This Is Us - Chapter 36: Chapter 36
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"Do you guys think you're ready for that New Years Performance?"
Dad asked as we all dove into the massive platters of food in front of us. It must have taken Appa at least two days to cook all of this delicious food, all my favorite Korean dishes mixed together with traditional American ones in perfect harmony.
"Are we ready? Yeah. Are we excited? That's debatable. I'm more nervous than anything," Kailani explains and I couldn't help but look at the empty chair beside her.
"Where's Milo?" Appa asked the uncomfortable question and she shifted in her seat.
"Um, he's sick and couldn't make it," She lied, knowing the real reason why he wasn't here. I kicked her under the table and she narrowed her eyes at me.
"Poor kid, sick on Christmas. He still should have come. I wouldn't have minded," Appa sighs as he digs into his food. Kai nods in agreement, playing with the food on her plate after being caught.
I missed Milo too, our parents practically adopted him after his own family disowned him for being transgender and the man was like a brother to me.
"I'll bring him some food later and check on him," Kai offers in an attempt to get our minds off him. It was his first Christmas in six years without us and I had to admit, I was a little bit worried about him.
"Of course, I'll help you after dinner," Appa smiles without knowing of the breakup.
The conversation shifted to Mahina as dad asked his Paris transplant granddaughter how she was doing in school and if she liked the ballet she was doing this year. I sat in between Luca and Thomas, with Thomas talking to his sister quietly about some family matters. I turned to Luca and he ate a small piece of ham, meeting my eyes with a small smile.
I knew that smile all too well.
I placed my hand on his thigh and narrowed my eyes, Cooper had his head on Luca's knee and was whimpering gently.
Luca shook his head but I didn't believe he was fine for a second. He slowly put his fork down and forced himself to swallow before staring down at his lap. His fingers slipping over mine and I gave his larger hand a gentle squeeze.
He gulped and scratched the back of his head, Cooper now pawing at his leg to distract him. Finally, Luca rubbed the top of his head while giving my hand a reassuring squeeze. His genuine smile returned and he gently leaned over and kissed my cheek, intertwining our fingers together as he started to eat again with his other hand.
I kept checking on him throughout the rest of dinner, keeping a lower profile when it came to the conversation so I could focus on Luca's mini-episode.
After dinner, we all walked into the living room, too stuffed for dessert just yet, Appa had suggested we hang the stalkings. Butterflies filled my stomach, not only from the babies but from my nervousness. Wondering how he would react to the little stalkings at the bottom of the cardboard Christmas box holding my family's stalkings.
"Our family keeps growing, soon we won't fit on the fireplace and we'll have to figure out something else," Appa sighs as Dad lights the fire, sitting down on the white brick the fireplace rested on as he watched Appa struggle to figure out where he would hang his husband's stalking.
Jaydean decided to go up to her Abuelo and took comfort in snuggling up on his lap as he wrapped his arms around her. The fire started to crackle and a silence fell over all of us as he hung Taehyungie's after his. He did so every year for the past ten years but it never lessened the hurt we felt when he did so.
I leaned against Thomas, resting my head on his shoulder as I watched him hang Mahina's, Clara's, Kai's, and Milo's. Instead of hanging Milo's, he decided to put it off to the side so he could fill it an send it with Kai I'm assuming.
He finally opened my family's box and pulled out my stalking with Thomas', smiling as he now added Luca's. I looked over, watching Luca's genuine smile as he hugged Cooper and gently pet him to keep him relaxed.
"Are you finally doing mine?" Jaydean asked, reading her name as he hung it up. Dad gently kissed the top of his granddaughter's head and rested his chin on top of her crown of red braids.
"Yup, you're the last baby this year, I..." Appa went to put the box down but looked into it and I had never seen my Appa so shocked. His mouth dropped as he gasped as he clapped his hands over her open lips. Tears streaming down his face as he leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.
"What just happened?" Dad asked, looking so confused as he went to grab the box and looked inside. Catching sight of the baby's mini stalking with the name 'Mika' written in the perfect scroll.
I stood up an dusted myself off a bit, laughing gently as I approached my poor Appa, who just broke down in front of me.
"You're going to name the baby Mika?" Dad asked, his own eyes getting a little red as I hugged my Appa who cried into my shoulder. Unable to speak because he was so touched.
"Appa, calm down. You're going to faint if you keep breathing like that!" I laughed out loud and he smacked my chest with his long sleeve.
"Shut up!" were his first words to me after finding out one my son would be named after him.
"Wait! You're pregnant!?" Kailani screamed and the whole room erupted with joy as all three of my sisters found out at the same time.
"There's more you know," I hinted and Appa pulled away from me sniffling, his sweet light brown eyes a beautiful disaster of spilled tears of happiness.
"What do you mean?" He asked and looked back at the box, he picked it up from where he dropped it. His hands still shaking as he lifted baby Mika's from the box to find another stalking labeled 'Boy A', 'Boy B', and 'Girl C', underneath Mika's name also read a small 'Boy d'.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW," Appa choked out and now Dad stood up as they both hugged me.
I wanted to stay right there in that single moment of effortless happiness filled with bliss. Surrounded by the people I loved and fuelled with a warmth unlike anything else in this world.
And for the first time, I couldn't wait for my little babies to join us.
Dad asked as we all dove into the massive platters of food in front of us. It must have taken Appa at least two days to cook all of this delicious food, all my favorite Korean dishes mixed together with traditional American ones in perfect harmony.
"Are we ready? Yeah. Are we excited? That's debatable. I'm more nervous than anything," Kailani explains and I couldn't help but look at the empty chair beside her.
"Where's Milo?" Appa asked the uncomfortable question and she shifted in her seat.
"Um, he's sick and couldn't make it," She lied, knowing the real reason why he wasn't here. I kicked her under the table and she narrowed her eyes at me.
"Poor kid, sick on Christmas. He still should have come. I wouldn't have minded," Appa sighs as he digs into his food. Kai nods in agreement, playing with the food on her plate after being caught.
I missed Milo too, our parents practically adopted him after his own family disowned him for being transgender and the man was like a brother to me.
"I'll bring him some food later and check on him," Kai offers in an attempt to get our minds off him. It was his first Christmas in six years without us and I had to admit, I was a little bit worried about him.
"Of course, I'll help you after dinner," Appa smiles without knowing of the breakup.
The conversation shifted to Mahina as dad asked his Paris transplant granddaughter how she was doing in school and if she liked the ballet she was doing this year. I sat in between Luca and Thomas, with Thomas talking to his sister quietly about some family matters. I turned to Luca and he ate a small piece of ham, meeting my eyes with a small smile.
I knew that smile all too well.
I placed my hand on his thigh and narrowed my eyes, Cooper had his head on Luca's knee and was whimpering gently.
Luca shook his head but I didn't believe he was fine for a second. He slowly put his fork down and forced himself to swallow before staring down at his lap. His fingers slipping over mine and I gave his larger hand a gentle squeeze.
He gulped and scratched the back of his head, Cooper now pawing at his leg to distract him. Finally, Luca rubbed the top of his head while giving my hand a reassuring squeeze. His genuine smile returned and he gently leaned over and kissed my cheek, intertwining our fingers together as he started to eat again with his other hand.
I kept checking on him throughout the rest of dinner, keeping a lower profile when it came to the conversation so I could focus on Luca's mini-episode.
After dinner, we all walked into the living room, too stuffed for dessert just yet, Appa had suggested we hang the stalkings. Butterflies filled my stomach, not only from the babies but from my nervousness. Wondering how he would react to the little stalkings at the bottom of the cardboard Christmas box holding my family's stalkings.
"Our family keeps growing, soon we won't fit on the fireplace and we'll have to figure out something else," Appa sighs as Dad lights the fire, sitting down on the white brick the fireplace rested on as he watched Appa struggle to figure out where he would hang his husband's stalking.
Jaydean decided to go up to her Abuelo and took comfort in snuggling up on his lap as he wrapped his arms around her. The fire started to crackle and a silence fell over all of us as he hung Taehyungie's after his. He did so every year for the past ten years but it never lessened the hurt we felt when he did so.
I leaned against Thomas, resting my head on his shoulder as I watched him hang Mahina's, Clara's, Kai's, and Milo's. Instead of hanging Milo's, he decided to put it off to the side so he could fill it an send it with Kai I'm assuming.
He finally opened my family's box and pulled out my stalking with Thomas', smiling as he now added Luca's. I looked over, watching Luca's genuine smile as he hugged Cooper and gently pet him to keep him relaxed.
"Are you finally doing mine?" Jaydean asked, reading her name as he hung it up. Dad gently kissed the top of his granddaughter's head and rested his chin on top of her crown of red braids.
"Yup, you're the last baby this year, I..." Appa went to put the box down but looked into it and I had never seen my Appa so shocked. His mouth dropped as he gasped as he clapped his hands over her open lips. Tears streaming down his face as he leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.
"What just happened?" Dad asked, looking so confused as he went to grab the box and looked inside. Catching sight of the baby's mini stalking with the name 'Mika' written in the perfect scroll.
I stood up an dusted myself off a bit, laughing gently as I approached my poor Appa, who just broke down in front of me.
"You're going to name the baby Mika?" Dad asked, his own eyes getting a little red as I hugged my Appa who cried into my shoulder. Unable to speak because he was so touched.
"Appa, calm down. You're going to faint if you keep breathing like that!" I laughed out loud and he smacked my chest with his long sleeve.
"Shut up!" were his first words to me after finding out one my son would be named after him.
"Wait! You're pregnant!?" Kailani screamed and the whole room erupted with joy as all three of my sisters found out at the same time.
"There's more you know," I hinted and Appa pulled away from me sniffling, his sweet light brown eyes a beautiful disaster of spilled tears of happiness.
"What do you mean?" He asked and looked back at the box, he picked it up from where he dropped it. His hands still shaking as he lifted baby Mika's from the box to find another stalking labeled 'Boy A', 'Boy B', and 'Girl C', underneath Mika's name also read a small 'Boy d'.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW," Appa choked out and now Dad stood up as they both hugged me.
I wanted to stay right there in that single moment of effortless happiness filled with bliss. Surrounded by the people I loved and fuelled with a warmth unlike anything else in this world.
And for the first time, I couldn't wait for my little babies to join us.
End of This Is Us Chapter 36. Continue reading Chapter 37 or return to This Is Us book page.