This Is Us - Chapter 32: Chapter 32

MATTY POV
"What the heck is that?"
Jaydean pointed at my gingerbread man and I licked the frosting off my fingers. Thomas and Luca looked over from their own gingerbread decorations at my ginger mess and laughed just as openly as my daughter. We sat around the dining room table on Christmas morning after breakfast with a couple of mugs of hot cocoa and matching plaid pajamas. Knowing the real festivities wouldn't begin until we got to my dads'.
"What? You don't like it? I think it's pretty accurate," I excused the disaster that had become of my little guy.
What was supposed to be his light brown hair looked more like zigzags, his smile looked more like a demonic smirk, and his outfit got a little messed up when I tried to make an ugly sweater so I just covered him in black instead. But with the smirk and the all-black attire, my little guy looked like he was about to direct a cult sacrifice instead of joining the family of cheerful little gingerbread.
"It's quite...interesting?" Luca tries to be nice about it as he skillfully finished his gingerbread man which had light blue eyes, swirls of chocolate brown hair, and a sweater which matched the flag of his native country with matching pants and loafers...fucking loafers.
"It looks like it's going to go cannibal and eat the other gingerbread men," Thomas says, his gingerbread man looked like him with his black glasses, a cute little tux, and a friendly smile.
"Also accurate," I added and Thomas and Luca both snorted while Jayde stayed oblivious, quickly going back to her gingerbread girl wearing a candy cane dress and a little headband to match its light red hair and freckled little face.
I put down the piping bag and stretched in my chair, wishing I could crack my spine by myself but that was nearly impossible with the amount of pain I was in. Sure, the morning sickness was practically nonexistent. I only got a little dizzy and nauseous every once in a while. But the back pain was proving to be a different situation altogether.
I gently rubbed my lower back and let out a small sigh as I could feel the babies making small movements, sending flutters through my stomach at the same time. Feeling them moving around and being active was always a blessing, giving me some reassurance every day that they were still alive and they were okay.
I worried more these days about my little Mika, especially after reading about smaller babies being absorbed by their siblings for nutrients. That shit was another level of terrifying. I mean, imagine being eaten alive by your siblings as some survival of the fittest type nightmare
"You okay hon?" Thomas asked and I just nodded slowly.
"Yeah, I'm fine just my back really hurts," I groan and push the cookie away from me so I could rest my elbows on the table and plant my face in my hands as I waited for the pain to go away.
"Is my baby brother being a meanie to Mommy?" Jaydean asked and I nodded in response. I nearly jolted out of my seat when I felt a pair of warm hands on my shoulders.
"Relax Matty, it's just me," Thomas whispers as he runs his hands on my tight muscles.
"Jesus Matty, you're so tight," He mutters and I opened my eyes to meet Luca's.
"That's what he said," I chuckled and they both rolled their eyes at the same time.
"Hmm. turn around so I can get your lower back," Thomas commands and I do, resting my chin on the back of the dining room chair. He sits in the chair behind me and turns me so now I'm facing Jaydean. Thomas' prosthetic legs kicked me but I didn't even bother complaining as his magical fingers did wonders to my back.
While he was helping soothe what had become a constant pain, I watched our little girl put the finishing touches on her gingerbread girl. Painting little red mary jane's in frosting, Jayde definitely has her Papa's artistic gift and I made a mental note to encourage her to draw more. I already bought her a large art set Christmas and I was excited to see all the creations she was going to bring to me.
But as she worked the frosting with her delicate fingers, I watched her little face of determination and couldn't help but see just how beautiful she is. Her dark red hair let down in loose waves tucked behind her little-pierced ears.
A sense of pride swells in my chest as I watched her. Like I made this? How is it possible that I made something this fucking beautiful?
"I love you nugget," I sighed and she raised her brow as she put down the bag and turned to me, taking my cheeks in her hands and holding my face in her hands.
"I love you too mommy," She says to my face and kisses my chin since she's too short to reach anything else.
"Better?" Thomas asked as he rubbed deep circles into my lower back.
"Mmm so much better baby, you should do this every day," I sigh and he slowly stopped massaging my back, running his hands around my waist.
"Does it hurt like this every day?" Thomas asked and I nodded again, closing my eyes and resting my cheek on the cold wood of the back of the chair.
"Yeah, it hurts like hell but what can I do? I don't want to risk anything by taking meds so...I'm just living with it," I confessed and I felt his hands on my stomach. The costume team were going to have a lot of fun hiding the dominant bump for our New Years performance, that's for sure.
"I'm sorry babe," Thomas sighs and I looked back at him.
"What are you sorry about? It's not your fault," I gently reminded him but he shrugged.
"It kind of is and as happy as I am to meet this little guy, I just hate seeing you in pain," He says but I just yawned.
"Look, I'm all done! Can I decorate the extra ones?" Jaydean asked and I nodded. She quickly got to work on the four mini gingerbread men we made out of the extra dough and my heart skipped a beat as I thought of the present I was about to give Thomas.
Luca put all the gingerbread together in a row on a sheet pan with him on one side of Jaydean and Thomas and I on the other side. I reached over and turned the pan around, putting Luca on the other side of Thomas, letting Jaydean hold my hand.
"How cute, we'll have to share this with the fans," Thomas adds and I agree, but Luca hesitated.
"Are you sure you want mine like that then?" He asks with a nervous tone to his voice but Thomas stood up and took the picture from above, ignoring Luca's pleas.
"This is our family Luca and this is who we are. We can't be ashamed of it or try to hide it because that will just let the people who judge us win and it will teach those who live this lifestyle that they too have to hide who they truly are," Thomas explains in simple terms that drive his point.
The man's dream was to one day give a TED talk and I have a feeling that once we retire from NTB, he'll definitely accomplish this goal.
The speech brings a smile back to Luca's worried face and while we were distracted, there was a tiny snap and we instantly turned our attention to Jaydean, who had taken a piece of my gingerbread man's leg.
"You little criminal!" I gasped as she munched on my leg and giggled.
"What? It had the most frosting!" She argued and we all laughed out loud.
"Why don't you cover the extra gingerbread men in frosting and eat them then?" I asked but she shrugged.
"Cause I'm not going to eat my baby brother!" She argued and I gave her shoulder a gentle punch.
"Oh sure, but you can eat your mommy's leg!" I fought back and she looked me dead in the eyes, as she took another bite.
"You savage beast," I gaped and Thomas rejoined Luca on the other side of the table, both of them reaching out and taking both my arms.
"HEY!" I smacked their hands but they crawled away before I could take my arms back. As a result, I reached out and stole Thomas' legs.
"Accurate," He laughed and we continued snatching each other's body parts until there was one cookie left standing. But not a single one of us dared to touch Jaydean's.
"Look, I finished my baby brother!" Jaydean smiled as she raised the mini ginger boy, dressed in a blue onesie and white baby shoes.
"That's cute, you can put him right next to you," I pointed to the tray and she gasped when she saw the crumbs that were left.
"Mommy! It's a crime scene!" She cried out and took the yellow frosting, making a square on the pan to 'tape off' the crime scene and preserve the evidence.
"Where did you learn that from?" Luca asked and she put down the piping bag.
"When the police came in and taped up our house they said it was a crime scene," She explained and all of our smiles faded.
"Oh," Thomas sighed, still awaiting news of the charges against him.
"Are we still going to see Abuelo and Halalboji?" Jaydean asks, thankfully changing the depressing subject and everyone quickly perked back up.
"Of course we are, what are you most excited for?" I asked her and she hummed.
"I'm excited for Halaboji's delicious food and I get to talk Hangugo y Español," Jayde says and I look at the time, deciding it was time for her to get ready since she takes the longest.
"Why don't you start getting ready baby. Go hop in the shower and we'll pick out your dress together okay?" I command and she quickly runs along with the incentive of her grandparent's house as her driving force.
"I guess we should get ready too huh?" Luca suggests but I reach out and grab both of their hands. The dining room table was skinnier than a regular table and we were so close that if I just leaned over a teensy bit, I could kiss both of them.
"Actually, I wanted to have a talk with you...both of you," I told them and the air around us got really serious. Thomas and Luca both looked fearful and I cleared my throat, I let go of them and stood up. Walking over to the Christmas tree and grabbing up the rectangular box I had wrapped up and labeled for both of my significant others.
I placed it down on the table with a slam that startled both of the guys as I kept up the dramatic act.
"I'm not gonna lie to you, what's in this box, my gift to you, is going to change our lives forever," I told them and they both gulped at the same time.
"Matty, you're scaring me," Thomas hints and I sit down in my spot again, turning to Luca first and cupping his hands in mine.
"Before we open this I just wanted to say, that even though you struggle with your PTSD, I believe you are a beautiful addition to this family and I can't imagine what our lives would be like if you weren't here. I also know that you question whether or not you're a good father because you never had a father to learn from, but I can tell you with absolute certainty that in Jaydean's eyes, you are the best father a little girl could have. I appreciate everything you do and I love you for who you are. You're so genuine and I hope many of your traits are passed down to the little ones with the amount of time they'll spend with you,"
I tell Luca first and he tears up a bit.
"Matthias, I swear to god. Why are you doing this?" He asks as he tilts his head up to keep his watery blue eyes from leaking.
"Because you two mean the world to me and I want you to know that before you open this box." I tell him and turn to Thomas, holding his hands in mine.
"And Thomas,"
I had to pause, feeling like I was going to cry now just looking at his confused face.
"There are so many things I want to tell you that if I listed them all, we'd be sitting here for hours. But after just five years with you by my side, I know I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you in it. You literally built the foundation for this family, you picked me up when I was desperate and in need, you made me smile when I cried, and you laughed with me when you never had to. You're also an amazing father who I'm so thankful to have as a role model for Jaydean and our baby. I know I haven't exactly been the best person to live with this past year but in all that time I never doubted the love you had for me and appreciated the extra lengths you went through to keep the disaster hidden from Jaydean,"
I told him honestly and his face softened but he wasn't as emotional as Luca.
"Matthias, I love you too and that was really sweet, but what the fuck is in that box?"  He questioned and I laughed because he had every right to be confused. I'm never like this.
"Alright, go ahead and open the box," I hand it to him and he slowly unties the ribbon as if a bomb might go off and takes the cover in his hands.
He looks at Luca who bites the tip of his thumbnail in nervous anticipation, curling his legs up to his chest. The two look at me before making eye contact again and Luca nods for him to continue.
Thomas slowly takes off the lid to the box, revealing four baby bottles, labeled A, B, C, and D with a single sonogram for each baby, underneath the bottle. Each bottle was filled with pink or blue milk according to their gender. Baby A and B's bottles were the light blue, C's was pink, and D's was also blue.
Thomas drops the lid and the two look at the objects confused.
Great, I'm married to idiots.
"Matty...is this what I think it is?" Thomas stutters and I nodded. Luca's mouth drops as if he finally understands and he looks straight at me.
"You're having four babies?" He asked and I nodded again, expecting him to jump up for joy, not have his eyes roll to the back of his head as he fainted off the chair and onto the floor.
"Christ Luca," I mumbled under my breath and looked under the table, watching as Cooper licked his face and pawed him to wake up before turning back to Thomas.
"So...you're telling me we're having four babies...three little boys and one girl," He slowly says aloud as he tries to fight the shock that took over his body so he wouldn't end up on the floor like Luca.
"Yup, were going to have five kids, I think we're going to have to invest in a van," I tell him and stand up, working my way over to him. He quickly pulls me onto his lap with his strong arms wrapped around me and I feel his tears wetting the shoulder of my t-shirt.
"You okay babe?" I chuckled and he just nodded while squeezing me tight.
"Am I okay? You just told me we're having four babies! I'm a lot more than just okay!" He cries and I turned my head to gently kiss his cheek.
"There's four so I hope at least one of them is identical to you," I revealed my dream and he sighed, rocking me back and forth.
"Oh my god Kitten, I don't care if they're like me, like you, or both, I love each and every one of them. Holy shit, I'm going to be a dad of five," He says and I kissed his cheek again and again.
"Yeah, both of you are...wait...Luca?" Both of us turned to the floor and looked at Luca who was slowly starting to come to.
"Should we be concerned?" I asked Thomas but he shook his head.
"No, he'll be okay after a while, I almost joined him," Thomas admits and I continued to nuzzle myself against him.
"Four babies...it's a miracle," He sighed into my ear as he gently kissed it.
"I want to name the smallest boy Mika," I tell him and he nods.
"I couldn't think of a better Christmas present,"