This Love We Have - jikook ff - Chapter 39: Chapter 39

Jungkook's POV
My mind is so blank. My heart's been beating so fast since I left the room where I'm confined. I just don't know what to feel. I'm so nervous, worried, scared and excited at the same time. But scared tops it all. I'm having this fear of seeing Jimin in a critical condition. Negative thoughts are filling up my mind. I didn't notice tears are already forming at the corner of my eyes. As Jin is pushing my wheelchair, I can't help but shake. My other leg can't stop shaking just like my hands. My right hand is on the arm rest while the other hand is on my lap, trying to calm my shaking leg.
"We are here." Jin hyung spoke. I looked up and see a door and then glanced back to Jin. He smiled at me but I can't smile back. This is breaking me inside. And then, a tear escaped from my eyes. He then became serious. He went on my front and leaned down to look at me in the eyes. I quickly wiped it away and forced a smile.
"Jungkook, stop crying now." He lightly pat my shoulders while Min Joon is curiously looking at me. So, I pinched his cheeks making him gigle.
"Let's go inside. Are you ready?" Jin hyung went back behind me. I took time to breathe normally first.
"Yes, hyung. Let's go." I told him. I closed my eyes to control myself. Then, I heard the door slowly opening. I stayed with my eyes still shut. I can hear the sliding sound then my wheelchair started to move. He stopped for awhile and I can hear the door closed. We didn't move, maybe because Jin is waiting for me to make the next move. I managed to relax my breathing. I tried to control the nervousness that is consuming my heart because I can clearly hear the beeping sound from the vital signs monitor. Hearing that dreadful sound is killing me already. When I thought I'm okay, I started to open my eyes, with head still facing the ground. I can see the white floor. I began looking up slowly as my heart started to beat the worst. My eyes saw the bed and I can't still handle the tense that is already building inside me. Should I continue or just leave this room? But, I looked up anyway. When my eyes fell on the body lying on that bed, that's when it hit me. My heart shattered into pieces as tears rapidly filled my eyes. I covered my face with both my hands as I burst in tears.
"Jungkook. Please please stop crying. Come on." Jin held my back and gives me circular motions. But it is not helping me. I'm crying more instead. I tried to look at him again as tears are still flowing. I can't stop it. I held my heart with my fist and covered my mouth to not make loud cries but my body is not coordinating with my mind. It's like I totally lost control of it. I didn't even notice that Jimin's parents is in this room with his fiancé. My eyes are still glued to Jimin who looks so weak and delicate and lifeless right now. Hiccups formed between my sobs that only means I'm crying so hard right now. My eyes wander to his side and saw his vital signs. I don't have any idea what it reads but that beeping sound is killing me more at this very moment. Jin hyung placed his hands on both my shoulders, lightly caressing it to help me calm.
My eyes then suddenly went to his mother who is walking towards me. I looked at her face and noticed she's crying, too. I don't know what to after all these years. When Jimin and I were still lovers, his parents have been so supportive of our relationship. I even consulted and planned with them about my supposed-to-be proposal that night when Jimin's fake scandal happened. And that I regret so much for believing the lie made by Jisoo and fell right into her trap. I know they are still so much mad at me, now that I know Jimin suffered so much from his heartbreak and was about to commit suicide. I want to just die right now for causing all of that to their precious son. I lowered my head and waited for whatever his mother's about to do to me. Slap me, punch me, hurt me, kick me, grab my hair or even kill me, I will accept it all because I deserve all of that. I'm the worst guy in the world. I waited for her hands slapping my cheeks but it didn't happen. What she did was what I never expected to happen.
She wrapped her hands around me and hugged me tight while still crying. I stopped crying for awhile because I can't process what is happening right now. She should be slapping and hurting me.
"Thank you, Jungkook. For saving Jimin. Thank you so much for bringing him back to us." My eyes went to his dad, his brother and Hee Yeon. They were all facing the ground. Hee Yeon is crying as well.
I can't even say a single word as I'm so shocked. I started to cry again while Mrs.Park is rubbing my back. I tried to control the hiccups caused by crying so hard. Mrs. Park then broke from hugging me and cupped my face. She started to caress my face but I can't help but still feel ashamed. Why is she still good to me?
"M-Mrs. Park. I'm s-so sorry for e-everything." I said, releasing hiccups again as I cry.
"Shh. Shh. Don't worry about it, dear, hmm? I have already forgiven you. I know you didn't mean to do that to our son. You were just blinded." She gave me a genuine smile. Something tingles in my heart. Why is she so kind towards me always? She's like this to me even before. She always treat me like her own son, too. She's reallu such a great person. What did I even do to deserve this?
"Thank you, Mrs. Park." I tried to talk without stuttering.
She then stood properly and smiled at me.
"Drop that formal name. Just call me by what you used to call me before." My eyes grew wide at those words she just said. What?? Does she mean I must call her 'Mom' again? But I'm not Jimin's fiancé or even his boyfriend or bestfriend or close friend or whatever anymore. I've hurt her son so much. Jimin is engaged now and in fact his fiancé is here, hearing everything. I looked at Hee Yeon but she's still beside Jimin, holding his hands.
"Don't worry about her. She won't mind, I promise. She knows I always treat you like my own son." She smiled at me. My eyes then fell to Jimin's dad. And, I almost choked in my own saliva by his intense stares.