The Secret The Cheerleader Doesn't... - Chapter 25: Chapter 25

ANI'S POV
I stare down at my phone, taken back by Cassie's outburst. What? Spend time with Jennifer? What is she thinking? What is going on?
"I guess you pissed off your wife once more," Jeremiah said, "first Jaelynn and now the wife... shit looks shitty for you."
"Shut up," I grumbled, "it's not my fault I have to work with Jennifer."
"But it is your fault that you kissed her," he said, grabbing his stuff to leave.
"I didn't kiss her!" I yelled but he just waved me off and went home. Sitting back in my seat, I held my head. Migraine after migraine. Why did Jaelynn tell Cassie? "It's not Jaelynn's fault and you know that," I mumbled to myself.... Pinching my nose bridge, I hear the elevator ding and in came Jennifer.  Standing up, I watched as she came over, "Ms. Costa, what is it we need to discuss."
She dropped a folder on my desk, "Your testimony, Doctor."
"What?" I picked it up, "Why am I on stand?"
"You're my professional view... the one to explain how the child was abused by her family.  No one else can testify except the one who collected the data," she said, picking up my bag and jacket.  I reached to grab them back, but she stopped me, "It's going to take all night.  A testimony isn't something you wing.  You may be the best in this fucking building, but lawyers are trained to rip people like you apart."
She walked to the elevator and I had no choice but to follow.
~
"Got it?" She circled the words in red ink.
"It's not rocket science," I grumbled back.  Collecting the papers, I leaned back and took a breath.  Cheesecake Factory was approximately an hour drive from me, all because of traffic.  They're probably about to pay the bill.
"Missing your family?"
"Don't get personal with me," I warned.
"I'm sorry Antonia," she abruptly said.  I watched her closely.  "I shouldn't have kissed you like that... you're a married woman who is apparently in love."
"Not 'apparently'," I said, "I love her."
"Do you?" She asked but this one stopped me, "Because it seems like Cassie is more of an obligation than a love for you."
"W-What do you mean?" I asked.
"When was the last time you two had sex?"
Standing up, I said, "What the fuck!"
"It's a normal question," she replied, leaning back, "do you know the average couple has sex 2-3 times a week.  The quantity of sex isn't as important as the quality, however.  Do you get off Antonia?  Does Cassie get you excited?  Get you in the mood and passionate?"
"This is extremely inappropriate and none of your business," I said, "Cassie loves me and I love her.  That's all that matters."
"That's what victims say when questioned by the police," she said, having a chill go down my bones, "you know what it's like to be a victim.... especially one of both sexual and physical abuse."
"Shut up," I warned.
"I know what Cassie did," she said, getting up this time, "I also know that because of Cassie you became a psychologist, that you moved your entire life, that you have given up on many things to please her."
She took my hands but I ripped them back, "Like you can say shit.  You probably drugged me that night in the hotel!"  I knew she didn't.... but I wanted her to stop.
"Drugged you?  Are you serious?  We were both drunk and giggling.  You were so drunk that you literally triple dogged dared me to take my shirt and bra off.  Then I did and I dared you to do the same.  We kept it going and we kept drinking!  I was so drunk that I threw open the doors to the balcony, stepped out butt naked, and confessed my undying love for you.  You found it so fucking romantic, you ran up to me, naked, and kissed me.  Then we went back to bed and you told me how you haven't had sex the way you wanted, so you asked me to please you and I did-" she then realized how much she spoke... how she let the cat out of the bag.  I collapsed to the couch.  My soul feel out of my body after hearing all of that.
I asked her to have sex with me.
I was the one to start the dare.
I was the one to kiss her.
I was the one to say I didn't like sex with Cassie.
Tears brimmed in my eyes and Jennifer kneeled in front of me, "You were drunk Antonia... you weren't thinking straight.  You're under a lot of pressure from work and at home.  You're constantly the strong one, the one that keeps everything working properly.  You make sure the kids are good, that the house is paid for, that Cassie is mentally and physically good.  You never pay attention to yourself so when you got drunk you did stupid stuff to make up for constantly putting yourself last."
"But in effort of being selfish I cheated on the love of my life," I whispered.
"Antonia," she took my hands, rubbing circles on top of my knuckles, "do you actually love Cassie or are you guilty for what happened to her?"
"What?"
"After finding out what happened to her... even before all of that.  Knowing she was alone mentally, you probably felt bad for her and so you tolerated the toxic relationship.  You probably forced yourself to love her... Antonia... you never mention Cassie unless someone talks about her.  You mention your kids, you mention your work, you even mention your friends... but never Cassie," she said.
"That's because I don't like people knowing about what happened to her and what she deals with."
"That's an excuse," she said.  She got closer to me... very close, "Antonia... if you truly love Cassie like you say you do, then why did you want me that night?  When I was holding you, you never called for Cassie... you said my name.  You kissed me and said I was a good kisser... not Cassie."
Staring at Jennifer in the eyes, I was so lost.
Do I love Cassie?