the summer of 1993 ── dohwa baek - Chapter 11: Chapter 11

The words ricochetted against the edges of Y/N's brain, acting as a catalyst to soothe her nerves. She looked around, her gaze flickering across the array of towering buildings with uncertainty. This was the first time she had been aware that she was actively roaming around within her nightmare while being asleep instead of realising it after waking up.
Lucid dreaming — that was what her mother had called it once.
She gave her outfit a quick once-over; a white top and washed jeans, her worn-out tennis shoes, and her bag hanging down her shoulders. The red telephone booth faced her ominously, and a sea of automobiles waved past the sidewalk. Every headlight threatened to blind her.
"It's a dream." She said out loud for verbal clarification. "Oh my God."
Dohwa must be here.
Her head whipped back, scanning the area to search for a tuff of blond. It wouldn't be that hard of a task because it was a pretty uncommon hair colour in Korea.
Unfortunately for her — she didn't see him occupying his usual spot. Her stance faltered with disappointment.
Then she remembered the last thing they had talked about the previous evening. The thing that caused her to abruptly hang up. Her blood ran cold at the memory, her palms growing clammy.
Stop growing clammy.
They actually stopped.
"The summer of 2023, huh?"
What a bizarre thing to say. He behaved as if it was a fact rather than a terrible joke. That he was somehow thirty years ahead of her. The weird thing was, a small fragment of her believed it to be true. Yes, it would make zero sense considering they called every single day, and such things only happened in the Sci-Fi books she rented from the library, but... the difference between them started to make sense when she viewed their past conversations through that lens. How he seemed to mention things she was unaware of. Mention things that didn't even exist.
Like Seo Taiji and Boys disbanding decades ago, owning smartphones, having an anonymous account and... different moons on the same night.
It's impossible. Don't think about it.
Y/N paraded towards the vending machine, fishing through her pockets for some coins. While she was trapped in her subconscious, she might as well buy herself a can of cola. Something she had been craving for.
A hand glided past her, putting a pause to her movements. It punched the buttons on the metal tool to get a strawberry-flavoured Milkis, fueling her ire to a dangerous degree. Was this person that impatient?
"Excuse m—"
Her voice died in her throat.
"You finally noticed me, Fossil Fuel."
A pair of golden-brown irises fused with hers, like the afternoon sun shining through a glass of whiskey, swirled with caramel crescent moons and trapped by a thick, hazy limbal ring. The girl was rendered paralysed. A familiar face stared back at her with an expression that transcended all synonyms of beauty. A boy. The boy. His profile bore the most tender grin she had ever seen, and crinkles of innocence dotted the corners of his eyes — she felt lucky to have witnessed such alluring features.
From afar, he had been gorgeous, but from up close? She might have underestimated just how perfectly crafted he was. She refused to believe he existed in a world outside of her dreams.
"...Dohwa?"
He smiled wider. "Bingo! I knew it, we have an unspoken connection..." He trailed off, slowly noticing that Y/N wasn't listening to him. "Hey! Are you mad because of my stupid greeting? I thought we had gro—"
"Dohwa." She repeated with more diction, mirroring his enthusiasm a beat later. "Loverboy in the flesh! Who would have known?"
"You know, I'd been trying to talk to your dream self for weeks now. You're always too busy dying at an intersection to listen to me." He groused, earning an offended gasp from her.
"I don't know, maybe try getting your bones crushed every night by a speeding car. That would explain things."
"Oh come on, I'm being serious here! You don't have to ignore me to check off your daily accident bullet point from your To-do list!"
Y/N almost laughed at that. Almost.
"To clear your super kind and respectful doubt, I've never really been able to act freely inside my dreams until now."
Dohwa beamed. "It must be killing your conscience to avoid me, I get it. Anyway. This is Seoul?" He assessed his surroundings with a bewildered pout. "Looks different."
It was different, alright.
"Listen." Y/N gathered some broken chunks of air to combat the flourishing anxiety in the pits of her stomach. "I'm about to sound crazy but... this is not the Seoul you live in, Dohwa."
He frowned. "Huh?"
She snapped her fingers and directed his attention to the lined-up movie posters on the street walls, each of which highlighted 1993 in their footnotes, the manufacturing and expiry date of the drink he had just purchased, and the calendar in an old barber's shop. She knew she hadn't gone insane yet.
Dohwa, however, remained silent. His palms were warm and snug in the grey hoodie he was clad with. He blinked. Repeatedly. His gaze darted from one object to another, his cheerful countenance trading itself in favour of disbelief.
"I... I swear I couldn't read a single thing in my dreams before. Maybe your mind is creating an old version of Seoul and—"
"I'm sorry." Y/N released a defeated sigh. "One of us is wrong about the current timeline, and I just proved to you that I'm clearly not."
Quiet. Intolerable quiet. A chuckle of amusement.
"Who cares?" Dohwa nudged her forwards; a sign for her to loosen up a little. "Keep all those worries aside. Right now, we're miles away from reality. Let's make the best of it!"
He was correct. If she started overthinking, she'd be hurled into a spiral of endless confusion. For starters, she was interacting with this dude in a realm that wasn't even authentic.
The ends of her mouth curled into a gentle arch. "True. Whatever flows, flows."
"That's more like it, dinosaur! Whatever flows, flows!"
"Get out."
He feigned an expression of hurt. "You're having a rendezvous with your beloved partner and this is what you have to say?"
"Don't try me."
"Won't you show your favourite idol trainee around?" He shot her a cheeky wink, but it deflected back at him with an infuriated click of her tongue. "This Seoul seems so interesting." He hastily added to cover his failed attempt at cracking her indifference.
Y/N pretended to weigh her options. "Hmm, I don't know. What do I get in return?"
"Me!" Dohwa aimed his thumb at his chest. "Anybody would kill to be in your position, you know?"
"Cocky bastard. Forget I even asked." She muttered bitterly, gesturing for him to tail after her. "Since this isn't reality..."
"None of our actions have consequences." The blond finished with a giddy undertone.
"Exactly. I'd been wanting to go to this store and hoard every snack it had — good thing I have an accomplice with me to share the blame."
He nodded with dramatised understanding. "I'd been wanting to do some illegal stuff too. We're truly two sides of the same coin."
"...Illegal stuff?" She raised a questioning brow, increasing the distance between them for the sake of precautions. "Hopefully it doesn't involve murder."
"What the hell." He glared at her, evidently appalled. "I meant stealing or breaking into private property."
"Must be hard to not commit crimes as a popular trainee." She commented, rolling her eyes.
Dohwa was fuming at this point. "You're literally the one who suggested shoplifting and somehow I'm the bad guy!"
"Oh no, did I anger the pretty golden retriever? My sincerest apologies."
"So you think I'm pretty."
"Pretty stupid."
The two continued to bicker mindlessly while they navigated through the vibrant pathways of the neighbourhood Y/N had memorised each nook of. Dohwa halted every few minutes to slide in a query about something that piqued his interest, and the girl responded to him in a distracted tone before continuing to poke fun at him. Nothing else was of importance, except for the sprinkles of snickers and giggles they basked under.
It had been a while for them to unravel their personalities like that. Without fretting about the problems that awaited them at their doorways, at their schools. This was a brief moment of respite. Of seeking the joy they had lost amid their conundrums.
"This is our destination!" Y/N declared with a toothy smile. "Barge in and go crazy."
Dohwa sent her a mock salute. "Yes ma'am."
They both grabbed a shopping cart, sliding inside before sharing a knowing look. The store was surprisingly empty — not a single soul behind the cash registers, not a single presence other than theirs.
"Wow." Y/N whistled with amazement. "This couldn't get any better."
"Does that mean I get to sit in the cart without any judgemental adults gawking at me?"
She stifled a groan of annoyance. "And who do you think will be pushing it from behind?"
The blond ignored her rhetorical question and adjusted himself to fit in his freshly claimed vehicle, his legs dangling down the edge. "Sweetheart, I'd appre—"
"I'm going to throw up. Don't ever call me that again."
He clutched at his heart. "...Did you hear that?"
"What?"
"That was my heart shattering to pieces. Grandma, you're bruising my ego."
Y/N tutted, grabbing the cart's plastic handle and moving it ahead with no regard to the accidental bumps Dohwa had to suffer. He complained the whole time, and she didn't bother sparing him a glance, throwing every snack into his lap absently.
"Try this," She handed him a white container and a beer-shaped pop. "Your Seoul probably doesn't have these anymore."
He inspected the items with a flare of curiosity, putting the beer pop into his mouth as if it were a cigarette. After unpacking the sealed box, he felt a tsunami of excitement overtake him; his former intimidating appearance morphing into a juvenile one. "This is good stuff!"
Inside it were two miniature hamburgers, french fries, and cola bottles — all made of jelly.
"Heh. Such a kid."
"You're just a hag."
"Do you still have the fish-shaped buns over there?"
Dohwa was positively aghast. "I cannot imagine a life without Bunggeopang, Y/N."
"Well, how's it like?" The wheels screeched against the spotless marble, reigning above the store's tranquillity.
"The buns?"
"The everything."
She tried to sound as nonchalant as possible, but the vortex of nerves inside her chest was anything but unaffected. It was incredulous. The simple thought of Dohwa being from the future. Had she been imagining him the whole time? What if he wasn't an actual human being to begin with?
"Not that epic, honestly. Su-ae and... ugh. Eunhyeok. Yeah, they are the only people I slightly care about. The smartphones are a great addition, though!"
"What a development. From rivals to best friends."
"We're not best friends."
"In love, then?"
"Gross. Shut up."
"You can tell your human diary anything. The most embarrassing secrets too, you know."
He let out an exasperated grunt, burying his face into the pile of snacks that rested on his tummy. "It was different when we didn't know each other! Now this is so... mortifying."
"Lord, however will I recover from this painful rejection." She stated monotonously, "I'm absolutely devastated that you do not trust me."
Dohwa pointed his nose up in the air. "Serves you right."
"Our irrevocable link, our weeks of bonding, did they mean nothing to you? Was it a game, loverboy?" She continued reciting the playful script, swerving the shopping cart around and placing her arms on either of the sides to cage the boy. He paled in an instant. "You have tarnished this partnership. We're over."
He stared at her, baffled and lost. Then a loud snort reverberated through the abandoned aisles.
"You're a phenomenal actress!"
She forced herself to maintain her composure, but she, too, was falling victim to an inevitable laugh that was clawing at her throat.
"My misery is an act to you? You're a star-to-be. Worry about your reputation."
He inched towards her, a dimple popping on his left cheek. "That reminds me — my Seoul barely has stars anymore." His voice dropped to a whisper, his warm breath tickling her skin. She swallowed a confused noise at the sudden proximity. "Since it's the 90s, like you've said, I'm sure the sky is pretty much laden with them."
It was. Millions of stars were embedded into the obsidian infinity akin to the shards of a glass. Some gleaming, some faded, yet they were loved all the same. A constellation didn't care about the shimmer, the glamour, the twinkle. It weaved a family of mythologies with the dazzling and the dull. No discrimination involved.
Soon enough, they found themselves on a random building's rooftop, eating the raided food together. This wasn't even one per cent of what this city had to offer, but Y/N didn't want to leap over any boundaries by showing him around without his consent. She let him savour the night's glow, watching a glint of nostalgia spark in his hues. He was next to her, and somehow, still lonely.
Dohwa was the sparkle, and Y/N was the dark.
He would always be brighter. Always be the nucleus. Always be the flower bees flocked to.
And Y/N would just be a fortuitous phone call.