The grim thought had me darting upright faster than I would have if a teacher was waking me during class. As I stood some dry leaves crunched under my hand. Chills rode down my spine when another patch of leaves crunched somewhere near by. While my body froze like I was in one of those nightmares where your legs don't work, my eyes traced every corner of the ill-lit forest with haste.
I raised my quivering hands to my chest, tightening them into a ball, waiting for my demise.
A shadow drifted from behind one of the trees and approached.
"Noah." The shadows voice called out in a powerful whisper. My body jumped an inch in the opposite direction, readying to run but failing miserably.
"Noah, there you are." My eyes widened when the shadow stepped out under the moon light. The long red hair, the soft facial futures, It was Taylor, or it appeared to be at least. For all I know she could be a shapeshifting goblin that lives in this sketchy forest.
"W-what? What are you doing here?" I questioned her presence, wincing at the blinding bright light from her phone being pointed in my face.
"I came to check up on you." She continued to whisper. "That whole scene must've been a shocker... Y'know the kiss and all. I mean you ran all the way out here for god's sake." She slowly turned, taking in the eerie surroundings.
I hunched back down into the grass, wrapping my arms around my legs hiding my tear kissed face.
"Don't worry about Nathan too much." Taylor spoke again after some time had passed. "He's just drunk. A kiss like that can't mean much."
The thought crossed my mind, but didn't seem like a good enough excuse to justify it. I couldn't help but feel upset regardless of his lack of sobriety. I didn't tell her that though, I continued brooding with nature, silently.
"C'mon... let me give you a ride home before you freeze to death." She gestured to my half naked body. I peeked up at her through my legs and after a few seconds of hesitation I accepted her offer, lifting myself up from the ground once again.
"You better know the way out of here." She whispered harshly. Luckily I did.
"Why are you whispering?" I asked the question that had been weighing on my mind ever since she showed up. I raised a brow at the seemingly distracted girl walking beside me. Her head was constantly darting around as if she were playing spot the ghost in a haunted graveyard.
"I don't want to attract any large animals." She answered, her sight still everywhere but the direction we were walking in.
"Shouldn't you be aware of what's out here and how to navigate the area? I mean, this IS your property." I rolled my eyes at the fool.
"It's not like I have any reason to be roaming these woods though." She retorted. She made a good point, but I didn't acknowledge it.
Our footsteps crunching on the gravel of the driveway echoed into the bleak night as we reached Taylor's car. I slid into the passenger seat and rested my head against the window. When Taylor pulled out of the driveway I watched as the party faded out of sight. It left a bittersweet feeling...
"Is it okay for you to be leaving the party unattended." I asked, not turning my gaze away from the window of the small car.
"Sure. There are still plenty sober people there, so things shouldn't get too crazy." Taylor answered in her usual low tone.
"Nathan only had a few small bottles of alcohol and went absolutely bonkers. Apparently he's a light weight drinker." Taylor chuckled, finding it amusing. I found the idea of someone like Nathan being so susceptible to alcohol pretty ironic myself. I never imagined someone like him would get done in so easily.
Still though, they say that alcohol is just a gateway to your inner feelings, which would mean he's always wanted to kiss Amber, right? The more I thought about it the more my chest ached. I tried to shut of my brain but that only made me think about it more.
I watched the shadows of trees enveloped in the night roll by. The infrequent appearance of streetlights passing by the car's window almost put me to sleep. I wish it had cause by the time we reached my home my mind was running at full capacity.
Taylor got out of the car and opened my end. A look of pity paining her face came into view as I stumbled out of the vehicle.
I offered a weak smile to show her I was doing okay. I wasn't.
She smiled back, but knowing her she could see through my own like a crystal ball.
"If you need anything just call me okay?" She gripped my shoulder. "Or text me if you prefer, I don't care."
"Okay?" She repeated, waiting for my response.
Instead of speaking I nodded with another smile.
She narrowed her eyes at me.
I nodded again in response, my smile growing brighter knowing it annoyed her. She delivered a playful punch to my chest, shaking her head.
"I'm gonna head back now. I don't want to leave the party unattended for too long. I should probably be sending everyone home soon anyway." Taylor said looking at the time on her phone.
"It's already past midnight." She winced, a slight panic overcoming her. She was panicking? I almost freaking pissed myself hearing how late it was. My parents are probably going to have my head on a steak.
"Night Taylor, drive safely." I finally spoke, waving her off.
"Yes mom." She responded sarcastically, waving back at me as she got in her car.
I watched her drive off then charged for the front door as if my life depended on it, heck it probably did. As soon as I twisted the handle I shoved the door open and closed it just as quickly, charging for the stairs with the power of one hundred stampeding elephants, hoping not to be noticed.
"Noah?!" Yup I've been spotted. Mom called out to me dumbfounded. "Where have you been? Why are you half naked?" She interrogated at the speed of light.
"I was hanging out with some friends at their pool and forgot my clothes." I answered honestly in a haste, leaving out some finder details as I raced for the top of the stairs hoping to avoid further questioning. The story seemed like it was conjured up by a four year-old with their hand caught in the cookie jar, but despite that mom seemed to believe me.
"You'd better not be lying to me again." She yelled.
"I'm not, I swear it on the holy father himself!" I pulled out the most powerful sentence known to our extended family. Whenever someone pulled out this line you knew they were telling the truth. Mom says if it's used as a lie you'll be smite down by the heavens.
The silence flooding downstairs meant that mom was done with her interrogating. My tense, freezing body suddenly melted into a puddle of relief. I wasn't about to wait around for her to offer me candy though, so I picked myself up off the floor and ran for my room.
I didn't bother getting dressed. I just fell backwards, plopping onto my bed. My frozen skin finally had a source of warmth. It felt as though I was a block of ice thawing out right there in the sheets.
I stared at the diamond shape patterns spanning across the ceiling as I recollected what transpired during the party. My emotional state was a like a flaming dumpster pile.
Nathan (The Next Morning)
A rigid groan escaped my lips as I woke from my deepest slumber yet.
"Crap, why does my head hurt so much?" I muttered to myself leaning up from my bed. It felt harder than usual. I brushed a wrist over my still locked eyelids, wiping the sleep from them.
It was then that after finally prying them open I realized, I wasn't sleeping in my bed, I wasn't even in my own house. My head shot to every corner of the room, doing a double take and a then a triple take. My heart stood still when I saw several bodies laid out across the room. I was captured in a frightful panic until I remembered bits and pieces from last night.
"I remember having a couple drinks... and that's about it." I thought out loud, trying to make sense of the situation.
There was an uncomfortable chill attacking my body. I glanced down only to realize I was in nothing but my underwear. A bright shade of pink flushed my cheeks out of embarrassment.
"What did I do?" I asked myself, panicked. I quickly stood from the solid wooden floor to search for my missing clothes but the raging headache from earlier sent me anchoring straight back down to my knees with no mercy. I winced grasping tightly at the pain in my forehead.
The glass door to the pool house suddenly opened. The sound of footsteps approached but I was unable to lift my head high enough to see who it was due to the striking pain.
"It's time to get your asses up and outta here!"
It was Taylor. She came in clashing what sounded like two metal pans together in an attempt to wake everybody up. I wouldn't be surprised if she woke the dead with how extreme it was. The noises were so loud it felt like my skull was cracking. I crumbled to the ground gripping my ears so tightly I was concerned I'd pull them right off my head.
"Taylor." I grunted her name, signaling her to stop with the raise of a hand.
There was a brief moment of silence. Then a storm of repeated clanking and clashing followed, sending me to the floor in agony once again.
All I was capable of doing at that moment was groan. I wasn't the only one. Everybody in the room rose like zombies after several clashes of the pan. When I looked up I half expected them to resemble a ball of smashed metal with the way she handled them. They were still perfectly intact.
"Party's over, thanks for coming." Taylor rushed them out. "Grab a banana on your way out, it'll help with the hangover." She informed them, nudging her head to the neatly stocked bowl of fruit placed at the end of the table nearest to the door.
"The party was awesome." A skinny looking guy complimented the redhead as he hurried out the room. A prideful smile crowned her face as she stood tall.
After the room emptied I managed to lift my sore body onto the nearest couch.
"Taylor, what... happened? Did I mess up the party?" I croaked worriedly, raising my throbbing head enough to lock eyes with the intrigued girl stood mere feet away from me.
"You were the life blood of the party Nathan. Everyone loved you." She said to me wearing an assuring smile. A sense of relief washed over me. I could almost feel it pass over my body.
"That said, you did make quite a bit of trouble for yourself." She continued as she went around picking up trash and belongings littered across the sunlit room.
A wave of fear possessed my face and body, paralyzing me in place. I sat silently, overcome by terror. I waited not speaking a word, hoping for her to explain. Had I done something bad?
I held a hand against my face blocking out the painful sunlight attacking the large glass windows, trying to keep my eyes on the busy girl. I bet I went paler than a ghost waiting in suspense.
"You've got some apologizing to do."
"You got drunk and vomited on Arie's shirt. She was mortified." Who's Arie?
"You groped Noah in front of the entire party. Some of them assumed you were just teasing him since he's gay, but lets be real you and I both know it's more than that." The straightforwardness was making her delivery all the more painful.
"Oh god." I gasped to myself, still covering half of my face with a hand.
"Oh right, and you made out with Amber in front of the same crowd. Noah saw it." She'd finally finished listing the things written on my death sentence.
After almost nearly hyperventilating I released the loudest groan I'd ever had up until that point.
"I knew you'd be hungover after getting so messed up, so I brought you some eggs and a banana." While kneeling on the floor Taylor nudged her head over to the same table as last time, though only now did I noticed the small plate of eggs sat beside the basket of fruit.
"I know how much you like bananas so I made sure to bring you one.." She said wearing a knowing smirk.
"I think you're getting bananas confused with sausages." I corrected her, now my turn to sport the smug crown.
"Big difference." She rolled her eyes with a slight shake of her head. That was the first time today that I managed to laugh.
I stood up and strode across the wooden floor to get to my meal. I eyed the delicious looking sunny side up eggs calling out my name.
"Thanks for this." I showed my appreciation for Taylor's selfless effort, lifting up the plate from the wooden table. She looked over her shoulder and flashed a small side smile before returning to her task.
After finishing the breakfast Taylor brought me I pitched in with the cleaning. My headache dropped considerably from when I woke up so I was able to move around much more.
We cleaned the kitchen full of empty beer bottles, the living room scattered with torn chip bags, the pool side lined with misplaced shirts and finally the front yard. It took around an hour or so to finish up, but Taylor and I made a mean cleaning team. We were speedy and our routes were effective.
"I forgot about the storm that comes after the party." Taylor sighed, scratching her head as she eyed the many black bags full of trash sprawled out in front of us.
"This was my first high school party, so I didn't know what to expect." I said more so to myself.
"Well?" Her hair fell over her shoulders like silk as she bent over to get a view of my own face.
I lifted my brows, waiting for her to finish.
"How was it? What did you think of the party?" She asked with clarity.
"It was pretty awesome. I had a lot of fun with everyone." Unknowingly a smile brighter than the sun beaming overhead shone on my face.
"Good to know." She twirled around, satisfied with my answer.
"I should probably be getting back home now. I didn't tell my mom I'd be out all night so she might be curious where i am." I announced and pointed to my car just across the road, keys in hand.
"Okay. "She nodded her head in short and slow motions. "Tell her I said hi if you see her."
"Will do. I'll see you on Monday." I waved back to her on my way down the fancy stone pathway.
A realization hit when I settled into the soft seat of my car. Monday is going to be difficult. Despite Taylor and I cleaning up all the physical mess left over after the party, there were still a lot of of mental things I needed to clean up.
(Monday)
Yesterday was uneventful compared to the days prior. I spent most of it singing in the park with my guitar. I needed something to distract me from the worry gnawing at the back of my head.
With the way my guilt was brewing inside me I would've apologized to Noah and Amber over text in a heartbeat, but the only number I had was Taylor's, even after all of this time.
I sat my guitar down in the dry grass and tilted my head backwards to grace the sky. A large sigh escaped my lips as a gust of cold wind washed over my poorly clothed frame. I shut my eyes and let the world swallow me whole. And before I knew it Monday had already arrived.
The un-oiled brakes on my car slightly screeched as I pulled into the school's driveway. I shut off the engine and stepped out under the dim gray sky. A strong gust of wind blew through my neatly combed hair, messing up my morning's work.
*Sigh*
I shut the car's door with one hand and ran the other through my messy hair.
"He's so hot, isn't he?"
"He's the one from Taylor's party everyone is talking about, right?"
"Yeah that's Nathan"
"Where has he been all this time? Why have we never seen him on the school's hottest guys list?"
I could hear my name spoken every which way I turned. I used small tilts of my head to tune in on the many conversations blaring throughout the parking lot. I couldn't help but be a little flustered with how much attention was drawn my way.
I didn't want to get a big head about it, but attentionjust felt... rewarding in a sort of way. I struggled to improve myself, to overcome the rut I'd been placed in. I worked hard all throughout the year, and this appeared to be the results of it paying off. I can finally go up to my mother and proudly tell her I have friends, other people who care about me besides herself.
The energy walking down the halls felt just as intense as it was outside. I'd never had so much attention on me at one time. I got so used to people avoiding me like I was some kind of diseased man that such a change
"That one card trick you did was rad!"
"You're really a sight to behold when you're drunk."
"Dude, what's your workout routine?"
"Hey, come hang out with my friends and I so we have a better shot at picking up some babes!"
I was overwhelmed by the vast number of people trying to talk to me. I couldn't keep up with everything. I flashed them quick smiles of gratitude and continued down the hall, only for the same thing to repeat over again.
My top priority right now was finding Noah and Amber. I had to apologize for my behavior as soon as possible before they grow to resent me.
I could've sworn I ran around the entire school several times, but nothing. I ran into Taylor, but not even she's seen the two.
Hunched over and out of breath standing in front of the school building I released a long exhausted sigh. Searching for them in a space as large as this, it almost felt futile. It was like looking for two needles in a haystack.
The school bells rang, signaling everyone to class. I walked, head lowered in disappointment. Every passing second I grew more anxious. If I didn't see them during lunch then I'd at least run into Amber during algebra.
The first few classes came and went. It was finally time for lunch. I grabbed my bag, swallowed the lump in my throat, and walked out of the classroom confidently. My steps grew heavy, but that wasn't enough to slow my pace. The sea of roaring noises being the school halls became a blur. Tunnel vision formed, my eyes set on nothing but my destination.
I froze. Standing just outside the cafeteria entrance was Amber. Her silky black hair swayed as she glanced back and forth, as if she were waiting for someone.
The heaviness weighing in my step finally became a hindrance. It felt as if my legs would snap in two if I continued any further. Still, it wasn't enough to stop me.
"Hey Amber uh-"
"Oh, hi Nathan." Her head snapped in the direction of my voice. I wasn't expecting to be greeted with a smile as bright as the one she was wearing. She brushed her hair over her shoulder, with her smile only becoming more radiant.
"I brought something extra special to lunch today. I'm wasn't sure if you wanted to try it." Her soft stare shifted from me to the leather hand bag slung over her small shoulder.
"Oh cool... Listen Amber. About what happened at the party, I'm really sorry about whatever I might have done. I was drunk and I don't remember any of it. I don't want it to jeopardize our friendship, and I can assure you it won't happen again." I blurted out my apology, leaving little room for her to speak. It wasn't intentional, I just had to relieve the heavy weight on chest.
She didn't respond. She remained silent, her smile slowly fading. I couldn't help but take notice of her playing with her fingers.
A solid ten seconds passed before she said anything. "It's fine."
"I'm gonna head in." She pointed to the door and walked away without another word.
Did I... say something wrong?
It seemed as if her emotions were inverted. Her face was glowing when I approached, and fell flat after my apology.
I know I have a tendency to be dense, but I seriously can't put my finger on what I did wrong.
I shook my head, reshuffling my thoughts. "Right, I still have to apologize to Noah. I hope things don't turn out the same way as they just did with Amber..."
After much delay standing in the halls like a potted ficus I finally entered the cafeteria. But much to my disappointment Noah was no where in sight.