Thoreau - Chapter 32: Chapter 32

"Spring, you want to sit up front or in the back?" Grace asked as we walked to Gamma Landry's truck.
In the back, please. I like to feel the air in my fur, he said as he jumped in, easily clearing the tailgate.
"There's a blanket back there if you want it. Make yourself comfortable," she told him, and he nodded.
As for me, I climbed in the passenger seat as Grace got behind the wheel and fiddled with the mirrors.
"Won't Gamma Lan need a ride home?" I asked, making sure to loop Spring into the conversation through the link.
"He's here all day. It's his job. His and the other gammas," she explained. "During the school year, he said he works nights and weekends, but over the summer and during breaks and holidays, he switches out with the other gammas who want a change."
"Gamma Lan's still in school?"
"Yep! I am, too, even though I'm nineteen. I only need three credits, though. We'll be seniors with Konstantin and Peri and Beta Ty and luna this year!"
"What is a senior?"
"It means it's our last year. We'll graduate in the spring and be done with high school."
"Good job!" I clapped my hands for her. "I am happy for you! But why are you so old?"
"Nineteen isn't old, Reau," she frowned at me.
"Oh, you know what I mean." I flapped a hand at her. "I thought most people graduated at seventeen or eighteen."
"Well, education isn't easy to get in White Pelt. Most of the pack don't bother to graduate high school. I had to really make an effort to get as far as I have."
"Well, I'm proud of you for being dedicated enough to do it! I hope I am smart enough to graduate!"
"Of course you're smart enough," she said. "You might be like me and need a little help with a few subjects, but that doesn't have anything to do with being smart."
"What subjects do you need help with, big sissy?"
"I struggle with Spanish, but Landry knows one of the pack girls who agreed to tutor me. Her name's Yolanda Ramirez. Do you know her?"
"Nope, but you can ask Peri or Beta Ty. I bet they know most everyone your age at school."
"Good idea. I just hope she's patient. I really do have a hard time with all those tenses."
"Spanish is tense? When Mama gets tense, Papa rubs his shoulders. Will your tutor rub your shoulders?"
"I think not." Grace rolled her eyes for some reason. "Are you taking a language?"
"Yep! 'talian, of course!" I crowed. "Papa and Bubble are going to help me!"
"Papa and who?"
"Bubble! You know, my new older brother." When she shook her head, I sighed. "Konstantin Russo. You just met him, you indoor anus!"
"Okay, Reau, I'm going to say this to help you out, not to hurt your feelings. You can't call anyone an indoor anus. Or even an anus. It doesn't mean what you think it means and it's not polite."
"Oh, no! I'm so sorry, big sissy!" Then my eyes flew wide open as I realized something. "Beta Ty lied to me? I am aghast! He should not have lied to me! I trusted him!"
"Aghast? You know aghast, but not anus?" She closed her eyes and shook her head.
"Eyes on the road, big sissy!" I shouted. "Do you want to die?!"
"Reau, I am going ten miles an hour because we are still in the parking lot. Even if I crashed into your papa's monster SUV, we'd be fine."
I ignored her words, just happy she'd opened her eyes again.
"Listen, Beta Ty didn't lie. You just— There was a misunderstanding, that's all. An ignoramus is a dummy. An anus is your, um, butt hole."
I sat in stunned silence for a whole minute.
"A tushy hole?" I squeaked.
"Yes."
"I called you a tushy hole twice," I gasped, then covered my mouth with both hands. "Oh my goodness! I am so sorry, big sissy! Will you please forgive me?"
"Of course. I knew you didn't understand what it meant. Now you do, so don't say it anymore." She paused, then added, "Well, unless someone's being mean to you, then you can call them that. But not the indoor part. That's just weird."
"So I should call someone a tushy hole if they're being mean to me?"
"Sure. There's another word people use, too, but it won't be the same coming from you, so we won't worry about it."
"Good. I like not worrying."
She grinned as she pulled onto the main road and headed toward my house, and I decided I would come up with some good insults with my besties later.
Hmm. Wayne will try to teach me a bunch of swear words, and Arch will say, "Language!" half a dozen times, so maybe I'll avoid all of that and just ask Bubble.
Then again, I would probably never use any insults. I didn't like being mean to others, even if they were mean to me first.
It didn't take Grace long to drive to my house, and I quickly changed my clothes and grabbed Spring's service gear from the hallway closet.
"Ready to see the magic trick, big sissy?" I held his collar around my wolf's neck and waited until she nodded to snap the pieces together. "Ta-da!"
As soon as the buckle was fastened, Spring transformed into the big, shaggy dog again, and Grace clapped with me.
"Amazing!"
"I know, right?" I petted his floppy ears, which were very different from his wolf ones. "And Spring is so nice to do this just to be with me."
"That's true. You are a very good friend, Spring," she told him.
I'd rather take a hit to my dignity than stay here alone all day. Besides, I can't leave my little one unprotected, and I want to be with him.
"I want to be with you, too, Spring." I kissed him between his eyebrows.
"Aww!" Grace patted both of our heads, and we let out happy hums at the same time. "Hahaha! You two are adorable!"
I've gone from a fierce beta to an adorable dog, Spring moaned, but I was sure he was playing because he nudged me with his head and licked my elbow.
"You'll always be a fierce beta, Spring," Grace said as she looked him in the eyes. "Even if the witches turned you into a cat, you'd still be you inside."
"A cat!" My eyes widened. "If they turned you into a cat, you could be friends with—"
NO! Spring howled. Grace, don't put ideas in his head! Reau, I do not want to be a cat. Ever. Never, ever, ever, ever!
"Okay, okay," I giggled. "I was just teasing."
"All right, little booger, let's head to the store before your teasing gets you into trouble."
"I have boogies again?" I touched my fingers to my nostrils. "I blew my nose after I changed clothes. Are they still there?"
This time when I tilted my head back, she looked, then shook her head.
"Boogie free."
"Then why did you call me booger twice?"
"Where I come from, it's a kind of teasing nickname for someone who gets into mischief." She shrugged. "I won't call you that if it bothers you."
"It makes me think of boogies, and I don't like boogies," I told her, snapping my fingers a little nervously. I really liked Grace and didn't want her to get mad at me because I didn't want her to call me booger.
"Oh, hey, it's okay." Smiling, she held out her hand and I took it. "Don't be afraid to say you don't like something. How about I think of an extra special nickname just for you?"
"Really?" Looking at her with wide eyes, I gave her my best smile. "Thank you!"
"You make me think of a cute little bear when you do that!" she giggled as we walked out of my house and back to Gamma Landry's truck. "Should I call you little bear?"
"My zias call me that."
"Well, what about honey?"
"Nope. Mama calls me that."
"Little puppy dog?"
"Papa."
"Sweetie?"
"Luna." It was my turn to giggle. "Try harder, big sissy!"
"If I'm big sissy, then you can be little brother! Ha!" She waited until Spring hopped into the truck bed and I had my seat belt on before she started the engine.
"Too late. My friend Briar calls me that."
"Well, dang. I thought I had a good one there." She pulled out of our driveway and was quiet for a minute, then grinned. "Oh! I know! Baby!"
"Everyone calls me that." I rolled my eyes.
Literally everyone, Spring told her.
"I will not be defeated! Hmm. Maybe this would be easier if you told me all your other nicknames so I know to avoid them."
"All right. Zio Leo and Zia Poppy call me Buddy. Wayne and Arch call me Curls—"
"—and William and Winnie Black and River call me Toro, although that's only because neither Winnie nor River can say Thoreau correctly and William thinks it's cute."
Whew! I'd managed to cover all of them just as Grace parked the truck.
We opened our doors and jumped out, and I grabbed Spring's leash and clipped it on his collar before he hopped down from the truck bed.
"Does anyone even call you Thoreau?" Grace cut her eyes over at me and raised one eyebrow.
"Sure. Lots of people, and Mama and Papa said most of the teachers at school will—"
She was being sarcastic, Spring cut in.
"What's that mean?"
"It was a bad joke," Grace said before Spring could explain. "Well, there's one I didn't hear in that long list, although since none of us here know half of what Angelo's endearments translate to, we might be running a risk. Still, what do you think about lovely? My grandma used to call my mom that."
My mouth dropped open.
"You— You think I'm lovely?" I whispered after a moment.
"Inside and out, Reau, inside and out."
"Thank you, Grace. I think you are lovely, too." A little smile tilted up the corners of my lips, and my face felt hot for some reason.
"You're so cute, I can't stand it!" she squealed.
Next thing I knew, she threw her arms around me and pulled me into a tight hug. She was soft and squishy everywhere, just like the new stuffies I bought for my secret room, and I hugged her back with a happy smile.
Gamma Landry would not like to know you're snuggling into her bumps, Spring linked me in a stern tone.
She's snuggling me into them! I protested. Although she probably can't help it. Her bumps are very large.
Reau! Spring scolded.
What? It's true.
You don't have to point it out like that!
I'm just talking to you. I wouldn't say it to her or anyone else. I sucked in a big gulp of air as Grace finally set me free. I bet Gamma Lan loves to rub them with his—
Okay, Reau. Enough.
What did I say this time? I tilted my head in confusion.
What happens between mates in the privacy of their bedroom is their business, no one else's. And it would embarrass Grace if she knew you were picturing her and Gamma Landry mating.
Mating?! I squawked. I was only going to say rub them with his face! What else would he rub in them?
Don't. Ask, Spring growled.
I narrowed my eyes at him as he walked next to me, and my brain suddenly filled with all kinds of interesting thoughts. His human was twenty-one when he died in March. I'd been curious about Everett Breckenridge, but didn't want to hurt Spring, so I'd asked Arch and Wayne to tell me a little bit about him.
He sounded like a fun guy, a bit of a troublemaker, and full of energy, but Arch also pointed out that he and Spring had trouble getting along because of some decisions Everett made. Arch wouldn't tell me any more about it, but I'd overheard Wayne say something about the former beta 'humping and dumping' a lot of girls and the occasional boy.
I didn't know what that meant until I asked Zio Leo, and he said it meant someone mated with a lot of people, but didn't stay with them for long. When I got confused as to why someone wouldn't stay with their mate, zio 'splained they weren't with their mates, but rather anyone they wanted. Then I asked why people wanted to be with someone other than their mates.
"Some people choose to wait and others don't," he'd said simply. "Shifters know we have a Goddess-given mate and some of us feel like we'd be cheating on them before we ever met. Besides, if you knew there was a perfect partner out there waiting for you, why would you waste your time on temporary relationships you knew weren't going to last? Others don't see it that way. They want to explore as much as possible before they're 'stuck' with one person for the rest of their lives."
He'd held up his hands and wiggled his pointer fingers when he said the word stuck, then had to 'splain what air quotes were and when to use them.
"It's a personal choice. I know you promised Binda you'd wait, but it's your decision," he'd said.
"Why did you decide to wait?" I'd asked him.
"I wanted to learn with my mate, not teach her, but even if she hadn't chosen to wait for me, I wanted her to be my first."
I, too, wanted my mate - hopefully, mates - to be my first, so I wasn't upset I'd promised Binda without really understanding what I was promising.
I was a little worried about it, though. Papa said he'd give me more pacific details when I was older, which I knew would help, but I wasn't so smart. And I was clumsy. And I didn't always understand everything. What if I messed up mating so bad that I upset or hurt my mates or made them disgusted with me?
Now, though, I had Spring. Unless he'd slept through Everett's humping and dumping every time - and it sounded like there were many, many times! - he knew a whole lot about mating!
Biting my bottom lip, I started hopping up and down with excitement. Just like Grace had a tutor for Spanish, he could be my tutor for mating!
"Reau? What are you doing?" Grace laughed as Spring looked at me with his dark doggie eyes.
I opened my mouth to tell her my terrific idea, then snapped it shut really fast. I knew Spring pretty well by now, and I had to work up to it, not spring it on him.
Spring it on him...
Spring it on Spring...
I got stuck on that for a minute, saying it over and over in my mind because it sounded so fun, then shook my head, determined to stay focused.
"Time to buy sexy pink leggings!" I shouted and knew I was too loud when several humans swiveled their heads to stare at us.
Staring at myself in the dressing room mirror, I rolled out my bottom lip and sniffed.
My tushy didn't look anything like Livvy's.
We weren't able to find pink leggings in our sizes - extra small for me and extra large for Grace - but we did find purple and blue ones with white unicorns, which we both thought were super cute.
Now, though, I realized they weren't super cute on me.
I heard sniffing coming from the changing room next to me and wondered if Grace was having the same problem.
"Big sissy?" I called.
"Yeah?"
"Why doesn't my tushy look like Livvy's?" I sniffed again. "It doesn't look sexy at all!"
"Mine, either." She sniffed again, too.
"Oh, I'm sure it does," I argued. "It's so nice and chunky with lots to squeeze! How could it not look sexy? But mine's small and bony! There's nothing at all to squeeze!"
"Mine's too chunky with too much to squeeze," she argued back. "I need to lose a little more weight before I can wear something like this and look sexy."
"I bet you look so sexy!"
"Reau—"
"I'm coming out!" Throwing open the changing room door, I marched out and stood in front of hers and tapped on it. "Come on, big sissy. I have mine on to show you and my tushy looks terrible. Let me see yours, please."
"I can't believe I'm doing this," she muttered, but I heard the door unlock. "Don't link Landry what I look like!"
"Of course not! That would give away the surprise!"
"Dear boy," she said as she opened the door and poked her head out, "I'm not going to wear these in front of him until I lose at least twenty more pounds."
"Let me see!" I demanded.
Reau, Spring warned me.
"Sorry, big sissy. You don't have to show me if you are uncomfortable."
"No, it's okay. It's just you out there. Well, and Spring."
And I'm just a wolf, he chuckled.
With a sigh, she stepped out of the dressing room and did a slow spin, and my eyes widened.
"Big sissy! Your tushy is even sexier than Livvy's!" I gasped. "Hers looks hard and firm, but yours looks soft and squishy! I want to squeeze it so much!"
"Please don't." She spun around, grabbing the hem of her t-shirt and tugging it down.
"Of course I won't! Binda 'splained all about good touch and bad touch," I told her. "And Zio Leo said private parts are only for yourself and your mates to touch. Oh, and a doctor if something is wrong with them. But that's it! Anything else is bad touch! Tell your safe person if someone touches you there!"
"That's right, lovely." She smiled widely, then sighed again. "Reau, you are very sweet to say I look sexy in these, but I know I don't."
"Same for me, big sissy." I slowly twirled around like she did. When my back was to her, I reached around and smacked my left cheek. "I don't even have a tushy to show off! I thought I did because I've been eating so much food since I came to live with Mama and Papa, but look! Nothing but bones!"
"You are too cute, lovely," she giggled.
"I don't want to be cute." I dropped my head and pouted. "I want to be sexy."
Both of you stop, Spring said. Your tushies don't have to look like Livvy's to be sexy. Reau, Wayne and Arch are going to need to take a cold shower after seeing your little booty in those leggings.
"A cold shower?" It took a minute before I understood what he meant. When I did, my face felt all hot, but I smiled a little, just like when he 'splained what 'arouse' meant.
Yes, and Grace, if you are not comfortable wearing them, don't wear them. Reau's right, though. If Everett were still alive and you were unmated, he'd be all over you, trying to get you to go home with him tonight. Gamma Landry is going to— Well, I can't say it in front of innocent ears, but you know what your man's going to do if you wear these in front of him.
Her face turned bright pink, and I giggled.
"Let's get them, big sissy. Even if we're never brave enough to wear them. Oh!" I looked at Spring. "What about a pair for Mama? Papa said to get him a pair, but I have no clue what size he wears."
I think your papa was just teasing your mama, Spring chuckled.
"He's always teasing Mama." I rolled my eyes. "Wait! What time is it, big sissy? I'm 'posed to meet everyone at Roger's Diner at 12:30. Have you eaten there before?"
"Yeah. Beta Ty and his mate Peri took me out for dinner one night shortly after your papa and Alpha Jayden rescued us from the hunters' prison. It was the first diner I've ever eaten at."
"Wow. Roger's was my first diner, too!" I grinned, happy to have a connection with her. "Did your old pack not have diners?"
"No. White Pelt is in a very remote, isolated wilderness. The pack only ever gets together in high summer to trade and work on preserving food for the winter. The rest of the time is for trapping, fishing, hunting, and foraging. Everything revolves around getting ready for winter because once the first snow hits, you're pretty much stuck in your family cabin until the spring thaw."
Sounds like a very hard life, Spring said, and I agreed with a nod.
"It had its good points, and I learned a lot of survival skills and how to be self-reliant, but yes, very hard and with little time for anything fun or creative."
"Well, I'm glad you're here now, big sissy. Isn't it strange how the Goddess works? If those hunters hadn't snatched you, you never would have met Gamma Lan!"
Every cloud has a silver lining, Spring murmured.
"Really?" I asked with wide eyes. "Chime Karma is going to take me for a ride in the sky. If we go through clouds, do you think I will find silver inside them?"
"He meant that even bad things can have something good about them or cause something good to happen," Grace 'splained.
"Oh." I tapped my finger on my chin as I thought about that for a moment. There was something bothering me, and hearing her say that gave me an idea. "Grace, do you think Papa will mind if I buy some presents for someone?"
"Probably not." She shrugged. "He told me to get whatever you wanted within reason."
"What does 'within reason' mean?" I asked her.
"If you want a Mercedes, the answer's no, but if you want a video game, that's okay."
"What's a Mercedes?"
"A fancy, expensive car."
"I'm not even old enough to get my license yet, big sissy." I rolled my eyes. "But my besties are going to teach me how to drive a dirt bike tomorrow! That is, if Mama and Papa will still allow me to stay at their house tonight."
"It's only eleven, so we have a whole hour and a half before you need to be at the diner." She looked at her phone before putting it back in her pocket. "Plenty of time to finish shopping."
"Okay, big sissy! I'm so excited!"
"Can I ask you a question, Reau? You don't have to answer it if you don't feel comfortable, okay?"
"Sure!"
Goddess, Grace, he has no shame and no filter. You don't know what you're in for, Spring groaned.
She ignored him and asked her question anyway.
"Are Arch and Wayne your boyfriends?"
"I wish they were," I whispered and smiled at the ground. "I like them so much."
"Well, did you ask them to be your boyfriends?"
"I can do that?" I looked at her with wide eyes. "We told each other I love yous, and WayWay said, 'The three of us are forever now.' Do you think that means they want to be my boyfriends?"
"Yes, I do, lovely, and what Wayne said means that he wants it to be an exclusive relationship."
"What is 'sclusive?"
"Ex-clu-sive. It means you three and only you three, no one else."
"Good." I nodded. "That is what I want."
"I assume your mama and papa had a talk with you about mates and mating?"
"Yep!"
"And I guess you have your watchdog to make sure things don't get out of hand." She looked at Spring with a wide smile.
Thanks, Grace. He rolled his eyes, making her chuckle.
"Are Arch and Wayne who you want to get presents for? Oh!" she squealed and bounced up and down on her toes. "Are you planning to give them something when you ask them to be your boyfriends?"
"I didn't think of that," I said slowly, "but I guess I should."
"You don't have to," she hurried to tell me, "and I didn't mean to influence you either way. I'm not used to so much socialization, so I don't always think before I open my mouth. If you want to ask them, you can. If you don't, you don't have to. It's all your decision on your timeline."
"No, I want to, and I'd like to get them a present, but I don't have any money."
My bottom lip popped out as tears of frustration filled my eyes. Everything cost money, and I didn't have any or even know how to get some!
"We have your papa's credit card and he said you could use it."
"No! That's not my money! It has to be mine! It's important!" I wailed, unable to find the words to make them understand.
Then Spring's big body pressed against me gently but firmly, just like he did earlier when I was so scared.
Shh, Reau. We understand. We know it's important and we know why. Deep breaths. Don't cry now. We'll help you find a solution. Breathe in, little one. And now breathe out. Good job. Do it again.
Once my chest stopped going up and down so fast, I lifted the front of my t-shirt and wiped my eyes.
"I have an idea, Reau," Grace said and held my hand again. "You could make them something. That wouldn't cost much, if anything, and it would mean so much more than anything you could ever buy them."
"What?" I sniffed. "What could I make? I am not smart enough to know how to make things."
"Sure, you are!" She made a frowny face. "You're really smart, and I can teach you a few crafts."
"What kind of crafts?" I didn't even really know what crafts were, but had a distant memory of art class in elementary school and my friend Briar taking the glue away from me when I tried to eat it because it smelled like strawberries.
"Are you good at drawing or painting? You could create a picture of something special to the three of you. Or you could make friendship bracelets in their favorite colors with a little pink added to represent you. Or—"
"Show me a friendship bracelet, please."
When she linked me what they looked like, I squealed and dropped her hand so I could clap mine.
"Perfect! Yes, I want to learn to make those! Will you please teach me, big sissy?"
"Of course! It's easy and I know lots of different patterns. We could go to my house before lunch and I'll teach you how to make them. It doesn't take long."
"Do you think Wayne and Arch will wear them?" I asked with wide eyes.
"If you made them, I'm sure they will," she chuckled. "I don't know what colors of thread I have at home right now, but we can always stop somewhere and get more. Speaking of that, what kind of store do we need to go to for this anonymous person's present?"
"A pet store!" I crowed. "Squidge needs toys!"
You're kidding me! Spring growled. That creature needs an exorcism, not toys!
"Wait." Grace held up one hand. "Who, or what, is Squidge?"
"Zia Maria's cat!" I chirped at the same time Spring said, A demon from hell.
"You don't play with him!" I insisted. "That is why he is bad and doesn't like any of you."
Thoreau. He tried to claw Wayne's face off. That goes beyond dislike.
"Only because Wayne called him Murder Mittens and Lucipurr. Squidge is sensitive!"
He destroyed one Gelo's brand-new boots and pooped in the other one.
"Papa put holy water in his dish! That insulted him!"
And you think a feather on a ribbon is going to make him nicer to everyone? Spring snorted. A monster doesn't stop being a monster just because you're nice to it, Reau.
"If Wayne and Arch have a little toy to give him, maybe he will like them! Right, big sissy?" Since she didn't know Squidge, I hoped she'd be on my side. "And if Squidge likes them, he'll be nice to them, and we can all be friends!"
"Well, it doesn't hurt to try." Her eyes went from Spring to me and back to Spring. "And Landry said there are two dollar stores in town. One has everything for five dollars or less, and the other has nearly everything for a dollar twenty-five. We can get cheap toys at one of them so it won't be a big waste if he destroys them."
Ha! Spring smirked. More like if he destroys Arch and Wayne. But sure, Reau. Get them offerings to sacrifice to the evil beast. Maybe it'll appease him.
I didn't know what Spring was talking about, but he'd said sure, so it was all right that I didn't understand.
"And we can pick up the thread we'll need for the friendship bracelets," Grace added and gave me a pretty smile. "That way, we can make sure you have the colors you want."
"Great!" I smiled back, then sang out some of my new favorite words. "Come on, Spring! Let's go!"